by Quil Carter
Well, almost all of them.
Sasha didn’t know how it worked, only that it must be automatic. Somehow, fucking somehow, he’d been able to hide things from Kheva.
The more Sasha thought about it, the more it made sense. Kheva had never caught on that Sasha was planning on escaping, nor did he realize that Sasha had been a forced witness to the childhood memories that plagued him; the ones Rob wanted so dearly.
Fuck, and Rob… what the fuck to do about Rob.
Sasha didn’t want to sell him out, but he did feel those shreds of loyalty towards Kheva. However, shreds or not, what Kheva was doing to him was wrong.
And Rob only wanted to escape.
Just like I do…
‘Play along,’ Rob whispered in his mind. ‘Play along and get stronger.’
What else could he fucking do? He still wanted to go home.
“I’m sorry, Kheva,” Sasha said quietly. “It won’t happen again.”
Kheva’s glaring eyes pierced him, the laser beams digging deep enough for Sasha to feel them inside of his brain.
“Oh, it better not, nightcrawler,” Kheva said coolly. “You do not want to know what I’ll do to you if you disappoint me like this again.”
Just fucking play along…
…and get stronger.
CHAPTER 18
The formerly dark corner of Sasha’s head was really starting to come together. At first, he’d wanted to make the new room look like his apartment back home, but after an unimpressed look and a few snide remarks from Kheva, he’d decided to upgrade and make it into his dream room.
It still wasn’t much, nowhere near as elegantly decorated as Kheva’s, which was a piece of artwork in itself, but it was a start––at the very least it was a start.
Sasha stood in the middle of his room and looked around. He’d borrowed most of Kheva’s furniture, so the couch he had in front of the marble mantle fireplace was microsuede and comfortable, and the recliner chair was so squishy one could sink into it and never be seen again. He also had Victorian paintings on his rich brown walls, just to add some class, but also decided to put up a drawing of a squirrel that Jobe had drawn him one time when he was drunk.
Sasha felt Kheva’s presence and smiled at him. “What do you think?” he said. He tried to see if he could physically see Kheva, but his powers weren’t developed enough. All he could manage was the overwhelming feeling of Kheva’s presence, that sixth sense that identified the Master. It was like how wolves could recognize someone from their own pack, Kheva smelled like Kheva and no one could ever replicate it.
“Interesting. It’s a start,” Kheva said. The voice was deep inside of Sasha’s head, but since Sasha was inside of his own head as well, it was as if Kheva was speaking directly to him. “Once you develop your own personality, your own style, you’ll find more of your own things to put up in this room. Kel’s room also mirrored my own when he first created it, now only a quarter of his things are mine.”
“And this room… this is where my abilities come from?” Sasha asked.
He felt Kheva shake his head no. “This is my way of simplifying it so you understand it,” Kheva explained. “If you will… your own imagination, your own inner monologues are a swirl of thoughts inside of your brain. Correct?”
Sasha nodded.
“This dark corner that you found. It wasn’t so much of a dark corner, as it was a pool of darkness you can dive into, a break in the fabric of your mind that you can slip through like a black hole. A normal human does not have this rip in the fabric, this pool…” Kheva explained. “I found mine during my own personal experiences… and the more time I spent inside of that pool, the more that special corner in my head took shape. I decided to decorate it and call it my own personal oasis, and it stuck. Once I began to train Kel, I realized having him create his own personal oasis helped him find that dark pool easier, it helped for him to have a sort of homing beacon to go towards when I needed him to tap into those abilities.”
Sasha looked around his own personal room. It was amazing just how clear he could see everything. Eventually, he’d be powerful enough to have Kheva physically in front of him.
Sasha and Kheva both tuned their attention when Kel’s presence was felt.
“Hi, Sashy!” Kel said happily. “Master, dinner is ready. Would you like me to put it on warm until you’re finished with Sasha?”
“No, he’s been in here long enough,” Kheva responded. Sasha then felt a pressure on him, like a slow suction of a vacuum. “Let’s go, nightcrawler.”
Sasha was suddenly yanked backwards, and with a startled yelp, he was pulled backwards out of that dark corner of his mind.
