I need to pee badly, so I take our pee pot into the empty hut next door and relieve myself and then pour it down the ‘pee chute,’ as we have so fondly named it. It all lands in a large hole way below us and thankfully underground. Why the hell they didn’t make the system simpler by just making it so you could pee right into the chute, I don’t know. Typical men, I suppose—always making things more complicated than needed. I rinse the pot with some of the water and throw that down too.
When I arrive back at our hut, Emily is stirring. I’m bored as shit, so I don’t try to tiptoe around. She looks up at me from her little wooden bed with a smile. There’s color back in her cheeks, and I know if things continue the way that they have been for the past few weeks, she’ll start getting some more meat on her bones soon. It pleases me to think of her getting healthy again. I smile back at her and sit on the edge of her bed.
“Hey, you okay?” I ask.
“Uh-huh.” She yawns and rubs her eyes.
“I’m going to see if anyone is up. You coming?”
“Yeah, sure.” She sits up and stretches, reminding me of when I was woken by Mikey last night.
I’ve thought about him all night: his hand on my cheek and the look in his eye. Do I even want to meet someone else? To begin a new relationship? I don’t think so, but I feel drawn to Mikey.
“Can I talk to you before we go?”
Emily nods and I continue.
“When you two left me—you know, back at the garage—what happened?”
Emily sits up and looks confused. “What do you mean, Nina? Nothing. We just ran for what seemed like ages. We came across a couple of deaders, but Mikey took care of them, and then when we arrived here and he introduced me to everyone.”
“Was everyone nice to you?” I sound like an idiot!
“Um, yeah. Well, JD is—well, JD, and Crunch is obviously Crunch, but yeah, everyone was fine. After a couple of hours Mikey and I got restless because you hadn’t turned up, and I said that I wanted to go look for you, but he wouldn’t let me. He said that he had promised you he would look after me and keep me safe and he wasn’t going to break that promise.” She smiles at me, but I can’t smile back for some reason. “He tried to get some of the others to go with him to find you, but they wouldn’t. They said that you were probably a goner by now anyway. That got him all pissy with everyone, and I freaked out and blamed him for—well, you know, your death, and he stormed off.”
Emily looks like she might cry, so I reach out and give her knee a little squeeze. “And?” I probe.
“So he said he would go look for you on his own. The others warned him that it was going to be getting dark soon, and you could both end up getting lost and killed, but he went anyway.” She smiles more now. “And then you stumbled out into the clearing like you were Superwoman or something.”
I snort. “Hardly. I collapsed into the clearing, more like.”
“Yeah, but I prefer my version.”
I laugh and she unexpectedly leans over and hugs me. I have the urge to push her off again, for several reasons. One being she smells really bad and could do with a good wash, and secondly because I don’t hug. In fact, I hate hugs, and she seems to be hugging me more and more recently. Regardless, I force myself to hug her back, to which she squeezes me tighter.
She pulls away and continues. “He was so relieved when he got back and I told him that you were here.” She gives another smile. A mischievous one, grinning from ear to ear. “I think he likes you, Nina.”
Yeah, I thought that too.
I roll my eyes. “Well, that’s not what we’re here for, Emily.”
Now it’s her turn to roll her eyes at me. “Whatever.” She pushes past me as she climbs out of her bed.
“Don’t ‘whatever’ me. I’m serious. I’m not interested in anything like that.”
She picks up the pee pot as she looks at me. “Nina, it’s obvious that you like him too, but whatever, if that’s’ not what you’re here for.’” She grins as she does little quotation marks with one hand and leaves to go to the bathroom, leaving me to stew with my own thoughts. As if I didn’t have enough to think about already.
Breakfast consists of not very much this morning. My stomach was just starting to get used to having proper food in it and is unsurprisingly grumbly about the situation. I feel the same way and express as much to Mikey.
“Is there nothing for breakfast? There has to be something more than this shit.” Yeah, I sound pissy, and yeah a little bit childish.
“Don’t fucking eat it then, give me your share,” Crunch snarks at me.
