Kaird finally opened his mouth, "That feeling that you feel is because you aren't supposed to be here. This place was prepared for the half-elf, Jaxius. Not you."
"Then I am here by right. Jaxius deserves to live. He has much good that he can do yet."
"Oh, I know." Kaird laughed. "You mistake me, young one. I do not, nor have I ever intended to keep the Returned One in this place forever. I simply knew that my time to teach him was running short. Here in this realm that I have created, I can do much more to show Jaxius of the life that he needs to know."
"Returned One? He said you called him that before. What does it mean?"
"That is a question that the world shall soon know the answer to. Let me tell you a little of how the world works. You are a man now, you can know these things." Kaird said with a giggle.
Bergar only smirked, not caring for the old man's humor.
"The world is ever balancing, like a hard packed snow on a layer of powdered fluff. One ill-placed step in the wrong direction and the whole thing could come crashing down. Do you follow me?"
Bergar nodded, although he did not yet understand exactly where the old man was going.
"In the time that you and Jaxius and Tolian, and your father, even, live in, this time, the fluff and powder that you have had faith in for so long is shaking under the weight of the events of the world. Does that show you where I am going?" Kaird asked as if he already knew what was brewing in Bergar's mind.
Bergar nodded. He was slowly and surely absorbing all of this information.
"Now, when the world is preparing for such devastation, certain heroes that she has tucked away are pushed forth. Brought to the world to save it and ensure that there is no avalanche. Our friend Jaxius is one such creature."
"He is?" Bergar asked.
"Yes." Kaird took up the answer quickly. "He is an old soul. Far older than I. I would dare say older than the most ancient trees in the world."
Bergar opted to hold his tongue and await the answers that were going to be given to him.
"I trudged through history after my death and found the memories that Jaxius is missing. I brought them all here, so that he could experience them. I didn't expect you, though. I guess I should have known who would be reading the spell and what your intentions would be.."
"What did the spell do exactly? I mean, I was reading it just like Tolian had taught me, and then I was here."
"It brought you here. Now, don't you feel silly?" Kaird answered chuckling quietly. He raised an eyebrow indicating to Bergar that he should have thought about his question more. "Shall we get started then?"
"Started with what?" Bergar asked.
"We now have to figure out how to get all of this..." Kaird stretched out an arm presenting the plains before him. "In here." He tapped Bergar on the side of the head with a bony outstretched finger.
"But doesn't Jaxius need to know all of this and not me?"
"Yes, but he isn't here now is he?"
Accepting the answer as the only possible explanation, Bergar nodded. "Let's get started then."
Chapter Thirty-one
"Jaxius," a familiar voice said. "Returned One."
"Kaird?" Jaxius asked. He cracked his groggy eyes and blinked a few times letting the dim red light filter through. A friendly face leaned into view. He recognized the face, but it had aged in the months since they had last spoken.
"No, Stranger, it's me," Bergar said.
Jaxius opened his eyes wide and looked around. It was, indeed, the young barbarian. The boy's round face showed the same mirthful smile and shining eyes which Jaxius had come to associate with his somewhat fallen friend. However, the corners of his eyes and mouth were wrinkled with age, and his long flowing hair was shades of gray streaked with stark white. Bergar moved away from him. Jaxius noticed that he was lying on hard, dry ground with torrential winds whipping all around him. He pulled his heavy body up to a seated position and rested his head in his hands.
"Am I...?" Jaxius asked. "Did that little..."
"No," Bergar chuckled. "No, you are very much alive. I have some things to show you."
Bergar turned and walked away. Jaxius scrambled to stand and catch the young man who beamed with life.
"Am I dreaming?" he asked after he caught up with Bergar.
"Not exactly, but maybe," Bergar replied.
"Now you sound like Chlora."
Bergar stifled another chuckle. "That, I am definitely not. I am very much Bergar, son of Grundar. I was brought here by the spell that Kaird left with you. Now, where is that old shaman?"
