“Nice, why don’t you throw me under the bus some more.”
“He also went along with Jack’s plan for Joe to seduce Sofia for information.”
“Is your plan to piss her off so much that she doesn’t want anyone around?” Jack asked Corduroy.
“Baby, I just wanted to keep you safe.”
“Yeah, from a seizure that may or may not happen in the future. Instead, you just pissed me off.”
He flinched. “You’re not going to shoot me, are you?”
“Not in front of the police,” I snapped.
“Mommy, why aw you going to shoot Daddy?”
I bent down and smiled at her. “I’m not going to shoot Daddy. Mommy just wants to. You’ll understand when you’re older and have a husband.”
“Nice,” Jack grinned sarcastically. “Way to teach her young.”
I smiled at him as I took Alessa’s hand. “Well, we can’t all go around throwing people in jail for stupid reasons. Some of us have to resort to violence.”
I walked out the door, ignoring everyone I left behind. They were all conspiring against me, and that just pissed me off. It was time I got the girls together and we planned a way to teach them a lesson.
15
Jack
“Good job, jackass,” I said, shoving into Corduroy. “Not only did you send Carly off on a killing spree, but you pissed off her husband.”
“I thought you wanted to piss him off,” he asked as if confused.
“Now I’m trying not piss them off, and you went and made everything worse.”
“Wait,” he shook his head. He had blood dripping from his lip where Josh attacked him. Swiping at it, he frowned. “You’ve spent the past two years being pissed at them and doing anything you can to make their lives hell, and now you have an issue with me helping Carly, because it pissed off Josh? I don’t get it.”
“I’m trying to move past all that,” I growled. “I was trying to make amends and you went and fucked it up.”
“For me,” he said slowly. “I didn’t put you in the line of fire at all.”
“Except with Carly. Christ, why did you have to go and piss her off?”
“Because she needed it.”
“No, what she needed was the town to look after her.”
“Look at my jaw. Does this look like the mark from a woman that needs to be looked after?”
“Yes,” I snapped. “Now she’s really pissed off. What do you think is going to happen?”
“Um…she lets off some steam and feels better?”
I snatched up my phone and dialed Eric’s number. Christ, this was all going to hell in a handbasket.
“Who are you calling?”
“The only sane member of the Cortell family.”
He groaned, flopping down in the chair across from my desk. “Do not call Eric. The last thing we need is some long, boring speech about being a good human being.”
“Carly’s about to go crazy. We have to make sure she doesn’t get into too much trouble.”
“How much trouble can she get in?” he asked incredulously. “She’s pregnant.”
“Never underestimate anyone married to the Cortell brothers.”
Eric finally picked up with a wary tone of voice. “What did I do this time?”
“Nothing, it’s what Corduroy did.”
“Crap, what did he do?”
“Strategy session in twenty minutes. My office, and leave Josh out of it.”
He sighed heavily, grumbling under his breath. “This should be fun.”
“It’s not supposed to be fun,” I said before hanging up the phone.
Corduroy eyed me from across the desk. “What’s with the sudden change of heart?”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, dropping my eyes to my desk. Crap, I really didn’t want a little heart to heart right now. I already told you I was trying to move on.”
“You were there when Carly was taken to the hospital and ever since, you’ve been all Team Cortell. This is so far beyond just moving forward. So, what is this really about?”
“Nothing. I’m just doing my job.”
“It’s not your job to get involved in personal matters. This is about something different. You’re getting involved again.”
I frowned, not liking the way this conversation was going. “I’m not—”
“You miss it,” he laughed. “That’s what this is. You’ve finally decided to move on from what happened, and now you find yourself wrapped up in the Cortells’ problems and you like it. You want to be part of their lives again.”
Sighing, I looked at him. “What do you want me to say?”
“Just admit it,” he grinned, kicking his feet up on my desk. I glared at him and he took them down. “See, before, you were holding onto that anger so tight you would have eventually lost your shit and gone crazy. But now, you’ve decided to let go of your hatred and you want to be normal again.”
“I am normal,” I said, picking up my baseball from the desk and throwing it at him. Unfortunately, he caught it and laughed at me.
“See? You don’t like the fact that you want to see them again. Because if you can’t hold onto that anger, you’ll feel like you’re letting Natalie down. Only, this is what Natalie would want, and that pisses you off even more, because then you know you have to really let go of everything.”
He nodded, grinning like an idiot.
“You think you’re so smart.”
He tapped his finger to his head with a grin. “Because I am. It took the whole right side of my brain to come up with that little nugget of information.”
“It’s a shame you didn’t use your whole brain. You might have come up with a more logical explanation.”
He barked out a laugh, thrusting his fists into the air in victory. “God, I love it when I’m right.”
“I never said you were right.”
“You didn’t have to. I know you too well. Before, you were pissed at the world. You never would have even crossed the street to speak to one of the Cortells unless it was to give them a ticket. But in the last week, you’ve managed to get yourself wrapped up in their business so much that you haven’t even pulled out your notebook once. You could have written Carly up for punching a cop. Or you could have put Josh in the slammer for doing the same thing. And then there’s the fact that you just willingly called Eric when you could let this all go. And you even told him not to bring Josh in, because you know Josh is outside his mind right now with worry. You care.”
