Nothing to Lose

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Nothing to Lose Page 19

by Angela Winters


  “Now!”

  Everyone went silent.

  Erica was embarrassed as she stood up and came around the table. Jonah was already walking out, assuming that she was following. She picked up speed to keep up with him, but she also hurried just to get out of the room, where everyone was looking at her.

  Her mind was racing a mile a minute. Jonah hadn’t been happy that she’d spent a lot of time at the fund-raiser with Alex. She could tell from the glances he sent her. She ignored him and he seemed to give it up by the end of the evening. Malcolm had asked her to dinner; and although Erica told him she found him to be very nice, she didn’t think it was a good idea. Maybe Malcolm had told Jonah that she’d turned him down?

  No, that couldn’t be it. The anger in Jonah’s eyes told her it was something much more important. For some reason, she suspected it had to do with Sherise.

  He didn’t lead her to his office. Instead, he stopped at a private room in the hallway and went inside. She quickly followed him in and closed the door behind them.

  “What the fuck is this?” Jonah asked, shoving a letter at her.

  Erica took it, keeping her eye on him as she opened it.

  “That was on my desk this morning,” he said. “Delivered to the fucking building.”

  It was inside a regular-sized white envelope, no return address. The letter was on colored paper, a very light, almost baby blue sheet of stationery, with hunter green ribbons at the top and bottom. It looked familiar to Erica; but before she could think further on that, she read the words that had been typed: You don’t deserve this. You ruin lives. You cheat. I can prove it. Drop out or else.

  It wasn’t signed by anyone.

  “I didn’t send it to you,” she said.

  “You know who did?” he asked. “Sherise! That’s who.”

  Erica handed the letter back to him. “Think about what you’re saying. She has just as much to lose as you do if this came to light.”

  Jonah laughed. “Just as much? Hell no. She’ll just go back to being a nobody. I’d lose my chance to be the most powerful man in the world. They can hardly compare.”

  “Unlike you,” Erica said, “losing her family is more important than running the world. Your wife would just down a few more shots of vodka and pretend like nothing happened. Justin would actually give a shit. She wouldn’t do this.”

  “She wants me to drop out of this race,” Jonah said. “If you notice, there’s no threat to go to the press. That’s because the person who sent this doesn’t want it in the press. They just want me to go away, so it never gets a chance to get into the press. That’s her.”

  “Of course her life would be much easier if you didn’t run,” Erica said, “but this isn’t her style. Sending a cryptic letter. That’s amateurish, hustler stuff that Sherise wouldn’t be caught dead . . .”

  Erica snatched the paper back from Jonah, feeling a sudden shock at what leapt into her mind. She looked at the stationery again and it hit her. It was familiar to her!

  “Holy shit,” was all she could say.

  “What?” Jonah asked.

  She looked at him, seeing the anger in his eyes. Jonah was not a man to threaten. This wasn’t going to end well at all.

  “Tell me,” he demanded.

  She shook her head. “It’s not Sherise. This is beneath her, and you know it. Just stay away from her.”

  “Fuck that,” Jonah said. “Whoever this is has just declared war on me and . . .”

  Jonah was studying her face. Erica could see he was working something out, and she wanted desperately to turn away from him. But she couldn’t. He was going to figure it out.

  “You recognize this paper,” he said. “You know who this is.”

  “Jonah—”

  “That piece of shit.” Jonah seized the paper back from her and crumpled it up before throwing it against the wall. “I will kill that little shit.”

  “Don’t say that!” Erica yelled.

  “Keep your voice down,” he ordered.

  “I won’t! Not if you keep threatening Terrell!”

  “Shut up.” He grabbed her arms to get her under control.

  Erica broke free of his grasp and backed away. “Take that back. You won’t kill him.”

  “You can’t possibly still give a shit about him,” Jonah said. “How many times has he let you down?”

  “Almost as many as you have,” Erica said. “And, yes, I’ll always give a shit about him. I loved him once. We were engaged.”

