by Jade Winters
‘In an ideal world, they would, but we run a business, not a charity.’ Vanessa knew it was a cop out, even as she said it. ‘So, tell me, what’s your interest in the centre?’
Visibly flustered, Kelli ran her fingers through her hair but said nothing.
‘Are you going to tell me?’
Kelli refused to answer or look Vanessa in the eye. Shifting uncomfortably, her eyes combed the floor.
‘I asked you a question.’ Vanessa wasn’t relenting. ‘I know what kind of services they offer there. Are you gay? You can tell me.’
Kelli’s eyes widened to Vanessa’s candid prying; her bottom lip trembled before she gripped it between her teeth.
‘Yes, I’m gay! Are you happy now? Your niece is a dyke just like you! Now you can get your Public Relations team to put it out in a media statement so that the whole world can know!’
Vanessa ignored her outburst. ‘Is this what’s been troubling you all this time? Because if it is, you can talk to me you know,’ she said casually, although her heart was thundering in her chest, praying Kelli would open up to her.
Slowly, Kelli raised her eyes. ‘Yes.’
Breakthrough! Vanessa was so overwhelmed, that she could have thrust her fist in the air in triumph. She tried not to look pleased, knowing Kelli would construe it as ridicule or smugness.
Vanessa walked up to Kelli and placed her hands on her shoulders. ‘I’m glad that you feel comfortable enough to share this with me. I can only imagine how hard it’s been for you recently. Not just about your sexuality, but everything.’
Kelli studied her face. Vanessa wanted to pull her into her arms and hug the life out of her. Kelli was coming back to her.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ Vanessa asked as she dropped her arms to her side and stepped back to give Kelli some space.
Kelli shrugged. ‘I thought you wouldn’t believe me. That I was having an identity crisis.’
‘Jesus, Kelli, is that what you really thought? That I wouldn’t believe the person I love more than anything on this earth?’
Kelli sneered at her. ‘If that’s true then why are you trying to close down the only place I went to for help when there was no one else?’
‘Listen—’
‘No, you listen!’ Tears brimmed in her eyes. ‘All you care about is money! Work and money! That’s all that matters to you, so don’t pretend you care about me. It’s fucking sick what you’re doing to all those people who need the centre. You’re worse than Craig; at least he doesn’t pretend to care. I fucking hate you!’
Kelli made for the door whilst sobbing and Vanessa’s heart caved in under the sledgehammer of her attack.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
After a long day at the centre, Heidi arrived home, wanting nothing more than to soak in a hot bath and to have an early night. She didn’t even want dinner; she was that tired. The street lamps had blown again, pitching the pathway to her block of flats into darkness. Heidi pulled her phone out of her coat pocket and held her finger ready to speed dial the police should someone lunge out at her from the tall brushes up ahead. Under the full moon, she scanned the area to discern any kind of motion in the communal garden. Visions of Jack the Ripper played on her mind, no matter how much she tried to convince herself that he had died decades ago.
Heidi safely reached the entrance to her flats and looked up the stairwell when she heard footsteps coming down. Instead of walking up, she waited until the person came into view.
‘Vanessa?’ she said.
Vanessa gave a slight wave.
‘Look, if you’ve come about—’
‘I’m not here about the centre, I need to ….’ Her words vanished as they caught in her throat. ‘I didn’t know where else—’
‘Hey, it’s okay. Come on, let’s go up to my flat. I’ll put the kettle on and make you a coffee,’ Heidi said, getting a strong whiff of brandy from Vanessa’s breath.
‘I think I need one.’
From the way Vanessa’s body stooped, it was obvious something heavy was on her mind. What, Heidi couldn’t imagine.
They made their way up the two flights of stairs in silence. Once inside Heidi’s flat, Vanessa wandered around aimlessly, looking at the wall art while Heidi made two cups of coffee.
‘Let’s sit outside while it’s still mild,’ Heidi said.
Vanessa gestured for Heidi to lead the way. Simone had gifted her outdoor lights for the balcony a few weeks ago, which Heidi had skilfully attached along the edge of the wall.
‘Wow, it looks lovely out here,’ Vanessa said as she dropped onto a chair.