"He's here?" Jaxius asked. "You have had a chance to speak with him?"
"A chance? Yes, he and I have tended this landscape for years. I have memorized every rock and every hole. That's why I am here."
"Wait. I don't understand. You have been here for years? We only cast the spell a couple of nights ago."
"I know. Time doesn't work the same here. As it does in the mortal world. That's why Kaird created it. He intended for you to come here and learn about yourself. Then return and miss little more than a night's sleep."
Jaxius scanned the desolate landscape. He noted the great pits that marked the plain below and the smoke that rose from them. He listened as the wind blasted his half-elven ears with its thunderous roar, He smelled the sulfur and felt the heat of the fires.
"What am I to learn here?"
"Your past, silly," a jubilant old voice arose from just beyond the cliff.
Jaxius crept to the edge and looked over. What he saw stunned him. The mystic stood a few feet from the edge of the cliff suspended in mid-air with his arms crossed and his long blonde beard flowing in the wind. Contrary to Bergar, the old mystic appeared more youthful than Jaxius remembered.
"Kaird?"
"Who else would I be? Of course, I am Kaird. This is my spell-land isn't it?"
"Kaird, why am I here? And no riddles. Just tell me."
"It's better that I show you," Kaird answered.
"Take my hand, friend," Bergar said.
Jaxius, not sure what to make of his situation, did as he was told. Bergar stepped to the edge of the cliff and walked right off, squeezing Jaxius' hand tightly. Bergar floated in the air, just like Kaird. To Jaxius' surprise, he, himself, did not plummet to his death either.
"You'll be fine if you let go. I made this place so we can easily move about. You can fly, skip, or jump as you please here." Kaird said.
Jaxius tried taking a step in the air but went nowhere.
"You have to want to move. Tell yourself that you are going to and you will," Bergar said.
Jaxius did just that. He imagined himself moving forward, and, much to his surprise, he floated forward several inches. Making sure that he was not just caught in the wind he imagined himself in reverse and again succeeded.
"Now that you've gotten accustomed to that, we have much work to do," Kaird said. He slid up next to Jaxius, clasped his forearm, and sped down to the plain below.
Amidst the craters and geysers of smoke, those chimneys to some great unknown furnace, a long table sat adorned with a feast. Large platters laden with exotic looking fruits and vegetables mingled with trays of meats and breads. A few pots of aromatic stew steamed between them.
"What is this?" Jaxius asked.
"These are your memories," Kaird said. Bergar affirmed this with a nod. "When Bergar first arrived we set about trying to teach him the memories through experience. That proved tedious and, in the end, impossible. No matter how hard we tried, young Bergar here couldn't get it. He kept wanting to change them. This got me to thinking that you would probably do the same. So, we took a break and thought up this way. Now, I hope you are hungry."
Jaxius had to admit that the few berries and nuts had not sated his growing appetite, "Yes. I am. But..."
"Good, then let us eat," Kaird said. He snapped his finger and a chair slid behind and under Jaxius.
"I suggest you start light. Like with this," Bergar said and
then tossed him a round piece of red and orange fruit that looked like a large mango.
Jaxius raised an eyebrow and stared at the fruit. He sniffed it, decided it couldn't hurt, and bit into the fruit. Its yellow juices exploded into his mouth and dribbled down his chin. It was the most flavorful food that he had ever put in his mouth. He chewed, and a grin spread across his face.
"Mm, thifs, ifs goomd shtuff," he said.
Bergar and Kaird roared with laughter.
"Don't praise the cook, till you've had the main course," Kaird said.
Jaxius took bite after bite out of the strange fruit. When he had finally swallowed the last bite, he blinked several times and looked around. The confusion on his face mingled with a growing awareness.
"Yes?" Kaird asked leaning forward. "Tell me what you know."