Sasha gasped and his eyes flew open. He squinted his eyes to get them to adjust, and smiled when he saw Kheva sitting on the couch beside him. The Master’s eyes were open, no squinting, no getting used to being back in reality, he’d done this a million times and to go inside of his own mind seemed as routine as brushing one’s teeth.
“It’s really getting easier,” Sasha said, but before those words even left his mouth, there was a stab of pain. He winced and held a hand to his head. “Or not… shit.”
“You were inside of there for a long time,” he heard Kheva explain beside him. Sasha’s eyes were now closed, the familiar throb breaking through his previous calm to make itself known. “It drains you, and you’re still easily drained. You’ll be in agony by the late evening.”
“Late evening? Already?” Sasha said as he rubbed his head. “It drains me that bad?”
Kheva nodded and rose, behind him, Kel was setting down dishes, a resting smile on his face. “It will for a long time. The stronger your powers become, the more you need it. And the more you use them, the more you need it. Did you even think about such things during that moronic escape attempt?”
Kheva’s sharp voice immediately brought a quiver of fear to Sasha’s heart, and the direct dig at his failed escape had him worried that Kheva was about to go off on him again. He’d only gotten out of that shed yesterday and things were still rather… tense between the two of them.
“I did…” Sasha said quietly. He stood up after Kheva did and timidly walked behind him as Kheva made his way to the dining room table. He didn’t know if he was going to be allowed to eat tonight. Yesterday he’d been bathing while Kel and Kheva had eaten, and hadn’t the nerve to ask if anything had been left for him. And today… besides Kel bringing him a granola bar for breakfast, nothing had been offered to him. “I… I was scared, Master Kheva.”
“Of what?”
Sasha looked up and met Kheva’s gaze. The man was standing by the set table, freshly stoked green and gold fire in his eyes. Those eyes glared their warning, like a brightly-coloured snake cautioning all others that it was venomous and prepared to strike.
Sasha was silent, but that was a mistake in itself.
“I asked you a damn question, nightcrawler,” Kheva snarled. “You would do best not to test my patience with you. You’ve already disappointed me enough with your idiotic actions.”
Sasha’s lower lip tightened, his gaze now broken and dangling over his feet like a snapped string.
“He doesn’t like it when I fuck him,” Kel suddenly said, his tone dejected and hurt. “I thought it was fun but he’s scared, Master. I can feel his fear. Can’t you–”
Sasha’s eyes enlarged with shock when Kheva whirled around and backhanded Kel across the mouth, the force of it making Kel drop the bottle of soy sauce and the dish of butter he was bringing to the table. Both items landed on the floor with a loud clang, sending Jye speeding out of his cat door and Kel stumbling backwards until he hit the kitchen island.
“I didn’t ask you a fucking thing,” Kheva snarled, Kel’s terrorized eyes shooting up to him and his body scrunching back. “Did I direct this question at you?”
“No!” Kel cried. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I didn’t think.”
“No, you’re not too good at that, are you?” Kheva
snapped. “Pick that shit up and shut your fucking mouth.” Kel scrambled away, like a dog you were aiming a kick at, and grabbed a dish towel to begin cleaning up the mess.
All Sasha could do was stare, fear consuming him outright and welding his feet to the bear rug he was standing on top of. He stood completely still, hoping that Kheva’s glaring eyes wouldn’t fix on him again.
But there was never much hope in that, as soon as Kheva turned from Kel, his eyes fixed themselves on Sasha, like heat-seeking missiles, and to Sasha’s horror, he glided towards him.
A faint smile, one that seeped a psychotic evil that only Kheva could master, appeared on his lips.
“Oh, sad, sad little nightcrawler,” Kheva hissed. He stopped when his face was right in front of Sasha’s, invading the personal bubble of space that didn’t exist in Ciel Lake. “It terrorized you, didn’t it?” Sasha sucked in a breath when the images of that night were pushed into his memory. Images that he knew Kheva himself was implanting.