‘This is my own little piece of heaven,’ Heidi said, lighting three candles on the small wooden table.
Vanessa slid off her jacket and hung it on the back of her chair.
‘So, what’s the matter?’ Heidi asked when she finally sat down.
‘Where do you want me to start?’ Vanessa cast her a look with her enthralling eyes that left Heidi weak.
‘At the beginning normally helps.’
Vanessa bowed her head and ran her hands through her hair. ‘I’m a failure.’
‘Who? You? Are you kidding me?’
Vanessa let out a long sigh. ‘It’s true. With the things that matter anyway.’
‘Like what? You’re beautiful, intelligent and you drive the most amazing car—’
‘Yes, but it’s all materialistic. I’d give it all up to ….’
‘To?’ Heidi pressed, anxious to know what was more important than never having to worry about what the future held.
‘To connect with my niece.’
‘Your niece?’ Heidi was not expecting to hear that. ‘I’m sorry, but I’m confused. Why are you having problems with her?’
‘She’s under my care—’
‘Really?’
‘Until she’s eighteen anyway.’
‘Where’re her parents?’
‘My … my sister … died.’
Heidi’s hand flew to her mouth. ‘Oh God, I’m sorry, Vanessa.’
Vanessa waved her apology away. ‘I feel as if I’m letting her slip through my fingers. No matter what I do, or how I approach her, she just locks me out,’ she explained; her breath-taking grey eyes looked pristine in the faint glare of the romantic candle light.
‘How old is she?’
‘Sixteen.’
‘Tough age. Do you mind me asking when her mother died?’ Heidi caught herself. She didn’t want to make things even more emotional for Vanessa. ‘Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.’
‘It’s okay. I’m here because I need to talk to someone. My sister committed suicide.’ Her voice broke and tears ran freely down her cheeks. ‘Craig bullied her when she was alive. He hated her because he thought she was a failure for falling pregnant at eighteen. He really thinks he’s so bloody perfect.’
Heidi nodded, not about to break Vanessa’s train of thought.
‘I feel like I’m not doing enough to get her out of her shell, to show her how much I care. I was so wrapped up in my own life, travelling the world and having fun while Lauren was teetering on the edge of a chair with a fucking noose around her neck.’
Heidi’s chest ached, empathetic to her bare sorrow. She placed her hand over Vanessa’s.
‘And now I’m abandoning Kelli by throwing myself into my work instead. Some aunt, eh?’ Vanessa held her gaze for a moment. ‘No wonder Kelli’s been going to your centre—’
‘Wait, Kelli’s your niece? Of course,’ Heidi said as she remembered the very attractive girl who had been hanging out with Christina recently. I thought she looked familiar. It all made sense where those anonymous files had come from—not that she’d say a word about it to Vanessa.
‘Yes,’ Vanessa said, looking up at her. ‘Do you know her? Have you spoken to her?’
‘A few times. She seems to be a well-adjusted young woman. A little reserved, but most teenagers are,’ Heidi replied.
‘She told me she’s gay and that she thought
I wouldn’t believe her.’
‘Why would she think that?’
Vanessa gave Heidi a cursory glance. ‘I have no idea. I’ve been racking my brain to think of an incident that would make her think that, but I just keep coming up blank.’
‘Well the fact she told you should tell you something,’ Heidi said. ‘That must have been a big step for her. It shows she trusts you despite everything else that’s going on around you.’
The air between them took on the feeling of a force field, and for a moment, Heidi could do nothing but lose herself in Vanessa’s eyes. Her stomach churned when Vanessa reached behind her chair for her jacket and slipped it on.
‘I’d better go. I don’t even know why I came here.’ Vanessa pushed herself onto her feet. ‘You’ve got enough on your plate without me going on about my own problems.’
Heidi stood toe-to-toe with Vanessa. It took every ounce of control not to pull her into her arms. ‘I think you should stay the night,’ she said, hoping it didn’t sound like an opportunistic pick-up line.
Vanessa arched an eyebrow. ‘You think so?’
‘I do.’
‘Where will I sleep?’
‘In my bed.’
‘With you?’ A smile crept onto her lips.
‘Unless you want to sleep on the sofa.’
