It was an enjoyable evening and as Molly lay listening to Frank’s steady breathing later in bed, she thought that if he stayed at home she would have to put Nathan out of her mind. She had made vows. She had to be faithful to her husband. Perhaps thinking positively about him being the father of her child would help.
She asked him about giving up the sea as they were unloading the secondhand furniture they had bought. ‘You’re not serious, Moll?’ Frank paused in the middle of the pavement, letting down his end of a sofa. ‘What would I do? I won’t be a docker. You have to be in with the right ones or there’s no chance of making a living. You’re treated like cattle, having to go in them pens, waiting to be picked out like you were prime beef.’
‘I wasn’t thinking of the docks,’ she said easily. ‘You stoke boilers at sea for a living, don’t you? What’s wrong with a wash house or a public baths? There’s a couple not far from here.’
He screwed up his face. ‘Women coming and going? They’re gossip shops. You don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ll stick with the sea, thanks very much. Conditions might be lousy and the pay could be better, and you know I hate leaving you, but the sea’s in my blood. I’ll tell you what, though,’ he said, once they had the sofa inside, ‘I’ll try and get on the Atlantic run. We’ll see more of each other then. Would you be happier with that?’
What could she say but yes?
With Christmas only a few days away, Molly was determined it was going to be a happy time for her and Frank. It would be the first one they had spent together. She had no intention of being persuaded to go to his mother’s. ‘I want to spend it here, just the two of us,’ she said in wheedling tones. ‘You were at sea last year, remember.’
‘I was hoping we’d go to Ma’s.’
She gave him a look and after a few minutes he said, ‘OK. I’ll give into you for this year because of the baby. I’ll just nip up there meself later in the day.’
Pleased to have got her way, she hugged him.
Late on Christmas Eve they went to St John’s Market, hoping to get some bargains. Molly bought a pair of rabbits for half a crown and potatoes at elevenpence a peck. Frank purchased two bottles of port for three shillings. ‘I’ll take one to Ma and you can have the other with a drop of lemonade. I’ll get a couple of bottles of beer from the pub for meself.’
Christmas Day passed peacefully and on Boxing Day Frank went to play football with some old mates. She was pleased to have the house to herself for a few hours. There was a Charles Dickens book she had borrowed from the Free Lending library to finish and rabbit pie to make for their dinner.
It was as she was rolling out pastry that Doris popped in. ‘Just come to say Ma’s invited you and Frank to our New Year’s Eve party. It’ll be fun. The whole family’ll be there.’
‘I’ll tell him. He’s not planning on going back to sea until New Year.’
But Frank was far from pleased when she mentioned the invitation. ‘We’re not going,’ he said firmly. ‘Ma wants me to first foot for her. Besides we’re invited to another party and I’ve accepted for both of us. It’s at Bernadette McGuire’s mother’s house. You remember Bernie? She came to our wedding.’ He placed his arms round Molly as she stood at the sink, peeling potatoes. ‘She’s just been widowed, poor kid. Husband died from galloping consumption so she’s moved back home. Brother’s home from India, too, invalided out of the army.’
Molly remembered Bernie all right. She was the one Ma’d had in mind to marry Frank. That was another thing the old woman had against her. She didn’t want to see Ma, certain it would lead to trouble, but realised she had no choice.
‘So he got you to come?’There was a triumphant gleam in Ma’s mud-coloured eyes. ‘What did I say to yer, Sadie?’ She turned to her neighbour who was sitting next to her in the overcrowded kitchen.
‘That he shouldn’t be letting her wear the trousers,’ said Mrs McGuire, hitching her enormous bosom higher as she fumbled with a strap. ‘But I’m not surprised she’s ashamed to show her face, losing the baby the way she did. If she’d listened to you yer’d be a grandma now.’
Molly had expected Frank to be at her side when facing his mother but they’d no sooner entered the house than he was seized upon by Mrs McGuire’s whey-faced daughter in her widow’s weeds. Now Molly felt vulnerable but steeled herself to say, ‘I don’t think that’s any of your business, Mrs McGuire. So why don’t you just leave me alone?’
‘That’s a lovely way to speak to yer elders!’ said the woman, sounding scandalised. ‘Yer want to get your Frank to give her a good clout round the earhole, Joan.’
