The Life Beyond

by Susanne Winnacker

  Tyler nodded. “I’m pretty sure.”

  “Good. So we’ll drive on the I-15 until we have no choice but to leave the road. Since we don’t know exactly where the fence is, we’ll probably have to stay offroad for a while,” I said.

  Joshua frowned. “Tyler, do you know how close we can get to the fence without being spotted by helicopters or other surveillance?”

  “I — I don’t know. A few miles maybe.”

  “But what if they monitor the whole region, not just the fence area?” Rachel asked.

  Nobody said anything. If we got caught, the military wouldn’t send us off with a simple warning.

  “We’ll just have to be careful,” Joshua said eventually. “We have to focus on finding the tunnel. Without it, this whole thing is doomed anyway.”

  The word ‘Doomed’ felt like it might become the theme of our mission. I closed my eyes briefly and took a deep breath before I spoke again. “Once we’ve found the tunnel, we’ll crawl through it like Tyler did when he escaped from the labs. And from there we’ll have to follow you, Tyler.”

  Joshua and I crept back to the main building and into the room where everyone was sleeping. The electricity wasn’t working, so we had to feel our way around in the dark. Rhythmic breathing and snores echoed around us as we crossed the room to a free spot. We lay down on the sleeping bag on the old wooden floor. The summer’s heat wasn’t as oppressive inside at night, but it was still warm enough that we didn’t need anything to cover ourselves. I rested my head on Joshua’s chest. He tangled his fingers in my hair and started stroking my head. My eyelids drooped as I relaxed against him. But even his closeness couldn’t make me forget what was to come.

  Three hours, lots of twisting and turning and little sleep later, I scribbled a hasty note. Nobody stirred, though Mia kept muttering in her sleep. Bobby had pulled his sleeping bag over his head so I could only make out a lump in the form of his body. I wished I could see his blonde mop of hair. I wanted to go over to hug him and Mia goodbye but I couldn’t risk it. Even though I knew I might never hug them again.

  We met the others in the inner courtyard. It was still dark outside. Rachel and Tyler had been on guard duty all night. Their faces were drawn and their eyelids drooping.

  “Did you pack everything?” Joshua asked as we stopped in front of them.

  Tyler nodded, yawning. “Water and food are in the trunk. Weapons are on the backseat.”

  “Nobody noticed anything?” I asked, looking up at the dark windows of the mission.

  “No. Being on guard has its perks,” Rachel said with a small smile.

  The first rays illuminated the horizon as we crammed into the car and drove off. I couldn’t help wondering if Mom would be worried when she found the letter. Or would she be in too much of a state to care at all?

  I let down the window. Cool morning air whirled my hair around. Fog cloaked the surrounding streets and colored the sky a dull grey. Joshua drummed a rhythm on the steering wheel and I let it pull me into drowsiness.

  Thump. Thump. Thump thump. Thump.

  My thoughts turned as foggy as our surroundings. I wished the sun would finally show and dispell the mist.

  Thump. Thump. Thump Thump. Thump.

  Highway 101 stretched before us. Weeds peeked through the cracks and the occasional deer dashed into the bushes when we drew close.

  After hours, lush green hills cloaked by fog turned to vast nothingness - desertlike plains beaten by the sun. The air blowing into the car felt like it was coming out of a hairdryer. Interstate 15 led through the Mojave desert. Carcasses – the flesh burned off by the sun – littered the road and beyond. Now and then we had to veer past a broken car or a traffic sign.

  We passed a street sign promoting Calico, a ghosttown in California. I smiled grimly. Who needed a ghosttown in a ghoststate? After several more miles we saw another sign, this time advertising a Walmart. I sat up a little, a trickle of excitement running through my veins.

  “Joshua, do you think it’s worth us stopping there? See if there’s any gas or more supplies? I wonder if we might be able to find some cameras, or something we could use to film stuff on the other side of the fence,” I asked.

  He looked over at me and smiled. “Good idea,” he said. “Let’s do it.”

  I relaxed back in my seat. Slick with sweat, my shirt and jeans clung to me and soon a layer of dust covered my skin. I drew patterns on it until my fingers were sticky with grime.

