by Stahl, Shey
I don’t think you could have wiped that grin off his face.
For someone who didn’t want kids, he sure seemed happy that his boys had arrived safely.
Alley and I jumped to our feet at the chance to see the twins. Nancy stayed at the house with Jimi to watch the Lucifer twins, Lane, Axel and Lexi so we could assist Aiden with Emma.
Emma was in a bit of a frenzy once the doctors told her there was no time for pain medication. Can’t say I blame her on that one.
“What are their names?” I asked when I peered down at the one in my arms. Alley was holding the other.
Emma and Aiden exchanged a loaded glance, as did Jameson.
“What?” I looked back and forth between the three of them. Spencer and Alley were too caught up in staring at the other baby.
Jameson, who had been standing against the door just watching me smiled and made his way over to pull me against his chest gently.
“The one you’re holding...is Charles James.” He whispered softly kissing the side of my head.
I burst into tears. Another moment in my life when I was crying and not in a normal way, snot, tears, heaving, slobber...had it all.
Jameson even had to take baby Charlie from me.
“Shhh...shhh...it’s okay, honey.” He soothed against me.
“I know...it’s just that—” I gave up trying to answer and cried into his hooded sweatshirt.
Once I finally calmed down—took me a good twenty minutes—but once I did, I was able to hold Charlie again and learned that the baby Alley wouldn’t let go of was named Noah David.
Two new little Gomez babies arrived on Thanksgiving.
Giving birth seems intense and maybe even magical but the act itself is disgusting to me. Even though it’s disgusting it still holds something incredible which is new life.
11. Adding Spoiler – Sway
Adding Spoiler – This is a term used to describe the changing of the direction of a spoiler or wing on a race car. Usually adjusting the angle of the spoiler creates down force and gives the car more grip on the track.
It wasn’t long after the birth of Emma and Aiden’s boys and we found ourselves heading to New York for the championship banquet.
Watching my husband give his second championship speech was probably right up there with the day our son was born. I was so proud of him. He worked so hard for everything. He deserved this.
I sat there in my cream stupidest-idea-ever-with-a-baby-in-your-lap evening gown with Axel, elated. He was wearing a tiny tuxedo that resembled Jameson’s and I don’t think I had stopped smiling since I put it on him.
He was adorable.
My smile widened when they announced my husband. My eyes locked with Jameson standing in the shadows of the stage; his head bent forward displaying the nervous energy he fought so hard to disguise.
“What this young man has done in the last two years most spend their entire careers trying to accomplish and this twenty-four year old kid has done it with poise and reverence. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your Nextel Cup Series Champion, Driver of the Ford number nine Simplex Shocks and Springs, Jameson Riley!”
When Axel heard his daddy’s voice, his head shot toward the stage.
Jameson made his way to the podium and stopped. His head remained bent forward staring at his hands before he smiled and slowly met the gaze of the audience as they cheered.
He then laughed and shook his head as the cheering continued longer than it had last year. In the background, they played a video montage of his season highlighting each win and then a few of the disappointing finishes he’d had. I watched closely as Jameson turned and watched the video until the screen stayed on the image of him holding the championship trophy beside his dad in Homestead.
With a smirk, he faced the podium again. He nodded again and took a deep breath, a nervous energy radiated from him.
“There are so many people I need to thank this year and I know I can’t think of all of them so if I forget you, I’m truly sorry.” He smiled and looked over at Axel and me sitting on the side of the stage and winked.
He went on to thank his crew, sponsors, family, and a handful of drivers. I knew I was crying when he started thanking his family and naming each one and the strength they brought to the team. I could feel the tears tickling my cheeks as they ran down my face. Axel, who was still seated on my lap, looked up at me when he sensed my hysteria. I thought maybe I should control myself but all I could do was sit and watch my best friend, my husband and the father of my son, thanking everyone he thought deserved this title more than him.
Kyle looked at me with wide eyes at one point. I waved him off and continued my girly-emotional-breakdown.
As I couldn’t stop crying, Axel had wiggled loose and all but ran over to Jameson. My dress wasn’t exactly the dress to wear if you needed to chase a kid around but before I could make a fool of myself, Jameson waved me off.
When Axel reached him the crowd awwd in response.
Jameson bent down and picked him up. “This is my son, Axel.”
Everyone, including me, awwd again at the look they exchanged with each other and Axel gave him that big cheesy grin he was so good at.
“This little man and that absolutely beautiful woman sitting right there,” he pointed at me, keeping his eyes locked with mine, “are my inspiration. They never let me down and late at night when everything else fades away, they are there for me...no matter what.” He winked at me again. “I never thought I’d win another championship this soon. Hell, I never thought I’d win the first one but everyone I thanked...they deserve this just as much as I do, if not more.”
The proud Mama Wizard I was lost it completely and cried against Jimi’s shoulder.
Adding Spoiler – Jameson
After the championship banquet we planned a birthday celebration for our little spaz. It seemed, though it seemed this way every year, no matter what I did to slow the off season, time flew by.
