Was that what the future held for her kids?
Kelly had barely eaten dinner that night, and now she felt sick to her stomach. Kai and Kinley, her babies. They would probably reach high school age and give interviews to People magazine about how they hated their mother, how she had chosen fame over playing with them.
Tears fell onto Kelly’s cheeks and a series of quiet sobs began to build. From this view she didn’t feel like the luckiest girl in America. She didn’t want to spend another hour with her trainer or get up early for another shot of Botox. She couldn’t see an end to her fame. But she could feel something she hadn’t felt before tonight.
The prison walls.
More tears poured down her face, and she did nothing to stop them. Chandra had said she didn’t really have friends. Wasn’t the same true for her? Tonight she should’ve been reading to Kai and Kinley, helping them get ready for bed. Talking to her husband about how they’d fallen so far from the people they used to be.
Kelly could barely breathe for the sobs that choked her. She realized as she wept that for the first time since she could remember she wasn’t worried about whether her eyes would be swollen in the morning.
She was lonely and broken and worried about her heart. Her kids. Worried about her future. Her life.
How terrible that she hadn’t talked to her parents in forty-eight hours. Her dad’s situation wasn’t stable. She was about to open her computer again and check her e-mail, see if her parents had updated her on her father’s condition, when her cell phone rang.
The sound made Kelly jump. As she answered it she caught a glimpse of the caller ID. It was her mother. “Mom!” She sounded awful, her nose stuffy. “I was just thinking about all of you. How’s Dad?”
“Honey . . .” Her mom clearly had been crying, too. “He’s worse. He has an infection.” She paused. “His fever is very high.”
Panic pulsed through Kelly. She was on her feet, pacing, pushing her fingernails through her hair. “What . . . what happened?”
“We don’t know. The ambulance came.” Her voice broke. “I can’t lose him. Please . . . can you come? He’s . . . he’s in trouble.”
“Dear God, no.” She whispered the words as more tears blurred her eyes. She wasn’t ready for this, wasn’t ready to say good-bye to her daddy. Not yet.
“Kelly?”
“I’m sorry.” She fought through her sorrow. “Yes, I can come. Of course. I’ll find a way. I’ll see if the show’s private jet can get me there before sunrise.”
Her mom told her the details, which hospital, which room. “Cal’s already here. He has the kids.”
“Right.” The kids! Kelly felt dazed. She finished the call and dropped to her knees at the edge of the sofa. Kelly had completely forgotten about Kai and Kinley going with Cal to Greenville this weekend. Cal had arranged the visit through Kelly’s manager. Rudy had shot a quick e-mail to Kelly explaining that Cal wanted the kids to have as much time as possible with their grandparents. Kelly felt horrified. Until her mother’s call she had completely forgotten where they were. What sort of mother did that make her?
The tears came harder and she collapsed over the edge of the sofa. For the first time in too many years, more than her next heartbeat she cared about just one thing.
“Dear God. Jesus . . .” she prayed out loud. Spoke His name out loud. And though the words sounded foreign, a peace fell like rain around her. “I need to get home. I . . . I have to be with my family. Please . . . help my dad. Help me get there in time.” She was shaking, overcome by the strangest mix of emotions. A peace like she’d never known and a fear big enough to consume her.
“Is it too late for me, God?” The sobs kept coming. “I turned my back on You.” She squeezed her eyes shut, her fists pressed to her face. “Stubborn pride.” Anger strangled her voice. Who had she become? Celebrity was nothing but a snare. Running after a body and Botox and a boyfriend barely out of college. What had she been thinking? “Plain old stupid. That’s all it was, God.” Sadness and frustration came in waves, fury at her years of selfishness.
All of it consumed her until she had no more tears to cry.
The urgency of her father’s situation drew her back to her feet. She found her phone and called Samuel Meier. “There’s been an emergency.”
And like that pieces fell into place. An hour later Kelly flew out of LaGuardia on the Fifteen Minutes private jet. Three hours after that she rushed through the front door of the hospital, up the elevator to the seventh-floor intensive care unit. She found the waiting room and there they were.
