Add that to the growing list of reasons to stay clear of Noah. She liked being in control of her emotions. Mostly. Sometimes the pressure of always being stable, friendly and ready to lend a helping hand was too much. She’d chosen this, as clearly as she’d decided to take the bike trail back to her house. Straying from her path now would be very messy. And Katie wasn’t one for mess.
Chapter Seven
Noah spent two nights at the hospital with his mother before she finally sent him away.
“I love you, Noah,” Meg said from where she was propped up against several pillows, flipping through a gardening magazine. “But you’re making me nervous with all that pacing.” As was her habit at home, she woke early in the hospital. Much of the normal color had returned to her face and they’d removed the bandage from her head. The angry red of the scar from her surgery was beginning to fade to a lighter pink color already.
“I’m not pacing,” he countered and forced himself to stop moving back and forth across her small room.
“And you smell,” she added, folding back the page of an article she wanted to keep. One of his trivial but vivid memories from childhood was the stack of magazines always piled in the corner of his mother’s bedroom, all with folded pages she’d never look at again. She’d saved them for years, from magazines she looked at during road trips and throughout the endless hours she spent on the sidelines of the various sports he played as a kid. The morning after his father’s funeral, she’d emptied out her entire bedroom, packing up his dad’s clothes to donate and loading stack after stack of magazines into the back of the pickup truck to be recycled. He remembered watching in numb silence, too swept up in his own sorrow to either stop her or offer to help.
It was odd to watch her with a magazine again.
He started to argue about his need for a shower then lifted his T-shirt and took a whiff. She was right. “I’ll drive up to the farm, shower and come back. Tater is fine out at Crimson Ranch, but I don’t want you to be alone here for too long.”
“That’s at least five hours round-trip. It’s too much. Emily texted a few minutes ago. She and Davey are on their way. She got a hotel room in Denver for the night.” His mother let the magazine fall to her chest and sighed. “I’m worried about her, Noah.”
“She’s fine,” he answered, although he didn’t believe that was true. “You need to focus on yourself.”
Meg waved away his concern. “All the scans are clear. The doctor is happy with my progress. I’m going to be discharged in a few days. There will be plenty of time for your hovering once I’m back home.”
“I’m not hovering.” Except he was. Hovering and pacing. He couldn’t seem to stop himself.
“I’m not going to die, Noah.” His mother flashed a wry smile. “Not yet, anyway.”
“Don’t joke about that,” he snapped automatically then forced himself to take a breath. “I’m sorry. I know you’re going to be fine. You have to be fine.”
“I think you’re avoiding going back to Crimson.”
He laughed, although it sounded hollow to his own ears. “That’s crazy. I just don’t want to leave you.”
“Emily told me about the kiss.”
“Emily should worry about her own problems.”
“A minute ago you said she was fine.”
He scrubbed a hand over his face. “If it means we don’t have to talk about me, I’ve changed my mind.”
“Katie is a good friend,” his mother said, unwilling to be distracted. “She cares for you.”
“But I’m too messed up to deserve her,” he interrupted.
“I didn’t say that.”
“You’re thinking it.” He turned toward her then sank down on the edge of the hospital bed. “I’m thinking it. Everyone must be.”
“You’re my son, Noah.” She nudged his hip with her foot. “I think you deserve everything you want in life.”
“Thanks, Mom.” He shifted closer and took her hand in his, running his fingers along the hospital bracelet that circled her wrist. His mother’s hands had never been delicate. Her nails were short and rounded, the top of her palm callused from work on the farm. Maybe that was the reason women with ornately manicured nails and dainty hands always made him suspicious. Katie had strong hands, too, he realized. Still feminine, but not delicate thanks to her hours in the bakery.
“The question is, do you want Katie?”
“If you’d asked me that two weeks ago, I would have said you were crazy for even asking me. She was Tori’s best friend all through high school. I never thought of her that way. In the years since then...”
“You’re my son,” his mother repeated. “But you have horrible taste in women.”
“I haven’t brought a woman home in years.”
“No one since Tori,” she agreed.
“So how do you know anything about my taste in women?”
“It’s a small town. For that matter, it’s a small state when it comes to gossip. I still have friends in Boulder. I hear things.”
“You’ve been keeping tabs on me?”
She shrugged. “Worrying is what mothers do. Your father’s death—”
“Has nothing to do with the women I date.”
“My surgeon asked me to dinner,” she said quietly, picking up the magazine again.
“Are you kidding?” Noah shot off the bed and stalked to the edge of the room, something close to panic creeping up his throat at the thought of his mom with a man who wasn’t his father. “That’s got to be a breach of the doctor-patient relationship. I’ll file a complaint with the hospital. I’ll kick his—”
“I’d like to go out with him, Noah.”
His righteous indignation fled as quickly as it had come. “Why would you want to do that?” He tried and failed to keep his voice steady.
