I snorted. “So you’re saying I’m too boring in bed to be freaky.”
His eyes widened. “Fuck no. I’m not saying that at all. You’re perfect for me in bed. I’m saying that we’ve been doing this long enough that if you wanted me to choke you, you would’ve told me already.”
Somehow Van had gotten me to giggle.
“I’d say no,” he assured me, “but you would’ve asked by now.”
“Wait.” I stopped giggling. “Why would you say no?”
Now he brought me back close to him. “Because there’s not a chance in hell I could do that to you. Hit you or choke you even in sex play. Not seriously.”
“You slapped my ass last week.”
“That was a love tap. That is not choking you and you liked that.”
He was right. I had liked it.
“Now…” He leaned down until we were eye to eye. “Isn’t Lawson supposed to be taking care of this?”
“Yeah. I was going to find him and see where we’re at with that.”
“Want me to come with you?” he asked.
I sighed. “Better not. After last night, I’d rather he just be focused on this for now.”
“I’ll walk you.”
Van slid his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him as we made our way to the venue. Once inside, he went his way and I went mine.
As I walked, I sent Lawson a text asking where he was. He told me which room he was in and I headed there.
At first, he was talking to someone else, but once he was done, he came right for me.
“What’s up?” he asked his hands on his hips.
“Where are we with the whole social media bullshit?” I probably could’ve asked nicer. After all, he was helping me out.
“He got in. I was having him check around to see if he could figure out who was doing it.”
“I know who it is.”
“OK.” He nodded. “See if we can prove who’s doing it. Why? What’s up?”
I ground my teeth together as I showed him the same thread I’d shown Van. It pissed me off that the men in my life, especially my only brother, were seeing this shit said about me.
That muscle at the corner of Lawson’s jaw jumped as he clenched his teeth together. Finally, he looked at me. I mean really looked at me.
“Fuck.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Forget everything I’ve said. Delete everything. The apps. I’ll text my guy and have him shut everything down. I’m sorry this is happening and I’m sorry I wasn’t quicker.”
Tears filled my eyes. This whole thing sucked.
“Come here.” He opened his arms to me. I stepped into my brother and he tightened his arms around me. Feeling protected like that gave me the permission I’d needed to break a little.
I didn’t sob or soak his shirt. But I let my guard down because I could. This was my brother and he loved me. He’d protect me, putting himself between me and anything with the intent to hurt me. Which explained his attitude toward Van. But that had to end.
“OK.” I pulled back and wiped under my eyes, though they were mostly dry. “I feel better.” Sort of. It wasn’t a total lie.
“You all right?”
“Yes. Thank you for making me feel better.”
“I did nothing.”
“You did enough,” I told him. “Enough that I’m not going to give you shit for that garbage with Van last night.”
“I—”
“Nope.” I didn’t give him a chance to justify himself. “Are you and Daisy good? She was pissed at you last night.”
“Yeah.” He nodded. “We’re fine.”
“You sure?” I asked. “You talked?”
He got this grin on his face. One that I said I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
“We talked.” Close call. “Among other things.”
“Gross.” I groaned. “I’m telling her brothers that you’re touching her special places.”
He chuckled loudly. “I’m sure they already know. That’s why they hate me.”
I shook my head. Guys were ridiculous. I started moving toward the door, only stopping once I had it open. “Speaking of…You have to lay off Van. I love him and you’re going to have to get over whatever is going on between the two of you and before you try to say something dumb like what about him, I’ll be saying the same thing to him. Bye.” I slipped out the door and shut it quickly behind me just to ensure that Lawson wouldn’t have a chance to reply.
I didn’t need to hear it.
Something about talking to my brother gave me a determination or bravery I hadn’t had before. Not sure which.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket and chose Nora’s name. I should’ve deleted it by now and I would after this call, but I needed to hear what she had to say.
“Why are you calling me?” she answered.
“Why are you answering?”
“To see why you’re calling me.”
She made no sense. “I want to know why you did this. What did I do that was so bad?”
“You know what you did.”
“I don’t.” There was nothing that I could think of that would make her this mad. Like enough to seek revenge and to ruin my life.
“Oh, please. You know I wanted to meet your brother,” she told me. “You wouldn’t introduce me to him.”
She had to be kidding me. “He wasn’t around. He’s gone a lot. Are you saying that this is all because I didn’t introduce you to my brother?”
“Not just that, but you that I wasn’t good enough for him and I feel like you would’ve done it for one of your other friends.”
“He never would’ve dated you,” I yelled. “You’re too young for him. He’s oddly unreasonable about that.” Even if he ended up falling for Daisy but that was neither here nor there. If I was being honest…I didn’t want Nora with my brother and not just because of what she was doing now. But because even then, when I thought she was my friend, I kind of knew her personality sucked.
But this couldn’t be all about my brother.
“His current girlfriend is my age.”
“Why do you know about his girlfriend?” I snapped, suddenly protective over Daisy.
