by Lexi Lawton
“Wanna tell me why that felt like a good-bye kiss?” she whispered.
“Was it?” He raised a brow. “You tell me.”
“I don’t know. Are you planning to say good-bye?”
“Fuck no.” His tone was as ragged and harsh as his breathing. He’d take whatever she was willing to give and then shamelessly beg for more.
“Well, neither am I, so what the hell was that?” Defiance blazed in her eyes, like she was daring him to say what they both feared.
He pulled her to his chest, hugging her. “That was me being stupid and paranoid.”
“Could you give me some warning next time? I swear I just had a mini heart attack.”
He opened the car door for her. Now that he knew she wasn’t planning to send him packing, he could relax and focus on the serious conversation they needed to have instead of worrying about getting dumped. He drove the short distance to the park, and as soon as they were out of the car, he took her hand.
They followed one of the paved trails that weaved around the perimeter of the park, illuminated at night by solar-powered lights. “Can I ask you a question?” he asked.
“Of course.”
“Are you here with me right now because you want to be here or because Devon told you to give me a fighting chance?”
She stopped walking and stared at him. “You talked to Devon?”
Tanner nodded. “I ran into him after class, before I picked you up. He told me you’d talked to him about us.” A thrill raced up his spine. Us. That was too perfect not to fight for.
“I talk to Devon about a lot of things.” She started walking again. “And I suppose he’s part of the reason I’m here, but I want to be here with you, Tanner. I really do.”
Who was she trying to convince? He stopped, tugging on her hand until she was facing him. “It’s no secret I like you, Jules. A lot. And I want to get to know you. I want to take you out on dates and spend time with you. But I can’t do that if there are so many other people getting involved.”
“Are you suggesting I stop being friends with Devon?” Her eyes widened.
“No.” He shook his head. “No, absolutely not. I would never tell you who you can and can’t be friends with. Ever.” Because he knew if it came down to her making a choice between him and Devon, he’d lose. Big time. “But if we’re going to try to have a relationship, I need to know it’s you and me. Not you and me and Devon and Rebecca and whoever else decides they want to butt in.”
Her lips quivered and then curved up in a smile. “Are there other girls from your past who’re going to show up and try to butt in that I should know about?”
He laughed, deciding her teasing was a good sign. “No.” He took her other hand, caressing the backs with his thumbs. “I want to know that any decisions you make about me, about our relationship, are being made because it’s what you want, not what someone else tells you you should want.”
She closed the distance between them and placed a kiss to his cheek. “I think I can manage that.”
“Good.” Releasing his hold on one of her hands, they turned and continued walking along the trail.
“Now it’s my turn to ask you a question,” she said. “What happened between you and Rebecca today?”
His heart skipped several beats, and he fought to draw in a breath. “Nothing. I knocked on your door to get you and she opened it naked. I looked away.”
Juliana frowned. “I swear she’s always naked. But I’m talking about earlier today. She told me you attacked her.”
“What?” he shouted. “I did not attack her.” Lying about having sex was one thing, but accusing him of committing a crime was taking things way too fucking far. Hot, undiluted anger bled through him, making his limbs feel heavy. He let go of Juliana’s hand, afraid he’d squeeze too hard and hurt her.
“She said you cornered her, grabbed her arm, and threatened her if she told me anything else.” She shoved her hands into her pockets.
“That is not what happened.” He swallowed the ball of rage threatening to erupt from his mouth. There were a lot of choice words he wanted to say about Rebecca and the whole situation. “I never put my hands on her. I asked her why she was lying to you, and then I asked her to please tell you the truth. She proceeded to tell me you were a gold digger plotting to steal all my money.”
“Wait, what?” She crossed her arms, a scowl taking over her expression. “She called me a gold digger?” She let out a harsh laugh. “Trust me. I couldn’t care less about your money, if you even have any. No offense.” She huffed. “I cannot believe her.”
