“Thank you, but truly, you owe me nothing.”
“I dinna ken if it will fit. I charged my mother with getting the thing made, wasn’t sure about...the sizing.” Much willpower was expended to keep his gaze from raking over her cloak-covered body.
And the shocks just kept on coming though he’d yet to understand why she hadn’t requested his departure.
She turned again, setting the package down on the table, shoving the lace and fabric bits aside, and then removed her shawl. Alec hadn’t moved from the door that she came close to him, garbed in only that shapeless but very provocative nightgown, and reached up to hang her shawl on the peg hook next to his shoulder.
He didn’t turn and ogle her, but the close-up available to his periphery suggested the thing might be near see-through in the right light. She leaned both hands against the wall and toed off her boots, She left him again, leaving the scent of roses and something else he could not name in her wake, moving across the room to fetch something from a pouch hanging from that bedpost, before taking a seat at the table directly in front of him.
She stared at him now, confronted him really. “Why have you come, Alec?”
Yet more shock, wrought by her bluntness, seemingly bereft of any animosity.
He didn’t answer quick enough, that she furthered, “We both know the frock might have waited until tomorrow.”
And all the words rehearsed in his head fled with dastardly cowardice that he was left to utter what remained at the fore. “It’s no’ finished.”
She nodded, obviously requiring no explanation for it, but said nothing.
Alec wanted only to look at her. Instantly, he knew this was his new favorite image of her. He had several already, but just now, she was ethereal and delicate. She sat upon the stool sideways to the table, her gauzy nightrail creamy and covering most of her. Her feet were bare, tucked up onto the wrung of the stool. She held an old bone comb in her hand, which had yet to be used, her hand and the comb laid at rest in her lap. Her hair was wet, darkened and disheveled, the mass of it pulled over one shoulder, the ends curling softly. The generous fire in the hearth cast the entire cottage in shifting shades of a pleasing orange glow, softening everything in its light. Her face was in shadows, the fire at her back. Alec was, honestly, amazed to see no anger or complaint for his untoward presence, only the question. She was still and quiet, her face softened. Her blue-eyed gaze held his, showing no wariness at all. She was breathtakingly lovely just now.
He’d never begged for a thing in his life, not even his life during his captivity, but he thought he might beg now, for her. But no, that wasn’t why he’d come. The words returned, heartened by the fact that she’d not thrown him out. Pushing himself away from the door, he stepped further inside.
“I need to apologize for my behavior of yesterday afternoon.” He shrugged, ambled over to the hearth, perusing the things set atop it—those cups and bowls he’d known before, char cloth and flint and, three goose feathers—and said, “There’s many reasons for it, but none of them seem worthy or justifiable in hindsight.” He faced her again, the table between them, thought it wise to make clear, “I dinna rescind my anger that you’d walk off to Loch Oykill on your own. It’s a dangerous world, and you ken it well as any. I’d rather you took better precautions.” But then, the crux of it was more difficult to put into words. “Still, the other...I needn’t have provoked you. Aye, but I ken I did. I’m no’ sure what happens whenever you...we...stand so close that I can hear your heart beating, or why it puts me in that frame of mind that I feel the need to prove to you that you do want my kiss.” He met her gaze, taking his from where it had sat upon Henry’s shoes, saw that she was attentive but yet unreadable, so very still. He sighed. “At any rate—"
“Are you not going to kiss me again?”
Flummoxed, Alec stared hard at her. His voice deepened. “Is that you asking me to?”
She nodded.
Irrationally, his response was this: “Christ, Katie, I just—haven’t even—finished giving my apology for the way I—”
She stood from the stool and walked around the table. She didn’t come very close but stayed at the corner near to him. “You want it to be a choice I make, not one you feel you need to convince me of. I’m making a choice.”
Jesu, but she was remarkable.
He ignored the why of it, determined he would take nothing for granted. His pulse quickened and all the certainty returned, and all the caution evaporated. “Show me.”
