The grand vision ended as abruptly as it had begun. I looked about in confusion, having completely forgotten where I was. The Papuan natives still stood around me in a circle, watching me. I tried to say something, but I could form no words. I sensed that my hands were trembling, and I looked down at them. Without knowing it, at some point I had clenched them into fists and in the process had pulled handfuls of clay loose from the large lump. Raw scratches could be seen on my palms where my unkempt fingernails had torn the skin. I opened my fists and gazed at the clay I had pulled loose. Before my eyes it disappeared as it was absorbed through my skin into my body.
As if they understood that my mind had been overcome with more splendorous sights than most men had ever seen in a lifetime, the natives lifted me to my feet and guided me back to my hut.
For much of the afternoon I lay naked upon the floor, trying without appreciable success to force my mind to function as it should. At last I recovered enough to sit up and attempt to write the details of my experiences.
I am now more determined than ever to learn what I can of this Lamotelokhai, but I must be more cautious. It is quite possible that learning of its extraordinary properties too quickly could drive a man to utter madness.
12
April 28, 1868
Much has happened in the four days since I last wrote. In order to simplify the telling, I will first describe my progress with the Lamotelokhai, followed by some pertinent observations of the nature of the tribe to which I now seem to be inextricably bound.
I continue to get the sense that these natives regard my work with the Lamotelokhai as something of importance to them. They have taken me to it every day, as if this were integral to some schedule only they are privy to. It should not be long before I can ask them to explain this, as I am quickly learning the basics of their language, a task greatly facilitated by my new and extraordinary gift of recollection.
I was again taken to the Lamotelokhai on the day following my last notebook entry. The natives carried their spears, however they did not use them for coercion, as I knew precisely what to do and was quite willing. I had carefully formulated some questions for the object in such a way that I would not again be overcome by an onslaught of bewildering visions. Or so I had hoped.
Again on my knees, naked, and surrounded by Papuan observers, I wasted no time. I placed my hands upon the lump of clay, resulting in a vision of several hundred of the strange figures. I ignored them and asked my first question.
“Are you what the natives here call Lamotelokhai?”
Before I could prepare myself for what I knew would come next, I had already been transported to a rocky shore beside the sea. Immediately my senses were nearly overpowered by the stiff ocean breeze, the sounds of waves striking the shore, and the smell of salt water and rotting aquatic plants among the rocks. Several Papuan men stood before me, but they did not seem to see me, and I watched them as if I were an invisible phantom. One of them I recognized to be Matiinuo, although he was without his white feathers. Other than that, he appeared much as he does today, with youthful skin and clear eyes. However, the men with him were in a far worse state, showing the usual ravages of uncivilized life. They appeared to suffer from starvation and perhaps other privations, their ribs and knee bones clearly outlined by withered and contorted skin. Thick effluence seeped from their blood-shotten eyes, which were sunken within their sockets. Matiinuo and his companions gazed down at something on the ground. It was the Lamotelokhai, somewhat misshapen in order to conform to the rocks and sand upon which it rested. Matiinuo reached for it, pulled loose a handful, and gave a portion of it to each of his companions. After some little hesitation they ate their portions. They continued gazing at the clay for a time, and then Matiinuo spoke to the men.
“Khakhul-fekho lép-telo. Alümon-fekho khil-telo. Nu be khomilo-n-din-da. If-é lelua laléo ganggail khendil. If-é laléo umo nu é-fu. If-é laléo mekho nu damo. If-é laléo mekho gekhené damo. Nokhu-lekhé laimekho if-é lop, laléo-tekhé damo-nu lefül abül yu la-khe-bené fa-lu-lo khendil. Ati-lo, Lamotelokhai. Nu laléo-fi alip Lamotelokhai.”
My translation (added when transcribing this notebook):
“Today you are ill. Tomorrow you will be healthy. It is impossible that you die. This clay is a spirit with much magic power. This spirit talks to me when I sleep. This spirit put knowledge (information) into me. This spirit will also put knowledge into you. We must take this clay into the forest and hide it, because the spirit has told me that in time someone will come and take away this magic. When they take away this magic, the world will end. I will name this spirit Lamotelokhai.”
The vision ended, and I was back in the village, blinking my eyes and trying to hold my balance, as even the briefest of such visions was staggering to behold. I had not understood all of Matiinuo’s words in the vision, but it did seem clear that I was being shown that he had indeed given the object the name, Lamotelokhai.
However, I had not anticipated that a seemingly simple question would result in such an overpowering vision. Upon contemplating my next question, I decided that even more caution would be wise.
“What is my name?”
Before I had even spoken the complete sentence, I was transported back to my hut, at the precise time when I had introduced myself to Matiinuo and Sinanie. Again I was gazing at the two men, afraid and uncertain of their intentions. And again I put my hand to my chest and spoke my name. “Samuel.”