Kel, crushed against his body, moaning into his ear as he thrusted himself deep inside of him. His frame had consumed Sasha, his energy forced upon him. The pain was bad enough, but it was the psychological terror that had grasped him with no intentions of letting go.
A terror that didn’t wane over time, it only got worse, then shifted into humiliation with what Kheva did after.
Sasha’s eyes weren’t shut, but in front of his vision he could see perfectly the face of Kheva. He was buried between his legs, licking and consuming the blood and cum that was leaking out of him. The sensations were confusing, and shameful. It felt so good, his body responded to it without a second thought, but his mind had been screaming from fear, ringing alarms and running around chaotic, wanting desperately to escape at all costs.
It’ll happen again. I know it’ll happen again.
And I can’t escape it. I can’t escape what they’ll do to me. I’m at their mercy.
No… I’m solely at Kheva’s mercy, and he won’t stop.
Another image. The incident that had taken place in Kheva’s office. There was even more confusion attached to what had happened there.
Down on my knees, giving my first blow job, the taste of blood heavy in my mouth from his repeated blows.
I’d never touched another man’s cock. I’d definitely never had one in my mouth. It tasted… like when you lick your own hand, but hot, alive in my mouth. It twitched and shuddered, especially right before he came.
And the cum…
Sasha’s jaw clenched tight.
“Admit you liked it, nightcrawler,” Kheva growled in his ear. Sasha hissed through his tightly shut teeth when he felt Kheva rest a hand against his groin. “You loved taking my cum. You loved it so much… you took it twice.” Sasha could feel Kheva’s hot breath against his ear, it was flooding his body with sensations that weren’t welcome. How could his body betray him in such a way?
I fucking hate you. I fucking hate you for doing this to me.
Kheva’s low laugh made another spring of feelings emerge, but these ones held no hidden strings of unwanted pleasure. No, that laugh brought on its heel’s only the purest of fear.
“You don’t need to like me, nightcrawler,” Kheva growled. “You need to love me.”
I’ll keep escaping. I’ll keep running…
‘And I will keep finding you, and I will keep bringing you home,’ Kheva said, his voice echoing inside of his mind. ‘You can’t escape me, and even if I have only ashes to mould into the nightcrawler I see hidden deep inside of you––I will.’
Sasha let out a sob and pulled away from Kheva’s touch. He turned from him, his hand over his mouth and his body trembling.
“Please don’t,” Sasha begged. “Everything else I can do… just, fuck, I can’t handle that. I just fucking can’t.”
Behind him, he heard another one of Kheva’s dropped laughs, this one scraping the bottom of the sea with its low tones. “I know you can’t,” he said amused. “Why do you think I enjoyed it so much?” Then his voice rose, and when he spoke, it was light and jovial. “Dinner time. Sasha, take your seat. Kel worked hard on this meal and you will give him the appreciation he deserves.”
Sasha’s eyes burned, but he bit his lip and forced the tears away from his eyes. He was tired of letting his emotions get to him––he was tired of giving Kheva the reactions he wanted. He… he had to be strong, even in the face of what Sasha suspected was pure evil.
I can’t escape him.
But as Sasha sat down beside Kheva, he touched the fringes of that dark place inside of his head and found the faint area Rob had pointed out, the area that Kheva could not touch. It did appear as if his mind automatically knew when certain thoughts had to be stored in there.
Which meant Sasha was free to think of the one thought he knew Kheva would kill him for:
I may not be able to escape you… but I fucking swear, I’m going to help free Rob from you.
And free myself of you.
Sasha took in a deep breath, and sat down, and when he looked over at Kheva, there was no reaction that he’d heard any of the forbidden thoughts inside of his head.
Kheva just stared forward, a glass of red wine being swirled in his hand.
Kel came to the table with a stir-fry popping and sizzling in his and Kheva’s dishes. Beside the colourful stir-fry, with broccoli, carrots, peas, and corn from their garden in it, and what Sasha assumed was beef, there was a helping of white rice, butter melting in the middle of the snow mound.
They sat down and Sasha was surprised and grateful when Kheva started feeding him too. During the meal, he learned from Kel that the meat they were having was rabbit. He’d never had rabbit before and it made him take pause, especially when Kel explained just how the rabbits were caught.