  “That wasn’t real,” Jonah said dismissively.

  Erica knew she shouldn’t let Jonah’s words hurt her, but that stung. He didn’t really know anything about her and Terrell. Still, it made her insanely angry to hear him dismiss their love like that.

  “You are such an asshole,” she said.

  “I’m worse than that,” he warned, seething with danger. “Much worse, and that little thug is about to find out.”

  “No,” Erica said. “You promised you wouldn’t touch him.”

  “That deal I made with you pertained to another matter,” he said. “You agreed to stay away from him, then so would I. This is different. He’s a threat to my plan, to what I’ve worked my life for.”

  “I don’t care,” Erica said, summoning a level of courage she didn’t even know she had. She stared up at him, resolute and unwavering. “You won’t hurt him. I won’t let you.”

  “You can’t stop me,” he said.

  “Well, then,” she answered back, “I won’t let you get away with it.”

  They stared each other down for several seconds. Erica felt her knees begin to weaken and she could barely breathe. Was it showing? Probably, but she couldn’t back down. Terrell’s life depended on her staying strong. No, she didn’t love him anymore, want him anymore. But Erica couldn’t live with herself if she let Jonah do something to him—even if Terrell deserved it for getting into a fight he couldn’t possibly win, over and over again.

  Jonah blinked first. He sighed, then looked past her for a second, as if deciding this wasn’t worth it. When he looked at Erica again, his expression was softer than before, but still very serious.

  “I’d get away with it, Erica. I think you know that.”

  She was visibly upset and that seemed to bother him a little.

  “I wouldn’t hurt you,” he said, “but I wouldn’t let you hurt me either.”

  “I’d try my hardest,” she said, feeling herself shaking all over, and hoping it didn’t show.

  He smiled at her, seeming impressed. Erica realized that this was the kind of thing Jonah admired. It made her think he might be crazy. Or maybe she was crazy for basically threatening him to his face. Either way, she might have won this battle for now.

  “Give me a chance to find him,” she said. “I don’t know exactly what he’s doing now, but I can find out from my brother—”

  “He’s washing cars in Columbia Heights,” Jonah said. “He’s been there since he was fired from Destin, five months ago.”

  “Of course you’d know,” Erica said.

  “I make it a practice to keep track of anyone who threatened me,” Jonah said.

  “I guess I just added myself to that list, huh?” Erica asked.

  “I don’t need to keep track of you, Erica.” He smiled softly. “You’re right next to me.”

  “I’ll handle this,” she said.

  His smile faded, seeming annoyed at having to return to the topic at hand.

  “I’ll give you some time,” he said flatly. “If I don’t hear something from you in the next few days that makes me feel better about this, your boy is history.”

  He walked to the door; but before opening it, he turned back to her. “Just in case, you might want to say your good-byes to him either way.”

  After he left, Erica grabbed her phone out of her pocket and started texting both of her girls immediately. At the last minute, she thought about it and only texted Billie. The last thing she needed was another Sherise fr
eak-out session. She wanted to be the only one freaking out right now.

  Billie felt greedy and she loved it. It had been a long, long time since she’d had sex with no guilt, shame, or secrecy attached to it. It was liberating and totally arousing.

  After freshening up in her bathroom after an hour-long lovemaking session with Michael, she returned to her bedroom with the full intention of a second round. However, the look on Michael’s face when he turned to her told her that wasn’t going to happen.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  As Billie reached the bed, he held up what was in his hand. It was her phone. She snatched it away from him.

  “What are you doing looking at my phone?” she asked, angry.

  “I wasn’t,” he said. “It made a sound and I was going to call you to tell you, but I noticed the text.”

  “You noticed?” she asked.

  Looking down at the screen, she saw it was a log of a few texts she and Erica had traded before she headed to the bathroom.

  “You’re mad because I texted in bed after sex?”