I toss the handful of berries in my mouth with a grim smile in her direction, and she huffs and stands to leave.
“What happened to you?” I ask Britta. Her wrist and hand are bandaged up, and she’s favoring her left hand when I know she’s right-handed.
“I slipped using the ropes last night. Crunch thinks it’s just a sprain and not broken, but it hurts like hell.” Britta looks down at her wrists, her face a mask of worry.
“How in God’s name did Crunch become camp doctor?” I frown at Britta, but it’s Duncan who replies.
“Apparently before she got mixed up with all her old man’s crap, she was studying to become a doctor. Got in with the wrong crowd, fucked up her scholarship, and the rest is history. Kept up some of her abilities, though, by patching up other drug-heads.” He shakes his head sadly and takes a sip of his tea.
I sit stunned for a few seconds. That wasn’t what I expected to hear at all. I look at Britta, who’s tenderly rubbing the joint on her wrist.
“I’m sure it’ll be fine.” My words were supposed to be full of concern, but I know I sound more irritated than anything else when I speak, knowing that it means more work for the rest of us. I feel instantly guilty, but it’s too late to take it back.
I reach over and take the mug of hot water with some green leaves floating around in it that Duncan insists is peppermint tea. I taste it and tell him that he’s been miss-sold and that if he keeps spouting bullshit like that, he’ll get himself a lawsuit for false advertising. Duncan laughs and adds more leaves to my cup.
I’m feeling especially shitty this morning because of how Mikey made me feel last night. Seriously, I was just starting to like this place, and now he’s confused me with his weird manly odor, or some crap.
Mikey looks up from biting his nails and smiles in what I assume is his best heartthrob impression.
I roll my eyes. “Seriously, I’m surprised that you haven’t gotten a stomach bug, biting your nails all the time. Do you know how many germs are under those things?” I sit down with a kind of body flop thing going on, and then have the urge to laugh at my own behavior.
Mikey doesn’t rise to my bait and keeps on biting his nails.
“Are we doing a water run today?” I ask Duncan, who’s looking through some binoculars across the lake.
“Yeah,” he replies without looking at me.
I huff out my frustrations.
“What is wrong with you today, Nina?” Britta looks at me with concern, giving me a little tsk noise as she does.
“Sorry.” I shrug back. “Just hungry, you know?”
“Yes, we are all hungry, but we have to ration the food. Some days we get to eat more, some days we get less, and some days we get nothing. It’s just the way it is.” Britta seems more impatient with me today, which is totally unlike her. She normally has much more tolerance of everyone’s moods.
“Sorry,” I repeat. She makes me feel bad for complaining, like a child complaining to her mother that she didn’t get any candy. Little brat me, huh?
“It is okay. We all miss things. It is harder some days than others, no?” She smiles at me and I reciprocate. Her accent also seems stronger today than before, or maybe it’s just me becoming more aware of these people as individuals and not just as a group.
“You know what I miss?” We all look at Josie. We all miss things, and I guess I just assumed that the
y would all be the same things.
“Nights out chilling with my friends.” She doesn’t smile when she says it, but looks down at her hands. “Relaxing and having fun. I mean, there’s just no down time, you know? No break from it all. Sometimes I just want to forget about all this stuff, laugh, and have fun again.”
JD puts an arm around her and pulls her close, kissing the top of her head affectionately. I think it’s the first time I’ve seen him being affectionate with her, come to think of it. Hard ass!
“I miss Sunday mornings.” JD looks around at us all. Some of us nod, some of us (okay, just me) raise an eyebrow in confusion.
“Just Sundays? Or is there another day of the week that you were particularly fond of, pre-apocalypse?” I snort. Since no one laughs with me, I figure they either think I’m an asshole or they know better than to mess with JD.
“I hadn’t finished,” he replies curtly. “As I was saying, I miss Sunday mornings…” He looks at me to see if I’m going to interrupt again, but I hold my hands up in fake surrender. “Waking up to the warmth of your woman’s body next to you, and before you have even opened your eyes, you let her scent wash over you. You pull her close and kiss her good morning, your arms wrapped around each other as you enjoy a moment of pure blissful relaxation with each other’s closeness, and the moment isn’t ruined by having to get up every two fucking minutes to shoot yet another of those dead fuckers.”