Emma really did out do herself on it once again. It looked like a winter wonderland, complete with an ice-skating ring, which I found dumb seeing as he was one and could barely walk let alone skate.
What really annoyed me was the white fake snow everywhere. Somehow, the shit kept ending up in my mouth somehow.
How did someone put up with all those flakes?
It got everywhere and it was impossible to get rid of. It was so grainy and obtrusive and no matter how much I tried to brush the shit off, it stuck to my skin and clothes like tar. How was I supposed to enjoy myself when miniature microbes were attacking me?
Van approached me as I tried to put together Axel’s go-kart Justin and I built for him.
“It looks like a goddamn snow globe exploded in here.” Van huffed brushing the white flakes from his JAR Racing sweatshirt.
“It’s annoying.” I agreed brushing more away.
“Have you seen Lucas?” he asked handing me a wrench I needed but couldn’t reach.
“No...why?”
“He ate a quarter.”
“Kids eat quarters all the time.” Spencer said when he walked up. “I wouldn’t worry about it. Now...if he shits two dimes and a nickel...then you should worry.”
The guys stood joking around with me as I finished putting together the kart.
Over the last year, Van was like part of the family. He still served as our bodyguard but most of the time he was hanging out with us like he was our brother and it suited all of us just fine.
Looking around, I searched for my wife to let her know I had finished up with the kart. Sway was busy with the kids since we had a shit load here. Just a year ago, it was only Lane and the Lucifer twins around. Now we had Axel who turned one a week ago; Alexis, who was just shy of five months and then Aiden and Emma’s twins, Noah and Charlie who were a little over four weeks old.
I repeat—we had a shit load of kids.
Lane jumped on my back before I could make it over to Sway who was chasing Axel across the yard.
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“Uncle Jameson!”
“Hey buddy!” I reached around and pulled him into a headlock, his legs dangled around me as he fought to get loose. Alley approached us carrying Lexi in her arms.
“You guys all packed?” she asked looking between Aiden and me.
“Where are we going?”
“Tulsa...I’ve been telling you this for three goddamn weeks.” Alley said handing Lexi to Spencer. “The Chili Bowl, remember?”
“I wasn’t listening.” I told her while Sway chased after Axel who was heading toward the cars once again.
“Neither was I.” Aiden added when he found out he was supposed to come with me.
“When do we leave?” we both asked.
“Tomorrow morning at eight,”
Damn it.
Justin, Tyler, Tate, Bobby and me all planned to go to the Chili Bowl this year but I hated leaving so soon after I just arrived home. Mostly because I knew that after the Chili Bowl, I started testing in Rockingham and then Daytona.
Being a champion was great, but again, it was wearing on my sanity at times.
Later in the day, the boys and I challenged each other at a game of hockey on the ice-skating ring Emma had put in our backyard. Sway felt the need to remind me of my contract with Simplex.
“Don’t do anything stupid!” her eyes did that judging once over.
“I wasn’t planning on it.” I yelled over my shoulder and pointed toward my make shift pads of toilet paper rolls and maxi pads.
Sway looked down at Axel.
“He never plans on it.” She told him and he nodded.
We stood there as Gentry, Kyle’s brother, explained the rules to us since he used to play in high school. None of us paid a goddamn bit of attention to him. We just intended on fucking each other up anyway.
The game, which wasn’t a game at all, was on delay soon after it started so Van could help Ethan and his broken arm off the ice.
“I’m freezing here!” Spencer grumbled, rubbing his hands together.
“Here’s some matches,” I told him and tossed the matches in his direction. “set yourself on fire.”
Eventually the ass beating continued until Tyler knocked Spencer’s front tooth out with a slap shot. Alley was not pleased but Lane thought it was pretty awesome.
In the end, Dad broke up the game mumbling something about this being a horrible idea and if I got hurt, Simplex would have a shit-fit.
“Is that all you do is bitch?” I glared at him tearing away the remaining toilet paper rolls from my shins.
“I bitch because look who my children are.” He countered with the same glare.
He had me there.
Sway managed to get everyone gathered up to sing happy birthday to Axel. I’d never paid much attention at a kid’s birthday party but watching my son sitting in his go-kart the way I did when I was his age was something I would never forget. His toothless smile said it all as he jerked the steering wheel back and forth.
I stood there beside Sway watching our son enjoy his birthday present.
She sighed softly leaning her head against my chest.
“Thank you,” she whispered looking up at me with her adoring green eyes.
“No honey, thank you.” I dipped my head down to kiss her forehead.
It was hard to imagine life getting much better than this but I also knew my time here with my family was about to end. But for now, for tonight, we were a family once again.
Adding Spoiler – Sway
Watching Axel blow out his birthday candles I remembered my theory on wishing and that you got one wish a year and realized that this wasn’t what I would have dreamed about a few years ago but it was so much more than I ever expected. It was more.
After Axel was sound asleep in his bed and our home was free from our family, I made my way into our room where Jameson was packing for the Chili Bowl. One look and he was no longer packing but tending to his Mama Wizard.
