‘I’m sure whatever date works for you will be fine, my lord,’ Catherine said, unusually meek.
Valbourg heard his father grunt and watched him cross the room to tug the bell pull. Moments later, a servant appeared. ‘Take Miss Jones and Master Thomas to the kitchen and have Cook give them some refreshments,’ Alderbury said. ‘Perhaps some chocolate for the boy.’
‘Chocolate?’ Thomas gazed at the marquess with an expression close to worship. ‘I’ve never had chocolate before.’
‘Then it’s high time you did,’ Alderbury said. He nodded at the servant, who quickly came forward and escorted the little boy out. Catherine, after a worried glance in Valbourg’s direction, followed, leaving father and son alone.
‘What on earth do you think you’re doing, Richard?’ his father demanded. ‘It is bad enough you have been seen keeping company with an actress and her bastard child. Did you have to make matters worse by bringing them here?’
Valbourg wasn’t surprised by his father’s outburst, nor that he had called Thomas a bastard. Alderbury might be many things, but a fool wasn’t one of them. ‘I brought them here because they may be in need of your help. Catherine believes—’
‘Catherine?’ his father snapped. ‘When did you and the lady become so intimately acquainted?’
‘We are not, but neither is our friendship one that demands a rigid degree of formality,’ Valbourg replied calmly. ‘Now, if you will allow me to go on...?’
Alderbury grunted again. ‘Very well, but be quick about it.’
‘The boy and his mother were separated at birth. Thomas has been living with his paternal grandfather and his new wife in the country while Catherine has been here in London making a career for herself. She did so in order to make a life for her and her son, and now that they are together again, Catherine is hopeful of keeping Thomas with her. However, I have reason to believe the boy’s grandfather may try to take him away from her.’
‘Why? If she is the boy’s mother—’
‘She is, but the boy isn’t aware of it.’ With that, Valbourg gave his father a brief summation of the situation and his concerns regarding Thomas’s safety.
‘You’re not seriously suggesting the boy stay here with me?’ Alderbury said at the conclusion of the tale.
‘Only until he has been made aware of the fact that Catherine is his mother and that, if necessary, the proper officials have been alerted.’
‘You take a great deal upon yourself, Richard,’ Alderbury said. ‘You assured me there was nothing going on between you and Miss Jones.’
‘There is not, other than a sincere admiration for what she has been able to accomplish and a genuine respect for the lady herself. Yes, she made a mistake, but she has done everything since that time to prove herself worthy of being Thomas’s mother. She has refused countless offers from men wishing to set her up as their mistress and has saved enough money to provide a decent lifestyle for herself and her son.’
‘And what of your affection for her?’ Alderbury enquired. ‘And don’t try to tell me you have none. I’m not blind. I saw the way you looked at her.’
Valbourg inclined his head, but took his time answering. ‘Whatever I feel for Catherine has no bearing on this conversation. I am well aware of the differences between us and of what I stand to lose were I to involve her in my life. In any capacity.’
Again, his father grunted. ‘Thank you for being honest with me. I would not be pleased to know you were contemplating any kind of association with Miss Jones, Richard. She is a beautiful woman and I agree she is both talented and refined, but you are my son and must bear the responsibilities of being my heir. She could never be a suitable wife for you nor an acceptable mother to your children. However, I can sympathise with her plight. A child should be with his mother. The Haileys have no right to try to take the boy back or to keep him against his will. So, until the situation is resolved, I will allow him to stay here, provided I am not expected to entertain him or his mother when she calls.’
It was more than Valbourg had expected. ‘You will allow Catherine to visit him?’
‘Damn it, Richard, I’m not heartless. Miss Jones has obviously gone to a great deal of trouble to get her son back; I cannot imagine she would be pleased at not being able to see him now. Yes, she may visit, but I have a condition of my own to make.’
‘Name it.’
‘You are to announce your engagement by Christmas.’
‘My engagement? To whom?’
‘Whomever you choose within our social circle. It is time you were married. Past time, in fact. I find I agree with Dorothy in this matter,’ Alderbury said. ‘You are over thirty and raising a young boy as though he were your own. You need a wife and Sebastian needs a mother.’
‘We are doing fine as we are.’
‘In your eyes, perhaps, but not in mine. The condition stands. Miss Jones’s son may stay here and she may come to visit him as often as she likes. But you must make a concerted effort to find a wife by Christmas. I know of several who would be only too happy to receive your proposal.’
But none of them was Catherine, Valbourg reflected. And in that moment, with his father’s ultimatum hanging over his head, the knowledge that he was in love with Catherine hit him with blinding and irrefutable force. The feeling had crept up on him, happening almost without his knowledge until now he could think of nothing else.
He was in love with her. He felt it every moment they were together. He woke up thinking about her. Went to sleep with her name on his lips. He lived for the hours they could be together and merely existed during the times they were apart. His desire to have Thomas staying at his house or his father’s was merely a way of assuring her constant proximity. Of course he had the boy’s welfare at heart, but it was Catherine’s company he truly craved. He would have done anything to secure that.