I snarled at him. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
“I would,” he grinned. “I would go so far as to say that you’re excited to have them all come here so you can finally feel like yourself again. You like this!”
Swearing at myself, I got up and paced the office. Fuck, I knew he was right, but that didn’t mean I wanted to admit it.
“So what if I want a little normal? Is that wrong?”
“Hell no, but it would speed this process up if you could just admit that you like them.”
“Fine, you want me to say it? I like the Cortell brothers. Fuck, I even like Josh and I want them in my life. Are you happy now? Does that make you giddy with joy?”
He grinned at me, shrugging slightly. “It makes me happy, but I’m guessing it makes them even more happy.” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder and Eric appeared with a strange look on his face. “Yeah, you didn’t hear them come in, but I did. You’re welcome.”
“For what?” I seethed.
“For making this so much easier. See, if I hadn’t pointed out what you wanted and guided you to say what you truly felt, this uncomfortableness could have gone on for another year.”
Eric cleared his throat and walked in, followed by Robert. “So…does this mean you’re going to stop arresting us?”
I glared at the man, now angry that I had just admitted that. Fuck, I hated Carter. “If anything, I’m going to do it more often.”
“Why?” he asked, shocke
d and confused.
“Because I can,” I taunted. “And because Corduroy is an asshole.”
“Hey, that’s not nice.”
“Neither is tricking people,” I snapped.
“Yo!” I heard Joe shout as he walked in. “Why the hell did you drag me down here in the middle of work hours? I was with a client.”
The door slammed again and Will walked in. “You know, I moved farther away so I didn’t have to be here all the time. I swear to God, I see more of you guys now than when I lived here.”
“What’s this about anyway?” Eric asked.
Andrew walked in completely covered in something white.
“What happened to you?” I asked, nodding to his clothes.
“The fucking baby threw up all over me. It was like a geyser. I tossed her at Lorelei and got the hell out of there.”
“You didn’t actually throw a baby, did you?” Carter asked. “Because I’m pretty sure that could get you locked up.” He turned to me. “Jack? You want to make good on that threat?”
“Not tonight. We have other things to worry about.”
“So, what’s going on?” Robert asked.
“Carly was in here earlier because this dipshit arrested her.”
“Technically,” Carter stood up and grinned. “I didn’t arrest her. I goaded her into punching me so she could let off some steam.”
“And then you hauled her down here with Sofia.”
“You arrested my wife?” Joe said incredulously. “Why wasn’t I called?”
“Would you relax,” Corduroy said. “It was completely harmless, and I had things under control until you had to go and bring up the meeting,” he gestured to me.
I gritted my teeth. “I didn’t do that. You did.”
He grinned. “Oh, right. That would be me. Anyway, long story short, Carly knows about the whole secret meeting we held here, and she’s really pissed.”
“Good job, Corduroy,” Eric glared at him. “Now we have a pissed off woman running around, and she’s going to make life hell for all of us.”
“So, we need a way to get her under control,” I nodded.
“If you could just learn to be a decent human being and not try to goad everyone in town, none of this would have happened,” Eric seethed.
Corduroy rolled his eyes. “God, I should have bet on that. Didn’t I tell you he would give a speech about being a decent human being?”
The door banged open and Nathan walked in. “This better be good. I’ve been in surgery all day and I need sleep.”
“We’re here about Carly,” Joe said.
“Christ, not again. How many times are you all going to go through this?”
“Corduroy pissed her off,” Andrew said helpfully.
“So, let her be pissed,” he sighed. “Was this really worth calling me down here? I’m not even part of this weird little family dynamic you have going on.”
“Well, you’re Charlie’s best friend and she would want you involved, so now you’re involved.”
Nathan narrowed his eyes at Will. “It’ll cost you.”
“How many?”
“Ten.”
“Five.”
“Nine.”
“Six.”
“What’s going on?” Corduroy asked.
“They’re making a deal for baseball games,” Robert said, leaning against the wall like this would take a while.
“Nine or I’m walking out that door,” Nathan threatened.
“Fine, nine games, but you’re buying the food and drinks.”
“Deal,” he nodded. “Okay, so, what’s the Carly situation?”
“Basically, Carly’s pissed and we have to find a way to rein her in before she goes on a rampage,” I said.
“How pissed are we talking?”
“Probably not as pissed as when they took away her license. Let’s say, a mix of irritated and losing her shit.”
“Ooh, I have the video footage,” Carter said gleefully. “I had Mary Anne film it for me.”
“You take way too much pleasure out of this,” I muttered.
“Well, I knew it would be good. After Mrs. Meyers told me Carly threatened her this morning, I knew she would explode.”
“I’m so glad you find joy in tormenting my sister-in-law,” Eric snapped. “If Josh were here, he’d kick your ass.”
“Which is precisely why he’s not here,” I said. “Josh is too blind when it comes to Carly. He’s losing it, making up illnesses she doesn’t have because he’s terrified. We need to find a way to calm him down.”
