He closed his eyes and groaned. He should not be thinking of Miss Valentine in such a manner. She was a vicar’s niece and sister of a friend. She had already been ruined because others choose to believe the worst, and he was no better for lusting after her.
But how could a man not lust after such curves and beauty? He would have to be dead.
The door opened, and Miss Valentine’s questioning eyes appeared before him. They were so deep, so blue, and this was the second time he was arrested by their intensity. Had she always been so serious? Her auburn eyebrows arched as if waiting for him to speak, and her lips parted slightly. Why had he never noticed their fullness before? Or the delicate line of her jaw? In addition to the body of a goddess, Miss Valentine had very kissable lips.
“Would you like to come in?”
Noah jerked his gaze from her mouth to her eyes. “Yes.”
She stood back and pulled the door further open. “Penelope is sleeping at the moment.”
He strolled to the bed and looked down at his sister. She lay curled on her side just as she had done as a child. Dark eyelashes feathered her cheeks, and her breathing was even and unlabored. There was a slight blush to her cheeks, but they were no longer red with fever.
“I think she will sleep for some time,” Miss Valentine said from the foot of the bed.
“That is good. She will recover quicker with rest.” He turned to Miss Valentine. “Lady Meadows asked that you join us.”
She shook her head. “I will be with your sister. Someone should be here if she awakens and needs something.”
“There are staff to see to her comfort,” Noah reminded Miss Valentine. He was torn between wishing Miss Valentine remain with Penelope because he trusted her and wanting Miss Valentine to join them for the sleigh ride.
Where had the sudden urge to spend more time with Miss Valentine come from? He had known her since childhood and had never been compelled to spend time in her company before.
“It is my position to care for your sister,” Miss Valentine reminded him of her station.
Is that why he had never given her consideration before? He shook the thought from his mind. When it came to matters of friendship, the station from which a person was born did not matter. Yet, when considering a wife, he had only looked among society? Is that why he had settled upon Lady Jillian? Had he been looking in the wrong places?
The thought flooded him with shock, and he took a step back. He could not think clearly standing before Miss Valentine. Perhaps it was best if she remained with Penelope and out of his sight so he could think clearly.
“I hope you don’t remain in this chamber for the remainder of the party,” he said after a few moments. “Phoebe would be quite disappointed.”
“Lady Sandlin?”
Noah found himself chuckling. “I know it was a ruse to send you as Penelope’s companion.”
She bit her upper lip. “I had nothing to do with their plans.”
“I know.” He smiled. “But she wants you to enjoy yourself, and I hope you do.”
“Once Lady Penelope is recovered, I promise to try.” She returned his smile. “In the meantime, you did hire me to take care of her. I intend to do just that.” Miss Valentine turned away from Noah and walked to the side of the bed and settled into a chair. “I hope you enjoy the outing.”
“Thank you.” Noah nodded and quit the room. When the door closed behind him, he shrank back against the wall.
What was he doing? What was he thinking? His purpose for this house party was to see if he and Lady Jillian would suit. He needed a wife. Yet, it was Miss Valentine he desired to kiss. Was it simply because he had seen her in her shift and knew what lay beneath the clothing? Is that what stirred his lust, or was it deeper?
Noah turned toward the stairs and made his way down and to the sitting room where others had gathered. His attraction to Miss Valentine could simply be from this morning, and he should not be so quick to disregard Lady Jillian. This was something that needed time and deciding on a wife should never be made in haste.
The room was empty save Lady Jillian when he entered.
“Where has everyone gone?”
“They left to go riding in the sleighs.”
Noah moved to the window. Outside, the horse-drawn sleighs, loaded with guests of Lord and Lady Meadows, made their way across the back of the lawn. He would have enjoyed riding in this weather, with the light snow falling, but there wasn’t any room left in the already crowded sleighs.
He turned to Lady Jillian. “You did not wish to join them?”
She glanced down as a shy smile played upon her lips. “I thought to stay with you.”
No woman had ever made such a bold statement to a gentleman she had known for so short a time. Perhaps some of his concerns on how they would suit could be put to rest. Maybe there was more to Lady Jillian than being a proper, sweet lady of the ton.
Nine
Lady Jillian glided across the room to join Noah at the window. “There is a peacefulness with new fallen snow.”
Noah glanced down at her. Hadn’t she mentioned earlier that she did not like snow?
“The landscape is so beautiful, clean, and pure.” Her words were soft as if she didn’t wish to disturb the quiet.
“Until someone or something tromps through the blanket of white.” Noah looked at the disruption to the snow by the guests, horses, and sleighs.
“Perhaps it isn’t disturbed out this window.” Lady Jillian linked her arm through his and pulled Noah to a window overlooking the south side of the house. Nothing had walked in this area yet, and white hung heavy off of limbs and blanketed the ground. The only thing marring the ground were bushes, long dormant, sticking up from the snow. He knew gardens lay between the house and the gazebo which stood in front of the tree line. Beyond were a path and a small orangery Lady Meadows had built some years ago. Lord Meadows had wanted it attached to the house, but Lady Meadows had wanted a separate building tucked away. After much grumbling, Lord Meadows had an area cleared of trees to allow sunlight to fill the building and had it built to Lady Meadow’s specifications.
