by Bella Emy
I walk over to her and take a seat on the chair next to her. I let out a breath, running my hands up and down my thighs a few times. The waiting sucks.
“Would you like some coffee?” I ask, looking over at her.
She turns her head to meet my gaze. “Huh?” That far off look is still there.
I scratch my head and try again. “I was thinking of heading down to the cafeteria and grabbing a coffee… I was wondering if you wanted some. There’s no sign as to how much longer we’ll be here until we hear something.”
She nods, my words finally sinking in. “Oh, no thanks. I’m okay for now. I don’t want to leave and miss the doctors if they come by.”
Yeah, I figured that. That’s why I had offered to get both of us some coffee. I figured she wouldn’t want to leave the waiting area now. But I guess she’s too out of it and missed most of what I was asking her.
I decide to try again, just in case she wants some, anyway. “Yeah, I hear ya. Would you like me to go down and grab you one?”
Adelyn shakes her head. “No, thank you, Mad… I’m okay.”
I nod. Maybe I’ll go grab her one, anyway. Maybe when she smells the coffee, it’ll awaken her tastebuds and she’ll decide she wants some, anyway. Maybe I’ll grab her a snack to go with it, too.
“Hey, how’s your father doing? Is he still here?” she asks, catching me off guard.
I furrow my brows. I never mentioned the fact that I saw him after we had our little discussion that day… after she spent the night babysitting me.
She shrugs and a new wave of tears fill her eyes. “Rick mentioned it… I was happy to hear you had taken our advice.”
“Yeah… everyone was telling me the same thing. I figured I might as well pull my head out of my ass and let some things go.”
The sound of her chuckle fills my ears. But instead of it sounding soothing and happy like it typically does, this time it just sounds sad.
“Well, either way, I’m glad you could see him. He’s doing okay, I guess?” She asks more so than states.
“Yeah. He’s right down the hall, actually. He did well with the surgery, and we talked a little since when I saw him a few days ago; he was out of it.”
She nods again. “They always are right after an extensive surgery. You should go see him again now. Maybe today you’ll be able to talk to him for a bit more.”
I shake my head. “No, it’s fine. I wouldn’t want to leave you alone.”
That same sad giggle leaves her throat. “Maddox, you were just about to leave me alone to grab us coffee. Now you don’t want to go to see your dad?” She raises an eyebrow.
Shit, she’s right. I was about to go all the way down to the cafeteria and leave her for a bit, but I won’t go a few rooms down to the hall to check on my dad while I’m waiting here?
“Well, I—”
She places a hand on my lap, and it causes me to stop mid-sentence. “Go see him, Mad. I’ll be fine. And if the doctors come out to give us some news, I’ll come find you.”
I consider her words. I guess I could stop by for a few moments and see how Pops is doing.
“Go ahead,” she pushes once more. There’s a twinkle in her eye and a glimmer of hope that makes me want to jump through blazing hoops of fire and do anything for her.
I had promised Rick I would take care of Adelyn for him. Well, technically, I hadn’t. I didn’t answer him when he asked. How could I? All I could think about in that moment was making sure he was still holding on. But in my mind, as he asked, I was saying yes. Of course I would take care of Adelyn now and always. But not in the way he was suggesting. I could never take his place as her man, no matter what. And for him to say she still loves me? I can’t even think of those words right now. They’re going to make me say or do something stupid.
“Maddox.” Adelyn’s hand gently squeezes my thigh and her sweet voice grips me back to the present. “Go see your dad. I’ll be right here.”
I nod and take a breath before saying, “Okay, I’ll be right back.”
She smiles, but again, in it, there’s nothing but sorrow. “Take your time.” She drifts her hand off of my leg, letting a coolness replace it in its absence, and then I rise to my feet.
But something doesn’t sit right with me. I can’t just leave her without saying anything more. Even though she knows I’ll be back soon, I need to reassure her I’m here for her through it all.