“Why do you, then?” It was a genuine question, but one he probably shouldn’t have asked because it came out sounding ruder than he’d intended. “I mean, you’ve seen how she is. Why do you even give her the satisfaction of listening to what she says?”
“Let’s find a place to sit.” She headed toward a bench a few feet ahead, and he fell into step beside her. She sat with her hands tucked under her legs, head down.
Tanner sat beside her, arm extended along the back of the bench.
“When I first met Zach, he’d just gotten out of a relationship with this girl named Callie. I’d seen her around campus, but I didn’t really know her that well. Anyway, when Zach and I started dating, she got real nasty. Called me some awful names and tried to start a bunch of trouble. Kind of like Rebecca.”
He sucked in a breath. She could’ve stopped talking right then, and he would’ve been able to put the pieces together, but she kept going.
“Zach swore she was just a crazy ex who was pissed because he’d dumped her, and that it was nothing to worry about. Then, one day out of the blue, Callie approaches me. She tells me Zach is cheating on me. Of course, I didn’t believe her. She tried to tell me so many times, and every time I dismissed her as a jealous ex-girlfriend.” She shook her head. “I was so stupid.”
“Hey.” He put his arm around her and pulled her over to him. She rested her head on his shoulder. “You are not stupid. Under those circumstances, no one would’ve believed her.”
“She failed to mention he was cheating on me with her. I walked into his room to find his dick in her mouth.”
Tanner cringed. “Damn.”
“That’s why this whole Rebecca thing has me so damn confused and angry. She’s making me question you…me…everything.” She flung her hands in the air then let them settle back in her lap. “I’m worried this is Callie and Zach all over again, and that I’m not willing to see what’s right in front of me.”
Well shit. How could he possibly get mad that she’d question him? Her fears and insecurities weren’t irrational. They were real and raw.
She put her hand on his leg. “I know you’re not him. I promise I do.”
He let his arm slide down to rest on her lower back and caressed her cheek with the back of his other hand. “I’d never do that to you, Jules. We’ll take this one day at a time, okay? For as long as it takes, but you will trust me. Eventually.” He kissed the top of her head.
Her eyelids fluttered, and she leaned into his touch. “Thank you.”
“Promise me if Rebecca says anything else, you’ll come talk to me.” He searched her face, memorizing every inch. When she opened her eyes and met his gaze, all the breath left his body, and his heart stopped. He swallowed hard, trying to shove away the one thought consuming him—he was falling for her. Hard. How was that possible when he barely knew her? It was like someone had rammed a tree trunk into his chest.
“Promise.” She smiled. “I don’t want to let her come between us.”
“Neither do I.” He kissed her forehead then the tip of her nose before tilting her head up and finding her lips. “So, can I take you out this weekend?”
“Actually, I’m going apartment hunting with Devon this weekend.”
“Oh.” He released her and stood.
“I think it’s best if I don’t live with Rebecca any longer, and Devon offered to take me…” She stood and gl
anced up at him.
He wasn’t thrilled with the idea of her spending the weekend in empty apartments with another guy, especially not Devon. “I would’ve gone apartment hunting with you, you know.” Jealousy knotted in his chest. He crossed his arms.
“Like I said, Devon offered. I didn’t ask him. And if he hadn’t suggested it, I probably wouldn’t be going at all.”
That didn’t make it any better. He clenched his teeth so hard, his jaw ached.
“Please don’t be mad.” Jules slipped her arms around his waist. “I’ll be at the Alpha party Saturday night, though. I can see you there, right?”
See him there? Christ, she made it sound like they would bump into each other and casually hang out, which was the opposite of what he had in mind. He took a calming breath. One day at a time. “If you’re going to be there, I’ll be there.”
…
The week passed quickly. Tanner spent every moment he could with Juliana, and Rebecca seemed to have given up on whatever game she was playing. Things were going well, and he was slowly earning Juliana’s trust. Tanner took another pull of his beer.