Kai and Kinley and Cal.
The kids looked sad and tired but mostly confused. When they saw her they ran to her, their eyes flooded with relief. Mommy was here. All was right with their world. Kelly stooped down and hugged both of them. What was she thinking, missing so much time with them? She had no answers for herself. As she stood, empty and exhausted, Cal came to her. Their eyes met and in a single heartbeat there was no broken relationship, no affairs or unkind words, no years of estrangement.
“Kelly . . . I’m sorry.” His eyes were red, his cheeks tearstained. He loved her dad as much as she did.
“No. It’s my fault.” She stared at the floor, struggling. When she looked up, his eyes held a love she’d forgotten. She took a step closer. “I’m so sorry, Cal.”
They came together in a hug that only a husband and wife could share, close, connected in body, heart, mind, and soul. Never mind what had happened or where things might go from here. She had no real answers, and whatever they decided none of it would be easy. But here and now with their kids sitting nearby, the hug was the most right thing in the world. They stayed that way for a full minute, not speaking.
Because for the first time in a long time, no words were needed.
chapter 22
A strange uneasiness had become part of Reese’s existence. The feeling woke her up each morning and breathed fear against her while she showered and curled her hair. It was something she couldn’t shake even in the happy moments each morning with her parents. The uneasiness sat strangely next to her in the car on the way to work and shared a saddle with her while she helped Toby and AJ at the Lowell Therapeutic Equestrian Center. AJ was feeling better, her serious symptoms gone for the time being.
But even that didn’t help the way Reese felt.
Especially today when the first live performance of Fifteen Minutes would air in a little over an hour. She parked in front of Zack’s house and skipped up the stairs. She wore white shorts and a light blue T-shirt. Her face and arms were tanned from being on her horse, and humidity made the back of her neck damp. Still, despite the smoldering heat something cold ran through her blood. She hesitated before knocking, leaning her forehead against the Dylans’ front door. Her heart pounded in her chest.
Please, God . . . I don’t want to feel this way. If something’s going on with Zack, if You’re trying to warn me, then make it clear. Otherwise, please give me peace.
As she started to knock, Grandpa Dan opened the door. “Well, hello.” He leaned on his cane, his smile kind, gentle. “It’s the big night.”
“Yes.” She stepped in and hugged him. “You excited?”
Grandpa Dan looked as troubled as Reese felt. “I’m not sure.” He put his hand on her shoulder. “What about you?”
“Nervous.” She tried to smile. “I can’t figure it out. I just . . . I don’t feel right about things.”
The old man put his free arm around her and together they walked into the family room. For now the TV was off. Zack’s mom was at the computer, but as they walked in she stood and came to Reese. “It gets serious starting tonight.”
“Hmm. Very serious.” Again Reese had to remind herself to smile. “You checking the website?”
“I was about to. I haven’t looked in a few days.” His mother shared the same concerned look. “I can be obsessed with all the media attention.”
Reese allowed a sad laugh. “It’s ove
rwhelming.” Between Twitter and the updates on Yahoo and other gossip sites, someone posted a different story or photo shoot or event involving the top twenty from Fifteen Minutes every few hours.
When they had moved into the kitchen to work on dinner and she was alone, Reese finished typing in the web address for Fifteen Minutes. The site opened immediately, as flashy and polished as any Reese had ever seen. The home page had changed him, with Zack and Zoey clearly featured. “Watch a real-life Romeo and Juliet story that includes more drama than we’ve had any other season.” The home page had changed since the last time she’d looked at it. Her reason for checking now was something she’d seen on Twitter earlier.
Shocking revelation—don’t miss it!! Tonight on #Fifteen Minutes!
Her heart raced ahead of her. She scanned the page, looking past the announcement of show times and dates and the fact that tonight was the debut of live performances. Then she saw something that made her heart drop to her knees.
A headline near the top of the home page read, “Romeo and Juliet?” Beneath that in smaller print it read, “Season ten involves every kind of story. Even a love story. Watch the preview now.”