"I remember being a small boy. But not me exactly. My ears were longer, much longer. Longer than an elf's even. And my hair... the brightest green. I remember walking through the woods and something large and blue and scary stepping from behind a tree. It had great deer horns and thick, muscled arms that were too long for its body. Its head was human-like, but thick, almost dwarven. It saw me. I tensed. I was scared. And then it bowed low to the ground and groaned a deep groan. I think it was talking to me, but I can't understand it. But I did then, I just can't now."
Having recounted the tale, Jaxius could barely believe himself. He had a genuine memory of another lifetime. He knew it as a memory, he could feel it in the back of his mind. He felt something else too... hungry.
Jaxius tore into bite after bite of the huge meal laid out before him. Every bite brought a new realization of a life long past. Also, every bite left him hungry for more. He ate for hours, relishing some dishes longer than others.
"I was a king," Jaxius said. His eyes lit up at the realization.
"Not just a king. Upuchwe." Kaird said. "The king of all of the faeries. The last king of the faer folk."
"I see now. I came from the Faemoch to the physical world to protect my children. The first of the elves that I had helped to father. By the gods..." Jaxius slumped back at this realization. It was almost too much for him to bear. He had created the elves. One of the oldest races of the world. It was impossible, but he remembered every second of it.
"Finish the meal. You will have time to think on it all after." Kaird said.
When he had neared the end of the meal, Bergar handed him one of the two dishes left and said, "Here. Eat this one first. Trust me. I have been saving this other for you. I think you will need it after this one."
"Alright," Jaxius said and slid the plate in front of him. This plate looked disgusting compared to the rest of the meal. It was covered in a thick, black pudding with bits of some strange stewed meat scattered through it.
"It's best you don't stop once you start," Kaird said.
Jaxius spooned some into his mouth and winced. The taste was bitter, an unwelcome flavor after such a grand meal. Jaxius soon realized why this dish had such a foul flavor. This plate held every bad memory, every sad moment of his previous life. In this plate was explained all of his nightmares from the past several months. He saw the women and the children who had died because of him. He saw the wife that he had left on his final march to war with the humans. He saw the sorcerer who had finally killed him, the face from his dreams. And finally, the connection was made for him. The face from the mirror. Everything had pulled him to this point. There was no denying the memories now. His past. His ancient past had come back to haunt him.
Jaxius quickly gulped the rest of the sour memories down and eagerly greeted the new plate, which was the brightest of all. Taking one bite, his eyes widened at the explosion of flavor in his mouth. It was almost too sweet to eat, especially after the bitter thickness of his previous plate. Sweet like raw sugar spread over fresh berries floating in a bowl of honey. His jaw threatened to lock. He continued on, knowing that some important bit of knowledge would be imparted with every sticky, sweet bite.
The memories brought on by the sour plate had instilled Jaxius with fear and sadness, but all that was washed away by the gentle hands of first his mother, then his wife, and finally his children. He remembered staring for days into his wife's bright blue eyes. Those eyes that could fill his heart to bursting with both love and courage. She was the reason for every noble action in his life. He remembered that it was for her that he created the elves. And eventually, it was for her that he stood to defend them in his final battle.
The amounts of raw emotion in the last two dishes of memories overtook Jaxius. Unable to stop the flood of tears, Jaxius wept.
As he wept, the world around them crumbled. The table at which he sat disintegrated. Then Bergar melted away into dust much as the old mystic had that last time in his tent in Nordras. Finally, through tears, Jaxius watch Kaird dissolve away for a second and final time.
And then Jaxius sat alone on his throne, his wild green hair flowing in the heavy winds that swept across the plain. Soon there was Jaxius, his eyes aglow and his cape fluttering in the green black winds of the ruins of the Faemoch. The bright emerald fires of his anger spread. Their flames consumed everything. Then there was nothing.
Chapter Thirty-two
The snow had long melted from the hill on which Tolian was being held prisoner. Only hours had passed, but the flames that his demon tormentors used had not only melted the snow beneath his bare feet but scorched the ground as well. Two purple-skinned monsters held his arms as a third one beat, burned, and scratched him. His whole world was a red and black swirl. Every punch and backhanded slap from the demon caused his entire body to feel on fire.
