“This is what ye want? What ye like?”
“I have enjoyed it, but it isnae necessarily what I want with ye.”
Alex never mentioned a past with other women before, and Brighde found it difficult to hear. She did not like the idea that other women had shared with Alex what she was just learning about.
“If that’s what ye want, Alex, I am willing to try.” Alex heard the tiny hitches in her voice. He pulled her back, so he could look her in the eye.
“I will never make ye do aught ye dinna want. If this doesnae appeal to ye, then it willnae ever happen.”
“But if it’s what ye enjoy, then I’m willing to try.” She repeated the same refrain.
Alex searched her eyes and saw some curiosity, but there was worry there. He did not think it was about the actual act. There was something else.
“Brie, what arenae ye saying? What are ye holding back?”
“If this is something that ye like, then I would prefer ye do it with me.” She whispered.
“With ye? Who else would I be doing it with? I--” It registered with him what she was really saying. “Brie, there will never be anyone else. Nae just because of ma honor and the pledge that I have made. I told ye as much that night on the wall walk. I dinna want anyone else. I havenae ever kept a mistress because there wasna any woman before ye that I would consider binding maself to in any way. Aye, I have been with other women, but that was the past. It doesnae bare thinking aboot because none of them mattered. It is nae them that I ache for. It isnae a single one of them that I crave like I do ma next breath of air. It isnae a single one of those women that I want to share ma life with. Ye ken I havenae ever brought a woman back to this chamber, but I didna think twice about bringing ye here. I kenned before I could have realized that ye were the only one for me. Brie, whatever we share in our bed and in this chamber is between only the two of us. It has naught to do with anyone else.” He stroked the full length from her temple to the end of her hair as he looked down into her silver-grey eyes.
“That may be, but how can this nae be just the same as it has always been for ye? I’ve never done these things before ye. I ken I’m being peevish, but it smarts to realize that ma husband beds me just like any other woman he’s already been with.” As soon as the words left her mouth, she wished she could swallow them. The look of hurt was almost as severe as the one she caused all those nights ago when she nearly lost what mattered most.
“Is that what ye think? I told ye I havenae ever kept a mistress because there has never been a woman before ye that I cared aboot. I’ve told ye that more than once. Is that all this is to ye? Ye think I'm just tupping ye? Like I would a tavern wench or some whore who's been with a hundred men before me and will probably be with a hundred after me. I thought that I've been making love to ma wife every time we came together. I never took for granted what we shared, but it seems like ye just assumed I was fucking ye. Ye still think I'll go fuck someone else. Ye dinna trust me at all."
Alex struggled to get off the bed. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration before walking across the chamber to look out the window. He might have been an injured man, but he still had more strength as a Highlander than most men ever did.
Never hearing him speak like that before, Brighde watched him for only a moment before following him. She squeezed herself between the side of the window and him.
"Or have ye ever thought that mayhap I worry I amnae good enough for ye, that I maynae be enough? I canna compete with women with more experience than me."
"And ye dinna seem to understand that it's never been a competition. There isnae anyone to beat because there was never anyone else. There were warm bodies that may have pleasured me, but I never looked back once we each got what we wanted. I didna care once it was through. I walked away just as they did. Ye dinna have to try to be better than someone who doesnae exist. Ye are the only woman I have ever loved. Canna ye understand that? Dammit, Brie! If ye willna believe ma words, then I will show ye." He pulled her along with him until he got to the chair in front of the fire.
"Ye want to ken what it means to be fucked, then think back to that morning in the cave when I took ye against the wall." He wrapped her hair around his hand and pulled her head back. "Anyone watching us would have thought I was. But do ye ken what I was thinking that entire time?" He wrapped his arm around her, and she tilted her hips back in invitation. He plunged into her, thankful that she was already wet. "Do ye ken what I'm thinking now?" He thrust again. "The only thing in ma head then, and is in ma mind now, is how ma heart feels like it could burst from how much I love ye. I thought that it wasna possible to get any closer to ye or deeper inside ye than I already was. That I couldnae get enough of the one woman I already gave ma heart to. To the one woman I give it to now and will do over and over again till ma vera last breath. So mayhap I did fuck ye then, and mayhap I am now, but I believed then that I was making love to ye just as I am making love to ye now. I dinna ken how else to show ye how fierce and strong ma feelings are for ye."
Brighde was lost in his words and the sensations of him sliding in and out of her. As much as she liked it when they came together with tenderness and slowness, she craved this harshness, this base need to join together to demonstrate the power of their feelings for one another. She leaned further forward and spread her buttocks with her hands. She pressed back with her hips each time Alex's thrusts pushed her forward.
"I need this too. Harder. Ye will nae break me. Ye have me. Ye have all of me. Every part." She pushed back hard and reached back to find the grooves on his hips that fit her hands so perfectly. She pulled him to her and gripped tightly, digging her fingers in while she looked over her shoulder. The look of concentration and determination reminded her that there would always be a warrior just below the surface. She nodded her head once before she let go of his hips.
The temptation was strong, but he shook his head.
"I'm too close, ye're nae ready, and I canna bear nae looking into yer eyes for another moment."
