Aileen Aroon, A Memoir

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by William Osborn Stoddard

stuffing; but even then they were not satisfied, and madeseveral ineffectual attempts to swallow my finger as well. At length--and how happy I felt!--they could both feed themselves and fly. Thislast accomplishment, however, was anything but agreeable to me, for nosooner did I open their door than out they would all come, one after theother, and seat themselves on my head and shoulders, each one trying tomake more noise than all the rest and outdo his brothers in din.

  I got so tired of this sort of thing at last, that one day I determinedto set them all at liberty. I accordingly hung their cage outside thewindow and opened their door, and out they all flew, but back they cameinto the room again, and settled on me as usual. "Then," said I, "I'mgoing gardening." By the way they clung to me it was evident theiranswer was: "And so are we." And so they did. And as soon as Icommenced operations with the spade they commenced operations too, bysearching for and eating every worm I turned up, evidently thinking Iwas merely working for their benefit and pleasure. I got tired of this."O bother you all!" I cried; "I'm sick of you." I threw down my spadein disgust; and before they could divine my intention, I had leaped thefence and disappeared in the plantation beyond.

  "Now," said I to myself, as I entered the garden that evening after myreturn, and could see no signs of starlings, "I'm rid of you plagues atlast;" and I smiled with satisfaction. It was short-lived, for just atthat moment "Skraigh, skraigh, skraigh" sounded from the treesadjoining; and before I could turn foot, my tormentors, seemingly madwith joy, were all sitting on me as usual. Two of them died about aweek after this; and the others, being cock and hen, I resolved to keep.

  Both Dick and his wife soon grew to be very fine birds. I procured thema large roomy cage, with plenty of sand and a layer of straw in thebottom of it, a dish or two, a bath, a drinking fountain, and always asupply of fresh green weeds on the roof of their domicile. Besidestheir usual food of soaked bread, etc, they had slugs occasionally, andflies, and earthworms. Once a day the cage-door was thrown open, andout they both would fly with joyful "skraigh" to enjoy the luxury of abath on the kitchen floor. One would have imagined that, being onlytwo, they would not have stood on the order of their going; but theydid, at least Dick did, for he insisted upon using the bath first, andhis wife had to wait patiently until his lordship had finished. Thiswas part of Dick's domestic discipline. When they were both thoroughlywet and draggled, and everything within a radius of two yards was in thesame condition, their next move was to hop on to the fender, and flatterand gaze pensively into the fire; and two more melancholy-looking,ragged wretches you never saw. When they began to dry, then they beganto dress, and in a few minutes "Richard was himself again," and so washis wife.

  Starlings have their own natural song, and a strange noise they maketoo. Their great faculty, however, is the gift of imitation, which theyhave in a wonderful degree of perfection. The first thing that Dicklearned to imitate was the rumbling of carts and carriages on thestreet, and very proud he was of the accomplishment. Then he learned topronounce his own name, with the prefix "Pretty," which he neveromitted, and to which he was justly entitled. Except when sitting ontheir perch singing or piping, these two little pets were never tiredengineering about their cage, and everything was minutely examined.They were perfect adepts at boring holes; by inserting the bill closed,and opening it like a pair of scissors, lo! the thing was done. Dick'srule of conduct was that he himself should have the first of everything,and be allowed to examine first into everything, to have the highestperch and all the tit-bits; in a word, to rule, king and priest, in hisown cage. I don't suppose he hated his wife, but he kept her in a stateof inglorious subjection to his royal will and pleasure. "Hezekiah" wasthe name he gave his wife. I don't know why, but I am sure no onetaught him this, for he first used the name himself, and then I merelycorrected his pronunciation.