  “You know that’s not it,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

  Billie rolled her eyes. “Because I was texting about Porter? You really shouldn’t have read that.”

  After mentioning Erica’s dilemma with Terrell, Billie briefly mentioned her victory over Porter at her apartment and later at the conference. It was harmless. As far as Billie was concerned, there was no reason for Michael to be upset.

  “I shouldn’t have,” he said, seeming somewhat remorseful, “but I did, and I can’t believe you’re talking about your ex right after having sex with me. We discussed this, didn’t we?”

  “We discussed that I wouldn’t talk to you about Porter.” She placed the phone on the nightstand, standing at the edge of the bed. “And I haven’t. You can’t possibly have meant that I don’t talk about him to anyone.”

  “No, of course I didn’t.” He was clearly still unsatisfied.

  “My conversations with my girlfriends aren’t any of your business.” She walked to the end of the bed and reached for her bathrobe, not really in the mood anymore. “Stay away from my phone.”

  “You’re right,” he said. “But you can’t expect me not to be upset. We just had what I thought was amazing sex, but the first thing you do once it’s over is text your girlfriend about our interaction with your ex.”

  She put her robe on and sat down on the edge of the bed. “It’s out of context, Michael. She was trying to come up with ideas on how to handle her ex.”

  “I wasn’t asking for an explanation,” he said.

  “You don’t deserve one!” she exclaimed. “But since you seem to misunderstand everything that has to do with him, I thought I’d tell you.”

  He looked at her crisply. “Fine. Then, since you’re explaining, why? Why did you feel the need to humiliate him again?”

  “Honestly,” she said, standing up again. “He humiliated himself. But my motive was revenge for ruining our night together last week. I wanted him to know, once and for all, I wasn’t one to fuck with.”

  Michael laughed, shaking his head, and it infuriated Billie.

  “This is funny to you now?” she asked. “At first, you’re upset. Now you think it’s a joke? I don’t get it with you, Michael.”

  “You don’t get it at all,” he said. “Porter didn’t ruin our night, Billie. You did. You just want to blame it on him so you can excuse your little obsession with him.”

  “Obsession?” Billie laughed incredulously. “You’re way out of line.”

  “Revenge never goes the way you want it to, unless you’re evil enough to risk everything. You’re not evil, Billie. You’re just angry. For someone like you, revenge will only end up hurting you more.”

  Billie glared at him with burning anger. “You’re just like him.”

  His eyes widened in shock. “I’m what?”

  “You’re just like him,” she repeated. “You think I’m weak. You think you know me, like you have my number. I’m not strong enough to follow through on my threats, to win a fight.”

  “Billie.” Michael got up from the bed and turned to face her. “You took that wrong. Maybe I said it wrong. I don’t think of you that way. I was just saying—”

  “That I’m not strong enough to win this battle!”

  “What battle?” he asked.

  “This battle we’ve been waging since I left him! You think I’m too delicate to win it, so I should just get out. That’s what he thought, and he was right, at first. That’s why I always ended up getting the short end of every fucking stick!”

  “Billie.” Michael started walking toward her. “You need to calm down. You’re getting too emotional.”

  “I haven’t seen my daughter in eight months!” she yelled. “So fuck him, and fuck you, Michael. I’m not backing down.”

  “Billie, I’m sorry,” he said with a sigh. “I was just saying—”

  “You need to leave.”

  Billie darted for the door to her bedroom. She opened it wide, refusing to look at him.

  “Billie, please.”

  “Leave!” she yelled. “I want you out of my house, now!”

  Erica was feeling some panic setting in. At the time, when she’d promised Jonah she could handle Terrell yesterday, she’d felt confident she could do it. But as every hour ticked by, she was less so. She needed to talk to her girls, and she was going to get that chance later tonight when they met.

  Still, she was going crazy at work and needed something to help her calm down. All she could think of was Alex. If she hung out with him for a bit, she could unwind like she usually did. He’d been in meetings all morning, but she heard that meeting was over, so she headed over to his office. He wasn’t there, so she assumed he was still in the conference room and headed there.