“It’s been more than ten years since your dad died.” Unlike his own, Meg’s voice was gentle. “He was my whole world, and for a while I wished I’d died right along with him. If it hadn’t been for you and Emily, I’m not sure I could have kept going.” She placed the magazine on the rolling cart on the far side of the bed. “But I haven’t been with a man in all this time.”
Noah grimaced. “Mom, I can’t have this conversation with you.”
“Get your mind out of the gutter,” she said with uncharacteristic impatience.
As difficult as this was for him, Noah realized it was just as hard for his mom. He owed her more than he was giving right now. This was why he was here, he reminded himself. To support her.
“I’m sorry.” He walked back to the bed, pulled up a chair and sat across from her. “You want to go on a date with the doctor? I’m okay with that. Emily will be, too.”
“Sweetie, I appreciate that, but it’s not the point. Each of us was deeply affected by losing your father. I’ve spent too many years with a ghost as my only company. Emily just wanted to get away however she could. And you—”
“I tried, Mom.” He interrupted her before she could delve too far into his demons. That was the last thing he needed right now. “I was going to ask Tori to marry me. I wanted to be with her forever.” He shrugged, rubbed his hands along his thighs. “Before she cheated on me, that is. Maybe my reluctance to get into another serious relationship has more to do with finding my girlfriend with her naked legs wrapped—” He stopped, stood again. “I can’t have this conversation, either.”
Meg laughed. “I may be your mother, but I’m a grown woman. I know what teenage couples do in the back of a car.”
He turned, narrowed his eyes. “How did you know I found them in the back of a car?”
“Small town,” she repeated. “Don’t let your father’s death or what happened with Tori stop you from believing in love or your capacity for it.”
“I think my tra
ck record speaks for itself.”
She sighed. “I can’t stop you from believing the worst about yourself. But it’s not how I see you. I don’t think it’s how Katie sees you, either.”
“She should. I haven’t done right by her.”
“You can’t change the past.” His mother leaned back against the pillow, closed her eyes. “But you can choose how to move forward.”
He thought about that for a moment then leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “Have you always been this smart?”
“Yes.” She cracked open one eye. “Take a shower, Noah. Take Tater for a hike. Talk to Katie. I’ll be fine here and I’ll call if I need anything.”
“I’ll come back—”
“Tomorrow,” she finished for him.
“Tomorrow,” he agreed. “I love you, Mom.”
“You too, sweetie.”
He walked to the door then looked over his shoulder. “And your new Dr. Love better treat you right. I meant what I said about kicking his butt otherwise.”
With his mother’s smile in his mind, he walked out of the hospital to head toward the mountains.
* * *
“Have dinner with me?”
Katie whirled around from where she was stapling a flyer for the Founder’s Day Festival onto the community bulletin board outside the bakery.
Noah crossed his hands in front of his face and ducked. “Maybe you want to put down the weapon before you answer.”
She lowered the arm that held the staple gun. “How’s your mom?” she asked, ignoring his question.
Some of the stress had eased from his face. In fact, he looked much better than he had when she’d last seen him in the hospital. Almost perfect, damn him. He wore his Forest Service uniform, and the gray button-down shirt stretched across his muscled chest while the olive-colored pants fit his long, toned legs perfectly. Okay, she needed to not think about his body. At all.
“She’s good,” he answered, one side of his mouth kicking up as if he could read her mind’s wayward thoughts. “Healing up nicely and itching to be out of the hospital and back home. She’s due to be released on Friday.”
“You’ve been staying at the hospital?”
He gave a quick nod. “She finally got sick of me and sent me home. I need to get caught up on some paperwork at the office and thought I’d pick up a dozen cookies to take in with me.”
“Lelia’s working the counter,” Katie told him. “She can help you. I want to hand out a few more flyers along Main Street.”
“Mind if I keep you company?”
Mind if I plaster myself across your body?
“Sure.” She handed him half the stack of papers in her hand. “You take this side of the street. I’ll do the other and meet you on the corner.”
Before he could argue, she dashed across the street, narrowly avoiding being hit by a minivan with Kansas license plates pulling out of a parking space. She heard Noah shout her name but didn’t look back, ducking into the outdoor-equipment store in the middle of the block. She made a few minutes of small talk with the shop’s owner then proceeded to the next storefront. She took her time, part of her hoping Noah would give out all of his flyers and leave for the Forest Service headquarters near the edge of town.
Instead he was waiting for her at the corner, leaning back against a light post with his head tilted up to the sun. He wore his usual wraparound sunglasses and the ends of his golden hair curled at the nape of his neck. How long would she have to tell herself she’d got over him before her body believed it was true?
“Getting hit by a car is a little extreme as a way to avoid talking to me,” he said as she approached.
“I didn’t plan that part of it,” she answered, taking the remaining flyers he handed to her. His finger brushed her wrist and she pulled back, sucking in a breath. This had to stop or he was going to drive her crazy. “What do you want, Noah?”