  Sometimes Dick would sit himself down to sing a song; and presently hiswife would join in with a few simple notes of melody; upon which Dickwould stop singing instantly, and look round at her with indignation."Hezekiah! Hezekiah!" he would say, which being interpreted, clearlymeant: "Hezekiah, my dear, how can you so far forget yourself as topresume to interrupt your lord and master, with that cracked andquavering voice of yours?" Then he would commence anew; and Hezekiahbeing so good-natured, would soon forget her scolding and again join in.This was too much for Dick's temper; and Hezekiah was accordinglychased round and round the cage and soundly thrashed. His conductaltogether as a husband, I am sorry to say, was very far fromsatisfactory. I have said he always retained the highest perch forhimself; but sometimes he would turn one eye downwards, and seeingHezekiah sitting so cosily and contentedly on her humble perch, would atonce conclude that her seat was more comfortable than his; so down hewould hop and send her off at once.

  It was Dick's orders that Hezekiah should only eat at meal-times; thatmeant at all times when he chose to feed, _after he was done_. But Isuppose his poor wife was often a little hungry in the interim, for shewould watch till she got Dick fairly into the middle of a song and quiteoblivions of surrounding circumstances, then she would hop down andsnatch a meal on the sly. But dire was the punishment far the deceit ifDick found her out. Sometimes I think she used to long for a littlelove and affection, and at such times she would jump up on the perchbeside her husband, and with a fond cry sidle close to him.

  "Hezekiah! Hezekiah!" he would exclaim; and if she didn't take thathint, she was soon knocked to the bottom of the cage. In fact, Dick wasa domestic tyrant, but in all other respects a dear affectionate littlepet.

  One morning Dick got out of his cage by undoing the fastening, and flewthrough the open window, determined to see what the world was like,leaving Hezekiah to mourn. It was before five on a summer's morningthat he escaped; and I saw no more of him until, coming out of churchthat day, the people were greatly astonished to see a bird fly down fromthe steeple and alight upon my shoulder. He retained his perch all theway home. He got so well up to opening the fastening of his cage-doorthat I had to get a small spring padlock, which defied him, although hestudied it for months, and finally gave it up, as being one of thosethings which no fellow could understand.

  Dick soon began to talk, and before long had quite a large vocabulary ofwords, which he was never tired using. As he grew very tame, he wasallowed to live either out of his cage or in it all day long as hepleased. Often he would be out in the garden all alone for hourstogether, running about catching flies, or sitting up in a treerepeating his lessons to himself, both verbal and musical. The cat andher kittens were his especial favourites, although he used to play withthe dogs as well, and often go to sleep on their backs. He took hislessons with great regularity, was an arduous student, and soon learnedto pipe "Duncan Grey" and "The Sprig of Shillelah" without a singlewrong note. I used to whistle these tunes over to him, and it was quiteamusing to mark his air of rapt attention as he crouched down to listen.When I had finished, he did not at once begin to try the tune himself,but sat quiet and still for some time, evidently thinking it over in hisown mind. In piping it, if he forgot a part of the air, he would cry:"Doctor, doctor!" and repeat the last note once or twice, as much as tosay: "What comes after that?" and I would finish the tune for him.

  "Tse! tse! tse!" was a favourite exclamation of his, indicative ofsurprise. When I played a tune on the fiddle to him, he would crouchdown with breathless attention. Sometimes when he saw me take up thefiddle, he would go at once and peck at Hezekiah. I don't know why hedid so, unless to secure her keeping quiet. As soon as I had finishedhe would say "Bravo!" with three distinct intonations of the word, thus:"Bravo! doctor; br-r-ravo! bra-vo!"

  Dick was extremely inquisitive and must see into everything. He used toannoy the cat very much by opening out her toes, or even her nostrils,to examine; and at times pussy used to lose patience, and pat him on theback.

  "Eh?" he would say. "What is it? You rascal!" If two people weretalking together underneath his cage, he would cock his head, l
engthenhis neck, and looking down quizzingly, say: "Eh? _What_ is it? _What_do you say?"

  He frequently began a sentence with the verb, "Is," putting greatemphasis on it. "Is?" he would say musingly.

  "Is what, Dick?" I would ask.

  "Is," he would repeat--"Is the darling starling a pretty pet?"

  "No question about it," I would answer.

  He certainly made the best of his vocabulary, for he trotted out all hisnouns and all his adjectives time about in pairs, and formed a hundredcurious combinations.

  "_Is_," he asked one day, "the darling doctor a rascal?"

  "Just as you think," I

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