  When she reached the main conference room, it was empty. She was about to turn and leave, when the door on the other side of the room opened. In walked Juliet Nolan. She looked like the perfect political wife—this time dressed in a smart blue skirt suit, with flowers at the edges of the jacket. Her hair was down, making her look a little younger than usual. With makeup on, hiding the aging that drinking had done to her, she looked much younger, but still unhappy.

  “Well,” Juliet said, with a sly smile on her face, “if it isn’t little Erica.”

  Erica sighed, deciding to turn and leave instead of putting up with this bitch. She didn’t need this.

  “What are you afraid of?” Juliet called after her.

  Erica had the door halfway open and she wanted to listen to the voice that told her just to keep going. She really wanted to.

  “I’m not afraid of you,” she said, turning back to her. “And I’m not ‘little.’ ”

  Juliet looked her up and down, with a nod, which made Erica want to walk across the room and punch her in the face.

  “Are you sober?” Erica asked with as fake a smile as she could imagine.

  “For now,” Juliet said, not seeming fazed by the comment. “But I’m looking for my husband, so I probably won’t be a couple of hours from now.”

  “That’s more information than I needed,” Erica said. “I’m gonna leave you to—”

  “I don’t blame you,” Juliet said.

  “That’s good,” Erica responded. “Because I didn’t do anything.”

  “I do blame your mother, though.”

  Erica quickly became infuriated at the mention of her mother, a hot button in any situation, but especially as an accusation from this woman.

  “My mother didn’t do anything to you,” Erica said. “Just don’t mention her, Juliet. She’s not for you to mention.”

  Juliet laughed. “Didn’t do anything to me? She slept with my husband. I would suggest that qualifies as ‘doing something’ to me and gives me the right to mention her.”

  “She didn’t sleep with your husband.” Erica walked over to her, close enough to point her finger in her face
. “Don’t you talk about my mother like that! She would never be someone’s mistress. He wasn’t your husband.”

  “He was!” Juliet screamed.

  “You’re a fucking liar!” Erica yelled. “He hadn’t even met you when they were together.”

  “Don’t try and bullshit me,” Juliet said. “I don’t know what your mom or Jonah told you, and I really don’t give a shit. I know he slept with her right after we got married. I almost divorced him over it.”

  “No!” Erica was trying desperately to control her outrage, but she was losing that battle. “You’re not gonna get away with that. She would have never, ever—”

  “Erica!”

  She swung around to see Alex, who was standing at the door, rushing toward her. He grabbed her by the arm, pulling her back. She was consumed with rage; her instinct was making her try to break free of his grasp.

  “Let me go!”

  “No!” Alex tightened his grip. “What are you doing?”

  Erica turned to Juliet, who had an evil smile on her face.

  “You know it’s true.” Juliet turned around and left out the door she had come in.

  “That bitch is a liar,” Erica said.

  “What is she talking about?” Alex asked, still gripping her tightly. “Why are you so crazed? That’s Jonah’s wife, for Christ’s sake.”

  “I don’t care,” Erica said. “She’s lying!”

  “About what?” Alex asked.

  Erica was just about to tell him everything, but then she caught herself. What was she doing? She couldn’t do this.

  “What did you hear?” she asked, trying to calm down.

  “I heard yelling,” he said. “When I opened the door, you told her she wasn’t going to talk about someone like that. Who are you talking about?”

  “I can’t tell you.” Erica finally broke free of him, but she was still shaking all over.

  “Look at you,” he said. “You’re falling apart. You have to tell me what’s going on.”

  “I can’t.” Erica started to cry. “I can’t. It’s too fucked up. I just gotta get out of here.”

  “Stop.”

  Alex grabbed her as she tried to pass him. She pushed away, but he pulled her close. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly. Although she was feeling like such a fool for crying, she felt better in his arms.

 

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