by Heather Lyn
“What’s wrong?” I mutter against her hair, burying my face into the softness of it.
“Nothing.”
Not wanting to upset her any further, I hold her tighter and settle back against the cushions, making myself comfortable. She sniffles against my skin, and that’s it for me. Pulling her from my chest, I force her to sit up, heart clenching when I see the tears, how upset she is.
“Em, what is this? Baby, I get it. I thought I was gonna pass out when I got to the park, but she’s safe. You kept Lily safe, so why the tears? Did something else happen?”
I brush at her tears, but more quickly replace them.
“Levi...” Her blue eyes, red-rimmed and swollen, meet mine.
“Em.”
“I love you,” she whispers. Her entire body is trembling as she leans forward to kiss me, her touch hard and insistent.
My hands tangle in her hair and I pull her back, looking deep into her eyes.
“You what?”
“I love you, Levi. I love you more than anything else in this world, except maybe Lily. I just wish I had been enough for you both.” Emmy’s eyes fill with tears once more and she climbs from my lap, rushing out of the room. I’m left sitting in stunned silence, unsure of what to even do.
She loves me? And what the hell does she mean, ‘had been enough’?
I get my answer a moment later when I see her cross the kitchen, grabbing her purse.
She’s leaving me.
Standing up, I follow after her, preparing myself for a battle. No way in fucking hell is this girl walking away from me.
Not. Fucking. Happening.
CHAPTER 12
Emerson
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” Purse in hand, I turn to find Levi behind me, hands on his hips.
“I’m doing the right thing.”
Slinging my purse over my shoulder, I prepare myself to walk past him, but when I step in front of him, he looks down at me.
“The right thing for who, exactly?”
“Don’t make this harder than it needs to be, Levi.”
“Harder than it needs to be? You’re joking, right? You think you can drop a bombshell like being in love with me and I’ll just say goodbye like nothing? Fuck that, Em.”
He’s angry. He should be. I completely fucked up.
“I’m so sorry. I need to go. I should leave.”
I can’t allow myself to make eye contact with him, knowing I won’t be able to keep my emotions in check when I walk away from him. But I don’t get more than a few feet away before he’s spinning me around and dragging me into my arms.
“No.” His voice is gruff and his hold tightens.
“Levi—”
“You aren’t leaving. I can’t let you.”
“You should hate me, Levi. I screwed up and put Lily’s life in danger.”
“No.”
Levi pulls away and lifts me so my legs go around his waist. Leaning my back against the wall, he takes my lips in a dizzying kiss, leaving me breathless.
“You saved her life. You saved my baby, Emmy. You fucking kept her safe, so what other way can I thank you other than to spend the rest of my life loving you?”
“Levi, I don’t...”
“Emmy, please. Don’t do this.”
His forehead drops to mine, and I can see his throat working to clear his emotions.
“I’m so scared, Levi,” I whisper, tears clinging to my lashes and blurring my vision.
“I know you are, Emmy. I know. But I’m scared too, baby.”
“Of what?”
Biting his bottom lip, he drops his head momentarily, and I allow a few tears to roll down my cheeks. Taking a deep breath, he lifts his head and trains those blue eyes on me.
“I’m scared you’ll walk out the door and the best thing I’ve ever had will be gone.”
I lose all control of my emotions and my face falls.
“I love you, Emmy. I have loved you for what feels like forever, and I can’t let you end us before we even get our chance. I love you. Please don’t leave me. Don’t leave my little girl.”
His words are thick with emotion, but they ring strong and true.
“Levi.”
“Please, baby. I love you so much.”
Letting out a quiet sob, I lean forward and kiss him, devouring his mouth, completely addicted to his taste. How I ever thought I could leave this man, I’ll never know. In seconds, my tears are forgotten about; all that matters is how badly I need him. I’m not exactly in a position to dominate him so I start rocking my hips, deepening the kiss so my tongue brushes his.