He glanced around the party, hoping to find Juliana. She’d texted to say she’d be here, but she hadn’t shown up yet. Worry nagged at him. Had she changed her mind? He knew she wasn’t the party-scene type, but if she’d decided not to come, why hadn’t she told him? From across the room, he caught sight of Devon. And that meant Jules wouldn’t be too far away. Draining his beer, he set the bottle on top of the TV stand and pushed his way through the crowd.
“Tanner!” Rebecca intercepted him and took hold of his arm. She leaned in like she was going to kiss him, and he pushed her away.
“What the hell?” He gave her the dirtiest look he could manage. Her face was beet red, and her eyes were glassy. “You’re drunk.” And if he had to guess, she was probably high on something, too.
“Duh. Isn’t that the point of these parties?”
“Whatever. Go have fun somewhere else.” He began to walk away when she grabbed his hand. He immediately yanked away from her.
“I am feeling a little sick.” She pouted and put her hand on her belly. “Maybe I need to go sleep it off.”
“Yeah, you should do that.” He managed to take another three steps before she blocked his path with her body.
“Why don’t you take me upstairs and tuck me in? Make sure I get there safely.” She ran her index finger down his chest, flicking the button of his jeans. “I’d make it worth your while.”
“Stop it,” he said forcefully and shoved her hand away. It was then he noticed Devon was watching, eyes narrowed. And then Juliana walked up and gave Devon a hug. Fan-fucking-tastic. “Seriously, Rebecca, go find someone who cares, because I’m not that guy.”
He firmly but gently moved her out of his way and crossed the room. Coming up behind Juliana, he wrapped his arms around her stomach and nuzzled her neck. “Rebecca’s trying to start trouble again,” he whispered.
She twisted around, her mouth landing on his. He groaned when her tongue grazed his, and he dragged his hands down her back, yanking her close.
“C’mon, guys. I don’t want to see that,” Devon said.
“Mmm, I missed you,” she muttered before she released him and turned back around. She laced her fingers with his and held his hands against her stomach. “Sorry, Dev.”
Tanner rested his chin on Juliana’s shoulder. “How’d the apartment search go?”
“Good. Found some promising places, put in a few applications.” She grabbed Devon’s beer from him and took a drink.
He swiped it away from her, laughing. “Get your own.”
“I’ll go get you a drink.” Tanner kissed her cheek then left to grab some beers. When he returned, Spencer, Brittany, Lucas, and Mariah were standing with Jules and Devon. She was laughing, happier than he’d ever seen her. He handed her a beer.
“Thanks.” She nudged his hip with hers, giving him a suggestive wink.
He spent the next few hours with his friends, keeping Juliana close to him. He’d stopped drinking because he was going to have to drive home, but by his count, she was on her third or fourth. Not that he cared. She was having fun, and he would make sure nothing happened to her.
“Jules!” Rebecca screeched, running up and throwing her arms around Juliana’s neck. Three other girls who looked vaguely familiar trailed behind Rebecca like they were her posse. “I told you I’d finally get you to go to a party with me.” She giggled. “So, let’s find you a guy.”
“Whoa,” Brittany said, voicing the disbelief coursing through Tanner.
“She has a guy.” Tanner pulled Jules to his side.
Rebecca scowled and got in his face. “And now she needs a real man.”
Beside him, Devon nearly spit out his beer. Lucas couldn’t stop coughing, and for a second, Tanner wondered if he was going to choke to death.
“That’s enough.” Juliana pushed herself between him and Rebecca. “I’ve told you from day one. I don’t need you to help me find a man. Stop it with all these games and lies. It’s not funny.”
“Oh, sweetie. I’m doing you a favor. Trust me. You can do better than him.” She jutted her chin out in Tanner’s direction. Her friends snickered.
He balled his hands into fists, the vein in his neck throbbing. If she continued to talk about him like he wasn’t standing right there, he was going to lose his shit, and that wasn’t something he wanted Jules to see. He shifted on his feet and took a deep breath, his nostrils flaring.