“It’s all over the internet. Her band is getting big and she’s a female rock star. There aren’t many of those. Of course, people are interested in who she’s with.”
“What does that have to do with me?”
“Well, when I found out they were together and she’s my age, I knew that you just didn’t want me with your brother. Then I started talking with Jared and it all came together. The Styles clan think they’re better than everyone else.”
“Who the fuck is Jared?”
“A guy from your Art history class. He said you wouldn’t give him the time of day.”
No matter how hard I searched my memory, I had none of a guy named Jared in my Art History class freshman year. Or any memory of one asking me out at any point.
“I don’t even know who that is.”
She let out a humorless laugh. “You’re just proving my point, Lexi.”
“Lawson wouldn’t have liked you anyway.” I threw my hands up in frustration. Nora was clingy. Lawson hated clingy. There were so many things about Nora that he would’ve hated.
“You don’t know that. I met him at a Courting Chaos show once and there were sparks.”
But I did know. What I didn’t know was that she’d ever actually met Lawson. That was news to me and I’d bet my left tit that he had no memory and there’d been no fucking sparks.
Shaking my head, I knew the rest of this conversation would be awful. “Fuck you, Nora.” Then I ended the call.
That was the most ridiculous thing I’d ever heard.
18
Van
We were getting to stay in a hotel tonight. Something I appreciated more now that we were constantly on the move and sleeping on the bus. That wasn’t a complaint. I knew just how lucky Pushing Daisies was to get this opportunity. Hurricane’s ba
d luck had been our good. But with each day that passed, it was harder and harder to have Lexi on her bus and me on mine.
Though I couldn’t complain about that, either. Us being separate had meant that we’d spent a lot of time talking. I’d talked to Lexi more and about more things than probably all the women I’d had sex with total. Which didn’t look good on me, but that was how it was.
With Lexi, I wanted to know what was on her mind and how her day was going. I wanted to hear her voice, even when she was whispering to keep from disturbing Daisy and Lawson.
The thing I didn’t want to hear was when she’d be leaving. She’d mentioned it a couple of times, but I’d let it run past me as if I hadn’t heard it. If I had my way, she’d stay until it was time to go back to school. Even then, I only rationalized that she had to go back to school.
Who knew falling in love would mean wanting that person with you every second? Probably most of the world, but I hadn’t.
“Hey, can I ride with you?” Daisy called out as I was walking away from the bus. My bag was over my shoulder and she also had one she carried the same way. She had that bright red hair up in a bun and was wide awake.
“Of course,” I told her. As soon as she got to me, I slid an arm around her shoulders and we made our way to the car Mack had told me was waiting. Daltrey, Bonham, and Mack had already headed for the hotel. I thought I would be riding alone since Lexi had sent a message saying she was already there.
Once we were settled inside, Daisy said, “You should just apologize.”
I furrowed my brows, trying to think of what I could’ve done to her that needed an apology “For what?”
She rolled her eyes. “Not to me, dummy. To Lawson.”
“Fuck that guy.” I went back to staring out the window.
“See? That’s the problem.” She sighed. I was frustrating her and I knew it. “You two need to kiss and make up.”
“I’m not kissing that fucker.”
“Van,” she snapped. “He’s in my life and that’s not going to change. Not to mention he’s in Lexi’s life and that’s not going to change. You seem to like her. Do you really want to continue alienating her family?”
“I love her,” I told my sister. There wasn’t a moment of hesitation in admitting that to her.
“Even more reason for you and him to get along. I’ve already given him hell for the way he’s being about the two of you and now it’s your turn.”
There were some things I normally would’ve said to her about all that but this time I didn’t. She wasn’t wrong about Lawson being in both of their lives. Of course he was and I was going to be in both of their lives as well.
Gave me a lot of think about the rest of the ride to the hotel
The car stopped at our hotel and the two of us got out.
Before we went inside, Daisy took a deep breath and picked up where we’d left off in the car. “I love him and I don’t see that changing, Van. It’d be nice if my brother and my boyfriend didn’t hate each other. Even Mack has let up a bit.”
“Because he works with the guy every fucking day.”
“Maybe he just realized that Lawson is the right person for me.”
I snorted.
“He is,” she continued as if I hadn’t made a sound. “And I’d really hate to have to tie you both to a tree until you start to get along.”
I burst out into a laugh as I followed her inside the hotel.
That was something Mom had done to Daltrey and Mack when we were kids. They’d had a power struggle going on as kids and they’d fight a lot. Sometimes physical. Mom had gotten fed up one day and tied the two of them to a tree until they’d promised not to fight anymore.
It was the last time one of them had hit the other, as far as I knew.
“I’ll give it a try, but I’m not apologizing for looking out for you,” I told her more seriously. “That’s my job as your brother.”
She nodded. “Yeah. I get that and appreciate it, but part of looking out for me is realizing that I get to make my own decisions the same as you. Do you think I’ve loved knowing who you were hooking up with in high school? No. Did it sometimes affect how people treated me? Yes. Still, I gave you shit, but not like this.”
