The ride home was long and silent, but as my companions walked me to the door, they both suddenly seized an arm and drug me to the side of the house. Mrs. Whitby looked back at the three of us with a question on her lips.
“Oh don’t worry Mrs. Whitby we will have her in before midnight, we just wanted to talk with her a little while longer. We will be right here by the pond.”
Dekker and Horace each walked me out of ear shot of the driver and Mrs. Whitby who stood at the door with a grim look on her face.
“Okay Claren, spill. Who the deuce was that man?” Dekker asked roughly.
“Claren, we were charged by your uncle to take care of you while out with us, and that man put us in a much compromised position.” Horace took up the argument.
“I don’t know what to say gentlemen.” I said stepping back a little from them both. I felt a little overwhelmed by their questioning.
“Now don’t try to get away Claren. We want answers.” Dekker said as he gently pulled me back. I pulled my cloak around myself tighter trying to think of a suitable answer to give them.
When I didn’t answer right away, Dekker threw up his hands in defeat as he looked at Horace.
“I knew it! There has been someone else, Horace! This whole time we’ve been trying to romance Claren, that black clad upstart has stolen her right from under our noses!”
“Well if you weren’t so boring Dekker…”Horace began.
“Me boring?” Dekker said his voice raising. “I’m not the one who drools when talking about robotics!”
“No you only drool when talking about the female androids!”
“Well perhaps if you weren’t so short…” Dekker started.
“Me short? I would like to inform you that I am the perfect height! You are the one that is not a suitable companion for Miss Claren, you short, stocky, rogue!”
“What? Short, stocky rogue? I would have you know that I am taller than some and shorter than others! And if it wasn’t for your bumbling overtures, we would not have been made to look like a fool when that chap came and stole her away this evening!”
“That’s all you really care about isn’t it Dekker? Being made a fool?”
“Please, please stop arguing.” I pleaded with them both. Two pairs of determined eyes looked back at me. I knew that they had long forgotten that I was there.
“I do not care about looking like a fool, and I’ll prove it!” Dekker said as he raced back towards the carriage. A second later a look of realization dawned on Horace and he raced after Dekker. Dekker flung the carriage door open and they both tried to enter the door at once while slapping at each other. They jostled about until they both found what they were looking for. With a strange crinkling noise, they both burst forth from the carriage with dual flower bouquets in their hands. Both men raced towards me and nearly knocked me over. As if on cue, they both shoved their beaten bouquets at me.
“Claren.” They both started then stopped, glaring at one another. I was speechless at this behavior but there was a part of me that wanted to laugh at their silliness. I felt as though I needed to get control of the situation.
“Gentlemen, if you please, I will hear both of you out, one at a time. The younger of the two may go first then I will hear out the remaining gentleman.” I had an idea of what they wanted to ask me, and I also knew what I was going to say.
“That would be me old man. Beauty before age in any case.” Dekker said trying to smooth down his wild blond locks. He held the flowers in front of him.
“Claren, I know that we have not known each other for long but I admire you greatly. I know you probably see me as a bit of a ladies’ man but truly I am not. I wish to formally ask you if you would be willing to court me?” I smiled at him.
“Now I will hear Horace.” Horace smiled nervously and placed his bunch of flowers between us as if a shield.
“Miss Lowood, I have spoken to my mother and while she does want to meet you first before anything official like courting takes place, it is my one wish that you court with me.”
“Your mother? Your mother? Are you a man or a mouse Horace? Claren is not interested in courting your mother, so why does she rule your life so?”
“You leave my mother out of this Dekker! This is between Claren, mother and myself.” Dekker was about to respond when a sound that I had heard before and knew well, surrounded us. A great wind rushing towards us blew my hair in my face as Etrigan landed in back of me like an avenging angel. Horace and Dekker stared with their mouths open. Etrigan moved in front of me and ripped each bunch of flowers out of their hands and unceremoniously threw the flowers down to the ground. He grasped my hand tightly and addressed my would be suitors.
“Claren is not free to court. Do you understand?” Etrigan said in a low voice.
“Yes.” Came the unflattering quick, unanimous replies.
I could see my friends were shocked at the sudden dramatic appearance of Etrigan. Dekker was the first to regain his composure.
“So, you are not going to eat us then?” he said nervously adjusting his jacket. Etrigan shook his head no while studying Dekker in return.
“You’re the fellow from the Ball tonight?” Horace asked cautiously.
“Yes I am.” Etrigan answered guardedly. I realized this was the first time he had spoken to other males in his age group since he was a little boy.
“You know that was by invitation only, don’t you?” Horace said with a quaking voice.
Does it seem like an invitation would matter to me? Etrigan said stone faced. Dekker shot Horace a warning look and whispered urgently to him.