He pulled out of her and spun her around. He lifted her, and she wrapped her legs around his hips still careful not to touch his injury. She could not believe the strength he possessed. He carried her to the edge of the bed and laid her down. He pulled her legs loose and placed one foot on his shoulder while he held the other close to his good hip. He braced himself on one arm as he pressed into her over and over. Brighde fisted the sheets as her moans came closer and closer together.
"Come for me. I canna last much longer." As if on cue, Alex felt the muscles of her core close in around him, milking him. He seated himself to the hilt and rocked until he felt her spasms calm and his own cock stopped jerking inside her.
Brighde pulled him down to her and pressed a searing kiss to his mouth. It was her turn to mark him as hers. She was awestruck that any man who had been battling a near-death illness only a day ago would do what Alex just did, but she also knew she never should have doubted that warrior in him or the love he felt for her.
They stayed together like that until Alex noticed she was starting to get chilled.
"Brie, climb under the covers," he said as he slowly pulled out. She whimpered at the loss, but the cool night air had her scrambling to pull the sheets over herself. As Alex moved onto the mattress beside her, she looked at his bandages and was relieved to see there was no blood on them.
"Alex, I dinna ken how to explain how I feel, but I ken I will always love ye. I havenae ever experienced aught as strong."
"This is all new to me as well. I dinna have the words to describe it. Sometimes I can only show ye. It hasnae ever been like that before ye. I love ye too."
They fell asleep in one another's arms.
Chapter Twenty-Four
T
hey settled into married life over the next several weeks. Alex made good on his pledge to be wed before a priest and in a kirk. The afternoon following Alex’s return to consciousness, Tavish and Magnus carried Alex down to the kirk.
He was none too pleased to need his younger brothers to carry him anywhere let alone across the bailey but marrying Brighde properly outweighed any embarrassment. Alex healed quickly and was back in the lists before Brighde felt comfortable, but he allowed, and even encouraged, her ministrations when she fussed. They slipped off together and often as they could. When time permitted they went down to the beach alternating between swimming and making love. More often than not they ended up making love while in the water. They tried going to the loch a couple of times but found that Callum and Siùsan always beat them there. They snuck off to the storage buildings or up to their chamber multiple times a day. Never again was any doubt of their feelings for one another ever expressed.
Alex could not have been more in heaven until one morning he awoke to Brighde retching over the chamber pot. He hurried to her side and saw she had already cast up her accounts. He held her hair back until she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.
"There isnae aught left to come up."
Alex handed her a sprig of mint to chew on and wiped her forehead and the back of her neck with a cool cloth. She held the compress against her neck.
Alex watched anxiously for the color to return to her cheeks. When it did not, even after a few moments, he pulled a fresh leine over his head and reached for his plaid.
"I dinna like this. I'm fetching Aileen. Ye need to be seen by the healer."
Brighde caught his wrist as she leaned over the pot to throw up what she could not imagine was still in her.
"I've already seen her. Yesterday."
"And ye didna tell me? How could ye nae tell me ye're ill?"
"Because I amnae exactly ill. I may feel poorly some days over the next few weeks, but it's naught that won't right itself. Da."
She watched as the news washed over him and finally settled. He was struck even more dumbfounded than when she announced all those weeks ago that he was going to be an uncle.
"A bairn. Our own bairn?"
"Ye had to ken it would happen sooner rather than later with the way we've been. We may have tried many other ways to couple, but we've done it the way that makes babes plenty of times."
Alex sunk into the chair and pulled Brighde into his arms.
"Aileen says so?"
"Aye. She actually thinks I'm a tad further along than would fit with when we announced we were wed and said our vows before Father Peter. It would seem our night, or rather morn, in the cave bound us together from then on."
She looked at Alex's face and worried her bottom lip.
"Are ye happy about this?" She asked softly.
"Happy?" He looked at her in awe and placed his hand over her belly protectively. He smiled at her before sharing a tender kiss that conveyed all the depth of love they felt for one another.
"I didna think I’d spilled in ya the third time even though I felt a short wave of pleasure. It certainly explains the tenderness in yer breast and why they've grown. Nae that I am complaining about the latter."
Alex grinned as she swatted him. He caught her hand and pressed it against his heart.
"This beats for ye and our bairn that grows inside ye. It may have taken me a while to unmask the mysterious woman who fell into ma arms, but ye have certainly been a prize worth winning."
Epilogue
Iam a blessed mon in ma middle age," Laird Sinclair declared. "Ma eldest son has his first bairn aboot to be delivered. Ma second son has a wife who is nae far off from delivering their first bairn, and ma only daughter just announced that her second is on the way."
"Haud yer wheeshtt, auld mon," Tavish complained. "This family breeds faster than a fluffle of rabbits. There’s naught to be excited aboot. This keep is already being overrun with weans."
To anyone who did not know him, they would think he was ill-tempered about children, but he did not hide well, nor did he ever really try to hide, that he thoroughly enjoyed being an uncle. He spoiled Wee Liam every time he visited Dunbeath or Tavish visited Varrich. Siùsan's younger half-brothers had returned with them and now fostered with Clan Sinclair, and while Magnus had appointed himself overseer of their training, it was Tavish that led them on the adventures that always got them in trouble but were always the most fun.
