by Lorrie Kruse
That kind of bad news he could live with.
Since he had time on his hands, maybe he could try putting in a few more studs. His thumb still hurt but it’d quit throbbing, and it wasn’t like it was the first time he’d ever had to work after whacking his thumb a good one.
He turned his chair and looked across the minefield to where Brad was crouched over the framework. It looked to be a mile away. If you can scale a rocky cliff, you can make it over that again.
The saw started up. Almost immediately, there was a high-pitched squeal. Matt looked that way in time to see the puff of smoke and Derrick jumping back like he’d seen a rattlesnake.
“What now?” his father grumbled as he ran toward the saw.
By the time Matt made it over the mountains and valleys, Derrick had the motor cover off and was poking at the melted wires. “Who wants to perform its last rites?”
“A better question is, who’s got time to run to the hardware store?” Carl asked.
“I’ll go,” Derrick said. He looked at Matt. “Want to do a road trip?”
“I think I could take time out of my busy schedule.”
“Make it quick,” Carl said as he unplugged the deceased saw.
Each rut in the lawn seemed more difficult to cross than the one before. Matt tried to ignore the burn in his arms as he lagged behind Derrick. He grunted like a wuss when he hurled himself into Derrick’s passenger seat, sighing as he eyed the empty wheelchair. Pulling off the wheels and storing the parts seemed like more effort than it was worth.
“I can put it in the back,” Derrick said.
“Nah. Leave it. I’ll just stay in the truck. You can move faster without me, anyhow.”
“You sure?”
Matt nodded. Now that he was sitting stationary, his arms felt rubberized and he wished he hadn’t given up afternoon naps.
Backing onto the road, Derrick said, “It’s great having you back. Feels like old times.”
They were still a sight short of old times, but it was getting there. Twice now, Derrick had picked Matt up and they’d gone to the Hideout, just the two of them. They’d stayed out too late, and he’d gotten too drunk, but it’d been fun. The only thing that would have made it better would have been having Crystal along and whatever girl Derrick was dating this week. That would be old times.
“How’s married life treating you?” Derrick asked.
Matt’s thoughts went back to this morning. “Great. Wonderful.”
“That good, huh?”
“I love her, but I really didn’t think living with her would be so hard. I know a lot of it is getting used to all the crap that comes along with the wheelchair, but it’s been over a month and it’s not what I’d hoped for.”
“I’m sorry.”
Matt shrugged. “It’ll work out, right?”
“I’m counting on it. I already called a bunch of guys about the bachelor party. Sure would hate to cancel all those nude dancers.”
Matt laughed. “Sounds like a good enough reason to get married right there.”
Derrick pulled into the parking lot of the building supply center. “I’ll make it quick.”
Ten minutes later, Matt still waited. The air turned hot in the truck, but Derrick had the keys and Matt had no way to lower the electric windows. With a car parked to his right, he could only open the door a crack, which didn’t help much.
He waited two more minutes, fanning himself with his hand while sweat trickled from his brow. He needed something more than his hand. A map would work, and Derrick was just the type to own a map and keep it someplace handier than back home on a shelf.
He opened the glove box. Three maps to choose from. A Wisconsin state map, a Milwaukee street map, and a Minneapolis/St. Paul map, all folded so neatly it appeared they’d never been used. He chose the Wisconsin map because it was bigger and had more oomph. With the first swish through the air, a slip of paper fell onto Matt’s lap—a bank receipt.
Seeing his bank’s logo at the top, he realized he hadn’t gotten any further calls about his loan payments. His benefactor must have given up.
“Thank God.” He started to toss the receipt back into the glove box. He hesitated. Derrick didn’t bank at Fuller Lake Community Bank.
Didn’t matter. Wasn’t his business.
Still, he scanned the receipt, feeling guilty for invading Derrick’s privacy but curious enough to override the guilt. His stomach plummeted when he recognized his own account number. His loan payments. Blood pulsed at every pressure point as he stared at the receipt. He couldn’t have felt more betrayed had he just learned Crystal was cheating on him.