Levi groans against my lips, running his hands down my back to my ass. He grips me tight, shifting us so he can force my hips to rub against his erection.
“Oh...”
“Fuck, baby, the things you do to me. I need you, Em.”
“Levi… now, please.”
I’m panting as he moves his hips harder. We’re both in jeans, but the layers don’t matter. I’m minutes away from crashing into an orgasm, and I need him inside of me when I do.
“Hang tight, babe.” Holding me tight, he races up the stairs as fast as he can manage, kicking his bedroom door shut behind him. Twisting the lock, he drops me down and swings to the nightstand to grab a condom. His nostrils flare when he turns around to see I shed my clothes, standing there in nothing but a lacy bra and its matching thong.
“Motherfucker,” he mumbles, ripping his own shirt and pants off. The tattoos, the muscles, and God, his eyes—I’ll never get enough. Never breaking eye contact, he rips open the condom and sheaths his cock before striding forward. I bite down on my bottom lip when he reaches me.
His rough hands run down my body, making goose bumps break out over me. Hooking his fingers into my panties, he rips them off me, chuckling to himself.
“Proud, you caveman?”
“Mmm. Yeah, I am.”
Lifting me again, he braces me against the wall, his face buried in my neck.
“I’m an asshole. I shouldn’t be taking you like this.”
“Levi, I swear to God if you don’t get inside me now, I’m—”
In one thrust, he bottoms out, and we both cry out in unison. His hips immediately start a brutal pace and I force myself to keep quiet, knowing his daughter is asleep just down the hall.
“Fuck,” he grunts, breath coming in harsh pants.
“Levi.”
Every thrust he connects with my clit, and my body is thrumming with pleasure. He’s never been this rough with me, and I love it. He’s completely setting my body on fire as I clutch at his shoulders, nails biting into his skin.
“Harder,” I sigh, my head falling back against the wall.
“Em, fuck. I’m gonna...”
His rough thumb starts rubbing my clit and my legs tighten around his waist, my entire body stiffening as I begin to climax.
“I’m coming,” I moan, shaking through my orgasm, unable to keep my eyes open. Levi rests his head against my shoulder to muffle his groans, his hips punching forward. My body wrings his orgasm from him, his strong body trembling beneath my hands.
We take a moment to catch our breath, sweaty foreheads pressed together. Not removing himself from me, he carries me over to the bed, lying down beneath me. I brace my hands against his chest and sit up so we’re chest to chest. He cups my tender breast through my bra, the material scraping over my stiff nipple.
“Mmm. Do you have any idea how perfect you are?” Levi mumbles against my skin. His touch has me closing my eyes, my arms tight around his shoulders.
“I’m nowhere near perfect.”
“You’re perfect for me,” he whispers, kissing me softly.
How could I not love this man?
After another round of Levi working my body into a tizzy, we’ve come downstairs to get something to eat. The clock above the stove shows seven in the evening, but I’m so tired I have no idea how much longer I’ll be able to keep my eyes open. We’re sitting next to
each other at the table eating boxed mac and cheese, Levi looking completely beat.
“Em, I’m gonna head upstairs, get showered and stuff. I know it’s early, but I have to go to the shop in the morning and I need sleep. This has been such a shitshow of a day.”
Leaning over, he drops a kiss to my lips and then takes his bowl to the sink.
Watching his back, I can’t believe what he just said.
“Levi, you have to be kidding me.”
“What?”
“You’re going into work tomorrow?” Rising from the table, I carry my own dishes into the kitchen, standing next to him.
“Yeah, I need to finish my work from today. It won’t take but a few hours.”
“Your client can wait. You should be home.”
Levi turns around, annoyance all over his face.
“Em, it’s my job. Today was awful. I don’t know that I’m ever going to sleep the same, or rest until they find out who did this, but I need to work. I have bills, and this is a huge piece. It’s going to make me enough money to finally have a decent savings account.”
“And that’s wonderful, Levi. Really. But the guy should understand than your daughter is more important. Lily needs you.”