Two hours later, I was standing in our bedroom getting ready for bed after our shower when I glanced down at the picture on my dresser. It was one of Jameson and Axel right after his birth, the look on Axel’s face was contentment, as though he knew his daddy’s hands would never falter.
Distracted by remembering the moment he was born, I dropped my pill, yes, the pill.
Oh shit!
I reached down on the floor to grab it but unfortunately, it wasn’t there.
“Oh goddamn you Mr. Jangles!” I pushed him away. “You suck!”
12. Pit Stand – Sway
Pit Stand – Sometimes referred to as the “war wagon”. This stand, on the inside of the wall adjacent to the pit stall, is where key team personnel, most notably the crew chief, car chief and often the team owner, sit during the race and communicate strategy. It is outfitted with satellite television screens, timing and scoring information, radio controls and other communication relevant to race operations.
I bit my nails nervously while Alley and I sat there on my toilet. Well, I sat on the toilet; she sat on the edge of our tile tub, biting her own nails.
Last night Mr. Jangles ate my birth control pill. This wouldn’t have been so bad except this was the fourth pill in my cycle he’d eaten this month. When I took a closer look at the dates on the box, I should have started my period by now. I was now a week late, which would have led to only one weekend I could have possibly gotten pregnant, the weekend Jameson flew home before the last race of the season. That was the night we spent the majority of our time in bed.
“This can’t be happening.” I muttered incoherently to myself.
Even though I was talking to myself, Alley replied. “You? How the hell am I going to keep track of your shithead of a husband with three kids? Did you know that in Phoenix I had to separate him and Colin three times in the matter of an hour after the first practice session?”
“You’re the one that got knocked up.” I replied defensively. “That’s hardly my fault or Jameson’s.”
“I didn’t say it was your fault.” She sighed and slumped down holding the pregnancy test in her hand. “I blame these Riley men.”
“I agree.” I finished peeing on the stick and then sat next to her. “Axel just turned one. How the hell am I going to manage another one?”
“You better not turn pink you asshole stick!” Alley shouted at the innocent pregnancy test. Then she started crying in a very melodramatic way. “Why does this keep happening to me?”
“I think I remember this conversation we had, or at least I think I do.” I turned toward her. “I asked what the best birth control was...and you said: No sex.”
She held up the now two pink line sticks in my face. “You clearly didn’t listen to me.”
“Neither did you, hypocrite.” I held her positive stick up in her face.
We stared at each other for a moment, started crying, and then resorted to laying in my bed all morning after Emma came by and watched reality TV until Nancy arrived with the kids.
Nancy had been watching them so we could take the boys to the Lake Norman Air Park to meet Wes so that they could leave for Tulsa and the Chili Bowl.
On the way back to our house in Mooresville, I told her I thought I might be pregnant.
Alley, the hard ass bitch that she could be broke and started bawling because she was three weeks late herself and hadn’t told anyone. So we stopped off at Wal-Mart on Norman Station Blvd, picked up a few pregnancy tests and a box of donuts.
Nancy let herself in and came upstairs to my room with all the kids. I’m not sure how she could handle them all but she had Lane carrying Noah, who looked like he was carrying a bomb that was about to explode.
Axel was on her shoulders with a very large grin and a chocolate donut in his chubby little hands. Most of the chocolate had been licked from the donut and was either on his face or in Nancy’s hair. In her arms she had Lexi, who was sound asleep, while pushing Charlie in the stroller.
I wondered for a moment why she didn’t have
Noah in the stroller as well but it appeared she had too many bags in there to actually fit kids in it.
Axel started squirming when he spotted me in the bed.
“Mama Mama!” he practically flung himself off Nancy’s shoulders to get to me.
She had to set Lexi down before this could happen, which irritated Axel. As I’ve said before, when he wants something, he wants it right now.
Pushing myself up from the bed, I went to him in fear for Nancy’s hair that he was pulling on to get down.
“Calm down buddy. Mommy’s right here.”
He smiled wide. “Mama,”
There’s nothing better than a hug, but a hug given by a child is by far the greatest feeling. They give everything to you unconditionally because that’s what they feel. Somewhere along the lines we lose that in life; the ability to do as we feel rather than what we think.
Not my baby, he loved me.
“Did you have a good time with Me-Ma?” I sat down on the edge of the bed with him.
That’s when Nancy, just as Emma does after she goes shopping, showed us everything she bought for the kids.
Axel nodded with a chocolate smile and curled up on my lap to eat the rest of his donut.
Emma reached over to take Noah from Lane when he found the donuts we had on the bed. Lane had a habit of forgetting that he was holding something when chocolate or sugar of any kind was involved.
“It appears you’ve already had a donut Lane.” Alley deduced after seeing his chocolate smile.
Lane shrugged carelessly and continued the selection process. Once he had his specific donut selected, he crawled up next to his sleeping sister on the bed and patted her head.
“Mommy,” Lane began. “I was thinking today...” he paused, took a large bite from his donut and looked up at Alley as she looked over at him pulling her long hair into a bun. “I wanna get a taboo like daddy has.”