The truck shifted when the tailgate was opened and the miter-box carton loaded onto the bed. The tailgate closed with a solid bang. Then the driver’s door opened and Derrick hopped in. “Sorry it took so long. I ran into…”
Matt shifted his gaze from the receipt to his friend. Derrick’s grin faded. He looked down at Matt’s hand. “Oh, shit.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“Why?” Matt held up the receipt. “Why did you do this?”
“Because you don’t deserve what happened to you.”
“Of course I don’t deserve this.” He slammed his fists against his legs. “But that’s not your responsibility.” He waved the crumpled receipt in the air. “My bills aren’t either. Damn it, paying my loans behind my back and not telling me was wrong. Just plain wrong.”
“I just wanted to help. I never meant to hurt you.”
The thing was, it did hurt. Not that Derrick had paid the loans but that he’d kept it a secret. “Why didn’t you say something, especially when I brought it up?”
“Because I know how you hate taking help from anyone. Admit it. If I’d offered you the money, you wouldn’t have taken it, would you?”
“Of course I…” He sighed. “No.”
“I knew your parents couldn’t afford it any more than you could, but I also knew they’d do whatever it took to get you the money. I did this as much for them as for you.”
It was hard to stay angry when faced with such an explanation. Matt knew his family meant as much to Derrick as they did to him. Still, it hurt that Derrick would do such a thing. “Thank you.” His voice was harder than he’d intended. “Don’t do it again, though. Okay?”
Derrick held up his hand, index and middle finger spread apart and the other fingers curled down. “Scout’s honor.”
Matt slugged Derrick but laughed while doing it. That’s what being friends is all about, the way you can be angry and still find something to laugh about. “You weren’t ever a scout and that’s the peace sign, you idiot.”
“Hey, I want peace.”
“Then don’t go paying any more of my bills. I mean it.”
Derrick nodded but his eyes didn’t meet Matt’s.
“What else did you do?” Matt asked.
“I sort of bought you a car.”
“Der…rick.” His loan payments. Now a car. What next?
His friend held up his hands. “If you don’t want it, you don’t have to keep it. I can sell it, easy. But it’s already being set up with hand controls.”
To say he didn’t want it would make him look like an ungrateful jerk. “What you paid, all of it, including the car, that’s a loan. I’m paying it back. Just as soon as I can.”
“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Good.” He shoved the bank receipt back in the glove box with the map. He grinned. “What kind of car?”
“A ‘67 Camaro SS. Mint. Candy apple red.”
“Der…rick!”
“I’m just kidding. It’s a ‘98 Grand Prix, but it runs and it’s got low miles.”
“Good, ‘cause that’s all I need.”
“Admit it though, the Camaro would have been cool.”
“That it would, indeed.” He leaned back and shook his head. Thanks to Derrick, he’d have wheels again. He was sitting pretty well financially. He was back to work.
L
ife was looking up.
§
Crystal’s CRX was already in the driveway by the time his mother brought him home. He dragged his chair into the front seat and then grabbed one of his wheels. He had the wheel on and was reaching for the other when he remembered. He’d been on the computer.
Where were the printouts?
What about the computer? Had he turned it off?
He couldn’t remember.
“Since Crystal’s already home,” his mother said, “would you mind if I don’t stay?”
“No, that’s fine.” Better than fine. He had a feeling it was going to be safer for her and Kaylee that way.
Wheeling into the kitchen a moment later, he put a smile in his voice. “Hey, babe,” he called out. “Home already?”
He noticed her standing in the kitchen doorway, her pretty floral dress replaced with a designer running suit, her idea of dressing down. Then he noticed the stack of printouts in her hands. He had only enough time to notice how closely matched the color of her outfit was to her red cheeks before she slammed the ream of paper down on the counter. “Damn it, Matt. You promised.”