This time, when the vision ended, I recovered more quickly, perhaps because this vision had been brief. Perhaps also because it was a scene that was familiar to me, or because it was a question for which I already knew the answer.
I considered for a moment that these two visions had begun before I had even completed my questions. I had no ideas for how this could be possible, but I realized that perhaps I did not need to speak my questions aloud at all. Thus I formulated my next question only in my mind, mentally saying the words as I often do when I read to myself.
“Are you a living organism, or are you some manner of machine?”
I steadied myself to endure the vision, in case this new method had the same effect, and then it was upon me. I suddenly found myself hovering in the air in a vast chamber, with white luminous walls far in the distance. All manner of apparatuses and machines filled the chamber. Some of them were small, while others were as large as a house. Some of them were built with obvious solid, mechanical parts, while others seemed to be filled with various liquids. The entire chamber bustled with the industrious activity of hundreds of the strange three-legged creatures I had seen in my dream. The creatures moved about with apparent purpose around the apparatuses. It seemed to me to be a factory of some kind, although there was not a single item of machinery for which I had any idea of its purpose.
I then flew through the open air of the chamber until I was near one of the walls, which bulged outward as if the chamber were a huge flattened bubble. Near the wall was a white structure that was larger than most of the other machines. It was irregularly shaped and rounded, such that there were no corners or straight edges, and its tallest rounded bulge was perhaps thirty feet high. At one end of the structure, dozens of the creatures were gathered as if waiting for something to happen.
As I drew nearer, I saw that something was indeed happening. There was a round opening in the structure, and the white walls around the opening moved of their own accord as if made of pliable India rubber. The entire flexible perimeter of the opening contracted, causing the hole in the center to be pushed away from the main body of the structure. Oddly, this looked to me like the anus of a gigantic white earthworm, with muscles contracting in an attempt to push out a particle of waste. And just as this somewhat revolting thought occurred to me, an object did indeed appear from the opening. There was no mistaking the object. It was a large lump of clay, the Lamotelokhai, or one of the thousands like it I had seen in my dream. Before the object fell to the floor, the nearest of the three-legged creatures
held out a thin tray beneath it. At that moment I realized for the first time that, in addition to having two legs in the rear and one very slender leg near the head, these creatures also had two small, frail-looking arms, attached to the body on either side of the anterior slender leg. Holding the tray out with one of its diminutive hands, the creature accepted the clay, and somehow the tray supported it, notwithstanding the fact that the large lump appeared to be far too heavy. The creature then carried the clay, balanced upon the small tray, away to some unknown destination. I watched as another lump was pushed from the opening and carried off in a similar way by another of the creatures, and then another after that.
The vision ended, and I caught myself before falling over onto the ground at the feet of the observing natives. This last vision had been more than I had bargained for, and I feared that this day’s session with the Lamotelokhai might come to an early end, as there seemed to be a limit as to how many of these mesmerizing visions my mind could endure before becoming utterly dazed and useless. I contemplated what I had seen as I becalmed myself. I was still confused regarding my question. I had witnessed these objects being produced in a place I had believed to be a factory, but the actual process of their final stage of creation had seemed oddly natural and animal-like. Nevertheless, it was clear that the three-legged creatures had supervised their production and were ultimately responsible for what became of them afterwards.
Before long I had recovered my balance and wits sufficiently as to increase my confidence, which then caused me to set aside my previous determination to be cautious. In my excitement, I desired to learn more of these strange creatures that seemed capable of hitherto unimagined feats. I hastily expressed a new request in my mind without speaking it aloud.
“In my visions I have seen a strange world. Upon this world were creatures, moving about within towers that reached beyond the sky. And I saw these creatures laboring in a factory, producing objects such as that which I now touch with my hands. I would like to learn more about these creatures.”
This proved to be a grave mistake, as I had forgotten to ask only questions of a very specific nature, which would have limited the scope of the Lamotelokhai’s response. However, it was too late. My mind was flooded with visions so grand and numerous that I could not possibly comprehend it all. There were visions of every intricate detail of the external and internal anatomy of the three-legged creatures. Their bodies were so foreign to my understanding that I had no choice but to allow the scenes to flash by me without the slightest comprehension. I had somewhat more success with visions regarding social matters. There were examples of relations between individuals and groups, some of them more complex than I had thought possible. There were scenes of rituals, official proceedings, administering of justice, educating the young and old alike, social gatherings, means of determining consensus among large populations in order to make important decisions, and activities in which they engaged for amusement. There were visions of artistic achievements and endeavors of enterprise and industry. And there was much more, but I could only endure the smallest fragment of it before my mind began to fail, and then I was aware of only occasional pieces of these lessons. I became terrified that the flood of visions would never stop, and I fell into the grip of panic. Just when I was at the thin edge of my sanity, the visions stopped. I was only scarcely aware that I had fallen to the ground, and I could provide no assistance to the natives as they dragged me to my hut and hoisted my weakened and useless body up to it.
