by W Winters
And she kisses me back, reverently and sweetly. Her hands find my chin and her fingers brush along my scruff to keep my lips pinned to her own.
My chest heaves in air as I fall to the floor next to her.
The cool air relieving my heated skin.
The only effort Aria makes is to inch closer to me, to have both her bare and clothed skin touching mine.
“I’ve been waiting for that,” she says softly as she nuzzles next to me, content with being held.
“For what?” I ask her, still catching my breath.
“For you to kiss me like that.”
To kiss her. The memory of her lips hot on mine begs me to kiss her again, but her words stop me.
“It was worth the wait.” The words fall easily from her lips, the same lips that look swollen and reddened from our kiss.
The reality comes back to me in this moment.
This isn’t what this was supposed to become.
I don’t know what the fuck she’s doing to me, but it can’t continue like this.
I’m ruining everything.
Chapter 38
Aria
I’m surprised I slept as well as I did.
No terrors, just a much-needed deep sleep. From whenever Carter brought me to bed, until nearly 2 p.m. this afternoon.
There isn’t enough sleep to mend the exhaustion I feel, but I’m grateful I’ve gotten through one night undisturbed.
As I shift on the wooden floor in Carter’s office, the ache in my muscles intensifies and I wince. I’m so fucking sore from last night. From this whole past week, maybe. I don’t know if this is normal or not, but I hurt. Every moment of the day, I feel him inside of me still and it takes me to the edge of both pleasure and pain.
Both physically and emotionally.
There’s no denying Carter is a broken and lost soul. And there’s no denying that I want to make all the wrongs in his past right.
My mind is a whirlwind of what I wish could be undone, but there are no answers that take pity on me and provide me with clarity. All I can think to do is offer him kindness. To obey, to be good for him. And maybe he’ll feel something other than the anger and hate that cloud his judgment.
I can only imagine the world he grew up in. The small pieces I’ve been given are jagged and harsh.
I shouldn’t pity the monster he became.
I shouldn’t love what he does to me.
But I do.
The short piece of chalk rolls back and forth between my fingers as I study the paper lying on the floor. I can’t remember what I drew at the park. The questions I had in my dream from not last night but the night before, are still alive and vibrant in my mind.
I can’t help but to think there are answers in my subconscious. Answers in my dreams.
But I can’t remember what I drew that day.
Instead, I keep drawing the same thing, the house from the photograph in the hall. It’s quaint and small, with rustic features. It’s definitely a backroad setting but there are other houses beside it. Close to each other.
The brick was old, and the mortar seemed even older. The weeds that grew up the side of it felt as if they belonged there like nature was intent on reclaiming the structure.
Whoever took the photograph captured the beauty of the home perfectly, but why does it call to me? Why do I keep drawing it and only changing the flowers that grow around it?
“There are four steps.” Carter’s voice breaks into my thoughts and I glance up at him, not registering his words. He takes his time rolling up the crisp, white sleeves of his dress shirt. I can’t help but admire the corded muscles under his tanned skin and remember how his hands gripped me last night, leaving bruises on my hips that still ache to the touch.
He gestures to the drawing. “The front porch had four steps.”
It takes me a moment to comprehend and I offer him a small smile before asking him, “This was your house, wasn’t it?”
He nods and adds, “You make it seem more alluring than it was.”
My heart tugs and a small knot forms in my throat as he returns to his laptop. Maybe if he grows to care for me, everything can be okay. It can be made right.
What a naïve thought.
“What are you thinking?” Carter’s question brings me back to the present again.
“I keep drifting into thoughts I shouldn’t,” I answer him without much conscious consent. Maybe I’ve rested so much that the sleep refuses to leave me, making me drowsy and my thoughts hazy.
“Like?” he prompts.
“Like, wondering why I love this house so much,” I answer him cautiously although my gaze stays on the paper.
“I hate that house,” Carter says after a moment and I move my eyes to his. The coldness in his eyes is ever present and it sends a chill down my spine.
“You hate everything,” I tell him absently.
“I don’t hate you,” he says pointedly, and his rebuttal sends a warmth flowing through me.
“How do you feel about me then?” I ask him and busy my fingers with the piece of chalk.
His words are softly spoken and it’s the first admission from him of any kind. “The very idea that you’re mine makes me feel as if there isn’t a thing I can’t conquer. But actually having you is… everything.”
I don’t know if he realizes how powerful his words are. How intense he is. Just being around him is suffocating. Nothing else can exist when he’s with me.
“What do you remember about last night?” he asks me, and I blink away the trance he held over me.
“Everything,” I answer him as if it’s obvious. “You came home. We had a conversation and then more on the kitchen floor…” I trail off and my teeth sink into my bottom lip at the memory. “And then you took me to bed.”
Carter nods slowly as if gauging my response. “You don’t remember what you told me when we got to bed? Do you?” My heart flickers once, then twice as I try to remember.
But I don’t.
“I fell asleep,” I tell him as if it’s an excuse.
It’s quiet for a long moment and an uneasiness washes through me. Like I’ve said something that I should regret but I don’t know what it was. Swallowing thickly, I steel myself to ask, “What did I say?”