Vanessa’s gaze moved from Heidi’s face to her chest; the heat in her eyes told Heidi all she needed to know. The voice that had been telling her to stop things before they went any further held less sway than it had before. Yes, shit was going to hit the fan in the morning, but if Vanessa knew what was going to be unleashed, she wouldn’t stay a second longer and Heidi didn’t want that. She had let Vanessa go before and she wasn’t going to do it again, not tonight anyway. They had made a connection and the night was theirs.
Nothing, not the centre, business or Craig was going to stand between them now.
Vanessa shrugged out of her jacket in what Heidi thought was the sexiest move she’d ever seen before. As her jacket fell to the floor, Vanessa peeled off her top, shaking her hair loose out of its ponytail. Heidi strangled a moan, knowing what was coming.
Vanessa eliminated what little space there was between them and kissed her hard. Heidi kissed back; her hands found their way to Vanessa’s backside and pulled her close as she wedged her leg between Vanessa’s thighs. Vanessa let out a soft sigh as she rubbed against Heidi’s leg muscle.
Vanessa wrenched her mouth from Heidi’s; struggling for breath she said, ‘Inside.’
Heidi didn’t have to be told twice. They stumbled into the living room and Vanessa guided Heidi onto the sofa before quickly removing Heidi’s jeans and underwear. Vanessa fell to her knees in front of her and Heidi cradled her head, gripping her hair in her fists.
Vanessa’s voice was tight with lust when she said, ‘I want to taste you.’
Smoothly parting Heidi’s legs, Vanessa slid her hands beneath Heidi’s behind forcing her hips upwards, before lowering her mouth until she made contact with the silky centre of Heidi’s core.
‘Mmm.’ A guttural sigh escaped Heidi’s lips as she writhed when the tip of Vanessa’s tongue made contact.
Vanessa’s free hands cupped Heidi’s naked breasts, alternating between squeezing and tugging her hard nipples.
Heidi had been touched before, but never like this. Her body was on fire as she opened her eyes and looked down at Vanessa’s head between her legs. That in itself was enough to make her come there and then. Vanessa’s tongue was a master of control, driving Heidi to the edge as it teased and licked in long sensuous strokes until Heidi thought she was going to explode. As if sensing the end was near for her, Vanessa said, ‘Not yet.’
‘I have to ….’ She pushed Vanessa’s mouth harder against her.
Vanessa pulled back. ‘If you suffocate me, I won’t be able to finish.’
‘It’s okay,’ Heidi whimpered in frustration before forcing her head down again. ‘I know CPR.’
Vanessa gave a muffled laugh. She grabbed Heidi behind her neck and brought her mouth to her own. Heidi shuddered as Vanessa’s fingers slid between her thighs until she found her swollen nub and then rubbed her wet thumb around it.
‘Oh shit,’ Heidi said against Vanessa’s open mouth as Vanessa’s fingers slowly slid deep inside.
‘Do you like that?’ Vanessa said in a coarse seductive whisper.
‘Fuck, yes … yes,’ Heidi panted, bucking and writhing as Vanessa rhythmically thrust into her again and again, picking up speed. Heidi’s inner walls tightened around Vanessa’s fingers and she cried out, arching her back as each awakened nerve ending quivered. Teetering on the edge of the most powerful orgasm Heidi had ever thought possible, she let out one last cry and finally let go.
Vanessa kept her fingers inside Heidi as her orgasm washed over her. Vanessa’s tongue circled Heidi’s nipple, her hot mouth then engulfed it. Heidi wanted this moment to last forever. Vanessa was hers for now, and she belonged to Vanessa, even if it was only going to be for one night.
Hours later, they lay on Heidi’s bed—naked, spent. Heidi closed her eyes as Vanessa’s hand caressed her hair and her warm breath tickled the hairs on the back of her neck. Under beams of moonlight, Heidi lay perfectly still and listened to the heart-wrenching sound of Vanessa crying until some time later, she finally fell asleep.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The tweeting birds stirred Heidi from her sex-filled dream and it took several seconds for her to realise that last night wasn’t a dream after all, that the hot sex had actually happened. She only had to look at the hand covering her breast and feel the warmth from Vanessa’s breath on her neck to realise it was a reality. Heidi wanted to laugh, jump out of bed and dance, but refrained to keep from waking Vanessa up. Instead, Heidi carefully slipped Vanessa’s hand off her breast and slid out from under her. She was dying to use the toilet, so she made quick work of her reluctant escape.