‘Our Frank would do no such a thing. He’s not a violent man,’ said Ma, placing her glass of Guinness on top of the piano. ‘Tell me now, where’s the baby buried, Moll? I’d like to visit her little grave sometime.’
‘Why?’ she blurted out, flabbergasted.
‘She’s flesh of my flesh, isn’t she? I hope yer had her baptised before she went?’
‘Of course,’ said Molly, moistening her lips. ‘Mabel May.’
‘No saint’s name?’ Ma sighed gustily. ‘Baptised one of your lot then?’
Molly’s knees began to shake. She wasn’t in the mood for this. ‘Why not?’ she said defiantly. ‘We’re Christians too, you know.’
‘So yer say. But you don’t have the Pope. So where is she?’
Molly felt trapped. She did not want her mother-in-law poking her nose round Burscough Bridge.
‘Well?’ demanded Ma Payne when she didn’t answer.
‘St John’s,’ said Molly reluctantly. ‘There’s no gravestone or anything - and it’s a long way for you to go. You’d be wasting your time. You wouldn’t be able to find it.’
‘If I want to waste me time, I’ll waste it, girl.’ Ma jutted out her chin. ‘I’m sure the minister will help me.’
Molly did not know what else to say and knew she had to get away. Suddenly she saw Cath and Jimmy and made them her excuse. ‘You’ll have to forgive me. I want a word with your Cath.’ She turned, pushing her way between people, but would have avoided the couple if Cath had not seized her arm.
‘You’ve disappointed me, Moll,’ she said, shaking her head.
‘I bet Jimmy you wouldn’t show up here and you’ve let me down.’
‘You shouldn’t bet,’ she said. ‘Your ma’s got too much influence still over Frank.’
‘You don’t have to tell me that,’ drawled Cath, her arm linked through Jimmy’s. ‘Too much influence over everybody. That’s why I want out. She’s always telling me what I should and shouldn’t do. I was wondering if you could help me?’
‘Me?’ said Molly, startled. ‘In what way?’
‘By letting me have one of your spare rooms. I’ve been hearing all about the new house.’
‘But you don’t like your Frank.’
‘I don’t have to like him. He’ll be at sea most of the time. I want to be near Jimmy and I can give you something for my keep. That’ll be a help with you having a baby.’
‘Who told you?’ Molly glanced about, hoping nobody had heard. Frank would have a fit if somebody else went and told Ma.
‘Doris’s mother told Jimmy’s. They both think it’s lovely, with you having lost the last one.’
Molly sighed. ‘Talk about the blinking grapevine!’
‘So what about it? Can I come and live with you? I’d be company while Frank’s away. And I’ll be around to help when youthe baby.’
‘What do you know about babies?’
Cath smiled. ‘Nothing, but I’ve a good pair of legs to run for the midwife and I can boil kettles. Besides if you say no I’ll tell our Frank you’ve shares in Mr Collins’s company and how you quarrelled and he ran after you. You can’t have told him about it because then he’d have told Ma and I’d have heard.’
Molly darted Jimmy an angry look. ‘I thought it was only women who gossiped? That’s my private business, you know. I hope you haven’t told anyone else?’
He smiled.
‘No. And I’ll carry on not telling if you let Cath lodge with you. We can see more of each other then.’
‘This is blackmail,’ said Molly through gritted teeth. ‘But drop in tomorrow after you finish work, Cath, and we can talk about it.’
‘Thanks. We’re going off to the McNallys’ party now. It’ll be much more fun there.’ Cath winked and they left.
Frank materialised at Molly’s side, swaying slightly. ‘What were you and our Cath yacking about?’
Molly pinned on a smile, linking her arm through his. ‘Never mind her. What about Bernie monopolising you? I feel real jealous.’
‘No need, luv. It’s her brother, Charlie. He’s lost a hand, apparently, and is feeling a bit low so I’ve invited him and Bernie round to ours tomorrow.’
Molly could have screamed. She only hoped they wouldn’t turn up when Cath visited.
The next morning Frank and Molly had a lie-in. She was wakened by a rat-a-tat-tat on the front door. She forced her eyelids open and glanced at Frank who was not moving. She swung her legs over the side of the bed, shivering as her feet touched the cold linoleum, and hurried downstairs.
Molly flung open the door and her heart turned over. Nathan stood on her front step with Jessica in his arms. For a moment she just stared, thinking, I know I’m not dreaming but what’s he doing here?
