by W. J. May
Rae had always wondered why, when the PC was the ‘superior’ agency, many men and women still chose to align themselves with the Knights. Now she knew.
There were no secrets here. No abilities that people had to hide. Hybrids were hybrids out in the open. Not that there were many, but people like Kyo were lauded, not despised. The families of each of the agents knew exactly what they were, and what they were doing—whether they had a tatù or not. Luke was technically an agent himself, though not marked. Devon had mentioned at one point last night that Luke actually had an older brother who was the one with the ink. There was a spirit of inclusion with the Knights that Guilder had always lacked. A feeling of long-term sustainability, a contentedness that resided in the hearts of the agents rather than in their performance record.
In a way, it’s exactly what she and Devon had always talked about. Had always been hoping for. A place where they could be who they were and love who they wanted, while still serving the cause. It was a reform they’d always hoped the Council would one day adopt, but knew, deep down, would never come to pass.
“Rae!” Julian trotted over the moment he saw her, drawing the eyes of several curious agents before they resumed their training. The second he made it across the grass, he took her by the shoulder and looked her up and down. “Hey! How are you feeling?”
His arm was still in a sling and the bruises on his face had yet to heal, but there was something different about him today. His skin was flushed and his eyes were sparkling with the excitement of something Rae could only describe as ‘proactive motion.’ They were finally doing something. They had finally broken through the barrier and were moving forward as one.
She smiled and gestured down to herself, wincing only slightly when she pulled against the stitches still holding her stomach together. “You know me, never better. Ready to go.”
His dark eyes met hers with a faint smile. “You forget—I do know you. How are you feeling?”
She hesitated, eyes sweeping the field. “Where’s Devon?” she asked, dodging the question.
Julian followed her gaze, resting on Angel for a moment—who was demonstrating a lethal flying kick—before turning back to Rae. “I don’t know. He didn’t come out with the rest of us. I assumed he was with you.”
Rae tapped her foot nervously, growing more and more anxious by the moment. She couldn’t shake the look on his face the other day. The way he kept murmuring, ‘he’s too powerful,’ almost to himself. She knew Devon was taking this personally, but she was starting to worry he was taking ‘personally’ to a whole other level. To a dark, internal place she couldn’t follow.
“Could you check for me?” she asked. “I’m a little…could you just check?”
She didn’t make Julian do this sort of thing very often. It was an invasion of privacy that he had long ago sworn to avoid whenever possible. But until she got her hands on Ellie’s boyfriend’s handy tracking ability, she’d still need a little help. As it stood, she had no trouble whatsoever invading someone’s privacy if she thought there might be a good reason behind it.
Julian studied her face for a moment. “Sure.”
Extending his good arm slightly to keep his balance, his eyes faded out to white. He began to sway in the gentle breeze and Rae automatically took his hand to keep him centered.
The first time she’d seen him do this, it had scared the shit out of her. He looked almost like a ghost. A handsome ghost, perfect in every way, except for his creepy, white eyes. Now, she was so used to it that she barely noticed the change. It was simply another part of him. Something as natural as breathing or thought.
But whatever Julian was seeing, he certainly didn’t like it. His forehead creased in concentration, and even before he snapped back into the present, he was already starting to frown. “I don’t know… I can’t see him.”
Rae dropped his hand in alarm. “What do you mean, you can’t see him?”
“It’s nothing like that,” Julian said quickly, still a bit distracted as he tried to re-center. “He’s deliberately keeping me out. Deliberately not making any pre-meditated decisions I can follow.”
Rae took a step back, impressed in spite of herself. “Is that even possible?”
Julian rolled his eyes with a long-suffering sigh. “You’d be surprised. He figured out how to do it when we were stationed together your senior year. I was having trouble controlling the frequency of my visions, not seeing everything about everyone, and he was determined to keep some things private. Mainly…you.”
Yeah…I bet he wanted to keep that private.
A little grin flashed across Rae’s face as she thought about what it must have been like. Julian and Devon sitting in one of a hundred nameless hotel rooms, in one of a hundred nameless countries. Jules—trying like mad to keep his visions under control. Devon—trying like mad to figure out a way to outfox him so he could keep on secretly dating Rae.
As if Julian didn’t already know.
“Anyway, it’s certainly not easy, but if anyone can do it, he can.” Julian’s eyes flickered back to the training group, following along. He looked annoyed, but not worried, and his confidence set Rae’s mind at ease. Just to make sure, he glanced back. “Rae, it takes an insane amount of concentration to do it. He couldn’t keep it up if he was in trouble or something. He just wants some space.”
She nodded quickly. Reassured, but having no intention whatsoever of giving him that space. “Thanks, Jules.” She gestured to the lawn. “Looking good out there.”
“Yeah,” he snorted sarcastically, “the sling really helps.”
“You’ll be out of it soon.” With a little wave, she started heading back inside to see if Molly had any idea where her missing boyfriend had made off to. But before she shut the door, Julian called out to her once more.
“Rae…” his voice softened, “you know we’ll all be out of this soon. All of us.”
Their eyes met and she forced a smile.
“I know we will.”
