"If not her, then who? We all know you’re not going home alone," she said in the same, airy tone. "There are plenty of them out there looking to land the big prize."
"Oh, I'm a prize, am I?"
"You know it. The front man is always the big catch."
Dev thought about the cramped tour bus, how they didn't have hotel rooms and that they had to get on that damned bus soon anyway to start the trip to their next location. As he looked over the women, he was struck by the incredible sameness of their anonymous faces.
It just didn't seem worth the effort.
But Bug's next words came out of nowhere and shocked him sober.
"Why was it never me, Dev?" she murmured in a voice so low he had to strain to hear it over the chattering crowd.
He shot a look in her direction and was stunned to find that, despite the pink heat in her cheeks, her expression was dead serious. She cocked her head, waiting silently for his answer, but he could hardly form a complete thought because his head was still exploding from the question.
Maybe he was misunderstanding her.
“What do you mean?”
She looked away, focusing on some spot over his left shoulder. “Like, you slept with dozen…maybe hundreds of women. After gigs and parties, by the lake when we had bonfires. I was always around. Why was it never me?”
She was his best friend's litter sister. The pain-in-the-ass that trailed them wherever they went. But he looked into her blue eyes that were so much like Rory's but not like them at all. They were framed in a pretty, heart-shaped face that it felt like he was seeing for the first time. Her breasts plumped against her shirt with each rapid breath, and his own breath went shallow.
Dev couldn't deny that she was more enticing than any of those girls on the dance floor. And the look in her eye had him thinking thoughts he shouldn't. Thoughts about sucking those tightened nipples into his mouth and sliding his tongue over that delicious skin from her head to her toes and back up again.
He jerked his gaze away and caught sight of Rory at the bar. His insides went cold and the blood pounding in his cock ceased and desisted.
Rory had been a brother to him. There when he needed him more than anyone else on the planet.
“Never happen,” he muttered.
Bug winced like he’d slapped her, but he didn’t take it back. Instead, he poured himself another shot and sucked it down. Then, he banged the glass on the table, breaking the intimacy that still he him in its grip.
"Not because you aren’t sexy. But because you’re worth more than a one night stand, Bug, and I'm not a forever kinda guy."
Before she could say another word Dev pushed his way out of the booth and tried to lose himself in the crowd. But no matter how deep he pushed into the crush of dancers, he couldn't shake the niggling feeling that something had shifted between him and Bug.
And they might never get it back.
Chapter Three
“Never happen.”
Sure, he’d added some platitudes after that, but that had been his first reaction.
She slumped forward and rested her head in her hands.
Kill me now.
What the hell was the matter with her? Why couldn’t she just have kept her mouth shut the way she had the last decade or so?
She crowded further back into the booth, stomach roiling with embarrassment, disappointment and regret. She tried to convince herself that the liquor pushed her to say it, but that wasn’t the truth. Maybe the alcohol loosened her tongue, but she only asked what she'd been wondering forever. Something that had been weighing on her for years.
And he’d just walked away.
Sadness and embarrassment turned to a much-preferred anger.
How dare he?
Not only did he walk away, he’d completely dismissed her. She laid open a piece of her heart and he thought nothing of it. Surely, he owed her more than that? The list of things that she’d done for those boys was long and deep, from covering for them when they did something stupid, to helping them with schoolwork they had trouble with, to working for free on their gigs for years before they ever made a dime.
And he acted like she didn't matter. Surely he knew her heart was in her throat, or at least that her confidence would be shattered by his words?
But his reply had been nothing but a platitude. A cold comfort. One that didn’t dull the pain of having her heart ripped out.
Why did she have to open her big stupid mouth? She’d sat by silently for years while he dated every pretty girl in high school and never said a word. All of a sudden, she couldn’t hold it in anymore? At least she’d had him as her friend. Things were going to be all weird now, and she’d be lucky if he wanted to even hang out with her.