But now, in order to guarantee her son’s safety, he had to make a promise to forget her. To find another woman with whom to spend his life, even though he knew there would never be another for whom he felt this kind of deep and abiding love. He was caught between two evils: doing what was right for his family, or flying in the face of their disapproval and doing what was right for him.
Valbourg closed his eyes and felt resignation seep into his soul. ‘Very well, I shall present my choice to you before Christmas. In return, you will keep Thomas safe until we can be certain that Catherine is in a position to do so.’
‘Agreed.’ Alderbury held out his hand. ‘You’re doing the right thing, Val. There really wasn’t any other choice.’
After a moment’s hesitation, Valbourg took his father’s hand, shook it once and let it go. ‘There is always a choice, Father. I would simply have preferred you not to be the one to force me into making this one.’
* * *
Thomas settled into Alderbury House surprisingly well and soon became a favourite with the entire household. Cook took to making treats for him; sweet pastries and puddings unlike any the boy had ever tasted, and the maids took turn playing games with him in between cleaning the rooms.
Sebastian, of course, was his constant companion and even Lord Alderbury seemed to enjoy having him in the house. On one occasion, Catherine arrived to find her son sitting at the piano in the music room while Alderbury sat in a chair close by. It was not the marquess’s presence that caused Catherine to stare at the scene in amazement, but her son’s unexpected and undeniable talent. It was a simple étude, yet Thomas played it without a single mistake.
She waited until the piece came to an end before walking into the room. ‘Well done, Thomas. I had no idea you could play the piano so well. Has someone been teaching you?’
The little boy shook his head. ‘No. Sometimes I played Aunt Eliza’s pianoforte, but only when Reverend Hailey wasn’t around.’
‘The boy’s gifted,
’ Alderbury said bluntly. ‘There’s no other explanation for it. He must take after you—’
‘Shall we go and see if there are any Eccles cakes, Thomas?’ Catherine said quickly. It was the first time Alderbury had offered her more than a grunt, but intimating that Thomas had inherited any kind of trait or talent from her was bound to be confusing for the boy. ‘I remember Betsy saying Cook was going to bake some this morning.’
‘Oh, yes, please. I love Eccles cakes!’ Thomas said, scrambling down from the bench. ‘Not as much as I love chocolate, but almost.’
‘Why don’t you run along to the kitchen, Thomas?’ Alderbury said. ‘You know the way. Your...that is, Miss Jones will be along in a moment.’
‘All right,’ Thomas said and ran out of the room. ‘But don’t be long, Miss Jones!’
‘I won’t,’ Catherine said, then turned back to find Valbourg’s father watching her. ‘You wish to speak to me, my lord?’
‘I do.’ He put his hands behind his back and rocked back and forth on his heels. ‘When are you going to tell him the truth about your relationship?’
Surprised a man like Alderbury would care, Catherine crossed her arms over her chest. ‘Soon. I’ve been waiting for the right moment.’
‘There isn’t going to be a right moment. Do it now, before someone says something accidentally, the way I almost did,’ Alderbury said. ‘It will come as a shock, but it’s better he hear it from you. He must be wondering why you’re not taking him back to the country.’
In fact, Thomas had asked her that question again last night after she had read him a story and kissed him goodnight. It caught her off guard because it had been a few days since he had mentioned the Haileys or going home. She knew he missed Megan because it was she rather than Reverend Hailey or Eliza whom he talked about, but Catherine also knew it was wishful thinking to expect him to forget they existed. As much as the bond between them was growing stronger, Thomas still clung to what he knew best.
‘You’re right. Thomas does need to know,’ Catherine said. ‘I’ve just been afraid of how he might react.’
‘Miss Jones, I don’t know a great deal about you, but one thing I have been able to glean from my son’s recounting is that you are a brave and resourceful young woman,’ Alderbury said. ‘You can do this and you must do it. For your sake and the boy’s. Now off you go and get some chocolate,’ he said grudgingly. ‘It would do you good to put some weight on.’
Catherine left the room with a smile on her lips. It was the closest Valbourg’s father had ever come to saying he liked her.
* * *
Catherine had planned on taking Thomas to the park to feed the ducks, but when the clouds rolled in and a steady rain began to fall, she decided to take him back to Green Street and there, in the quiet surroundings of her home, to tell him the truth about his birth. She knew he felt at ease in her company now. He laughed more than he had in the past and was constantly looking to her for guidance. Catherine hoped the news they were related would make him as happy as it did her.
Mrs Rankin was delighted to see him, of course. She vowed he had grown an inch since he had last been in the house, which made Thomas giggle and ask to be measured. She dutifully stood him against the wall and performed the task, and though the forecasted inch didn’t materialise, she did assure him that he was definitely an eighth of an inch taller than he had been two days earlier.
* * *
The three of them had passed a delightful afternoon. Mrs Rankin had played games with him while Catherine made a list of everything that needed to be done. Then, as soon as dinner was out of the way, she took him into the drawing room and sat him down beside her on the dark-green chesterfield. ‘Thomas, there’s something I need to tell you,’ she began. ‘Something I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time.’
Thomas looked up at her and smiled. ‘Is it something good?’
‘I think so, but you must tell me how you feel about it, too. It has to do with your real mother and father.’