Surprising myself, I reach down and grab her hand. Squeezing it tightly, I say, “I promise.”
She offers me that same sad smile once more and nods. She’s probably thinking that I’m making her the promise of returning shortly, but in reality, I’m promising my best friend that I will always be here for his girl, the woman I realized too late that I fell in love with so long ago, and the one who I can never have because of it. She belongs to Rick, and now it’s my job to just make sure she gets through these next few minutes or hours or however long it may be until we get word on how he’s doing.
As I let go of her hand, it’s as if I’m letting go of all my emotions for her for good. I know how she makes me feel inside; I know what she does to me, but now, after everything that’s happened, I need to just put that in the past and try to move forward.
I walk out of the waiting area, and before I take another step forward down the hall, I turn around to look at Adelyn one last time. Her sad eyes are still on me, watching my every move. I offer her a small smile before turning back around and walking toward my father’s room.
I wonder if he’s still out of it today or if he’s feeling back to normal at all. Surely, he won’t be the same after the surgery he’s had. I’m just thankful I get some more time with him to make things right and hopefully move forward.
A few minutes later, I reach his room. Before I step foot inside, I see my mother sitting in a chair to the left of his bed; she’s sitting close enough that she’s got his hand in hers. Poor Mom. I know it’s killing her, he’s not well. He’s always been her rock. Now she’s the one who needs to be strong for him. But I don’t doubt that she can be. She’s always been a strong woman. Hell, there were so many nights growing up when Pops would be gone at work and she had to raise us—three hell raising boys—all by herself. Sure, he’d come home every single one of those nights, but I know it couldn’t have been easy on her. My brothers and I are all very close in age. I’m three years older than Maverick and a year older than Mason. I imagine when I was seven or so, and my brothers followed close behind me, we were the spawns of Satan… or close to it.
Feeding us, helping us with homework, making sure we bathed correctly, not just dabbing water on ourselves, and keeping the house in order had to all be so consuming on her. I can’t imagine doing what she did raising us on her own when Pops was away.
And yet, even when he was there, she was the one doing most of the things, anyway. Sure, my father would spend time with us and make sure all was good, but Mom was the one who was taking care of us. Pops just brought home the bacon. And when I was old enough to look after my brothers myself, that’s when Mom and Pops opened the store. Then once he retired from his police duties, he helped her run the show.
And I think that’s what she’s missing the most now: having someone there with her through it all. She misses his company and all the love and comfort he provides for her. She misses him, her best friend.
I dart my gaze over to my father, who’s once again out cold. At least today he appears to have some color back in his face. That’s got to be a good sign. Or at least a better sign.
I grab the back of my neck and step foot inside the room. “Hey, Mom.”
She spins her head around and smiles at me. “Hi, sweetie.” Then she furrows her brows and looks down at the time on her cell phone in her hand. She looks back up at me and says, “Aren’t you supposed to be at work right now?”
I let out a deep breath and walk over to where she’s sitting. I place a kiss on the top of her head and then take a seat in the chair
beside her. “There was an accident…”
Her eyes widen. “What? Are you—”
I hold out a hand, dismissing her ill thoughts. “I’m fine. I’m okay. It’s Rick…”
Her hands fly to her mouth as she covers it while gasping. “Oh, my God… is he okay?”
I shrug because I don’t really know what else to do. I know once I tell her what happened, she’s going to flip out. First, because she’s always hated the thought of her boys—Pops and I—being cops. She’s always worried something will happen to us while at work, and she was right with Pops; he was injured on the job. I’ve been lucky thus far. Mason, being a firefighter, doesn’t save her sanity either. She worries about him just as much. The only one that sort of doesn’t give her agita is Maverick being an EMT. At least not as much as we do.