Miserable, she watched him flirt with a group of girls that circled around him like a pack of slutty vultures. Their hair was perfectly coiffed, their make-up expertly done, and their sleek shirts and jeans paired with spiked heels.
She kicked her sneakered feet against the metal pillar that held up the tabletop.
No wonder he only saw her as “Bug”. She was plain and boring, like a dumpy caterpillar. He was used to being surrounded by butterflies.
Quite simply, Dev Lachlan was out of her league. Always had been.
She'd been such a fool wasting years wanting and waiting for him to see what was in front of him all along. He’d seen it, and had decided to pass.
She had to face facts that, at the age of twenty-three, he would never want her. And if she didn’t let go of this silly pipedream, she was going to be a virgin forever. Waiting for the guy who was never going to come around.
She thought back to the moments right before she’d said it. The moments right before she’d asked him why he’d never picked her. He’d been looking at her with a strange expression. One she’d seen on his face, but never aimed at her. Sort of pained and needy. Sort of sexy. Like maybe he wanted her. Plain old Cheri “Bug” Galveston. He could say what he wanted, but some part of her knew he’d felt it, even for a fleeting second. The pull between them that she’d always felt.
She turned her attention back to the dance floor, a pleasant buzz sending a tingle through her. He was dancing with three women now, he in the center and the others running their hands over his muscled body. Only question was, would he pick one, or all three?
Something inside her snapped at the thought.
Fuck that.
She filled the shot glass and downed that one, and filled it again. There was a reason they called it liquid courage. And she was going to need it.
She wasn't going to let Dev Lachlan ignore her. Maybe she couldn't have him forever, but maybe…just maybe, if she had him just once, it would ease the fire in her belly and stiffen her wobbly knees whenever he was near her. Who knew? Maybe he’d wind up being crummy in bed after all.
A semi-hysterical chuckle bubbled from her lips as she sucked down another shot. It was a crazy thought, but stranger things had happened. Maybe if she had Dev, just once, she could finally move on and find someone who did really want her.
Dev whispered into one of the girl's ears, and they peeled away from the crowd, heading for the door.
With alcohol fueling her on, Bug stood and pushed her way to the door.
The chilly autumn air hit her, almost sobering her up. As she stepped outside and looked around, she realized they were already out of sight. She was about to give up and go back in, but she heard a noise coming from the alley next to the bar.
Self-righteous anger shot through her and, with her fists balled at her sides, she stomped to the entrance of the alley just in time to see that skank plastering herself all over Dev.
"Come on, baby, no reason to stay here," she was saying with a coy laugh. "I live right down the street."
"Excuse me," shouted Cheri.
Both their heads turned to her. Cheri's gut clenched again, but she was determined to get Dev's attention.
"You. Chippie. Go on home. I need to talk to
my friend right now."
The woman looked shocked and Cheri waited, full of dread, for Dev to overrule her. But he stood there, gaze shuttered, saying nothing.
"Who the hell are you?" demanded the woman.
"I’m the woman who is going to kick your ass if you don’t head out," Cheri growled. "Go on."
"Better go, sweetheart," said Dev finally, a puzzled look in his eyes now as he regarded Cheri. "Shoot me an email, and I'll send you some tickets for the next show."
The girl bit her lip and nodded.
"It was great meeting you, Dev."
"Same here." He gave her a little kiss on the cheek and the woman teetered on her heels as she walked past Cheri.
"Bitch," she hissed, just loud enough for Cheri to hear.
The second she rounded the corner, Dev leveled his gaze toward Cheri.
"What the fuck, Bug?"
"Cheri," she said, advancing on him, emboldened by the fact that he hadn’t fought for his latest conquest. Maybe that meant something. And so what if it didn’t? She was sick of pretending, and sick of not at least trying to get what she wanted. "My name is Cheri."
"Well, shit, I know th--"
She put her finger to his lips. "Say it," she murmured. “Cheri.” She pulled her finger away and waited.