“I’m not doing this right now.” His voice is tight and he starts to leave the room, but I can’t keep my big mouth shut.
“Lily needs you, Levi. Don’t put your work ahead of that little girl.”
Turning toward me, he looks livid. So angry that for a moment I’m tempted to just tuck my tail and run for my life. I know he’d never hurt me, but I totally fucked this up.
“Don’t you ever imply that my daughter is not my priority.”
“Levi, I didn’t mean—”
“Stop talking, Em. Stop. I am the only person who has stepped up and taken care of her. While her mother was out fucking any person who would stick a needle in her, I was working my ass off to make something out of myself so my daughter would be proud of me. If I could just ‘take off work,’ I would, but life isn’t that easy.”
“I took the rest of the week off,” I whisper, eyes filling with tears.
“Well, I didn’t fucking ask you to do that, did I? It’s not like you’re her mother.”
He may as well have slapped me across the face. It would’ve hurt less.
Nodding, I try to hide my pain, but I’ve never been good at that. He reaches for me, but I’m done.
“Understood,” I grit out, biting down on my bottom lip.
“Fuck, baby, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have—”
“No.” I hold up my hand, stopping him. Tears are falling down my cheeks, but I keep my voice steady and in control. “You’ve said enough, Levi. I get it. I wasn’t saying that your job is more important. I was trying to say that Lily was almost taken from you today. Maybe for forever. Your job can wait. Cade would understand, and if your client didn’t, then fuck him. Nothing is more important that your daughter. And you’re right, I’m not her mother. Because if I was, I never would have walked away to begin with. I know you’re scared, Levi, and I am too because deep down, you know this wasn’t random. This man was way too prepared.”
He flinches at my words, but I don’t stop.
“Stop being such a coward and fight for your daughter. Fight for us! Because damn it, Levi, your family is worth it. So fuck you for making me feel any less than that.”
Hiccupping, I push past him, needing to put some space between us before words are said that we can’t take back. Reaching the staircase, I hear a loud crash, a loud curse, and then a bang. I want so much to go racing back to him, but I don’t. Instead, I hurry into the guest room and shut myself inside.
I never went to sleep. I’ve been reading on my Kindle for the past couple hours, mostly waiting for Levi to calm down. After crying myself sick, I thought on how he acted, the things he said to me. I’m hurt, yes, but really it was Levi’s way of crying for help. He’s scared and doesn’t know how to process it. Most people would’ve gotten angry at him and just left, said to hell with him. But I know my Levi.
He needs me. I need to heal his heart right now.
Finishing the chapter I’m on, I set the device down on the bed and go looking for him. Coming to the end of the hallway, I notice a light on in his office, the door cracked open. I hear his voice so I go to open the door, but I come to a stop when I hear him.
“You don’t understand. I can’t even stand the thought, Mom. I hurt her so fucking bad. She wouldn’t even look at me.” Levi’s words crack, and I can hear the hurt in them. Peeking in, I see him sitting with his back to me, one hand holding his phone to his ear, the other supporting his head.
“I love her. I finally told her tonight. I thought everything would be okay, but I said some of the most despicable things. I wouldn’t be surprised if she left me. I’m an asshole. From the second she entered my life, Emmy has done nothing but love Lily and accept the both of us, and I just threw that all away.”
Turning around, I head back down the hallway, but this time I don’t go back to the guest room, I go to Levi’s. His bed is still unmade from our earlier session, so I quickly strip the sheets and find clean ones. Once it’s ready, I shut off the lights and climb under the covers. Lying down on what’s becoming my side of the bed, I get comfortable and wait for sleep to take me. But it doesn’t. I can’t shut my brain off, and all I can do is think about today.