  A moan came from the backseat. It was the first sign of complaint from Rachel. Her dark hair fell in damp ringlets against her pale face, her skin glistening. “It must be 110 outside,” she said, pushing her bangs back. “It’s making me feel sick.”

  I looked at the clock on the dashboard.

  4 hours and 56 minutes, that’s how long we’d been on the road.

  296 minutes of silence, sweat and stale air.

  “Do you need us to stop?” I asked.

  Rachel pressed an arm against her stomach. “I’m not sure.”

  “There’s an old Walmart ahead,” Joshua said. “Sherry thinks we should try stopping there – see if there’s any gas, and supplies. Do you think you can make it until then?”

  She shook her head hastily, eyes panicked.

  “Joshua, stop!” I said.

  He slammed his foot on the break and we jerked to a halt. Rachel stumbled out of the car and bent over, starting to retch. Tyler held her hair back as she threw up.

  Joshua and I got out, exchanging a look. Something was wrong with Rachel.

  Suddenly I heard knocking. It sounded like it was coming from the car. I drew my gun. Had something gotten tangled up in the undercarriage?

  “What’s that?” I asked.

  The knocking turned into an insistent hammering.

  “It’s coming from the trunk,” Joshua said. He grabbed the gun from his waistband and moved toward the car.

  “Be careful,” I said, aiming my gun at the trunk.

  With a quick move, Joshua opened the trunk before jumping back, body coiled for attack. He relaxed when he saw what was inside.

  It was Bobby. I lowered my gun, the air rushing from my lungs. I felt a sudden burst of relief but it was quickly followed by intense panic. “What the hell are you doing here?”

  He heaved his legs out of the trunk and carefully stood up. His clothes and hair were drenched with sweat.

  “I overheard you in the chapel,” he said, his voice hoarse. “I want to help. I have to help. I’m sick of staying behind.”

  He swayed suddenly and held onto the car for balance. I went to help him and touched his forehead. He was burning up. “Joshua, he needs water.”

  I brushed the hair from his soaking skin. “God, Bobby, what have you done?” I whispered, hardly able to believe this was happening. “Who’s going to take care of Mom and Mia now? They need you.” I thought of Mia, waking up, thinking we’d both abandoned her. Of Mom, realizing she might lose us, too.

  Guilt flitted across Bobby’s pale face. “I — I’m sure Karen …” But his words trailed off as the doubt crept in.

  Joshua stared inside the trunk before slamming it shut. His brows dipped into a V and a muscle in his jaw twitched.

  “Where are our supplies?” he asked.

  Bobby stared at the ground, giving a small shrug.

  “Nothing,” Joshua spat. “Not a single bottle of water or can of beans.”

  “Bobby?” My voice vibrated like the string of a guitar.

  “I unloaded them so I’d fit in,” he said, sheepishly.

  “You threw away our supplies?” My mouth went dry.

  298 minutes since I’d drank water. 17,880 seconds – too long in the summer heat. And Bobby needed water as soon as possible.

  “Great, just great.” Joshua pushed his hand through his hair. He turned around and stalked off, dust whirling around his sneakers. His shoulders were stiff with tension. I thought about going after him but had a feeling that he needed a moment to c
alm down.

  “So we’re out here without any food or water?” Tyler asked. Rachel leaned against him, her skin pale, breathing deeply. She looked terrible.

  “It looks that way,” I muttered. This journey was off to a bad start already and we hadn’t even reached the fence. Maybe this was a sign. A warning. I pushed the thought out of my mind. Joshua was walking back toward us; I had to stay strong.

  “Look, let’s get to the store and see if we can find something there. And I want to look for some cameras or recording equipment to film the fence with. We might even be able to get some medicine for Rachel,” I said, sounding more positive than I felt. Rachel gave me a grateful smile. I looked over at Bobby but he wouldn’t meet my gaze.

  “How far away from the fence are we?” Joshua asked.