Reese’s palms felt clammy and the room started to spin. It can’t be Zack, right? That isn’t possible. She closed her eyes and remembered what he’d told her the last time they talked. He was more frustrated than she could remember him ever being. Frustrated and tired. “They keep trying to make a story out of Zoey and me,” he’d told her. “It doesn’t matter how many times I tell them I have a girlfriend.”
She had sympathized with him, but hadn’t the uneasy feeling come upon her around the same time? She gripped the edge of the desk and blinked her eyes open, staring once more at the white triangle play button. She could click it and the preview of the Romeo and Juliet story would play. Her fingers trembled. There was nothing to fear. Zack hadn’t done anything wrong. His feelings for her hadn’t changed. She steadied herself and started the video.
The piece was only thirty seconds long and it moved quickly. “On tonight’s show,” Kip Barker said into the camera as the preview started. The top twenty rehearsed a dance number behind him, with Zack and Zoey clearly featured. “Watch a real-life Romeo and Juliet story that includes more drama than we’ve had any other season.”
A quick cut showed Zack singing his heart out and then the judges asking if he was single. “No,” he told them, “I have a girlfriend back home.” Just as quickly the image changed and Zack was onstage finishing a group number, his arm around Zoey. “Every season involves some kind of heartbreak,” Kip said in the voice-over. “But this season it gets personal.” Video snapshots from half a dozen photo shoots showed Zack and Zoey constantly together. “What happens,” Kip said, “when the pressure gets too great, when circumstances throw two unsuspecting people together.” The shot became dimly lit, Zack and Zoey sitting in an empty, darkened hallway, lost in what looked like some serious conversation.
Reese wanted to shut off the computer or look away, scream for time to stop, but it was too late. The next shot showed Zack facing Zoey in the same hallway, his hand alongside her face as he moved closer for what absolutely looked like a kiss.
The video cut back to Kip in front of the rehearsing contestants. “Find out what’s happening to this real-life Romeo and Juliet”—Kip sounded deeply dramatic—“tonight . . . when the live shows begin . . . on Fifteen Minutes.”
Reese stared at the screen, and for several seconds she couldn’t breathe or cry or scream. Had he really kissed her? Zack, the guy she’d loved all these years? She could see him sitting beside her in the pre-dawn light the morning he left for auditions. Nothing will change, I promise . . .
The memory of his words stabbed at her. Why hadn’t she seen this coming? The signs were all there. The answer—the only answer—was that she had trusted him. Implicitly. Perfectly. Other people might let success change them, but not Zack. Not her guy.
Reese stood and black spots danced before her eyes. I’m going to faint. Please, God, don’t let me faint. She had to leave, had to get out of Zack’s house before she threw something or fell on the ground in a heap and never got up. She wanted to run to the other side of the world, as far away as she could from the Fifteen Minutes craze and the fact that in just a few hours everyone would be buzzing about Zack and Zoey. And people who didn’t know her from Texas to Tacoma to Tampa would feel sorry for the girl back home.
She closed her eyes for a moment. This couldn’t be happening. She grabbed her keys and started for the door, but then she stopped. None of this was Zack’s family’s fault. She was about to turn back and make a quick explanation about her departure to Mrs. Dylan and Grandpa Dan, when Zack’s father and brother entered the house. They looked hot and worn out, but they must’ve seen something in her face that made them stop cold.
“Reese?” Zack’s dad took a step closer. “You okay?”
She shook her head. “No, sir.” Her tone remained kind, gentle. The go-to voice for any good Southern girl. “I need to get home.”
“What happened?” Duke came to her and touched her arm. “Something with your family?”
“The show.” She pointed back at the computer. Words wouldn’t come. The shock was too great. “They’re showing something tonight . . . with Zack and that girl.”
Grandpa Dan and Zack’s mom joined the others in the room and seemed to sense immediately that something was wrong. “Honey, what?” Grandpa Dan came to her, his brow furrowed. “What happened?”