“What do you think you are doing? Do you want to anger him?” He then addressed Etrigan. “I say then, we will respect your wishes regarding Miss Lowood, she is a pleasant companion but if you have rights to her, well by all means we concede! Now please forgive my rudeness, but are those appendages real?” Dekker said pointing to Etrigan’s wings. Etrigan straightened his spine and flexed his wings outward, showing the two men their impressive width.
“Yes they are real, and no you cannot touch them.” Horace studied Etrigan intently. It worried me that he was more curious then frightened.
“My friends, perhaps I need to explain some things to you.” I said trying to catch Horace’s eye. Dekker, restored to his old self again, raised a cocky eyebrow.
“Perhaps Claren? I would say it would definitely be a prerequisite to continue our friendship, no matter how lovely I find you.” Etrigan moved his wings slowly toward Dekker in a menacing fashion as Dekker was compelled to add, “Even though you are not free to court.” The wings moved slowly back to their original place behind Etrigan.
“I ask a favor of you both, please do not say anything of this meeting or of Etrigan to anyone. This also means your mother Horace, if you come back tomorrow, say noon, I will explain everything to you. Agreed?” I extended my hand out to them. I felt Etrigan’s hand still gripping mine and once the other two placed their hands on mine we were all four linked.
Telling Uncle
When my two companions had left in their carriage, Etrigan walked me to the front door of the house.
“I am sorry if I upset you tonight Claren.”
“No Etrigan you didn’t. I only worry if there will be any repercussions from the public or your father.”
“I will speak to my father.”
“I must tell him that those gentlemen will be coming by tomorrow. He wants me to tell him every little thing.” I said. Etrigan cast a curious look over to the darkened trees behind me.
“Go to bed Claren. I will speak to my father tonight.” He let go of my hand abruptly and opened the front door ushering me inside while he stayed outside. I wondered at his behavior but nevertheless obeyed. Mrs. Whitby was waiting for me in the living room.
“Is everything all right Miss?”
“Yes, I am very tired. Are you remaining the night then?” I asked.
“Yes, it’s too late to go on home now. I’l
l ring Thomas to let him know. You go on up to bed.”
Back in my bedroom I hugged Naza hard, I felt deliriously happy. Etrigan had clasped my hand, (it still felt warm!) and had told other men that I was not free to court. I was no mathematician but I hoped that in this case, one and one did equal interest from Etrigan.
The next morning I was awoken by a hard knock on the door and with no admittance granted, the door was thrust open. Mr. Lowood stood in my doorway looking much like an older version of the avenging angel I saw last night.
“What is going on here Claren? What have you gotten my son into?” Mr. Lowood strode to the foot of my bed. I felt vulnerable in that position and sat up pulling my blankets up with me. Naza sat up quickly looking at him intently.
“What do you mean?” I whispered.
“My son went out last night! He was seen! Do you know what this could mean?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Now there are men coming here today? Who, those two trouble makers, Bitwater and Peterson?” Before I could answer a dark shadow entered from the hallway. Etrigan entered my room and regarded his father. The two men standing in my room made it seem small.
“Why are you yelling at her? She has done nothing.”
“I thought you were sleeping.” Mr. Lowood said trying to regain his composure.
“Why are you yelling at her Father?” Fredrick pulled his pipe out of his inside coat pocket as was his habit.
“I didn’t mean to yell, I’m sorry if I woke you.”
“She didn’t know that I followed her, she is not to blame.”
“But those men coming here…” Mr. Lowood said looking at his son with real apprehension.
“They are coming here just to talk. I believe that we can trust them to keep their words.” Mr. Lowood scoffed and left my room. Etrigan cast a glance at me as if he wanted to say more but only hurried to follow his father.
Etrigan followed his father in to the library, preparing for another verbal assault like the previous one the night before. He had tried to explain to his father about last night but it was like going against a mountain.
“What is it now Etrigan? Fredrick said exasperated.
“I don’t understand why you are so vexed.”
“I am vexed because this young woman has done the one thing I thought she could not do, put you in jeopardy.”
“In jeopardy? From what and whom?” Etrigan asked not understanding his Fathers behavior at all. When his father failed to answer, Etrigan moved back to the library doors.
“I simply do not understand you. You coddle and coo at Claren one moment and the next you are barking questions at her. You will drive her away.”
“What would you do if I did? Maybe it would be for the best for all of us if I did.”
“Why would you want to do that?”
“Answer me Etrigan, what would you do if I sent her away?”
“Just like that? Bring her here so that I can get to know her then send her away once she is not convenient to you any longer?”
“Answer me Etrigan, what would you do?” He asked sternly. Fredrick gazed intently at his son as if there was much riding on Etrigan’s response.