He flashed a sad grin and shook his head. “You forget again…”
“I know…” she pushed open the door and headed inside, “…you know me.”
Molly’s room was actually just a few doors down from Rae’s, and Rae had no doubt that she’d find her there. While she’d been delighted to see the rest of the PC and Knights mixed in and working together, Molly had been inexplicably determined to avoid such activities since they got to the compound. She certainly wouldn’t be going out today.
That’s why Rae was so surprised when she went inside.
Molly was dressed exactly like she was: head to toe black. Her crimson hair was swept up into a long ponytail, and when Rae came in she was just pulling on her old combat boots.
“Morning,” she said briskly. The bed was still messy, and a plate of uneaten fruit was shoved into the far corner of her desk. But other than that, she looked like she was ready to go. A bit nervous, perhaps. But a bit of the old Molly coming back. A force to be reckoned with.
“Morning,” Rae answered with scarcely contained delight. “Looks like someone woke up on the right side of the bed this—”
“I’m pregnant.”
The world went black.
When Rae managed to open her eyes again, she was lying on her back. Molly’s face floated over her, a mixture of concern and amusement all at the same time.
“Honestly, Kerrigan, only you would black out when I tell you that I’m—”
“You’re pregnant?” Rae repeated in shock, sitting up and taking Molly’s hands.
For a moment, Molly’s determined show of force fractured, and a glimpse of the same bubbly girl who once set fire to her own ill-equipped closet leaked on through.
“Yeah, I am. About six weeks along.” Her tiny shoulders trembled as she pulled in a shaky breath. “I found out…well, I found out the day we got here. Dr. Roscoe figured it out during my examination and told me when I woke up.”
Rae brought her hands up to her mouth in
shock. She couldn’t even imagine. Waking up strapped to a bed in your enemy’s infirmary—not knowing if the rest of your friends were alive or dead—only to learn that you and your boyfriend, who apparently lived here with his dad, who was apparently the chief, were expecting an unexpected child.
“Oh, Molls…”
What could she even say? She could not imagine. And even as she sat there, a thousand little things began to make sense.
“You didn’t want to get involved in the politics or go back to Guilder,” she said softly, piecing it together right there on the floor. “You didn’t want to train.”
“More than that,” Molly whispered, “I didn’t want to use my tatù. I didn’t know whether it would hurt the baby. A thousand volts of electricity coursing through my body…what if I killed it?” A stream of steady tears slipped down her face, an expression mirrored quickly by Rae.
“You wanted me to sell the penthouse so you could have the money to buy a safe place for you and the baby. One that no one knew about.”
Molly nodded bravely, but then she covered her face with her hands, sobbing. “Oh Rae, I didn’t know how to tell you! I don’t know how to tell Luke! I don’t even know what I’m doing here! We had everything figured out and then we got fired, and shot at by our friends, and we didn’t have jobs, and we ended up here, and Luke’s dad turned out to be—” She lost her voice completely and started sobbing into her hands. “I don’t know what to do!”
The next second, the two friends came together, wrapping their arms around each other as they rocked back and forth on the floor. Rae cried silently, overwhelmed for her friend, while Molly openly sobbed, burying her head in Rae’s shoulder as a week’s worth of terror and frustration came pouring out.
“I don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl!” she finally choked. “I don’t even know how I’m going to decorate the nursery!”
With a gasping laugh Rae pulled away, holding Molly at an arm’s length as she looked her up and down. A fresh feeling of conviction surged through her, and with a steady smile she wiped her friend’s cheeks and looked her squarely in the eyes. “You, Molly Skye, are going to be the world’s best mother.”
Molly’s eyes locked onto hers, still swimming in tears. “Do you really think so?”
“There’s not a doubt in my mind.” On this point, Rae was certain. “We’re going to keep you out of harm’s way while we figure this whole mess out, and then, Molls, you’re going to have the most perfect little baby on the planet. You and I will raise it together. Like we always planned. We’ll move to Australia and become shepherds or something. Somewhere far away from here. The baby can play with the lambs. It’ll look like a billboard for infant PETA.”
A little giggle escaped Molly’s lips and she leaned back against the bed, gathering together her thoughts as she slowed down her frantic breathing. “Too many snakes in Australia.”
“Austria, then. They’re spelled almost the same.”
Another giggle. “It’s a plan.”
Rae smiled and squeezed her ankle. “Seriously, though…when are you going to tell Luke?”
“Today,” Molly said suddenly. “Or tomorrow. Or maybe never. I haven’t decided. Maybe I could just send him a postcard from Austria.”
Rae nodded patiently. “Why don’t we try…today?”
Molly bit her lip. She glanced fearfully out the window as the sounds of Luke and the training exercise filtered through. Then her hand drifted up to her stomach, and she cleared her face with sudden determination. “Tomorrow.”
Rae hesitated, willing to support whatever she decided but trying to keep her on course. “Why tomorrow?”
In a blur of crimson and black, Molly got to her feet. “Because today I’m going to be training.”
Rae scrambled up after her delighted, but anxious all at the same time. “Okay, well that’s…but I mean, you have a point about your tatù. Are you sure it’s—”
“Dr. Roscoe told me first thing that my ability won’t affect my baby, especially because it’s likely that my baby will have the same one. I’ve just been freaked about the idea.”