Zack’s father took control of the moment. “Reese said there’s going to be something on tonight’s show about Zack and some girl.” He looked to her. “A girl from the show?”
“Yes.” Reese needed to leave. She had to make this quick. “Her name’s Zoey. Zoey Davis?”
The other four nodded, all of them holding tight to every word. “Go on.” Grandpa Dan still stood beside her.
“I watched a preview . . . on the computer. They’re calling Zack and Zoey this season’s Romeo and Juliet.”
Grandpa Dan sighed and looked out the window. “That’s not right.”
“Is there any proof?” Dara moved to the spot next to her husband, her troubled eyes on Reese. “About the two of them?”
“Sort of.” Reese grabbed a partial breath. If she didn’t leave soon she’d start crying. “The preview only showed part of the video. But they look . . . very close.” She didn’t want to talk about it. She couldn’t. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to see the rest.” The right thing to do might’ve been to walk around and give hugs, bid everyone a proper good-bye. But she didn’t have time for that. “I need to go.”
“Okay.” Dara hugged her. Together the family walked her to the front door. “You’re going home?”
“I’m not sure.” Reese could feel tears welling in her eyes again. The sadness was gaining ground. “I’m sorry. I’ll talk to you soon.” She looked at Grandpa Dan and over her shoulder at Zack’s dad and brother. “All of you.”
Grandpa Dan gave her a side hug as she headed out. “We’ll watch the show. And then I’ll call Zack myself.” He held Reese’s gaze. “Whatever this is, there has to be a reason. That boy loves you.”
Reese couldn’t talk. She nodded and smiled and hurried down the steps to her car. She felt like she’d fallen into a dark hole, a nightmare. Was she really leaving before the show even began? Had that video really happened? And had Zack really kissed her?
“No,” she whispered the word out loud as she reached her car. “He wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t.”
Tears fell down her face again. How could you, Zack? The question drilled itself into her mind. She missed him so much. Missed walking with him and riding beside him and laughing late into the night. The real Zack, the one the world knew nothing about. That Zack consumed her heart and mind. The same wasn’t true for him. Clearly. Whatever was happening behind closed doors on the Fifteen Minutes set, one thing was obvious. Zack and Zoey shared something special.
Once she was out of Zack’s driveway, she turned left. She had no idea where she wanted to go, just that she needed to get there. Away from Zack’s house and Grandpa Dan and his family who felt so much like her own. Away from a TV set. Without meaning to, she headed toward the Lowell Therapeutic Equestrian Center. She drove through the pitch-dark parking lot to the spot closest to the stables. The groundskeepers had seen her come at this hour before. No one would bother her.
Reese killed the engine and climbed out. The air smelled sweeter here, and she breathed deep. The fence called to her. She walked to it and swung herself up onto the top rail. This was her spot, the place she sat between students, when she wanted only to watch the horses and dream about making a difference for hurting kids.
On those sunny afternoons, the view from this part of the fence was like a painting, and over time it had come to represent the future for her. A future that would be built around horses and horse farms and beautiful rolling green open spaces. The future she had pictured with Zack. It was appropriate that now, through the muggy summer night, she could see nothing but darkness.
“Why, Zack? How come?” Her broken voice pierced the silence. She wiped her tears with the backs of her hands. She covered her eyes with her fingers and let the tears come. She should’ve seen this coming, with all the tweets between the two of them. With the pictures coming out of their photo shoots and staged events.
But this was Zack Dylan. No matter what her eyes had told her along the way, she had listened to her heart, to the past and everything she had known to be true about the guy she loved. Zack hadn’t given her any hint that he was falling for Zoey. Maybe Reese was going crazy, blinded by devotion. Whatever the reason, she hadn’t seen this coming.
She leaned on the fence post and stared into the black sky. The stars were alive here and with each breath, with each hard-hitting heartbeat she came to grips with reality. Her tears slowed and then stopped. God . . . You’re with me. I feel You here.
I am with you always, my daughter. I love you too much to leave you alone.
Fifteen Minutes: A Novel Page 22