“You didn’t answer my question about dinner.” He smiled at her, a grin she recognized from years of experience. It was the devil-may-care smile he gave to women in bars, at parties or in general as he easily charmed his way into their hearts and beds. It wasn’t going to work on Katie, even if her toes curled in automatic response to it.
“No.”
She moved around him, looked both ways on the street and stepped off the curb.
It was only seconds before he caught up with her. “You don’t mean that.”
“I do.”
“You can’t.”
“And why is that?” she asked, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye.
He was staring at her and wiggled his brows. “Because you want me.”
“Wow.” She shook her head, almost tripped over her own two feet. “Your ego never fails to astound.”
“I want you even more.” He leaned closer, his breath tickling the hair that had fallen out of her long braid. “It was too good between us. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. The way you touched me...the sounds you made when I—”
“Stop!” She turned and pushed him away, hating the way her body had caught fire at his words. “I can’t do this anymore.” She crushed the flyers to her chest, as if she could ease the panic in her heart.
“So what if I want you?” She poked at his chest with one finger. “Every woman you’ve ever been with—and don’t forget I know many of them—still wants you. You’ve got skills.” Her eyes narrowed as she glared at him. “Unfair, maddening skills. But you’re...you’re...a man-boy.”
“Man-boy?” His body went rigid. “What the hell does that mean?”
“We’ve been over this. You want a good time. I want a future. I’m not going to deny that I’m attracted to you. Eighty-year-old women and babies are attracted to you. But I want more. The only way I’m going to get it is to move on. How am I supposed to do that if I hop back into bed with you?”
“I asked you to dinner, Katie. A date. I’m not looking for friends with benefits. I could find that anywhere.”
She gasped, and he cringed in response. He ran one hand through his hair, blew out a breath. “Let’s start over. I’m messing this up and that wasn’t part of my plan.” He took off his sunglasses and the intensity of his piercing blue eyes captured her. She couldn’t have moved if she’d wanted to. “Would you please have dinner with me, Katie Garrity? A real date.” He smiled, but this time it was hesitant and a little hopeful.
The catch in her heart made her sure of her answer. “No,” she whispered.
Noah’s head snapped back as if she’d struck him. She expected him to stalk away. Noah liked his women agreeable and easy. And Katie wanted to be, not just because of her feelings for him but because she liked making people happy. She was agreeable to a fault, but somewhere inside, her instinct for self-preservation wouldn’t allow her to succumb to Noah’s charms. She’d promised herself she was moving on, and that was what she was going to do.
But he didn’t move. He didn’t speak, just continued to stare at her as if she was a puzzle he wanted to solve.
“I’m going out with Matt again,” she offered into the silence. Katie hated awkward silences. “You and I are friends, Noah. That’s how it’s been for years and it’s worked just fine.”
“Has it?” He reached out and rubbed a loose strand of her hair between two fingers. She shivered. “I’m not sure—”
“Well, isn’t this cozy,” a voice said from behind Noah.
His hand dropped at the same time Katie felt her stomach pitch and roll.
He flipped his sunglasses down before turning away from her. “Hey, Tori,” he said to the woman glaring at the two of them. “Welcome back to Crimson.”
* * *
Noah wanted to see his ex-girlfriend at this moment like he wanted to be stuck on the side of a m
ountain in a lightning storm.
The analogy seemed to fit as he could almost feel the tension radiating between the two women. He didn’t understand that at all. Katie had been Tori’s shadow and best friend throughout high school. Yes, she’d taken his side in the breakup. But since he’d caught Tori in the act with one of his football buddies, Noah wasn’t sure how she could fault Katie for not being more sympathetic. As far as he knew, the two hadn’t spoken in all these years.
Now he wished he would have questioned that more. Hell, there was a lot more he wished he’d paid attention to over the years. Katie had just always been there, consistent like the sun rising, and he’d never thought about the possibility of that changing. Or how he’d feel if she wasn’t a part of his life.
He wasn’t going to give up on her, even if he knew he should. His mom was right—Noah may have not done his best in life up until now, but there was no better time to change his future. Of course, he needed to convince Katie of that before it was too late. He’d seen the way Matt Davis had looked at her the night of their date. But as far as Noah was concerned, Katie was his and always would be.
“How long are you in town?” Katie asked, her voice shaky. Noah saw her dart a glance between Tori and him. She couldn’t possibly think he still had feelings for his old girlfriend.
“At least a month,” Tori answered, bitterness blazing in her eyes as she glared at Katie. Noah had to resist the urge to step between the two of them. If memory served, Tori could be vicious when she wanted to. “I’m redesigning a residence in Aspen. My client is wealthy enough to want me on-site for the whole project. I’m visiting my parents while I’m here.” She leaned forward and placed a hand on Noah’s arm. “I’ve been thinking about both your mother and you. There are so many reminders of our time together here.”
As Katie let out a snort, Tori’s eyes narrowed further. “Let’s grab a drink sometime while we’re both in town. There’s so much I’d like to explain to you about that night, Noah. Details you’ve never heard.”
A Baby and a Betrothal Page 7