I AM FEARLESS.
A leap of faith, Malcolm had called it when she’d believed what he’d said, that Swordmair would be better for her. He’d been right, and but for her own courage, she’d not have known.
She closed the small space between them.
There’s that fearless Katie Oliver I ken.
I am fearless.
And he is so beautiful, his earlier unease so damnably beguiling—so enlightening. And then so empowering. He wasn’t a predator, his emotions unengaged, she believed now. Funny, that she’d denied so much of what she felt, believing that he’d only toyed with her. She wasn’t yet ready to explore it all, didn’t want to hasten into any false hope of what the future might bring, but she vowed earlier as she’d walked through the door, leaving it open for him to enter as well, that she would go forth courageously, lest something wonderful be left in the wake with her fear. What little she did understand about the way her heart leapt at merely the sight of him, the way her pulse quickened, the delight she’d known from only his kiss suggested she’d be a fool to ignore what else might come.
She stopped in front of him and tilted her head up to him, holding his compelling gaze, her breaths coming rapidly. Finally he moved, lifting his hands to take hers, threading their fingers together. But he made no move to kiss her, didn’t take her in his arms, only held her attention with his simmering gaze.
He was either proceeding slowly as to not frighten her or he was giving her the opportunity to change her mind. Neither was necessary. Yet, the boldness was new and her heartbeat was threatening to drown out all else that she simply took the last step and melted into him, laying her head on his chest.
He let go of her hands, now at their sides and she closed her eyes with the bliss that came when his strong arms encircled her. He’d kissed her and touched her but had never simply held her. It was a glorious prelude, his arms powerful and warm, the embrace both gentle and then intoxicating. Katie folded her elbows, resting her hands against him. Beneath his tunic, she felt immediately that his heart was pounding in a pattern similar to her own. Miraculously, this calmed her. He was either excited or nervous, but both suggested he was not immune, not unaffected.
“Ask me again,” he said after a while, his chin pressed onto the top of her head.
Of course, she knew what he wanted.
“Kiss me.” To her own ears, it sounded like begging. And she didn’t care.
He loosened his hold at the same time she lifted her face to him.
His hands settled onto her hips, tightening in the fabric of her gown as he lowered his head to her until her lips met his. This kiss was slow, achingly so, just his mouth moving across hers, until Katie leaned in, lifting her hands from his chest to slide them around his shoulders. She opened her mouth first, gave him her tongue, let him do glorious things to it, to her. It grew, the kiss, until she was clinging to him and her chest was on fire. Blindly, not breaking the kiss, he rid himself of his sword and belt. His arm snaked around her again, lifting her up against him, moving them away from the door. She thought he would lay her down on the bed. Instead, he sat at the edge with Katie in his lap. He arranged her legs so that she straddled him, her knees bent into the thin mattress. And all the while, he continued to ravish her mouth.
His fingers left both sides of her waist at the same time, both hands sliding up between them to cup her breasts through the thin fabric of her nightrail. He lifted her breasts, splayed his fingers around them and they groaned
together. She pulled back only so much that his hands were given free rein, the silent offer not ignored that he began to tug at the neckline. The gauzy linen fell away, coaxed down from one shoulder. He played with her nipples but briefly with his fingers, replacing them with his tongue and teeth, that Katie arched her back and reveled in his touch and her own reactions, nipples hardening, toes curling, and a wetness coming between her legs. Alec bared the other breast, which sent her nightgown dropping to her waistline. The house was yet cool but his eyes upon her lit more fires within. He took a moment to hold both breasts in his hands, letting the soft firelight show him the modest display. Katie didn’t even care if he liked what he saw, so long as he continued to touch her and tease her.
“Perfect,” he said, his breath hot on her naked skin, his lips following his eyes, adoring her breasts once more.