A sudden image of a fire-bolt-wielding infant lit both of their faces with a smile.
“Maybe you should name it Zeus…” Rae said pensively.
Molly’s eyes lit up. “I thought of that.”
“At any rate,” she paced a few steps forward and wrapped Molly up in another hug, “this is going to be one-hundred-percent okay. Nothing is going to happen to you or your kid. You guys are going to have a long, normal, boring life together. I promise.”
“Thanks, Rae.” Molly’s voice was somewhat muffled in her waves of raven hair.
“And I’m proud of you.”
She felt Molly smile. “Thanks.”
With that, she swept towards the door like a woman on a mission, keeping a hand on her stomach and her eyes trained on the horizon. Rae watched her go with a secret smile. The surprises just kept coming, but this, at least, was something they could celebrate.
Molly was almost out the door when she turned around with a last, sudden fear.
“And…” her blue eyes widened like saucers, “and the nursery?”
“We can paint it yellow. Yellow is neutral.”
“Right.” She nodded to herself, taking more solace in this one tiny detail than in anything else. “It is.”
The door swung shut behind her, leaving Rae feeling like she’d just experienced the entire range of human emotions all in a two-minute sitting. Leave it to Molly to do it all in one breath.
And leave it to Molly to rise above an impossible situation and come out on the other side even stronger. She’d seen Molly Skye do a number of inconceivable things over the years, but she didn’t know if she had ever been so proud.
She was still smiling when she suddenly realized that she hadn’t asked Molly the only question she’d come in here to say. Too late to do it now; it was hardly appropriate anyway, under the circumstances. She’d just have to find Devon the old-fashioned way.
As if on cue, her phone buzzed suddenly in her pocket. It was a text from Julian.
Just got a read on Devon. He’s back at the house.
Perfect! Then I’ll just head over there and…
Then Julian’s words from before echoed suddenly through her mind: ‘It takes an insane amount of concentration. He couldn’t keep it up if he was in trouble.’
A chilling question wedged its way to the front of her brain.
Why was Julian able to see him now?
Rae didn’t stop to answer any of a dozen greetings that were tossed her way as she raced across the lawn. She didn’t stop to tell Julian that she was borrowing his car before she conjured up the keys and threw it into gear. She didn’t stop at a single red light on her way back into the city.
Her mind was fixed on one thing and one thing only.
The chilling look on Devon’s face as he’d carried her away from the school.
She double-parked in the middle of the street and rushed up the front steps like her life depended on it, pounding loudly at the door. When there was no answer, she kicked the damn thing in—flying through the living room before suddenly stopping cold. Her heart froze up in her chest as her eyes focused on a single thing.
An empty syringe lying on the floor.
And Devon’s body lying beside it.
Chapter 12
Rae didn’t scream this time. There were no wasted words, no empty tears. When she looked back later, she thought that a part of her might have almost been expecting it.
“Devon,” she gasped as she rushed to his side, shaking him gently. He winced a little in pain, but other than that his eyes stayed closed. “Devon, you’ve got to wake up.”
Her eyes flicked from the empty needle lying on the floor, to the series of punctures and tiny bruises hidden in the crook of his arm.
“Sweetheart, please,” she begged, tilting him up slightly so that his head was in her lap. “Please wake up for me.
”
Still nothing.
How did this happen?! How did I let this happen?!
Rae didn’t need a doctor to tell her what was going on. She didn’t need to be a genius to know that the syringe hadn’t been full of penicillin or heroine. She knew exactly what was in the empty vial. She knew exactly what secret Devon had been keeping from her all this time.
Her hands flitted uselessly over him as she tried to think of what to do. Her first thought was to call an ambulance, but not even the Privy Council hospital would have any idea what to do. Her next thought was to call Carter, but what would he do besides sit here with her?
No. Devon had gotten himself into this mess. Devon would just have to pull himself out of it. And all Rae could do was sit here on the kitchen floor and hold his hand until that happened.
Seconds stretched into minutes and slowly stretched into a full hour.
Despite her resolution not to cry, a small river of tears had fallen down Rae’s face. About five minutes in, she’d conjured him a blanket. His skin was icy cold, and even in his sleep he’d begun shivering. Five minutes after that, she took it back off again. A vicious fever settled upon him suddenly, flushing his body as a thin layer of sweat broke out over his forehead.
In the end all she could do was sit there and keep her fingers wrapped tightly around his wrist, monitoring his weak, sporadic pulse.
After what seemed like a small eternity, his hand twitched. His pulse sped up slightly as his forehead pulled together with a soft groan.
“Devon?” she whispered tentatively, squeezing his fingers.
He didn’t reply. Maybe he couldn’t. Maybe he couldn’t even hear her. But his pulse quickened even more as his eyelids fluttered open and shut.
The second they were fully open, she hit him right in the face.
Hard.
“Rae!” he gasped, bringing a shaking hand up to his cheek. “What are you—”
She smacked him again, ignoring the accompanying stab of guilt that followed when he turned his face protectively into her leg.