“What makes you think that I would allow something like that to happen?” Etrigan said, his anger near the surface, but controlled.
“You don’t really know Claren, do you boy? You fancy yourself in love with her? Is that why you follow her out at night, risking exposure?” Etrigan looked back into his Fathers ice blue eyes.
“In love? With Claren? That’s absurd! I have more of a chance of withstanding the coldness of outer space than ever being in love with her.” Etrigan turned on his heel and walked out. Fredrick sighed and looked away. A weariness began to settle over him and he felt his years weighing heavy upon his shoulders.
Why would my father even suggest such a thing? Yes having grown to know her is very pleasing to me, but the very idea of Claren and I…
Etrigan stopped short in his thoughts, confusion reigning.
What was love exactly? How was it supposed to feel?
***
The men arrived promptly at noon with two huge picnic hampers of food.
“We’ve come bearing gifts.” Dekker said smiling indicating the hampers.
“We’ll walk to the woods, that is where he is waiting for us.” I informed the two men. I put a sweater on and followed them outside.
When we were a few yards from the house Horace whispered in to my ear.
“Is everything all right Claren?”
“Hey now! No secrets.” Dekker said catching Horace’s movement.
“I just asked her if everything was alright, calm yourself!” Horace flashed back.
“Well let’s just say that the elder Mr. Lowood is not happy that you are here. He doubts your integrity and wishes that you had not met his son last night.” In truth I had heard the last part of Etrigan’s eruption at his father.
“In love? With Claren? That’s absurd! I have more of a chance of withstanding the coldness of outer space than ever being in love with her.”
I had been on my way down the stairs to let Naza out when these flippant words that stabbed my heart came drifting down the stairway. I rubbed my eye hurriedly to make a tear that had formed there go away.
“His son?” Horace asked as we spied Etrigan laying down two large blankets for the four of us to sit down on. He managed a shy wave to the three of us as we approached.
“Yes, Etrigan is Mr. Lowood’s, I mean my Uncle’s son. Please I beg you, keep this secret for me, do not tell anyone of Etrigan’s existence.” I begged them both in a low voice. They both looked startled at my urgent request but nodded solemnly as we approached Etrigan.
“Hello there old chap.” Dekker said putting his hamper down. Etrigan nodded uncomfortably. I realized it was up to me to make the introductions.
“Mr. Etrigan Lowood, please allow me to introduce you to Mr. Horace Bitwater and Mr. Dekker Peterson.” Both men offered their hands to Etrigan which he took even though he eyed them both with the same guarded intensity.
At first we made a strange sight, the four of us sitting on blankets with the hampers in awkward silence, but once I began taking out the food, all three men were united in their love for the feast. They spoke excitedly about the roasted pork and sweet duck and herb potatoes.
“We had to place a special order at Magdalene’s for this feast. Most people have to wait in line hours if you don’t place an order.” Etrigan dug in to every dish with eagerness. I could see he was enjoying himself as much as the others were. By the time I served the chocolate cake the three young men were boisterous and loud, laughing and sharing stories. My heart filled with love for the three of them, Horace and Dekker for seeing past Etrigan’s wings and Etrigan for making an effort to include outsiders in his life. Dekker recalled his days at the Gentlemen’s academy in which he was as he put it, “Given the boot” for clogging all the toilets with baby frogs. While Horace entertained us with stories of days he spent trying to stay out of the trouble that his friend caused.
It all seemed so normal and gay, the four of us picnicking with Naza sniffing at the blanket edges for a treat, but I could not shake off my sadness. His earlier words that I overheard came back to haunt me as negative remarks often do. I couldn’t allow myself to be selfish though, who was I to try to claim Etrigan for my own or even think that he could have feelings for me back? I was and should be grateful for the friendship that he has given me, but I could not help feel sad as I watched him laughing with a chocolate smudge on his lip. Especially when I admitted to myself that I was falling in love with him.
Horace and Dekker plied Etrigan with questions about his wings and flying. Etrigan in turn asked them questions about their childhood and schooling. I myself said very little but quietly removed dirty plates and smiled hollowly. The hours passed until the late January light began to grow hazy. Our guests helped put the rest of the dishes away in the hampers and with gre
at reluctance, bid us farewell.
“Mr. Lowood, it was a grand experience meeting you today.” Horace said and shook Etrigan’s hand. Etrigan smiled delighted. Gone was the guarded look from the night before.
“Same goes for me, you’re not such a bad chap after all. Even though you are keeping Claren from us.” Dekker said.
“I’m sorry, but Claren belongs to me.” Etrigan said simply with a blank expression on his face. Wretched hope sprang up within my heart, followed by anger and pride.
His Black Wings Page 19