His eyes went wide. ‘Do you know who they are?’
‘Yes. Sadly, your father died before you were born, but you do have a mother and I am very, very happy to tell you that, contrary to what Reverend Hailey has led you to believe, she is alive and well.’ Catherine stopped and took a deep breath, praying she was doing the right thing. ‘What would you say if I told you...I was your mother?’
She thought for a moment her heart might explode. Thomas looked at her, his mouth forming a silent ‘O’, his blue eyes opening wide. ‘You’re my mother?’
‘Yes.’
‘Truly?’
‘Truly.’
‘But...why didn’t you tell me?’
‘Because your aunt thought it would be less confusing for you to think of me as a friend,’ Catherine said, knowing the lie had nothing to do with Thomas and everything to do with Eliza. ‘And she thought you might wish to stay with me rather than them and they didn’t want that to happen.’
‘But you’re my mother,’ Thomas said, his forehead furrowing. ‘I would rather have been with you.’
There was nothing he could have said that would have made Catherine happier. ‘And I wanted you with me so very much, my darling boy. It was very hard seeing you only twice a year, but that was all I was allowed.’
‘Why do I live with Reverend Hailey and Aunt Eliza?’ Thomas asked. ‘Didn’t you want me?’
‘Of course I wanted you, but when you were born, Reverend Hailey thought I wasn’t able to look after you, so he said he would take care of you until I could. But we’re together now and I don’t want us ever to be apart again. But you must tell me if that’s what you want, too.’
‘I do, very much,’ Thomas said. ‘But won’t Reverend Hailey and Aunt Eliza be angry?’
‘I suspect so. They love you and won’t be happy at the thought of you coming to live with me,’ Catherine said, not wishing to turn the boy against them. ‘But I am your mother and they knew that all along.’
‘What about Megan? Will I ever see her again?’
‘Of course you will, though perhaps not right away. We’ll need to let Reverend Hailey and your aunt come to terms with what’s happened and that may take a little while. But I’ll make sure you don’t lose touch with Megan. She can come here and stay with us,’ Catherine said. ‘Do you think she would like that?’
‘More than anything!’ Thomas said, brightening.
‘Then she shall. She could go to the park and feed the ducks with you.’
‘I think she would rather go to the shops.’
‘Then we shall visit the shops and then go to the park,’ Catherine said, suddenly feeling as though anything were possible. ‘Whatever makes you happy, dearest.’
Thomas sat quietly for a moment, chewing on his bottom lip. Then, looking up at her, he said, ‘You said my father died. Do you know who he was and what happened to him?’
The question was inevitable and Catherine felt it only fair that she be as honest with Thomas as possible. ‘Your father was Megan’s brother, Will. He died before you were born. He went out riding one day and took a bad fall from his horse.’
Thomas’s brow furrowed. ‘My father was Megan’s brother?’
‘Yes, which means Reverend Hailey is actually your grandfather.’
Thomas looked startled. ‘But why doesn’t Rev...that is, Grandfather ever talk about him? Doesn’t he miss him?’
‘I’m sure he does, but I think it hurts him too much to talk about it,’ Catherine said gently. ‘The important thing is that you know I’m your mother and that I love you very much. And it would make me very happy if you said you would like to stay here in London with me.’
‘I would like that, Miss...Mama,’ Thomas said, shyly. ‘But will you write to Megan and tell her why I’m not coming back?’
Cathe
rine nodded, suddenly feeling tears well up in her eyes. ‘I will do anything you want, my darling boy. Anything to make you happy.’ She drew him into her arms and hugged him. ‘I have waited five long years to make you mine again, and now that I have, no one is ever going to take you away from me again.’
Chapter Ten
After a long and eventful day, Catherine took Thomas back to Alderbury House, feeling happier than she had in years. The dreaded secret had been revealed and not only was Thomas accepting of her new role in his life, but he had also expressed himself delighted. She couldn’t wait to tell Alderbury she had met his challenge!
Unfortunately, the marquess had gone out to an evening engagement, so Catherine took supper with Thomas in the nursery before taking him up to his bed and tucking him in. She started reading him a story and, though he proclaimed he wasn’t at all sleepy, it didn’t take long for him to fall asleep.
Catherine didn’t mind. It had been an emotional day and she was looking forward to getting home and crawling into her own bed. But as the carriage made its way back to Green Street, it was not Thomas she found herself thinking about, but Valbourg, and how much closer they had become since their return to London. Though they had not been intimate and likely never would be, there was an ease between them now that hadn’t been there before.
Perhaps her life really was changing for the better, Catherine mused. If she could keep Thomas with her and maintain her career on the stage, she would have everything she wanted.
Except Valbourg. He could never be a part of her life. No doubt he would eventually marry and start a family of his own with someone of whom his father approved. A mistress was not part of that scenario because Valbourg had to abide by society’s—and his sister’s—rules about what did and did not constitute a respectable family man’s behaviour.
Still, Catherine resolved to content herself with whatever time she was able to spend with him and to ask for no more than that. She would devote herself to raising Thomas and to furthering her career. Those were the two most important considerations in her life.
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