But he doesn’t answer me, he only tsks in response.
A pounding in my chest and blood makes me feel on edge until Carter rises and stalks toward me. He looms over me, owning me with his presence as he likes to do. My eyes close as he lowers his hand to the crown of my head gently and then twirls a lock of hair between his fingers.
My heart races with his touch and I don’t know if it’s from fear or lust.
“All I want to do is fuck you until there’s no question in your mind who you belong to.” His admission forces my thighs to clench and that tender ache returns.
The tension and fear dissipate with each small touch he gives me.
“If you gave yourself to me, everything else would fall into place.”
His fingers trail lightly along my collarbone and up my chin then move to my lips, tracing them with a tender touch that I would have once found difficult to believe belongs to Carter.
“Is that all? Just give myself entirely to you to use as a fucktoy? That would solve everything?” My comeback is weakened by the gentle way the words flow, the flirtation that I can’t deny in their cadence.
His cock is right in front of my face, obviously hard and pressing against his pants. My mouth parts and my fingers itch to reach out and take him.
The throbbing between my thighs intensifies and I struggle to remind myself that I’m his captive, his fucktoy, his whore, and nothing more. All I can think is how much I want to pleasure him like he did me last night.
I want to bring him to his knees and make him weak for my touch like I am his.
“I want to…” I have to stop myself and swallow my words, feeling dirty.
He crouches in front of me, his gaze penetrating mine with
an intensity that begs me to lean away from him, to run from the beast of a man who isn’t hiding anything from me.
His darkly said words are whispered from his lips. “Tell me what you want, Aria.”
“I- I-” I stutter. Like an insignificant unequal.
It takes every ounce of courage in me to raise my gaze to his, to inhale a breath, and on the exhale confess, “I want to suck you.”
“You want to wrap these pretty little lips around my cock until I cum in the back of your throat?” he asks easily with a huskiness that comes from deep in his chest, moving his pointer to my lips and tracing them once again.
I nod, forcing his finger to alter its path and graze against my cheek instead. I’m breathless, full of desire and want, numb to everything but him.
What has he done to me?
The thought hits me as he leaves me panting on the floor to grab one of the chairs in front of his desk and move it directly in front of me. He wastes no time, performing the task quickly.
He doesn’t speak as he sits down, both of his hands resting easily on his thighs.
My hand is shaky as I lift it to his zipper, but he catches me before I touch him. His grip is hot and demanding and steals my attention and breath just the same.
I’m pinned by the lust in his eyes as he asks me, “Have you done this before?” He tilts his head to ask, “Have you done anything before me?”
“Yes,” I answer him although it feels like a half-truth and just thinking that I’m partially lying to him makes my pulse quicken and body heat. It’s not the same. What I did with Nikolai wasn’t anywhere close to this. We were young, and I needed someone to offer me comfort. Nikolai was the only one there for me. I kissed him first, and I begged him to touch me.
I loved him, and I knew he loved me. Even if he would only ever be a friend.
But my father could never know about us and when Nik moved up in the ranks and I grew bolder, my father grew suspicious. I don’t think Nikolai ever wanted to risk his position for me.
And I didn’t want to risk our friendship.
What I had with him was nothing like this.
“Who was it?” Carter asks me. “More than one?” His head tilts as he releases my hand and my heart beats like a war drum.
“None of your business,” I tell him playfully and grab both of his wrists to move his hands to the armrests of the chair. “Let me play,” I tell him as if it’s a command, but the words come out as if I’m begging.
He doesn’t answer me, but his fingers wrap around the armrests and he doesn’t say anything to stop me.
I fumble with the button, my nerves getting the better of me as I move to my knees in between his legs. The sound of his pants rustling and the deep hum of desire from Carter’s chest fuel me to ignore my nerves.
He lifts his hips to help me after I unzip his pants and his cock juts out in front of my face. Shock catches me off guard. It’s larger than I thought. Veiny and thick. Instantly, I wonder how he fit inside of me. Squirming in front of him, I know he knows what I’m thinking. The rough and masculine chuckle gives it away.
I glance up at him as I wrap his dick with both my hands. I can’t possibly close my fingers around him, but the part that worries me is how I’ll fit him in my mouth.
I imagined taking all of him and pleasuring him to the point where he couldn’t control himself, but now I question if I can take a fraction of him without gagging.
Slowly, Carter lifts his hand as if asking for permission and moves it to the back of my head. “You can lick it first,” he offers low and deep, not hiding how his breathing has hitched.
The bead of precum at his slit entices me to lick it, and so I do. A blush and pride rise to heat my cheeks as the man seated in front of me shudders at my touch.
His large hand splays and brings me closer to him, urging me on for more. But I tsk him, grabbing his hand and placing it back where it belongs on the armrest.
He readjusts in his seat, but his eyes never leave mine. They’re darker than before, which only makes the silver specks stand out even more. The heat there leaves me wanting and I lean forward, finding my pleasure by covering the head of his cock with my lips.
The salty taste of precum and the feel of Carter’s thighs tightening under my forearms as I brace myself, make me moan with my mouth full of him.