We all laugh. Even JD smiles, which is another first. Josie looks up at him fondly through her thick lashes. He looks down at her and kisses her on the forehead again. His hands are on either side of her face, and she melts into his touch. I blush and look away from the romantic gesture, and my eyes fall on Mikey. He’s looking at me in a way that makes me uncomfortable. Kind of like a panther stalking its prey. I look down at my shoes, feeling like I’m being undressed by Mr. Seductiveness over there.
“I miss taking a hot bath,” Britta is the next to speak and break the moment that JD has created. “I used to love taking a hot bath, and I smell now. I hate it. We all smell!”
We all laugh again. It’s true. We really do smell. Especially Emily right now; I really do have to tell her.
“I miss baths, and showers. I just miss being clean. I stink!” Emily looks up at me mournfully, like an injured lamb going to slaughter. I should tell her not to be so dumb, that it’s not that bad of a smell...but it is that bad, and she does need to wash. So I nod at her instead and she glares back at me.
“Sorry, but you do,” I grin, and she replies by pushing me off my chair.
“I miss being safe,” Duncan says darkly. “I miss being able to just walk around without a care in the world. I hate that we’re constantly in danger, that we have to watch our backs every second of the day. If it’s not zombies, it’s the Forgotten. I’m sick of it. I just want to feel safe again, I want us all to.” His anger rises as he continues. “We deserve that much, don’t we? I mean, this isn’t living, it’s existing.”
His hands ball into fists by his sides. He seems really pissed now, not just angry.
“So are you coming, then? To the hub?” Mikey takes the moment to swoop in and pounce on his prey, looking at him seriously. And here I was thinking I was the deer he was stalking. All the lightheartedness from our previous discussion is seemingly forgotten.
Duncan nods. “Yes, I’ll come.”
Mikey smiles widely—happy, I guess, that he finally got his way. He looks around at the group as if sizing us all up, his eyes resting on me for a moment too long before he speaks.
“Great. Well, let’s do this, then. So Duncan, JD, Crunch, and I will go to the hub this morning, clear the place of as many deaders as we can, and scrounge up some new gear.” He smiles.
“Wait, why the hell isn’t Nina going?” Crunch snaps, coming back into the room. I can’t help but agree with her.
“Yeah, why the hell aren’t I going?”
Both Crunch and I lock stares for a moment before she realizes that this wasn’t my doing, and we decide to turn our angry glares on Mikey.
He holds his hands up defensively. “Whoa, calm down, ladies. Someone needs to stay here and protect the others, in case we don’t come back. Nina’s good at fighting.”
“Just not good enough to come with you?” I retaliate.
“Britta’s a good fighter,” Crunch bites back.
“Yeah, but I sprained my wrist yesterday. I can hardly grip the ropes to get to my bunk, never mind hold a weapon and fight,” Britta interjects. “I would love to come and help in any way, but…” She shrugs, letting her words die off.
“I bet Josie’s a good fighter.” I look at JD.
“She’s not going. End of.” With that he looks away from me.
I glance at Josie, who offers me a sympathetic smile.
I start to argue that it isn’t fair, but Mikey holds a hand up to silence me.
“I know what you’re going to say, so save your breath. JD’s not going to change his mind about it, and I’m not going to force the issue with him. Just drop it.”
I scowl harder. “I’m going.”
“Look I’m not willing to risk everybody’s lives.” Mikey crosses his arms over his chest.
“But you’re quite willing to risk my life and not hers?” Crunch interrupts.
Crunch stares at him, her jaw grinding angrily before she grabs her bottle of water and storms off again, giving me the final blast from her blues. JD and Mikey exchange a look, of which I miss the meaning.
I huff. “I’m going with you. I told you the last time this was brought up that I was going, and I have not changed my mind about it. I don’t want, or expect, any special treatment from any of you.” I look at Mikey, and if looks could kill I think he would have croaked by now. Fortunately for him, they can’t. He attempts to argue back, but then stops when he realizes that I mean business.