“Wait.” I stopped walking. “People gave you shit because of who I was having sex with?”
She nodded. “There was one girl who got mad at me because you wouldn’t hook up with her.”
“Who was that?”
“It’s not important.” She leaned in closer. “Just make nice for both my sake and Lexi’s. You’ll thank me later.”
Daisy had given me advice before and the only times she’d told me I’d thank her later, I’d literally thanked her later. She’d been right.
I still wasn’t going to apologize.
After getting my room key from Mack, even though I had no intention of staying in the room with Bonham, I sought out Lexi. But she wasn’t in the lobby and when I sent a text, she didn’t answer immediately. Then I looked for Barrett. She’d probably know where Lexi was.
Found her. Shaking her head at Ransom, which I noticed she did a lot.
“Hey, Barrett,” I said as I approached the two of them.
“Oh, thank god,” Ransom said, sounding super relieved. “You’ve saved me.”
Barrett snorted. “He’s saved you from nothing.” Then to me, she added, “What’s up?”
“Have you seen Lexi?”
“Yeah. I gave her the room key. Room two-thirty if you’re interested, but I don’t think she went up there yet. I’ve been right here by the elevators since before they arrived and she hasn’t passed by.”
“Thanks.” I turned to walk away, but she said the thing I didn’t want to hear to my back.
“Lawson probably knows where she is, though.”
Ransom laughed as I cringed. “You’re a troublemaker.”
“I am not,” she countered. “They’re grown men. They can figure it out.”
Which meant Lexi had probably talked to her about the situation as well. Though everyone would’ve known I had a problem with Lawson. I hadn’t kept that a secret.
Ignoring her, I checked my phone as I got as far away from those two as I could.
Still no message, but as I held it, the thing almost vibrated out of my hand and Lexi’s smiling face was looking up at me. It was about time.
“Hey,” I answered.
“Sorry. I was talking to my sister and didn’t realize you’d messaged.”
“That’s fine. I’m just wondering where you want me to drop my bags.”
“Ha. Like that’s a serious question. You’re staying with me, right?”
Now it was my turn to grin like a fool. “That’s what I want but didn’t want to assume.”
“Assume. I just went walking around while I was talking to her,” she told me. “My bag is over with Lawson. I’ll be back in like five minutes, grab it, then we can figure out what to do with our day.”
“I know exactly what I’d like to do with the day.”
Her soft giggle in my ear told me she knew what I wanted to do too and wasn’t opposed.
“Be there in a sec,” she said and then ended the call.
Fuck. Her bag was with Lawson and I’d had the fleeting idea to grab it for her. Well, I guessed I needed to man-up, as Daisy had told me, and go get it.
Lawson was standing alone off to the side, tapping away on his iPad. No idea what the managers did for the most part, even Mack, and I didn’t care. I just wanted to get my girl’s bag.
“Hey,” I said when I approached him.
Everything about him tensed. I’d done that and now I was kind of feeling bad about it. Not enough to apologize because I hadn’t done anything wrong. I was looking out for my kid sister.
“What do you want?”
“Lexi’s bag.” I pointed at the duffle at his feet. “She’s on her way back here and I’d like to get it for her.”
“Back here?” he asked. “From wher
e?”
“She said she was walking around while talking to your sister.”
He shook his head. “She can get it when she gets here.”
“What the fuck, man? I just want to take it up to her room for her.”
“I don’t think so.” He finally looked up from the tablet. “You’ve been taking this too far, Van. You got me back. Great. I know what it’s like to have someone I don’t like dating my sister. But you’re taking this too far. Her feelings are getting involved and she’s going to hurt. Then I’m going to have to hurt you.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “You mean you’d try to hurt me. It wouldn’t work.”
“We’ll see.”
“I’m not fucking with her, Lawson. I’m not doing anything to get you back or make you feel my pain. You said you feel that already. I won’t apologize for that.”
“That still doesn’t explain what you’re doing with Lexi.”
“Look.” I took two steps toward him so that everyone around us wouldn’t be able to listen in on our little conversation. They were already a good distance away, but I wanted to be sure. “I have all kinds of tingling feelings for your sister. I’m not fucking with her. I wouldn’t.”
His eyes closed and his jaw clenched. Now I had no idea why because I hadn’t said anything that should’ve pissed him off.
“Yeah, I know exactly what those tingling feelings are. I’ve got them for your sister but keep them the fuck away from my sister.”
“There’s not a chance of that happening unless Lexi tells me she wants me to go away.” I let a cocky half-grin cross my face. “And from what I can tell, that isn’t happening anytime soon. I hope it doesn’t happen ever.”
“Jesus Christ, Van. I swear if you hurt her—”
“I won’t,” I told him quickly. This was as good a truce as we were going to get.
“Here.” He leaned down and snatched her bag off the floor then handed it to me. It was almost like we’d signed a treaty or something. This was going to give Lexi and Daisy a lot less stress.
Van (Pushing Daisies Book 2) Page 14