  Tyler pulled the map from his jeans pocket, running his finger over a road leading closer to Las Vegas. “We have to follow the interstate.” He pointed at a bend in the road. “We leave it here and keep driving straight ahead. After a few miles, we’ll see the fence. It’s maybe two more hours by car.”

  Only two more hours. We could have made it there by nightfall, but with Bobby added to the mix, we could kiss that plan good-bye. “We have to take Bobby back to Santa Barbara. He can’t come with us,” I said.

  “Hey, that’s unfair,” said Bobby. “I want to help! I can’t stand watching you go off, while I sit around doing nothing. You can’t tell me what to do.”

  “We’ll see about that!” I shouted.

  “Listen, guys,” Tyler interrupted. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”

  I glared at Bobby, before following Joshua and Tyler who had moved a few steps away from the car.

  “I don’t think Rachel is well enough to continue,” Tyler whispered. His voice broke. “I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She said she was feeling kind of shaky while we were on guard duty, but I thought it was just nerves. I’m sorry. I think I should take her back. Bobby can come with us.”

  I looked over to where Rachel was now slumped in the backseat, her eyes closed, breathing heavily. Bobby waited outside, arms folded.

  “You’re right,” I said. “But how are Joshua and I going to find the fence?”

  “Take the map.” Tyler handed it to Joshua. “You know how to get there now.”

  “Yeah, I suppose,” Joshua said with a glare at Bobby. “But we’ll have to find a car first and some more fuel since someone thought it was a good idea to throw out our reserve canister.”

  Tyler leaned into the car to check the fuel gauge. “There’s fuel for about 20 miles in the tank.”

  Bobby stood listening to us awkwardly. The way he shifted his feet and kept his eyes on the ground I almost felt sorry for him.

  “Get in. We don’t want to waste anymore time,” I said.

  Bobby squeezed in between Tyler and Rachel on the backseat and I rode shotgun.

  “You’re lucky we let you ride in the car with us and didn’t put you back into the trunk,” Joshua said as he started the engine.

  Bobby jutted his chin out and crossed his arms over his chest, but he stayed quiet.

  The purr of the engine filled the silence. The tension in the car was so thick, it almost made breathing difficult.

  Bobby had sunk deeper into the backseat, shamefaced. His eyes darted to meet mine in the rear view mirror. He was cracking his knuckles, something he used to do as a little kid before he started crying.

  I looked away and watched the desert fly by.

  I perched on the wall and let my gaze wander over the garden. Soon we’d have to leave Safe-haven forever.

  Laughter carried over to me. Tyler and Rachel strolled toward the apple tree, shoulder to shoulder.

  I ducked but couldn’t stop watching. I was so close to them, but they were too focused on each other to notice me. Tyler pointed at something near a branch. I didn’t know what they’d spotted but Rachel smiled. Tyler hurried back to the house and returned with our jar of honey. He dripped some of it on Rachel’s outstretched palm. I could almost taste its sweetness on my tongue.

  Something flashed close to them – fluttering wings. A tiny hummingbird hovered inches above Rachel’s hand, attracted by the honey. Its feathers shimmered blue and green. Beautiful.

  Rachel looked happy as she watched the bird. But Tyler had only eyes for her. Slowly a smile spread on his face.

  Chapter 4

  Joshua eased the car into the shade under the gas station roof. The store was across the parking lot.

  “I think we should split up,” I said. “Tyler, can you stay with Rachel and try to fill up the car with gas?” That way they could both be in the shade and Rachel wouldn’t have to walk anywhere. “Joshua and I will search inside for supplies.”

  “What about me?” Bobby said.

  I wanted to keep an eye on him, but who knew what might be lurking inside the store? It might be too dangerous to take him with us. I hesitated.

  “He can stay with us,” Tyler said.

  I smiled gratefully. “Thanks. Bobby, let’s check the gas station for water first,” I said with a nod toward him. That would give me the chance to talk to him alone.

  “I’ll go look for a second car while you do that,” said Joshua. “Tyler, could you help me with this first? After all, it’ll be you driving Rachel and Bobby back.” Tyler joined Joshua and together they went to inspect the three abandoned cars lined up in front of the garage, covered in dust. Rachel leaned against the wall of the building.