‘Where are you going?’ Vanessa asked as Heidi headed toward the bedroom door on tip-toes.
‘Sorry,’ she whispered and turned. ‘I didn’t mean to wake you up.’
‘I wasn’t sleeping.’ Vanessa smiled mischievously.
Heidi gasped in mock exasperation, placing her hands over her breasts. Vanessa threw her head back and laughed.
Oh my God, you even look beautiful first thing in the morning.
‘Can I take you out for breakfast?’ Vanessa asked.
‘Hmm, sounds like a plan,’ Heidi replied as she sat on the edge of the bed.
Vanessa glanced at the clock on the bedside table. ‘It’s only seven o’clock, not many places will be open. How about I make breakfast at my place,’ she offered. ‘What do you say?’
Heidi answered in a heartbeat. ‘I say yay!’
‘Do you mind if I take a quick shower?’
‘Nope, feel free. You can even wear my dressing gown if you like.’
Vanessa eyed her gown on the back of the door. ‘Would you be offended if I pass on this occasion? Pink’s not really my colour. I’m more of a yellow sort of lady.’
‘Okay, I’ll let it go this once. Let me just use the toilet first,’ Heidi said before walking to the bathroom.
Heidi returned to the bedroom minutes later and directed Vanessa to the shower. As she sat back on her bed she couldn’t take the smile off her face. That was until her phone beeped and she read the message.
Everything is set to go.
Long live the centre lol
Dread tore into Heidi’s heart as she realised that, in less than two hours, all of Berkley O’Neil’s dirty little secrets would become public knowledge, and the woman she could hear singing happily in the bathroom would be caught right in the middle of it. It was too late to stop Simone now; hadn’t she told her that it was the right thing to do?
Rather than working her mind into a frenzy, Heidi busied herself washing the few dishes cluttering up the small kitchen. By the time she’d packed away the last plate, Vanessa joined her.
‘Penny for your thoughts?’ Vanessa said, fiddling with the button on her shirt.
Heidi tossed aside the dishcloth. It was the moment of truth. ‘Vanessa, we need to talk.’
Her words were met with a kiss. ‘I don’t want anything to spoil our day today. Look, I’ve even turned my phone off. I haven’t done that since I first bought one.’
Heidi slipped her arms around Vanessa’s waist. ‘In that case, I’m one lucky lady.’
‘No, I’m the lucky one. You are so beautiful,’ Vanessa said in a moment of quiet contact; she stared at her with mesmerising eyes. They were laughing, even though her mouth wasn’t, and her gaze sank deep into Heidi’s soul, confusing her priorities—at least the professional ones.
‘So are you,’ Heidi said and welcomed her lips.
Vanessa’s hands fell on the small of Heidi’s back and she pulled her body against her own.
‘Let’s go back to bed?’ she whispered in Vanessa’s ear as Heidi virtually melted into her embrace.
***
After picking up a few things from the supermarket, and stopping for Nutella crepes and hot chocolate with whipped cream, it was midday before Vanessa and Heidi set off to her house. Vanessa was adamant about cooking her lunch, since they’d eaten breakfast out.
‘Seriously, I wouldn’t mind just having a toasted cheese sandwich, after filling up on the crepe,’ Heidi insisted.
‘I’m sure you wouldn’t, but today you’re my guest, so I’m cooking,’ Vanessa retorted. ‘Don’t worry, I won’t poison you for draining all of my energy. I couldn’t go into work even if I wanted to.’
‘It was worth it, wasn’t it?’ Heidi asked. Before everything blew up in her face, she needed to know that what they had shared meant something to Vanessa.
‘You’re damn right it was.’ Vanessa grinned as she gave Heidi a sideward glance. ‘Hey, what’s with the serious face?’
Heidi took Vanessa’s free hand and held it tight in her own. ‘Nothing. I just want you to remember last night was something special.’