The damn African cat apparently.
But the moment Kheva offered him another forkful, he was opening his mouth like a good little nightcrawler and received some Peter Cottontail.
“Twice a year we go to our rabbit man and we get more rabbits,” Kel continued to explain. Their meal was winding down, and for once, Sasha was full. There was still that nagging feeling that Kheva was being gracious to him when he didn’t deserve it, but Sasha was just so happy to be getting food… he didn’t want to knock it.
“Then we let those rabbits go, some of them in the field, and some in the forest. Jye kills all of them in about six months and we have to get more. Sometimes we let Jye eat his own rabbits, but sometimes we eat them ourselves and he gets the bones and the head and the parts we don’t use,” he continued.
“The rabbits don’t make more little rabbits?” Sasha asked. He raised both eyebrows when Kheva slid his wine glass over to him. Never in his entire time here had Kheva offered him a drink of his wine. “Wow, thanks.” He picked up the glass and took a drink. Hopefully this also meant he’d get to recharge tonight. Kheva’s prediction had been correct, his head was really starting to bother him.
“No, the rabbits are all fixed,” Kel said. “That way Kheva has control over their numbers.”
“We’ll be getting more soon, I suppose,” Kheva said, and he rose. “Help Keluva clean up and you two may join me in the living room. I have work to do in my office until then. You may finish the wine.” He left then, leaving a perplexed Sasha with the half-glass of wine.
“He’s going to kill me tonight, isn’t he?” Sasha said quietly when Kheva’s office door closed. “That’s why I was fed so nicely and given this wine. This is like the final meal to a man on death row.”
Kel laughed. “Master Kheva is wonderful,” he said, and when he beamed at Sasha, there was devotion in his eyes. “He loves us very much.”
A throb of pain began to pulse behind his eyes. Sasha held up a hand and grimaced, then took another gulp of wine. Even though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he rose and began helping Kel clean up the kitchen. “Do you… think I’ll be able to drink tonight?” Sasha asked. The lights were beginning to bother him, t
he migraine was increasing in intensity like it had been given a shot of gasoline.
Kel turned, the leftover rabbit stir-fry resting on the dish in his hand, and grinned at Sasha. “Yes,” he said. “We’re all going to be recharging tonight.”
Sasha paused, the glass halfway up to his mouth. The way that Kel said that released a dam of anxiety, a dam that was constantly on the verge of bursting. “You’re not…” His mouth went dry and his body stiffened, as if he was an antelope remaining perfectly still, hoping the predator didn’t see them. “You’re not doing it again…” And then his breathing started to become short.
Kel clucked his tongue and began dumping the remaining rice into a Tupperware container. “Poor Sashy. You shouldn’t have run away. How else are we supposed to restock?”
“Restock?” Sasha said slowly. “What… do you mean?”
“It means you wasted several months worth of stock, Sasha Zakharin,” Kheva’s cold and biting voice sounded from the living room. “You stole our frozen fluid and tossed it in the front seat. Tell me, nightcrawler, did you really think you’d get away with wasting such precious resources?”
Sasha stared at him, his mind both racing and stalling at the same time. He’d completely forgotten about that. His brain had never questioned what had happened to the Ziploc bag.
It hadn’t been recovered… or at least not until it was too late.
“Oh, shit,” Sasha whispered. He backed up from Kheva until his back hit the kitchen island. “I’m… I’m sorry.”
Kheva chuckled, and with a gasp from Sasha, he quickly advanced on him until his face was only inches away from Sasha’s.
“Don’t be sorry, nightcrawler,” Kheva said, his voice a gravelly whisper. He stared Sasha down, both oculars bright and his thin pink lips split in a depraved smile. “Do I look angry to you?” He leaned down, and Sasha sucked in a breath when he felt lips against his neck. “You’re going to restock it for me. I’d decided I wouldn’t subject you to such things until my and Kel’s storage ran out. But you just insisted on it, didn’t you? In your own–” Kheva’s lips began to peck their way up Sasha’s neck, until they were resting near Sasha’s ear. “–little way.”