“Fuck,” he groans, and his hips buck slightly, pushing him further into my mouth, moving against the roof and down my throat. And I take him easily, although my teeth scrape along his dick.
Using my lips to shield my teeth, I put pressure on his cock, taking every inch of him that I can.
My eyes burn as I lower myself more and more, and each time I get hotter and hotter for him. The thought of getting on top of him and taking my pleasure from him crosses my mind, but I resist. I want to show him I can give him pleasure like he gives me.
My nails dig into my thighs as I feel the head of his dick hit the back of my throat. It takes everything I have not to react. To not pull away and gasp for air as he suffocates me when his hips tip up and he shoves himself just a bit past my breaking point.
I sputter slightly, forcing him out of my mouth so I can breathe. I lean back but I don’t stop. Even knowing there’s saliva around my mouth, I keep working his cock with my hand and quickly take him back in and try to deep throat him again. The deep, gruff groan that Carter unleashes as I hollow my cheeks makes me feel like a queen. Like a powerful queen able to bring this man to his knees.
Through my lashes, I peek at him. At his stiff position and his blunt nails digging into the leather of his chair as he holds onto it instead of reaching out for me. My eyes drift upward as I take him deeper, trying to swallow. And at that moment Carter breaks.
“Enough,” he bites out and stands up, pulling his cock from my mouth and leaving me on my ass in front of him. My palms hit the floor hard, but I don’t care. The only feeling in my body I care about is the throbbing pulse between my thighs.
I can barely control my breathing as I look up at him. Carter Cross. Unhinged and unable to give up control. “I want you,” I plead with him from beneath him.
It’s true. I want him, and I’m unwilling to hide that fact any longer.
He turns his back to me, his pants sagging around his waist until he shoves them down, showing me his tight ass and muscular thighs.
His forearm braces against his desk and in one swift motion he clears it all to the floor. The phone, pens, his laptop, the papers. They flutter and crash to the ground all at once, but none of those things matter. The only thing I can do is stay victim to the intensity of Carter’s needs.
“I want you to ride my face. I need to feel you cum on my tongue.” His words make the ache between my thighs even greater. My need to feel him come undone even stronger.
My legs feel weak and ready to buckle as I stand, but it doesn’t matter. Carter grips my hips and forces a yelp from me as he lies across his desk, his still-hard cock jutting out as he lets me sit on his chest.
Before a single word is spoken in between my gasps for breath, Carter shoves my skirt up and shreds my panties.
As I watch the tattered lingerie fall to the floor, Carter reaches for my blouse, ripping it from the top and exposing my breasts. He tears at my clothes like they’re nothing. And they may as well be, judging by how quickly and easily they fall to his whim.
He said he wanted me to ride him. But Carter’s a fucking liar. His fingers grip the flesh of my hips and ass and he keeps me right where he wants me. He drags his tongue from my opening up to my clit, where he sucks to the point of me falling forward with a blinding pleasure that lights every nerve ending on fire.
My breasts hit the desk above his head and as I scream out, the door to the office opens.
I cover myself and try to hide, but Carter’s still ravaging my pussy when I catch Daniel’s shocked expression.
“Fuck,” is all he says, and he turns as quickly as he can to leave, reaching behind him for the
doorknob but failing to grab it. I’d laugh if I wasn’t petrified, knowing I’m about to cum. The pleasure swirls into a storm in my belly and threatens to ride through every limb, moving to the tips of my fingers in waves.
“I’m going to cum,” I cry out to the ceiling as Carter lifts me off him, shoving me down against his hard cock where it brushes against my ass, so he can see who the hell opened the door.
The door slams shut finally, and Carter sits up, making me fall back against the desk while his thick cock runs along the length of my pussy and I cum. The feel of his cock just barely brushing up against my entrance is what does it.
I cum violently, with my face and every inch of my body heated. I can hear Carter grabbing his pants and pulling them up his legs even as the pleasure rolls through me, paralyzing me and heating my body all at once.
Daniel Cross, brother to the most powerful man I’ve ever met, just witnessed me riding Carter’s face and taking my pleasure from him.
I shudder as my hand reaches up to cover my breasts. I can barely breathe as I hear Carter pull up his zipper.
I should feel shame of some sort. But I can’t bring myself to do it. I feel nothing but sated, breathless and fulfilled.
“I have to see what Daniel needs. Leave one heel on each side of the desk,” Carter commands me while grabbing each of my ankles and spreading my legs apart on his desk. “Wait for me.”
He grips my hips, pulling me closer to the edge of the desk as I nod. My skirt is rumpled around me and my hands instantly move to my pussy.
“If you want to touch yourself, do it.” His command comes in between his ragged breaths. “Cum as much as you want while I’m gone.”
I lie there, my back on his desk, my ass directed to the seat he rules in and my chest heaving as he leaves me.
I’m still catching my breath when I hear the door close.
Touch yourself, I hear his words again and moan just from the command. From the deep voice and cadence that can only come from a man’s voice filled with desire.
My fingers trail over my clit, but I can’t do it.
I’m so sensitive to even the slightest touch that I have to stop my movements before pushing myself over. I can’t do it. It’s so intense, I simply can’t bring myself to the edge.