I take a breath and finally find the words to respond. “He got hurt… we were on the scene getting ready to make the arrest when the suspect fired shots. He jumped in and got in the way so I wouldn’t get hit.” I pause for a second because I know the next thing I add will not be easy for her to hear. Not like the first part of it was, anyway. She’s known Rick for so many years and she cares about him, too. “That bullet was meant for me.”
“Oh, Maddox! Oh my God… is he…”
She’s asking me if he’s dead… if my best friend has been killed in the line of duty. God, I can’t even imagine losing him. Thank God he wasn’t killed. “He’s down the hall in surgery now. He got hit in the chest, but he’s okay so far.”
So far, because at any given moment, shit can change. I’ve seen it happen so many times before in this line of work.
Mom lets out an audible sigh of relief as she places a hand on her chest. “Oh, thank God he’s okay. I get so worried sick about you kids and your jobs. I know you’re being heroes and all, but as a mother, and even as a wife back then, I hate it so much. But I understand why you do what you do. I was the wife of the cop for a long time… now I’m the mother of one and the mother of the firefighter. It’s the type of anxiety that I don’t think will ever go away, no matter how long I do it.”
I nod. “I know, Mom.” I look over at my father lying peacefully on the cot, then I turn back to face her. “How’s he doing?”
Mom tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear before saying, “He’s a lot better than what he was a few days ago when you saw him fresh out of surgery. He was up for a while, talking and all. I actually couldn’t shut him up. He’s like his normal self once more.” She giggles.
I smile. “That’s good to hear.”
“Yeah, my pain in the ass is back.”
Now she’s got me laughing. “Good. I’m glad.”
“Is anyone else here for Rick, or it’s just you?” She grips at a thread on the bottom of her shirt and tugs it off in one swift movement. She knows exactly how to do that without making a hole in her shirt. Every time I pull on a piece of thread on an article of clothing, I always manage to fuck it up.
I nod. “Adelyn is out in the waiting area.”
Mom’s eyes brighten at the mention of her name. “Oh, maybe I’ll go say hello and see how she’s doing. Would you mind if I do that?”
Smirking, I answer. “No, not at all. She’s always asking me about you guys.”
She smiles. “I always did like that young lady.”
Me too.
I don’t say another word. Thinking it is one thing, but actually saying it? No way.
Mom gets up from her seat and stretches her arms. “Okay, I’ll be back soon. If your father wakes up, let him know I’m right down the hall.”
“Will do.”
I watch her as she picks up her purse from the empty chair in the corner of the room. She positions it comfortably on her left shoulder and walks out with a wave.
I wave back and then avert my attention back to my father who I now notice is wide awake, lying in the bed silently.
I smile again. “Hey, Pops. You’re up.”
He sits up slowly as he presses the buttons on the bed and then coughs. “Hand me some water, will ya?” He points to his plastic cup and pitcher sitting on top of the over-bed table.
I walk over to it and pour him some water into the cup. “Want me to get you some ice?” I move the table closer to him in case he wants to reach it on his own.
He shakes his head, motioning for me to give him the cup. “No, it’s fine.”
I hand him the water and he sips down the water in small sips. After swallowing the last sip, he places the cup back down on the table. “I overheard you and your mom talking… I’m sorry about your friend.”
Fuck, he was awake for that? We thought he had been asleep. Granted, it’s not something we would hide had we known he was awake, but I know stress cannot be good for him right now.
“Thanks, we’re waiting to see how he’s doing,” I answer and then lean against the windowsill.
He lets out a breath and then coughs again. It’s small and pathetic.
“You okay, Pops?”
He waves a dismissive hand in my direction. “I’m fine. Doctors said it’s normal because you already know your mother asked them about it.”
I chuckle. “Yeah, that sounds like Mom.”
He nods. “This job isn’t easy on anyone, yours I mean.”
“It’s not…”
“That was a very brave thing Rick did for you, so you would be okay.”
I smirk. “Brave and stupid. Now he’s lying down the hall as they operate on him. I wish he hadn’t done that. He’s got so much going for him right now.”