“I’ll beat you,” a young voice called before four small figures dashed from the side of the house toward the timber. Noah found himself chuckling.
“Who are they?”
“The first two boys belong to Lord and Lady Meadows,” Noah answered as the boys darted through the trees. “The other two belong to Sir Lavins and his wife.”
“Shouldn’t they be at their studies with their tutors?”
Was there disapproval in Lady Jillian’s tone? “I would not be surprised if they were dismissed for the day. Once the boys saw the snow it would be impossible to concentrate on their studies.”
“I hope such lack of discipline is not a habit their tutors indulge in.”
Noah was taken aback by her sharp, disapproving tone. Lady Jillian’s childhood must have been nothing but books and governesses. “All four are intelligent students and ahead in their studies. A few days of playing in the snow will not do them any harm.”
Lady Jillian sighed. “What do you suppose they are going to do?”
Noah found himself smiling as he remembered what he and the Valentine brothers would do on the rare occasions snow fell heavily at their home. “They are probably building a fort.”
Lady Jillian turned to him. “A fort?”
“Yes.” He grinned. “Roll all the snow up to make a wall in which to hide behind.”
“Why would they wish to hide?”
“To duck away from the snowballs,” he answered turning back toward the window. “The snow is perfect for a fight.”
“Isn’t it dangerous?”
Noah chuckled. “Not at all.”
Lady Jillian turned toward him, and he glanced down at her face. She was beautiful. Her lips parted as if in anticipation. Did she know he had been contemplating kissing her earlier?
Silence filled the room. Nobody was about, and the boys were long
gone. Now was as good a time as any.
Noah lifted his hand to her cheek and lowered his mouth to hers. She remained rigid and though she did kiss him back, there was no passion. In fact, he felt absolutely nothing other than her lips against his. He pulled back and looked down at her. Lady Jillian offered a shy smile. Was she actually pleased with his kiss?
Perhaps this wasn’t the right time and maybe his emotions were not engaged as they should be. He had spent a good part of the morning worried about Penelope. He simply needed to relax. His sister was going to recover.
Lady Jillian licked her upper lip. In most instances, a gentleman would consider this an invitation and be hard pressed not to kiss her again. Such was not the case. Yet, Noah found himself lowering his mouth to hers once more in an automatic response. As before, she returned his kiss, but he had no desire to delve further, to pull her into his arms, or to feel her body molded against his.
He pulled away. This time a blush stole into her cheeks and the same slight smile returned, while he felt absolutely nothing.
“Forgive me,” he muttered and turned away.
Bloody hell. What was he to do? He did not want Lady Jillian. No kiss should be so cold, and he inwardly cringed at the lack of warmth in more intimate relations. It may be time to set up his nursery but not with someone he had no desire to kiss ever again. If he couldn’t enjoy kissing her, he certainly would find no joy in bedding her.
Noah thrust his fingers through his hair. “I should not have taken advantage.”
She came up and placed a hand on his arm. “You have nothing to apologize for. I found it rather pleasant.”
He stared down at her. Pleasant? How was that even possible?
“Still, I should not have kissed you. I should not even be alone with you.” He turned toward the door. He had to get away from her to think. “Please excuse me.”
“Ah, there you are,” Lady Meadows announced as she came into the room.
Noah halted in his stride toward the door. “You did not join the others?”
“No, I have other duties to attend to,” she answered. “Besides there wasn’t any room for me, and I can ride at any time.”
Lady Jillian moved to where Lady Meadows was taking a seat.
“Tea will be delivered shortly.” Lady Meadows looked over at Noah. “I hoped you could help me.”
“Of course.” He joined the ladies in the sitting area. “How can I be of service?”
“I thought to have a Scavenger Hunt. What items shall I list?”
“If you will excuse me,” Lady Jillian answered. “I believe I will go rest.”
“You don’t wish to help us make a list?” Noah asked.
She bit her bottom lip and looked at Lady Meadows. “I am not very good with games, but I am sure whatever you decide will be enjoyable.”
Noah watched Lady Jillian exit the room. She hadn’t played in the snow before, and she wasn’t very good at games. What else did he not know about her? Was there no adventure at all in her spirit? There was certainly no excitement in her kiss.
Thank goodness he had kissed Lady Jillian now instead of waiting until he had gained permission to court her. The outcome could have been disastrous. Hopefully her brother said nothing to Lady Jillian with regard to his intentions.
“Darling, you aren’t really asking Felding for help, are you?”
Noah and Lady Meadows turned to find Lord Meadows walking in the room. “Why not?” Lady Meadows asked.
“It will give him an unfair advantage,” the man grinned. “A participant cannot have the list ahead of time.”
“I suppose you are correct,” Lady Meadows smiled conspiratorially toward her husband. “I also think we should assign the teams as well.
Noah stood. “If you will excuse me.” He had to be away from others to think.