“I was looking for a car.” Weak excuse, and he knew it.
She picked up the top page. “Michigan dog walks after four months of paralysis.” She crossed her arms, smashing the paper to her stomach. “How the hell is a Michigan dog going to help you find a car, Matthew? No, scratch that. How the hell is a Michigan dog being able to walk going to help you walk? Because that’s what this is all about, isn’t it? You walking.” She wadded up the page, threw it at him, and then turned and stormed away.
He sat there with the wadded-up paper ball in his lap and his eyes riveted on the stack of paper on the counter. She didn’t understand. The dog hadn’t shown any improvement in four months, and then one day it just started walking. That could be him. Maybe one day he’d wake up and, like magic, he’d finally be able to walk again.
She just didn’t understand any of it, and she didn’t want to even try. He picked up the wadded paper and brought his arm back, ready to hurl it across the room while mentally he saw himself wheeling away from the house. Where he’d go didn’t matter. Just away from here. Away from her.
He let his arm drop to his lap with the paper still in his hand. He didn’t want to be away from her. Not really. He loved her. Deep down, he did, even if right then it was a little hard to remember how they had once been.
A loud bang came from the front of the house. Just what he needed, after the day he’d had. He thought about leaving her to stew in her anger. He thought again about leaving. Just wheeling away and never coming back. And then he pushed those thoughts from his mind and went after her. The curtains on the front door still swayed when he got to the living room, and Crystal was nowhere to be seen.
He wheeled onto the front porch and found her curled up on the swing, her knees pulled tight to her chest and her arms wrapped around her legs. She quickly turned her face away from him but not before he saw the tears glistening on her cheeks.
Today had been chock full of stress. All he wanted to do was go back into the house and leave her to act like a baby, if that’s what she wanted. He couldn’t do that. Not with her crying. But he couldn’t go to her, either. Not when he was scared shitless that she was crying because she felt trapped.
“All day long that’s all you do, isn’t it?” she asked. “You sit at that damn computer and look for cures.”
“No, that’s not all I do. I went to work today, just like you’ve been begging me.”
She looked his way. “You went back to work?”
“Yeah. They started the group home today. Dad asked me to, said he needed my help.”
She shot out a laugh while she rolled her eyes and gave a quick shake of her head. “Your father. I should have known.”
“What is your problem?”
“I shouldn’t have to explain.” She pushed herself off the swing and stomped past him, back into the house.
“What the hell does that mean?” The woman was driving him crazy. He tipped his head back and stared at the porch ceiling. “You love her. You really, really do.”
§
Four days later, Matt still had no idea what Crystal had meant, but at least he no longer had to remind himself how much he loved her. And as an added bonus, today was Sunday, which meant he didn’t have to pretend to be a help on the jobsite.
He looked at his brother nestled on their parents’ couch next to Jenny, who was rubbing her very round belly. Hard to believe just six weeks ago nobody knew she was pregnant. He let his eyes shift to Crystal. He tried to imagine her stomach round, but he couldn’t make the vision stick. Probably because it was impossible to get pregnant without having sex.
“Have you gotten the invitations yet?” his mother asked Crystal. “I can help address them if you’d like.”
Crystal shifted on the hard wooden chair. “I meant to order them last week, but time got away from me.”
Matt studied his fiancée while wondering who that woman was because it sure as heck couldn’t be Crystal. The real Crystal had recited the wedding checklist over and over until he knew it better than he knew his shoe size. The invitations needed to be mailed six weeks before the wedding. That gave them only two weeks to get the invitations in the mail. Invitations that hadn’t even been ordered yet.
Invitations she was hoping to not need?
Choosing to believe there had to be another reason, he forced a smile. “Planning on staying up all night addressing them, babe?”
Crystal glared at him. “No, I was planning on you helping and our staying up only half the night.”
“Sure. ‘Cause we know how neat my handwriting is.” He said it in a teasing tone, but Crystal’s expression didn’t change.