For what seemed like many hours I lay upon the floor staring at the rafters, unable to sleep and yet unable to shape my thoughts to any useful purpose. This condition persisted the rest of the day and through the night. On several occasions I soiled myself. I was unable to prevent it and likewise was unable to command my body to even roll away from it.
Sinanie and two other men entered my hut some time after the sun had come up. They kindly cleaned my body and the floor, and they dragged me a few feet to the side. They forced me to drink water from a gourd. This seemed to help, because after they went away I slept tranquilly.
When I awoke it was late in the afternoon, and I realized that I felt much better. I got to my feet and paced about the hut, as my body had become bruised from lying motionless upon the bamboo floor. It occurred to me that the only thing that had prevented my passing into complete madness, or perhaps even dying, was that I had fallen upon the ground, thus releasing my hold upon the Lamotelokhai and terminating the visions. However, I had learned many things from those visions, notwithstanding the fact that I had absorbed only a small fraction of what was being shown to me. I now had a great deal of knowledge of the three-legged creatures, the creators of the Lamotelokhai. I found the particulars of the structure and function of their bodies to be altogether bewildering, as I could make little sense of what I had seen. However, it was the nature of their society that most interested me.
I have lived my life in the greatest civilized society in the world. However, the most educated men, with whom I dare to include myself, would argue that we have not yet come close to what we imagine to be the epitome of social progress. This “perfect social state” that we imagine involves equality of all members of society, with respect to wealth and opportunities to pursue that which brings pleasure and comfort to each individual. Such equality is so easily imagined, and yet it is so difficult to achieve. This, I am sure, is due to aspects of our “civilized” society that many have struggled so hard to establish and therefore would struggle equally to preserve. Perhaps the most obvious aspect is the accumulation of wealth. It is the dream of many men to accumulate wealth in order to rise above the general population, to be considered wealthy, and to claim the property and privileges that accompany that title. However, the reality is that this leads to great inequality, as only a few can achieve such wealth, while the vast majority must suffer in ways too numerous to count.
During the agonizing minutes in which I had witnessed visions of the three-legged creatures’ society, one thing was made clear to me, that those creatures had achieved a level of equality of which modern men can only dream. Each individual creature was free to pursue activities, occupations, and professions that most interested him, often changing professions at will as his interests progressed over time. Every achievement, including construction of the vast towers and the tunnels in the sky, was for the good of the entire population, and was accomplished because there were sufficient numbers of individuals interested in making it so. Every individual enjoyed the same rights and privileges and had access to what he needed in order to live in good health and happiness. There seemed to be no expectation of, nor any great yearning for, accumulation of wealth beyond that of any other individual.
It is my belief that the progression of any group of people begins with a state of pure savagery, which then, given suitable time and resources, gradually progresses to agriculture and industry, with the inevitable result of accumulated wealth for the few and suffering of the many. But my belief extends beyond this arguably inadequate state of society, as such a civilization will surely crumble if it does not eventually progress to a state of equality for all individuals such as I have witnessed in my visions.
Having myself come from a family of some wealth, this may seem to be an argument rife with hypocrisy and contrary to my station in life. However, I am only one of many educated and cultured men who believe this to be the highest state of civilization, and I would be quite willing to redistribute my share of my family’s resources if only the great civilization of England were upon the verge of such enlightened transformation. Sadly, though, I fear that the realization of such change will not occur during my brief lifetime, as there are far too many wealthy men in England who do not share this vision.
Although I shall not live to see such a future as this, I am much encouraged to have witnessed evidence that it is quite possible to achieve.
For the remainder of that day I slowly recovered my strength by pacing about while furt
her contemplating the bewildering visions that had nearly killed me. Sinanie came to my hut with another man, whom he introduced as Ahea. Like the other men I had seen, Ahea wore a gourd upon his sexual organ. Other than that and a few braided cords around his neck, the only adornment he wore was a headdress made of the fur of a mammal, perhaps a cuscus. At first I feared these men had come to take me to another of my sessions with the Lamotelokhai, for which I certainly was not ready—at least not yet. Instead they placed sago paste and water on the floor before me and then watched in silence as I consumed them.
It wasn’t until yesterday, April 27, that I was again taken to the Lamotelokhai. The natives did not seem to care that my previous encounter with it had been so costly to my mental wellbeing. As before, after bringing out the Lamotelokhai and setting it beside me, they stood around me and waited for whatever might happen next. However, I had determined to avoid further harm, and upon placing my hands on the lump of clay I silently expressed my first request.
“Lamotelokhai, I would like to learn from you in ways that do not involve placing visions into my mind. I beg you to show me no more visions, for I am too feeble to endure them!”
I waited, not knowing if such a request would be granted or even understood. The only thing that happened was that the strange figures floating before my eyes disappeared. I concluded that this was the Lamotelokhai responding to my desperate request, and so I proceeded as I had planned.
Diffusion Box Set Page 95