“Since when do you care?” Robert asked.
“I don’t think now’s the time to talk about Jack’s twisted relationship with Josh,” Joe muttered.
“Why are we even here?” Nathan reiterated. “Did you not hear me the last time? Leave her alone,” he said slowly. “She doesn’t need a babysitter. She doesn’t need a nurse. She needs to just feel normal.”
Andrew snapped his fingers as he nodded. “You know, he’s right. Carly expects us to freak out, so we need to do the exact opposite.”
“Thank you,” Nathan shouted, throwing his hands in the air.
“Right, so she expects people to watch her every move, to be make sure that she doesn’t accidentally hurt herself.”
“Okay,” I said slowly. “So, what? You think we should just leave her alone?”
“Precisely, and while we’re doing that, we’ll have cameras monitoring her every move. We can have Sofia take Carly out for the day and I can slip inside and set up cameras, motion detectors, I could even put a breathing monitor under her sheets.”
“That’s…not the opposite of what she would think you would do.”
“Exactly!” Andrew grinned. “It’s so far beyond. Look, we’re thinking like regular guys, but we need to be thinking WWDD.”
“What?” Nathan said. “What would who do?”
“Not who,” Andrew grinned. “Derek.”
“But none of us are Derek,” Eric said in confusion.
“Come on, he’s like a super spy. We need to pull from his experience and do what he would do,” Andrew said excitedly.
“Except Derek is missing, and he would probably knife someone instead of monitoring them,” Eric said.
“Derek’s missing?” I asked. When had I missed that?
“Since Carly seized,” he nodded. “I’ve been trying to reach him, and when I couldn’t, I went out to Pennsylvania with Andrew and Robert to search for him.”
“Why didn’t you just come to me? I could have had answers for you by the end of the day.”
“Oh, because you’re always so willing to help us?” Eric laughed humorlessly. “Come on, we both know the only way you’d help us is into the ground.”
“Not when it really matters,” I snapped. “If you had just told me, I would have reached out to the police department in his town and found out anything I could.”
“It wouldn’t have mattered anyway,” Eric sighed. “They don’t know anything more than we do now.”
“What did you find out?” Carter asked.
“Someone came after them and they went ‘underground’. Whatever the hell that means. Sean said he would call when he had more information.”
“See?” Andrew said excitedly. “This is the type of shit I’m talking about. Derek, the man of mystery, knows how to handle his shit. We need to aspire to be more like him.”
“No,” Nathan said emphatically. “You need to stay out of Carly’s business.”
“Yeah,” Robert snorted. “Especially after seeing you try to be like Derek. Face it, bro, you’re never going to be cut out for espionage.”
“Exactly,” Andrew nodded. “So, who is Derek?”
“Our brother,” Robert said slowly.
“Exactly, and what does Derek do?”
“Shoots people,” Will answered.
“Right, except we want to do the opposite of shoot our wives.”
“So, you want to kidnap them?�
�� I asked.
He nodded, motioning that he was thinking. “Alright, not bad. Now we’re on a roll. So, kidnapping…He also likes knives and guns, underground bunkers, spying on people, panic rooms—”
“Tying people up,” Eric supplied. I looked at him strangely. “What? I thought we were just listing random shit that wouldn’t be helpful to anyone.”
“Andrew’s right. Can’t you see the answer is simple?” Joe said. “You guys are thinking too far outside the box. Guys, we have our very own PI right here. Hell, he could take Lorelei with him. She could randomly show up anywhere Carly is. Just think, every move she makes, someone’s watching her. He can set up the monitors inside the apartment and watch from out in the car, just like a real PI.”
“I am a real PI,” Andrew snapped.
“You’re PI light,” Robert laughed.
“At least I could seduce my wife,” Andrew snapped.
“Hey, I was defending you,” Joe spat.
“Sorry, you got in the line of fire,” Andrew apologized. “But seriously, how do you screw up fucking?”
Joe frowned. “She said I was getting fat.”
I barked out a laugh, seriously contemplating my own sanity right now. Why had I thought going to these guys would help anything?
“Look, I’m not playing any part of this, and Will, you shouldn’t either. If Charlie found out you were in on this, she would hand you your balls,” Nathan snapped.
Will glanced around the room uncomfortably. “I am trying to get her pregnant.”
Joe snapped his fingers. “You have the inside track. Start talking nonsense about getting Charlie pregnant. Bam! Charlie runs to Carly and you have a bonding moment and a doctor right there to watch over her.”
“How can you be sure she would run to Carly?”
“Because they’re both pregnant. Duh!”
“Your logic is so twisted,” Nathan said, rubbing his forehead. “If you start monitoring Carly, what’s next? Are you going to do it to all of them when you think something’s wrong? It’s insanity. You can’t do it. And eventually, one of them will snap and kill you.”
“Lorelei,” Robert nodded.
“What? Why her?” Andrew asked.
Drawing Dead: A Small Town Romance (A Good Run Of Bad Luck) Page 13