And when he returned to her lips, kissing her greedily, his fingers curved around her bottom, drawing her directly onto his groin. Katie whimpered and tugged at the fabric of her night rail, wanting everything out of the way. His hands found her narrow waist again, grinding her against him, until she did so on her own and his warm hands slid around her back while his mouth found her neck. She liked the feel of his strong hands upon her naked skin, like very well how he held her so tightly, claimed her, made her ache as she never had before.
“Ask me for more,” he demanded.
And oh, how she loved the sound of his voice just then, husky and hungry, breathless and needful.
“Yes, more.” Please don’t stop. She rocked her hips on him. “All of it.”
“I need to be inside you.” More urgency.
She could stop it now. She need only say, No, that was enough.
But it wasn’t enough.
“Yes. Alec, please.”
“Jesu.”
Scooting back, making room for her hand to delve between them, she touched him. She rubbed her hand against his breeches, whimpering at how hard he was for her, for this. She hadn’t any idea how his breeches were closed, what held them, but found ties and yanked at them with some determination, wanting so badly to feel the heat of him against her hand. Her mouth found his just as her fingers met with his erection. And for the first time in her life, she was wild with need. She urged herself against him, suckled his tongue, and moved her hand up and down him all the while moving her hips in a motion she craved, but with him inside her, deep inside her. Without any prompting, she moved aside the layers of fabric between him and her. He shifted, lifting himself only to lower his breeches and drawers, and then his fingers gripped the bare skin of her hips. Katie released him and settled her hands on his hard shoulders, positioning herself directly above him until his cock touched her entrance.
She met his gaze, realized his jaw was clenched, holding himself in check. His attention was heavy upon her, the depths of his dark eyes filled with a matching need. His hands flexed, lowering her just as she pushed herself down. Their eyes locked while she slid down onto him, until he was deep inside her. Every nerve in her body screamed and every bone became liquid, but she could make no sound. She closed her eyes, languid and yet aroused, just letting her body feel him. Tentatively, she lifted herself and then pressed down, her nails pressing into his shoulders. Her eyes opened when a rumble of a groan escaped him.
“Jesu, Katie, you feel like heaven.”
He allowed her to move at her own speed, his hands only set upon her lean hips but not moving her.
But it had been so long, and he was so magnificent, his steady gaze nearly undoing her, that Katie soon began to move to a greater rhythm, propelled by her increasing need. He found her breasts again, lavishing them with attention, his fingers hardening her nipples once more. He pumped upward into her at the same time and slowed only when she cried out, as her release came. It smothered her, overwhelmed her. She sank into him, not yet still, wanting to wrest every bit of this moment, whimpering into his shoulder, quivering as she came.
He continued to move, and then stood, holding her firmly around the waist as he transferred her onto her back on the narrow bed and settled between her legs, burying himself inside her once again. And it started all over, the building desire with each thrust. He kissed her savagely, his hands fisted on either side of her. Katie held his face, returning the brutal and astonishing kiss, hardly able to understand what was happening, how she could be so aroused again. He withdrew, pulling his cock nearly completely out of her and thrust again. And again and again while she lifted her hips to meet each surge, until he stiffened atop her just as another orgasm washed over her. He groaned into the side of her face, his breath hot, and said her name, his tone filled with worship.
She whispered, “Alec” with some wonder, not quite returned to clarity.
She couldn’t move, didn’t want to, let her mind stay right here, sated and bewitched.
She would be sorry, she knew. But not just yet.
Chapter Fifteen
He didn’t want to move, but to do that again with her.
Bluidy hell, but she was a wonder. He’d expected passion, to match her fiery eyes, but he hadn’t been prepared for the depths of her desire or her willingness to act upon it.
He lifted himself, just enough to glance down at her. Her eyes were closed yet, the fingers of one hand pressed against her lips, as if trying to absorb more sensations yet. Her brow was uncreased and her lashes unmoving upon her cheeks. He raked an admiring gaze over the line of her jaw and her naked shoulder. She was, at this very moment, the most beautiful he’d ever seen her.