‘Did I get you up, Moll?’ His grey eyes were dark with worry. ‘I wouldn’t have disturbed you only I couldn’t get an answer at Doris’s mother’s and Jimmy had told me you’d moved here.’
‘It doesn’t matter.’ Molly gazed hungrily at her daughter and held out her arms.
‘It’s my mother.’ Nathan prised Jessica’s fingers from his hair, wincing as he did so, and handed her over to Molly.
‘What about her?’ The child whimpered. Molly hushed her, pressing her to her bosom, staring at him.
‘She’s gone crazy. Could you look after Jessica until I get back?’
Her daughter forced her head up, staring at Molly with a mixture of curiosity and bewilderment. She looked down at her and noticed two bloodied scratches on the girl’s cheek. ‘How did she hurt herself? What happened?’
He clenched his fist against the door jamb and his eyes were angry. ‘Since Doris left we haven’t been able to keep a girl. Flo quit yesterday – and Cook. Mother’s really off her head.’
‘You mean, she did this?’ Molly touched her daughter’s cheek in horror. ‘How could she? Jessica’s still only a baby!’
‘She went on and on about us getting rid of Jess, saying she didn’t belong to us. Talked about that cousin and Mabel and two babies. I wish I could get to the bottom of that. It’s wicked, isn’t it?’
‘Mabel was my mother’s name!’
‘There you are then! She’s still harping back to the old days when she knew your mother. It’s as if she’s living it again.’
‘So what are you going to do?’
‘The doctor’s coming when he’s finished his surgery. I’ve locked her in her room for now. That’s why I’m in a rush. I’ve got to look in at the factory and be back within two hours. Will Jess be all right with you ’til later?’
‘Of course! You go.’ She touched his shoulder and for a second he covered her hand with his before leaving them.
Jessica wailed, wriggling strenuously in Molly’s hold and crying, ‘Dadda, Dadda!’
Molly shushed her as she carried her indoors, wondering what to say to Frank. Jessica continued to bellow until she caught sight of the cat. Then the girl held out her hand, making a ‘pusss-sss’ sound.
Molly put her down. For a moment Jessica stood there, swaying, clinging to Molly’s skirts. Then suddenly she let go and toddled unsteadily over to the cat. Her legs buckled and she sank on to her bottom, seizing a handful of fur. The cat spat at her and feigned a blow with a front paw. The child blew a raspberry in its face. Molly chuckled, feeling intense joy. Jessica looked up at her, eyes gleaming. She hit the cat’s head with her fist and the cat hissed and aimed another blow.
‘She’ll scratch you,’ warned Molly, scooping up her daughter who screamed, hitting out at her. Molly caught her hand. ‘No! Naughty to smack.’ She kissed the scratch on her daughter’s face. ‘Kiss it better.’ Jessica touched the spot and held her cheek out to Molly, who kissed the scratch again. Then she carried her upstairs, slightly nervous, wondering what Frank would say, but prepared to lie through her eye teeth if necessary.
Bleary eyed, he stared at them both from an unshaven face framed by the bedcovers. ‘Is it that that’s making all the racket?’ Jessica pointed a finger at him. ‘Man.’
‘Yes, funny man. Grouchy man. This is Jessica.’ Molly smiled at her husband, feeling extremely uncomfortable, but proud of her daughter for being able to talk and walk at such an early age. ‘Remember the little girl I used to take care of? Her grandmother’s been taken ill and Mr Collins has asked me to look after her. You don’t mind, do you? It’s only for a few hours.’
His dark brows puckered. ‘What happened to the nursemaid who took over from you?’
‘That was Doris. Now all the other servants have quit, too. His mother’s gone peculiar.’ She placed her daughter on the bed and Jessica and Frank stared at each other. ‘Doesn’t it hurt you, Moll?’ he said. ‘What?’
‘That she’s here and our daughter’s dead.’
‘Of course!’ She looked away. ‘But having another baby makes it much easier.’ Her eyes were on Jessica crawling up the bed towards Frank. She pressed a hand against his nose. ‘Beep,’ she said.
‘Beep,’ he repeated.
She did it again. ‘Beep, beep,’ said Frank.
Molly’s eyes filled with tears. Jessica giggled and she would have repeated the action but Frank stopped her and told Molly to get her off the bed. ‘I’ve just remembered, I was going down the docks. I’ve to get a ship. Money’s running low.’