  Bobby and I walked up to the gas station. The door was locked shut, and all of the windows were intact.

  “Watch your back!” Bobby called. I turned and saw he was holding up a huge rock, so heavy that he had to carry it with both hands. He swung his arms, sending the rock flying – right through the window of the gas station store. The glass shattered, flying to the ground and smashing loudly. It felt weirdly good to watch something get destroyed.

  I gave Bobby a thumbs up. “Good work.”

  Bobby and I stepped over the shards of broken glass and into the store. The shelves were still in place and partly stocked, but most of the food looked like it would poison us if we ate a bite, especially what was left of the sandwiches. They had turned into green dust.

  Bottles of water, cola and all kinds of other drinks were still lined up in the refrigerator. The heat had evaporated most of the water and left only a brown syrupy residue in the coke bottles. That wouldn’t help with the rough feeling in my throat. I took two water bottles, which were still half full, and handed one to Bobby and brought the other to my lips. The liquid was warm and tasted of plastic but it felt like liquid heaven as it slid down my throat. I couldn’t stop myself from drinking more.

  “Disgusting,” Bobby spluttered and wiped his hands over his mouth.

  “Maybe we can find some more water in the mall,” I said, already feeling better.

  I checked the chocolate bars for their edibility but they’d dissolved into unidentifiable brownish lumps covered with a white film. A sniff at them made me put them back onto the shelf.

  I looked over at Bobby. He had torn open a bag of potato chips and was busy stuffing them into his mouth. I watched him take another gulp of lukewarm water before he left the bag where he’d found it. Now was my chance.

  “Bobby,” I said eventually. “Why did you hide in the trunk?”

  His eyes darted to mine. “I just want to help. It’s my turn to do something for our family. You don’t know how guilty I feel that you and Dad risked your lives when you left the bunker. I felt so useless, watching TV with Mia and listening to Mom and Grandma arguing while you were out there trying to find food.”

  “Bobby —”

  “I’m not doing that again,” he cut in. “I can’t stand the thought of letting you do this by yourself. I have to do something.”

  “You are doing something. Mom and Mia need someone to take care of them.”

  “But that’s not enough. You’ve risked too much already. Pl
ease, Sherry, let me go with Joshua to the other side. You can go back and look after Mia and Mom.”

  He looked so desperate but he was asking for the impossible. I put my hand on his shoulder. “Bobby, I have to go with Joshua. We know what we’re doing. I don’t think you realize what you’d be getting yourself into. And besides, Joshua would never agree.”

  “But —” he began, his voice pleading.

  “No,” I said finally. “Promise me you’ll be strong for Mom and Mia. They need you more than I do.”

  He shook off my hand. “Okay,” he muttered. Keeping his head down, he loaded his arms with water bottles and walked out.

  A twinge of pity went through me. Taking the last water bottle I went outside to Rachel. “Here, drink some water,” I said, holding it out to her. She took the bottle but didn’t drink any of it.

  Joshua and Tyler were bent over the engine of a baby blue Ford Mustang, covered in dust and rust. I walked over to them.

  “It’s not working, is it?” I whispered.

  Joshua straightened with a sigh. “It needs oil.”

  I nodded toward the oil bottles scattering the ground. “What about them?”

  “Useless. They’ve been in the sun for years.”

  “Let’s look inside. We need to look for cameras and food anyway,” I said.

  “Don’t worry,” Tyler said. “I’ve got this covered. I’ll search the gas station for tools. I think I can fix it.”

  Joshua slung a backback over his shoulder and took my hand. “We’ll be back soon,” I said, my eyes on Bobby, who sat beside Rachel. He didn’t look up.

  Joshua didn’t speak as we walked toward the entrance to the large Walmart. Our steps rang out over the empty parking lot. Eventually I couldn’t take the silence anymore. “Are you angry with me?”

  “Not at you. But your brother —” He shook his head.

  “I know. It was stupid of him,” I said. “But I do understand.”

  “You do?”

  “Yes. Put yourself in his situation. What would you have done?”