“I know,” Jenny said, her voice full of excitement. “We’ll make a party out of it. We girls can address the invitations while the guys entertain Kaylee. Maybe I could convince Faith to come up. Surely she can leave the apartments for a few days.”
“You miss your sister, don’t you?” his mother said.
Jenny nodded. She caressed her stomach. “She was in Germany for Kaylee’s birth. I hope she can be here for little junior’s birth.”
Brad’s hand joined Jenny’s, their fingers meshing while they both caressed their unborn child. “It could be another girl, you know.”
“No. This one’s a boy. I can tell. Brad Junior.” She snuggled her head onto Brad’s shoulder. “Faith said she interviewed someone to take over the apartments, but the guy has a criminal record. Some disorderly conduct charge from ten years ago. Mom and Dad would never go for that.”
“Your parents ever hear about this little thing called giving a guy a second chance?” Matt asked.
Jenny shrugged. “They want someone they feel a hundred percent comfortable with.”
“That leaves me out.” The job would be perfect for him. If the apartment complex wasn’t in Milwaukee, that is.
“No, they like you. Mom always wanted you to hook up with Faith.” Jenny quickly looked at Crystal. “Not that he was ever interested in her, mind you. The crush only went one way.” Jenny’s eyes grew large. “It’s over, the crush. Faith’s not interested in Matt any longer.” Her gaze shot to Matt. “Not that she wouldn’t be. She still thinks you’re cute. It’s because of Russ. She’s married, you know.”
“Honey,” Brad said. “Maybe it’s time to be quiet now.”
Jenny nodded. She pressed her lips together like she was afraid of saying anything else.
§
When they got home later, Matt said to Crystal, “I can order the invitations. Save you from having to do it.”
“It’s fine. I can do it.”
“When, babe? On your lunch hour? When you should be eating? I can do it when I go for therapy.”
She turned away from him. “They need a deposit.”
“So? I think I can hand them a check as easily as you can.”
“Matt, w
e don’t have the money right now.”
Money. The simple explanation he’d been looking for earlier. If he could have stood and danced, he’d have done it. He wheeled to her and pulled her onto his lap. “Is that why you haven’t ordered them? Because of money?”
She looked down.
“Have you been worrying about our money situation?”
Her head rose and fell once.
“Aw, babe.” He snugged her up tight to his chest. “You don’t need to keep your worries to yourself. We need to discuss things like this, okay?”
She nodded again.
He brought his mouth to hers and kissed her once. “I love you.” He kissed her again. “We have enough money in savings. You go tomorrow and order the invites, okay?”
After she nodded, he kissed her again, deeply and with need. He thought of Jenny with her round stomach and pictured Crystal cradling Kaylee. They’d planned on starting their family as soon as possible after getting married. He didn’t want to wait. He wanted her pregnant now. He slid his hand beneath her shirt and cupped a satin-covered breast. He pulled his mouth from hers. “Let’s go to bed.”
“I need to write up the information for the invitations.”
“It’s waited this long. I don’t think another hour or so will hurt.”
She nudged his hand. “Did you see the expression on your mother’s face? I wouldn’t be surprised if she showed up here with address labels so we’d be ready when the order comes in. Speaking of which, do you have a list of people you want to invite?”
He pulled his hand out from beneath her shirt. A hopeless feeling that was becoming way too common struck another blow. What was the point in having a wedding when it seemed like all they’d be is roommates? “Sure thing. Got it all written out.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
After a week and a half of running for nails, sodas, and forgotten tools, Matt was starting to get used to being nothing more than a gofer. He sat in the shade of the tool trailer and watched his brother and Derrick line up a piece of siding. His father stood off to the side with Rex Johnson. Based on the waving of hands, he could tell Mr. Johnson wasn’t happy about the progress of the project. It didn’t help that every day at least one of the guys had to leave for a while to chip away at their backlog projects.