I force the tears away and try to think of anything else. Closing my eyes, I have just started to drift off when I hear the bedroom door open. Keeping still, I feign sleep, not wanting Levi to know I’m awake. With the darkness of the room, he must not notice me at first. But when he climbs into the bed, he bumps into me, and I feel his body go still.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I prepare for him to wake me up. But he doesn’t. Instead, he gently folds himself around me, pulling me against his chest. In just a few minutes, he begins whispering to me.
“I’m so sorry, baby. God, I’m never gonna forgive myself for treating you like that. You deserve so much more than an asshole like me. I’m just so fucking scared. Why would someone take my baby? I don’t know what to do. Please forgive me. We need you so much. I love you so much, and I’ll do anything to make this up to you. I’m so sorry.”
I feel what I swear are tears falling down my neck, and it breaks me wide open. Still pretending to be asleep, I roll over, needing to touch him. He still doesn’t realize I’m awake, so I bury my face in his chest, gently resting one of my arms over his waist. Levi has his face in my hair, and his chest hitches with emotion when I squeeze him. Knowing we still have a battle ahead of us, I close my eyes and, with my broken man in my arms, fall asleep.
Waking up, I blink against the bright sun streaming in the windows. I’m alone in the bed and I sit up, stretching my muscles. I quickly use the bathroom and brush my teeth, pull my tangled hair up into a messy bun, and head downstairs in search of coffee. Lily’s bedroom door is still shut, so I assume she’s sleeping.
Coming into the kitchen, I find Levi sitting at the island. He’s wearing his gray beanie I love so much, and has since changed into a pair of sweats and a white tee. I see the half-full pot of coffee in front of him, so I step around the island to stand across from him.
“Morning,” I say softly.
“Morning.” His voice is quiet and lifeless as he pours me a cup of coffee, standing from his stool. I add cream and sugar to my mug and watch him stride across the room to the back slider, looking out the window. I glance at the clock and see it’s only six thirty. So much has happened in the last twelve hours, and I just want it to be over.
Taking a sip of coffee, Levi comes back over to the island, placing his cup down. I turn my back on him, trying to find the right words. The air is thick with tension, and while only about ten feet separate us, it feels like it’s a mile. Our fight last night really rocked the two of us, and I have no idea how I’m supposed to fix this.
With the kitchen island separating us, I
steel myself before turning around.
Levi looks worn.
Broken.
My heart aches knowing how much he’s hurting right now, and I can see the pain in his eyes. The normally bright and clear blue orbs are almost a dull gray, and the stubble on his face just adds to his exhaustion. I heard him up pacing late last night when I woke up to get a water, and I now see that he never got any sleep.
“Levi,” I begin, unsure of what to even say.
“Baby.” His voice cracks on that one word and it spurs me on. Dropping my cup of coffee, I scramble around the island and jump into his arms, legs locked around his waist. My beautiful man squeezes me tightly and I feel the warmth of his body against mine.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers harshly, and I carefully pull back to look into his eyes.
“No, don’t. I heard you last night, Levi. When you came to bed.” Knocking the beanie off his head, I run my fingers through the dark silky locks and bring his face to mine. “I love you,” I whisper.
His eyes clench shut at my words, and he takes a deep breath.
“I love you so much, Emmy. So much more than I thought I could.”
“I know, and I forgive you. I love Lily as if she was my own, and I want to be with you. Don’t push me away, Levi. I know you’re hurting, but don’t try to hurt me. I don’t deserve that.”
“You don’t, baby. I’m so goddamn sorry. You’ve been more of a mother to Lily in the last three months than Dana ever was. We’re so lucky to have you.”
“I love you, Levi.”
I kiss him, smiling against his lips, then gasp when he runs a hand down my back, stopping only when he reaches my ass. Squeezing gently, I unintentionally press myself against him, shivering when I feel his hard length pressing against me. I pull away from him and find him staring right at me.
Levi smirks and then his mouth is on mine, groaning loudly when I bite his bottom lip. With me still in his arms, he guides us up to his bedroom and shuts the door behind him. Placing me on my feet, Levi reaches behind him to lock the door and turns back to me.