Adelyn.
Pops furrows his brows. “And you don’t, Maddox?”
I shrug. “I guess, but come on, Pops. He’s got his entire life planned out. He’s going to be marrying the girl of his dreams in a couple of weeks, and now he’s put that in jeopardy by getting injured. He should have just let me take the bullet.”
“I don’t think you’re stupid enough to do it, but please tell me you won’t express these feelings to your mother, even if it’s really how you feel…” He looks at me sideways.
I let out a chuckle. “No, of course not.” Yeah, my mother would never appreciate me saying something like that.
“Good. Now stop talking nonsense and be thankful you’re fine.”
I shrug. “I am, Pops. Trust me, I am. I just wish Rick would be okay, too. It’s scary to think he could have died on the scene.”
He nods. “I’ve seen many officers get shot in the line of duty when I was a cop. Knowing your life could end while you’re at work doing your job… it’s not easy.”
He’s right. Of course, it’s crossed my mind so many times, but to see Rick get shot, trying to save me, no less? It’s not something I ever imagined would happen.
“Have you been here long waiting to see how he’s doing?” he asks.
“A few hours. We’re hoping to hear something soon.”
Nodding again, he adjusts himself on the cot. “Did your mother tell you the news about the store?”
I furrow my brows. “No, we only got to speak for a few minutes before she went to go see Ad. What news?”
He offers me a small smile. “Looks like there’s a good chance things are picking up again. Maverick showed us the books from the last couple of days, and we’ve made some huge sales. Things are looking up. Hopefully, they continue and we’ll be back up on our feet soon. Including myself.” He chuckles.
I follow suit. “Well, that’s great things are going well, but you have no business getting back up on your feet and back to work anytime soon. I’ll stop by when I can to help out and I’m sure Mase and Mav will continue helping, too.”
“Thank God for you boys.”
I could be mistaken, but it appears as though my father is getting teary-eyed. Pops is not one to ever really show emotion, so this is totally not like him.
He tilts his head up to the ceiling, and surprising me, he wipes at the corner of his eye. Yeah, he’s crying.
“Pops, ar
e you all right?” I take a few steps to meet him at the edge of his bed.
He grabs my hand tightly, squeezing it. “I’m so sorry, my son. I never meant for things to get so bad the way they were just months ago… I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He breaks down, hanging his head low.
I wrap my arms around him. “Pops, it’s okay. It’s fine. No need to apologize. Please don’t cry. That can’t be good for you, getting so upset and all. It’s nothing, we’re good, Pops.”
We pull apart, and he meets my gaze. “I never should have been so hard on you.”
I shake my head. “It’s okay, Pops. It’s—”
“No, you don’t understand,” he says, cutting me off. “I was so angry at you for letting your temper get the best of you, almost costing you your career. I should have never done that. I acted out of line. I took things out of proportion.”
I can’t let him take the blame for my actions. None of this is his fault, and I can’t have him regretting things now and possibly hurt his health. I’m sure stress would not help him at all.
“Pops, listen to me. We’re good, everything is fine. You did nothing wrong. You just wanted the best for me. You—”
“I was a prick to you, I couldn’t even look you in the face for something that I did so long ago.”
What? I’m so confused right now. “Pops, I don’t understand…”
He shakes his head and wipes the last of his tears from his eyes. “When I was your age, I got into a really nasty fight with another officer. You think you’re the only one who’s temper got the best of him? Well, you’re not. You got it from me, and I’m sorry for that. It almost cost me my career, and I just didn’t want the same thing to happen to you. That’s why I got so upset with you, but it wasn’t right for me to treat you the way I did, and I’m sorry, my son.”
How come I had never heard of this? Never in all my years had he or my mother told me about this little story. “Pops…”
He shrugs. “I’m not the perfect cop. I never was. But I’m hoping I can still be a good dad and not let you down.”