I don’t need anyone helping me; I can look after myself. I certainly don’t need some guy with a crush trying to protect me and making others in our group hate me.
“Fine,” Mikey replies tensely, clearly not happy about me going at all.
Well he can just suck it.
Twenty.
I start to load up my backpack with bits and pieces that I think might be useful, but finally decide that the only thing I’m going to need is a weapon. Everything else is pointless. Water, Band-Aids, bandages—what’s really the point in any of this shit if I fall or get trapped? I may as well leave them with Emily. She could end up needing them more than I do.
My weapon of choice? My butcher’s knife. Yeah, it sucks and it’s pretty fucking blunt now, but I don’t seem to have an awful lot of choice since there aren’t any nice weaponry shops around anymore. Anyway, it’s gotten me out of quite a few sticky situations so far, so maybe I should be more content with my weapon.
When I see everyone else’s weapons, though, I can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy. JD has two scythes. There’s a hand-held one that looks small and brutal and a larger one with a long wooden handle. Duncan has a pistol of some sort, and a shotgun strapped to his back. Crunch has a sharp-looking curved knife, and my eyes widen at it. It. Is. Awesome. She smiles at me in answer to my drooling stare.
“It’s a Kukri knife. My dad used to collect old weapons and shit; history-type stuff. It’s from the Ghurkha’s army dudes, or something like that anyway. He had no respect for anything but his damn weapons. Always used to say that they would save our lives one day, but I think he meant from goons who would be knocking on our front door, not deaders.”
She actually seems genuinely pleased for the first time since I’ve met her. If she’s pleased to have a deadly kick-ass weapon or pleased that she has something that I want, I’m not sure. I guess this is just another side to her fractured personality.
I look at Mikey and realize that he has the best weapon, and one that I want most of all: a machete.
I want it. I want it. I want it! I almost stamp my feet in frustration.
/> It’s long, sharp, and looks extremely deadly. My salivating goes to a whole new level. And Mikey, well, he just looks like something out of a cool comic book. He’s changed into a short-sleeved black T-shirt and is wearing a harness of some sort that comes across his shoulders and across his back. With his biceps bulging and his shaved head, I can’t help but feel an attraction to him. Damn it!
“Put your tongue away,” Crunch bites out at me.
Mikey looks at my knife with a deep frown. “You can’t be serious?”
“What?” I ask, pretending that I don’t know that I am seriously under-skilled, and lacking in the cool-looking weapon department.
“That’s all you have?” He gestures with his bad-ass machete.
I look down at my weapon hand as if I had forgotten that my knife was even there. “This? Yeah. This is deadly as hell, I’ll have you know.” I almost snort at my own comment. Yeah, really deadly, pfft!
“It doesn’t even look sharp, Nina,” Mikey purses his lips together in a failed attempt to hold in his words. “Look at it!” He gestures angrily again.
“It’s fine,” I snap back.
“Nina…”
“Mikey, we need to go. We’re losing daylight. If she’s prepared to risk her life with that piece of crap, then so be it.” With that, JD turns and hugs Josie goodbye, whispering something into her ear and making her smile.
Mikey and I glare at each other for a second or two, neither of us willing to back down, though I know for my own safety, I probably should. I mean, he’s right—damn him.
Idiot! Me, not him. Well, maybe him too.
How the hell did they all get such totally badass weapons, anyway? What kind of stuff could be over at the hub that would be cooler than these?
Crunch smirks and follows Duncan and JD, ready to climb down. Mikey sheathes his long machete and walks over to me, his steps cautious. He stands directly in front of me, his eyes boring into mine with a look of resignation. He reaches for my hand, and I think about resisting but don’t. Taking my knife from my hand, he unhooks a sling from his side and passes it to me. Inside is a shorter-looking machete. It’s not as big and cool as the other one, but I couldn’t swing that thing anyway. He walks away without saying another word.
Odium (The Dead Saga.) Page 14