"If anyone needs to cool his heels, it's ye," chimed in Mairghread who was seated in her husband's lap while holding their sleeping toddler. "Just ye wait. Yer turn canna be that far off."
"Nae me. I dinna need to marry, and besides how would I ever choose? Nor why would I want to disappoint so many by making myself unavailable?" Tavish laughed at his own jokes but sobered when he looked around and saw four sets of eyes trying to contain their mirth. They were not laughing with him but at him.
"Little brother, ye are bound to see soon enough. Fate doesnae work on yer schedule. Ye follow hers." Alex watched at Brighde waddled towards them. He stood to offer her his seat. She was clearly showing and well into being uncomfortable. If Mairghread's son and the size bairn she expected Siùsan would soon deliver were any indicators, she knew she would be delivering a bairn big enough to swing a sword. Alex stood behind her and rubbed her shoulders.
She caught the end of what her father by marriage was saying.
"I just wish Magnus was here. It's a shame I had to send him off to court on our behalf, but with Siùsan so close to her laying in and Brighde so far along, I couldnae send Callum or Alex. And I need Tavish to stay to train the men."
"And he canna be trusted around all those ladies at court." Mairghread stuck her tongue out at her brother when he growled at her while Tristan sat back and laughed.
Brighde rubbed her ever-expanding belly and smiled as she felt Alex's hands slide over hers. She laced their fingers together as they both patted the life that grew inside her. She still could not believe her good fortune in finding and being accepted by such a family as the one she had been so warmly welcomed into. She counted her blessings daily. Now she wondered which brother would beat the other to the altar, Magnus or Tavish since it was simply a matter of time.
His Highland Lass
The Clan Sinclair, Book 1
An undeniable love... an unexpected match...
Faced with a feud with the Sinclairs that is growing deadly, Laird Tristan Mackay is bound by duty to his clan to make peace with the enemy. Tristan arranges a marriage for his stepbrother, Sir Alan, but never imagines that he would meet the woman he longs to marry. When things sour quickly between Tristan's stepbrother and Lady Mairghread Sinclair, Tristan is determined to make her his. A choice that promises to change his life forever.
Raised with four older warriors for brothers and as the only daughter of the Sinclair laird, Mairghread is independent resourceful, and loyal to her family. When her father arranges a marriage to a man she has never met for the sake and safety of her clan, Mairghread tries to accept her fate. Mairghread is betrothed to one man but it is the dark, handsome, and provocative laird who catches her eye. Arranged to marry Sir Alan, Mairghread finds herself drawn to Laird Tristan Mackay. After meeting her intended, Mairghread knows she cannot go through with the marriage, but she must find a way to end the feud that is tearing the two clans apart.
When the wedding is called off by Mairghread's father, Tristan and Mairghread see an opportunity to be together. Neither of them imagined that they would find the passion that grows between them. However, a spurned mistress and a jilted suitor stand between Tristan and Mairghread's happiness. Tristan and Mairghread must fight for the love they have found with one another.
Destined for another...
Mairghread Sinclair is not prepared for the danger that awaits her while visiting the Mackay clan. She must use her wits to keep herself alive when danger pulls her away from the man she loves.
Fated to be together...
Laird Tristan Mackay was not looking for a wife, but could Lady Mairghread Sinclair be the one to open his heart and bring peace to their clans, or will their passion tear the two clans apart?
Available purchase o
r download on Amazon
His Bonnie Highland Temptation
The Clan Sinclair Book 2
Unwanted and unloved...
Siùsan Mackenzie has spent a lifetime feeling unwanted and unloved after her mother dies in childbirth and her father abandons her for a new wife and new family. Forced to start her life in her clan's village and then brought to the castle as no more than a servant, Siùsan longs for the chance to escape her clan and the hurt of being ignored. When her father, the Mackenzie chief, unexpectedly announces her betrothal, Siùsan is filled with fear that her father is sending her off to an ogre who will treat her no better or possibly even worse. When she discovers who her intended is, she seizes the chance to leave behind those who sought to punish her and manipulate her.
Could Siùsan's father finally have done right by her? Will Siùsan find happiness in her new home, or is her future only to repeat her past?
Unaware and unready...
Callum Sinclair, the heir to Clan Sinclair, knows that he will one day have to marry to carry on his clan's legacy. He just did not know that his bride-to-be would arrive less than a week after his father announced the betrothal. Enjoying the company of women has never been a struggle for Callum, but as are all the men of Clan Sinclair, he is committed to being a faithful husband. When Siùsan arrives, Callum is unprepared for the gift his father has given him in his soon-to-be wife. Callum is eager to get to know his fiery haired bride who barely comes up to his chest, and Siùsan is tempted by Callum's whisky brown eyes and gentle nature.
But if only it were that easy.
A tangled web of jealousy and deceit is woven when members of Siùsan's clan join forces with outsiders to keep them apart.
His Highland Prize (The Clan Sinclair Book 3) Page 26