‘We’ve visitors coming too, don’t forget.’
He groaned, scrubbing his unshaven chin with his hand. ‘I must have been drunk. I could be gone tomorrow. You’d best get Doris to look after the kid. You’re going to have enough on your plate.’
‘Doris is out. But I’ll try and catch her later.’ The last thing Molly wanted was to get rid of her daughter. Somehow she would manage. Although she did not kid herself it was going to be easy, having a toddler playing around her feet.
Molly was on edge as she made preparations for her guests, imagining what would happen if Nathan and Frank were to arrive back together. What would they say to each other? What would they make of each other? The two men in line to be her son’s father. The knocker went and she rushed to open the door, praying it would be Nathan.
‘You are expecting us?’ said Charlie anxiously. He had receding hair, was stocky but strongly built, and dressed in a reasonably decent overcoat.
‘Of course. Come in.’ She managed a smile. ‘Frank’s not back yet but he shouldn’t be long.’
‘You mean he’s not here?’ said Bernie, with obvious disappointment.
Molly explained and was about to close the door when it was pushed from the other side. ‘It’s me,’ said Doris. ‘Mrs Black said a man was knocking at our door then went to yours.’
Molly explained about Nathan and Jessica in a whisper as they trooped into the kitchen.
‘What a lovely little girl! Lovely hair. Yours, is she?’ said Bernie, addressing Doris.
‘Chance would be a fine thing. Who’d have me? She’s our old boss’s daughter, isn’t she, Moll?’ said Doris in a bland voice.
‘You used to work together?’ said Bernie, looking surprised.
‘Yeah! But no longer.’The last thing Molly wanted was Bernie knowing as much about her business as Jimmy and Cath. ‘Doris, you could take her for a bit. I’ll see you later.’
‘There’s no hurry,’ said Doris cheerfully, glancing at Charlie. ‘Gosh, that scouse smells good, wouldn’t you say?’
‘Great.’
‘And who are you? Yer’
ve got a smashing colour. Where d’yer go to find the sun?’
In no time at all the pair of them were chatting away about India, much to Molly’s annoyance. She had no choice but to try and relax and be nice to Bernie, but her ears were straining for the sound of the knocker all the time.
Frank arrived next. ‘You’re late. They’re already here,’ she hissed. ‘I’m going to have to stretch the dinner.’
‘Can’t help that.’ He paused in the doorway at the sight of Jessica lying on the rug, asleep, clutching a rag doll. ‘Is that kid still here? I thought you’d got—’ He noticed Doris. ‘Oh, you’re here, too. Father not arrived then? I hope you haven’t got her for the whole day, Moll.’
She ignored that remark, as she did her own guilt, and gently lifting her daughter, carried her upstairs. She placed her on their bed, kissing her before tiptoeing out.
As she dished up the meal, Frank said, ‘I’ve signed up with the White Star Line, luv. I’ve got to report back at midnight tonight. Sorry, but that’s the way it is.’
‘We’d better not stay long then,’ put in Charlie.
‘Why?’ asked Bernie.
He rolled his eyes and Frank grinned. ‘There’s no need to rush off yet, mate. You can eat your dinner first.’
As they ate the talk was of money and jobs. Charlie saw some difficulty, and so did Doris, in getting more work. ‘The trouble is, I’m only small, see. At the moment I’m just helping me mam in the house,’ she said.
‘Then you’ll make some man a good wife,’ said Charlie. ‘A woman’s place is in the home. Isn’t that right, Frank?’
‘I’ve told Moll I don’t want her going out working again. It’s my job to look after her and the baby.’
‘What baby?’ said Bernie, dropping her fork.
‘The one Moll’s having.’ Frank smiled at his wife across the table. ‘It’s going to be a boy, isn’t it, luv?’
She nodded, wishing she could have kept that secret a bit longer. She bet Ma would know before she went to bed that night.
‘Lucky you,’ said Bernie enviously. ‘I’m going to have to find a job. A nice shop job, I thought.’
She and Doris began to discuss what kind of shop and conversation became more general. Molly was silent, listening for that rat-a-tat-tat on the knocker which would announce the arrival of Nathan. But he still had not returned when the others left. Jessica woke up and the next person to arrive was Cath. ‘Howdo?’ she said cheerfully.
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