"Where is he?" the beast growled. Its voice shook Tolian from his stupor.
"Who are we talking about again?" Tolian asked. Of course, he knew, but he had to find some weakness to exploit in his demon captors. As the demon spoke to him again, he could not help but tune out the thing, instead focusing on the throng of fiends below the hill that scurried back and forth doing, as best Tolian could tell, really nothing at all.
"Are you listening? Human thing?" Tolian's silence angered the monster.
"Me? Oh, sorry not really. I'm a bit frazzled at the moment." The flippant tone made an even greater impact on the demon's temper.
"Where is your elf friend? The one that you travel with?" the demon asked again. The sound of frustration grew in its voice.
"Oh, him. I never really know with him," Tolian said. He was not sure how much longer he could stay conscious, much less how long he could hold out and not give his friend away.
The demon dug a clawed finger into Tolian's side, feeling for the appropriate nerve. The demon had a surgical precision with its claws. It found the right nerve just beneath Tolian's bruised ribcage and clamped onto it. Tolian's legs shot out, and his body bucked wildly. Fire swept up and down his insides.
"Certainly you know more than that," the demon insisted. "Perhaps, I should seek out a more thorough torture. Maybe then you will remember where your friend would disappear to so abruptly."
The beast dug even deeper. Tolian felt his back pop and crack as the demon began to twist and wrench on his body. A scream issued from Tolian that he was sure could be heard at Werlgart itself.
"No more. No more. I will tell you where he is," Tolian pleaded for cessation.
The pain lessened briefly.
"He is..." Tolian gasped for air. "Not here."
The beast slapped him across the face with a bloody hand. The bard's consciousness became fleeting, flickering in and out.
There's no way I can possibly keep this up, he thought. His body shuddered and he gave away again to the welcomed blackness.
I am here, Tolian thought he heard Jaxius say. Just rest now my friend and we will get through this.
Tolian thanked the gods Jaxius found him.
Actually, I'm not Jaxius, the voice said. The voice, in fact, did not belong to the half-elf. Rather, it was his young barbarian friend.
&nb
sp; But how are you back, Tolian asked.
We finished what we had set out to do. So now, I am back with you.
Oh, I see. Well, I am terribly sorry to inform you, but these demons intend to kill me, I am almost certain. So this is an odd predicament for you to be returning to, friend.
Hmm, Bergar said. I was gone for quite some time. I know not long passed for you, but where I was nearly a lifetime has passed. But a lifetime could not force me to forget the tortures I suffered at the hands of the witch Fylzia. Let me take over the body, I can take it and perhaps together we can find a way out of this. Aside from that, Jaxius may be coming along soon. And I pity anyone in his path.
What do you mean? Tolian asked.
All in due time my friend. All in due time.
Fine. But we don't really know how this swapping places thing works. Remember? Desperation clouded Tolian's thoughts.
Actually, I think I might have that figured out. Anger.
That makes sense now that you say it. I was very angry with you when I took over, and you were very angry with your tribesmen when you took over. Tolian paused. Oh no. I think I am regaining consciousness.
Tolian slowly cracked his eyes and the red light of the demon fires filled his vision. Before he could open his mouth to speak, he felt the familiar feeling of slipping backward in his body. He tried to turn his head but found that he no longer had control.
Why did you do that?
Let me handle this. I can take it. Bergar insisted gently to his suffering friend.
"Do your worst, demon. When I break free, I will kill you slowly," Bergar said.
The creature sneered, and Bergar noted every subtle aspect of the thing's appearance as the beast flooded his world with pain.
Chapter Thirty-three
Daylight came. Its hazy light brought no relief from the brutal beating for Bergar. He could not really enjoy the daylight, anyway, since both of his eyes were nearly swollen shut.
"Where is he?" the monster asked.
Flames of Awakening: Faemoch Cycle Book 1 Page 14