"Cheri," he said softly.
"You’re an idiot."
"Why is that?" His confusion showed plainly in the harsh spotlight of the security light in the dank alley.
"Because you’re so blind. I get it Mr. Rock Star. I'm not pretty enough. I don't dress sexy enough."
Dev held up his hands.
"Whoa, B-, I mean Cheri. Where is this coming from all of a sudden?"
"It’s not all of a sudden. It’s our whole lives. You'll fuck anything else with a pulse. Except me!" Cheri righteous rage fueled by one too many shots of whiskey filled the little alley. “I have a right to know the truth. Why? And don’t give me that baloney about me being a forever girl or whatever. I’m not buying it. Care about me enough to say it like it is. Say that you don’t want me and we can drop the whole thing.”
She steeled herself for the words, her whole body tense. When they never came, she blinked back up at him. His head was lowered and he looked like someone suckered punched him.
"What do you want from me, Cheri?"
He didn’t say it.
He wouldn’t say he didn’t want her…which meant that there was still a chance.
Her pulse thrummed as she stepped closer. "I just want to wild. Free. Grown up, Dev. For one night. With you."
He flinched and then shook his head, his eyes growing wary. "Sex and friends is a bad mix. Trust me."
There it was. The "friend" kiss of death. Her heart plummeted to her toes as the word echoed in her head on auto-loop.
He wasn't going to go to bed with her, ever. Not because he wasn’t attracted to her, but because she’d been friend-zoned.
So figure out a way to get out of that zone and into another one, Jack Daniels whispered seductively in her ear.
It was like a revelation and, suddenly, an idea sparked in her alcohol-riddled brain. Another time she would have thought it a stupid one, but right now it seemed downright brilliant.
"Then give me lessons."
"What?"
"You don’t want me, and you want everyone. So there’s gotta be a reason why. I obviously need to step up my game. Give me lessons in how to get a guy. You know, how to dress, how to flirt, how to kiss?” She wet her lips and then let it rip. “I want to know how to bring a man like you to his knees."
He looked like she’d just hit him with a brick and she swallowed a semi-hysterical laugh.
"And why would you want that?" he asked, his voice sounding deeper…huskier than I’d ever heard it.
"Because I don't know how! Dev, you've known me half my life. Have you ever seen me with a steady boyfriend? Or even one who stuck around past one date?"
"No," he admitted.
"I just don’t have the skills to find and keep a guy’s attention. My mother was worthless, my father more so than her, and all I ever had was Rory. How was I supposed to learn man woman stuff from him?"
All true. But she didn't add the rest of it. That she was so hung up on Dev the whole time that she couldn't imagine being with anyone else.
Dev scratched his head and shook his head slowly. A feeling of heartache mixed with horror slid over her. He was going to turn her down.
Again.
But then rattling of air brakes shook the silent night and Bill leaned out of the bus fifty yards away.
"I told them we had to go, but they’re all dragging their feet. Round everyone up, you two," he shouted. "We need to make tracks if we are going to hit Alexandria soon."
They stared at each other for another long moment.
“I’m sorry, Bug,” Dev said, and then he headed back into the bar without looking back.
Her heart sank. Defeated, she scurried across the parking lot and climbed the steps of the second bus. She walked its length until she came to her bunk. Then, she flopped down in it, and buried her face in her pillow to hide her tears.
Two strikes and she already felt like she was out. He was never going to want to talk to her again. In fact, he was probably laughing to himself about it right now.
She let out a miserable groan and wished she had kept drinking. At least then she could pass out into oblivion for a while instead of living in this humiliation nightmare.
She didn't get to wallow in her self-pity long, though. Her travel-mates filed into the bus noisily. Gina pushed aside the curtain covering her bunk holding a laptop in her hand. Cheri sat up quickly and pushed herself into the darker corner to avoid her tear-stained face being seen.