Lady Jillian was not the wife for him. Yes, she was beautiful, accomplished, and by all appearances sweet and kind. But she was also rigid, had no interest in enjoying the outdoors, and claimed not to do very well in games. Other than a lovely singing voice, there was little to recommend her for how they would spend their evenings once married. If he came to know her better, Noah suspected he would find they had very little in common. If that was the case, she would likely not share many interests with his sisters three of which still remained home.
He strode down the hall to Meadows’ library and closed the door after entering the room. He marched to the window and looked out at the landscape. Beyond the trees, he could see boys darting behind shelters and snowballs were sent flying. A smile pulled at his lips.
If he were to marry Lady Jillian, this is the very activity he would encourage whereas she may insist on the children remaining at their studies. However, if he were to marry someone like Miss Valentine, they might share in the joy of the new fallen snow with their children.
Noah stiffened. If he married someone like Miss Valentine? Where had that thought come from?
He turned from the window and stared into the room not really seeing anything.
Why was he thinking of Miss Valentine in terms of marriage? Was it because he had seen her in her shift? The vision came forth in his mind, and he groaned. Where Lady Jillian’s kiss left him cold, the vision of Miss Valentine heated his veins in a way he hadn’t experienced in some time.
All this time he had been looking for a wife, had he been looking in the wrong place? He assumed he would find her amongst Society like so many of his friends, but until he formed a brief attraction to Lady Jillian, nobody had made him wish to end his bachelor state.
Had the woman who would bring him happiness and a loving home been living next door to his estate this entire time?
The thought was jarring. However, he would not act on this new discovery until he thought it through. He had already spoken to Lord Broadridge and would need to let the gentleman know that he had been mistaken and would not be asking to court Lady Jillian. He would not be making the same mistake by speaking to Demetrius either. Besides, Demetrius was a friend and if Noah spoke too soon and he was mistaken, he might just put a wedge between the friendship and between their families.
What he would do is take advantage of this house party and become reacquainted with Miss Valentine. At the end, they would both return to their homes. As she would be at Phoebe’s, it would be easy to visit her and see how matters progressed.
But first, he needed to determine exactly what Miss Valentine meant to him and his future or if he only felt simply lust with no hope of a deeper connection.
Noah settled into a chair in the back corner of the library beside the window. What to do about Lady Jillian? Perhaps if he simply kept his distance from the lady for the duration of the party, Broadridge would understand without any words being spoken.
Yet, he had kissed her. What if Lady Jillian believed there was more to his intentions than there were? Yesterday he had planned to court her, but that had changed within a day.
Blast! When had he become so fickle?
* * *
Rosalind watched the horses pull the sleighs away. Practically every guest of Lord and Lady Meadows were piled into them except Lord Felding and Lady Jillian. Why had they decided to remain behind? Was it simply because there was not enough room, or did they wish to be alone? Not that it would be proper for an unattached lady to be alone with a gentleman, but a chaperone could sit in the room with them.
She leaned forward placing her forehead against the cool glass window. It was best she did remain up here with Penelope. She didn’t want to watch Felding court Lady Jillian more than necessary.
She wished she could like the lady, but it was impossible. And she knew why. Rosalind was jealous; it was an emotion she despised in herself. She always knew Felding would never be for her, so why did it hurt so much to watch him pay court someone else? It wasn’t as if he had ever shown her attention or given her encouragement. Only in her daydreams did he do so.
The sleighs disappeared over the horizon, and R
osalind turned from the window. She could only hope he never learned of her infatuation. Having Felding seeing her as he had this morning was bad enough. If Felding learned of her feelings for him, her humiliation would know no bounds.
“Why aren’t you with the others?” Penelope asked quietly.
Rosalind turned to her. “I would rather take care of you.”
Penelope frowned. “I will be fine,” she insisted.
Rosalind tucked the blanket up to Penelope’s chin. “I am sure you will, but I want to stay.”
Penelope narrowed her eyes. “Are you avoiding the other guests?”
It wasn’t the other guests she wished to not be around, only Lady Jillian, but she didn’t dare say such a thing to Penelope. The lady may one day become Penelope’s sister-in-law. “I promise to join them for the afternoon meal.”
“Good,” Penelope said and snuggled deeper beneath the covers. “What shall we do until then?”
“I could read to you until you sleep,” Rosalind suggested. There wasn’t much else they could do while Penelope lay ill in her bed.
“That would be lovely,” she sighed.
“I’ll retrieve a book from Lord Meadows’ library and return shortly.”
Rosalind opened the door and stepped into the hall right into the path of Lady Jillian. “Excuse me,” she took a step back.
Lady Jillian stopped and studied Rosalind form head to toe. “That is a lovely dress.” She smiled. “It looks almost as nice on you as it did Lady Sandlin last spring.”
“Thank you,” Rosalind murmured. “She was kind enough to loan it to me as I wasn’t prepared to join the house party on such short notice.”
“I’ve always admired how Lord Felding and his family take care of and befriend those beneath them.”
His Christmas Match (A Gentleman's Guide to Once Upon a Time) Page 7