“You listen to me, sweetie.” Mariah’s tone was saccharine sweet and condescending as hell. “My girl Jules here”—she had one hand on her hip and the other waving a finger in Rebecca’s face—“knows how to keep her man happy, so she doesn’t need a new one. Unlike you, who gives every guy a free test ride and then trades them in for a new model.”
Tanner’s eyebrows lifted to his hairline. Holy shit. He’d never heard Mariah talk like that before.
“Whatever, bitch.” Rebecca crossed her arms. “Clearly you don’t know shit, or you’d know that’s so far from the truth. Just ask Jules’s ex. She couldn’t keep him happy.” A sinister grin appeared on her face.
Oh, fuck no. She was not getting away with this. Tanner slammed the beer down on the nearest flat surface, not caring that it splashed out onto his hand. “You listen to me, you—”
Before he could finish speaking, Juliana spun on her heel and rushed out of the frat house.
“Jules!” Devon was right behind her and out of the house faster than Tanner could process what was happening.
“Didn’t I tell you it wasn’t me you had to worry about?” Rebecca nodded toward Jules and Devon. “Those two have been fucking for weeks now.”
The air rushed from his lungs, and he almost doubled over from how sharp and painful her words were. There was no way Jules was sleeping with Devon. She wouldn’t do that.
“Go be a bitch somewhere else. No one wants you here,” Tanner said to Rebecca. “Jules!” He chased after her. She was standing in the front yard, face buried in her hands. Devon stood with his arms around her, and even though she wasn’t hugging him back, Tanner saw red. His vision was sharp as he stomped toward them.
“Do you want me to take you home?” Devon asked.
From where Tanner stood, he couldn’t see or hear Jules’s answer, but it didn’t matter. “If anyone’s taking her home, it will be me.” Tanner gently pulled her away from Devon and turned her into his chest. She was trembling. “Hey. It’s okay, honey. Ignore her. She’s just pissed and lashing out.” He kissed the top of her head.
“I’m so tired of her shit, thinking she can talk to me and about me however she wants.”
“Do you want to get out of here? We can go back to my place.”
She nodded. Without moving away from his embrace, she turned to look at Devon. “I’m gonna go home with Tanner.”
Shoving his hands in his pockets, Devon nodded.
Juliana stepp
ed out of his hold and moved toward Devon. “Thank you.” Then she hugged him.
A mixture of bile and red-hot jealousy rose in the back of Tanner’s throat, and he swallowed hard. They’re just friends.
She released Devon. “I’ll call you later, okay?” Moving back to Tanner, she took his hand and laced their fingers. “Please get me the hell out of here.”
Jules may have taken some comfort from Devon, but she was leaving with him, and that was the only thing that mattered. Bringing their interlocked hands to his mouth, he kissed the back of her hand, and then led her to his car.
Chapter Eighteen
As soon as Juliana was in Tanner’s apartment, she kicked off her shoes and made a beeline for the bathroom. She quickly took care of her business and washed her hands. Then she stood, gripping the sink, staring at her reflection. Rebecca’s words had sliced straight to Juliana’s soul, reawakening one of her biggest fears—she wasn’t good enough and couldn’t keep a man happy. Would Tanner feel the same way? Would he get tired of her and go elsewhere? She’d have to actually do something more than kiss him first. He couldn’t be dissatisfied with something he didn’t have.
“Want something to drink? Holly left a couple wine coolers in the fridge.” His voice sounded like he was standing outside the bathroom door.
The mention of alcohol had her stomach rolling. She’d only had three beers at the party, and she wasn’t anywhere close to being drunk. A little buzzed, maybe. Definitely relaxed. “No thanks.” Her phone dinged with an incoming message from Mariah. Hope you’re not mad at me for saying something to Rebecca. The bitch pisses me off!!!
Juliana chuckled. No. I’m not mad. Thanks for having my back.
Mariah: Always. Us girls need to stick together.
She’d never considered Mariah anything more than an acquaintance—until now. Now she was a friend, and that warmed Juliana’s heart. Smoothing her hands down her hair, she blew out a breath.