Alec pressed his lips to her cheek. She purred and opened her eyes. He tried to read her gaze, but the firelight was behind him and he saw only golden shadows. But then she was Katie and soon enough, he was sure he detected a growing worry in her blinking gaze, even as she tried to smile for him. While he was yet so deep inside her, while his pulse had not even begun to return to anything near normal, he assumed she was already knowing some regret.
“Dinna do that,” he pleaded. “No’ yet. I know you’ll want to give yourself grief, but no’ yet.” He kissed her again, sent his tongue inside her mouth to stir her, to take back her mind.
She allowed it for a while.
But it couldn’t be put off indefinitely, he knew.
With one last lingering kiss, he withdrew from her and settled at her side, laying his arm across her midsection. The slim bed forced him to remain very close to her. They remained clothed, save that all their garments were askew. Hell, he still wore his boots. Her flawless breasts and gorgeous legs were bared to him, as her nightrail was yet bunched around her waist. He would do it better next time, would undress her slowly, and learn and love every inch of her.
After a moment, he asked, “You want to do this now, get it all out?”
She knew very well to what he referred, what he’d already brought up. Still, she asked, “Do what?”
“List all the reasons we shouldn’t have done that, or all the reasons you’re sorry you did. I’d expect some overlap there.”
She gave him no quarrel for how light-hearted his tone was. But then, how could it not be? He’d just enjoyed—nae, lost himself in—some fairly spontaneous and admittedly spectacular lovemaking with her, felt as if he could slay dragons just about now.
But when she didn’t respond straight away, he said, “You’re afraid or upset. I dinna want—"
“I’m not...anything. Can we not talk about it?”
He rather was hoping to repeat it, and soon, so aye, he wanted to talk about it, was keen to settle her.
She sighed then, needing no further urging, but confessed, “I was so in love with life these past few weeks and now...this rather complicates things.”
“Complicates?”
“Pardon me, I should have prefaced that with the fact that I was willing and very agreeable...and I am not particularly sorry for...the act. But that I hadn’t thought past...this.” She hesitated, while Alec gently stroked the bare skin of her stomach in a small, c
ircular pattern. “I just didn’t want to live this way, didn’t want to start this way at Swordmair. I don’t want rumors to start. I don’t want people’s opinion of me to be clouded by this. Good grief, I don’t want Henry teased that his mother is a whore. Witch was bad enough.”
“Jesu, Katie.”
She turned in the crook of his shoulder to judge his reaction to this. Her face was alive with regret, or was that pain? Mayhap she only considered what she’d just said, or rather how awfully she’d just expressed her own thoughts.
“I’m sorry. I’ve not ever done this before—”
“You have a child, Katie, I dinna think you can claim—”
She shook her head. “Haven’t ever done it with anyone but my husband, simply for the sake of...”
“Aye, I recall. Coupling merely for the sake of coupling. Like animals.” He was wishing he’d not invited her to air her anxieties just now. Trying to control his own reaction to her bluntness, reminding himself this likely was new to her, that she would need time to adjust, Alec lifted himself and leaned over her. “For now, until you come to terms with it—whatever that might need or mean—can you no’ just kiss me again? I ken for me, I’m learning that I find a lot of answers in your kiss.”
While she digested this, her lips parting in some wonder at his words, and while she gave no indication that she might refuse him now, he kissed her.
“Might not be a bad idea for me to stay with you tonight,” he said against her lips after a while, neither unaware nor unaffected by her stiffening beneath him. “No’ for this again,” he clarified, lifting a brow as he added, “though I’d no deny you. I ken, though, you’ll want to push me away now, mayhap blame me for your own misplaced guilt. I will no’ have it.”
She cleared her throat and said in a level tone, “I don’t mean to ruin what was....”
He lifted a brow, but she did not finish. Alec gave an assist, aiming for levity lest she did indeed ruin the entire spectacular affair. “Earthshattering? Mind-blowing? Knee-knocking?”
The Love of Her Life (Highlander Heroes Book 6) Page 19