"Forget something?" Gina asked with a grin.
Heat crept up Cheri’s cheeks. In her drunken pursuit of Dev, she forgot all about the laptop she left in the bar. Some Social Media Director she was.
"Wow, thanks, Gina. You're a life saver."
"You're lucky I recognized it before someone walked off with it."
"Yes, I am. I owe you."
"So why’d you run out of the place like your ass was on fire and leave it behind?"
Cheri sat there feeling even more like a total idiot, but her ability to mince words was clearly on hiatus after all those shots. "I ran out after Dev."
"Why?" said Gina, mystified.
Cheri sat there in awkward silence. How to tell this sharp, confident, put-together woman that a stupid, childhood-crush was ruining her life?
She remembered the day it had happened. She’d been desperately trying to learn how to ride a bike so she could keep up with the boys. Their home life was such a mess that teaching a kid how to ride a bike was the least of her parents’ concerns. And poor Rory was so intent on escaping some days, he barely noticed she was lagging behind on foot. She didn’t blame him. He’d taken the brunt of his father’s terrifying anger, and she was pretty sure riding away on that bike had been the only way he’d survived his childhood.
But Dev had paid attention. He’d seen her struggling and had slowed down to teach her himself.
That had been it. That was when she’d fallen head over heels for him.
Cheri shook her head at the memory of Dev drenched in that ridiculous male body spray that was supposed to make pubescent guys sexy as he held the handle bars and seat and helped her learn how to balance her weight on the bike.
Of course, she thought, with him being five years older that he was incredibly grown up. His voice was rich and deep, not like the boys of her class, and his muscles were rock hard from a summer of cutting lawns. He was like a super hero and she’d wanted to wrap her arms around him and never let go.
Some things never change.
“Is something going on between you two?” Gina asked, her brows caving into a puzzled frown.
"No," said Cheri, shoving aside the bittersweet memory and forcing a smile. "He's like a brother to me."
&
nbsp; "Uh huh," Gina said with disbelief in her voice. "Want to talk about it?"
"There's nothing to talk about." And there wasn’t. Dev had made sure of that.
Gina held up her hands. "Okay. I get it. None of my business. After the day we had, I need my beauty sleep anyway. I’ll leave you alone."
"Bug?" Bill strolled on the bus calling her name. "Bug!"
Cheri rolled her eyes. "I wish he'd stop calling me that."
“Everyone calls you that,” Gina said with a shrug.
"Only people I like," she muttered as she shoved herself to her feet and went to the kitchen area where Bill stood.
"Yes?"
"I'm not seeing the social media material up."
Gina crowded behind her. "Give her a break, Bill. The past two days have been hell. Everyone needed to blow off some steam."
"And we can't afford to let any of our promo efforts slack. Wasn't you who told me that we needed to get our social media stuff up by five AM to hit the morning before work lookers?”
"No. What I said," replied Gina, "was that we can optimize our traffic by posting then, but that the spread of readership goes all day long."
Bill shrugged. "Same difference."
"I planned to get the stuff up tonight, so no harm, no foul, okay?" Cheri said.
Bill nodded but clearly didn't look satisfied.
"Oh, and Bill?" said Gina, "you seem to have forgotten our per diem again. From now on if you can get it to us each day without asking, and earlier in the day? So we actually have the money to spend?"
Annoyance spread on Bill's face. "I give it to you when I can get to a bank."
"Well, this shit about getting it in a lump sum sucks. If you are going to do that, give it to us at the beginning of the week, not at the end."
"I'll see what I can do."
Bill hopped off the bus and Cheri and Gina glared after him.
"Smug bastard," said Gina.
Cheri agreed, and gave her new friend a smile of thanks for having her back. She’d come out strong for her twice in less than ten minutes by grabbing her laptop and running interference with Bill. Cheri made a mental note to return the favor ASAP.
Hard Lesson: A bad-boy, rock star romance Page 3