“Right…” he seemed quite uncertain on the issue. “Yeah… I read about you online. My name’s Stanton. A friend of mine went missing and I reckon you might be able to help.”
I tried to wipe the smile off my face, it was completely unprofessional and I deeply regretted it but… Woooooooooooooo! My first real client!
I put my most serious face on and opened the door. “Step into my office, Mr Stanton. Would you like a glass of champagne?”
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About This Book
Some of my favourite mysteries are the ones that take me away to exciting foreign climes. My family tended to go for rainy walking holidays in Wales and the north of England when I was a kid, so even Christie’s tales set on the south coast seemed sunny and exotic to me. Izzy references a couple of the more famous titles in this book and, in “A Corpse on the Beach”, I have tried to create an escapist holiday mystery of my own. It was largely written during the eight-week lockdown in which I barely left my house, and I think that escape is something we all need right now.
I’ve been living in Spain for fourteen years and it was inevitable that Izzy would make the trip to my adopted home in one of her adventures. This book is set on the coast a couple of hours north of us. Cantabria is a beautiful region. It’s green and hilly and has a stunning, sandy coastline which reminds me of South Wales, but with slightly warmer summers.
The Cova Negra hotel is fictional but based on the huge, Balneario spa hotels which are common in the north and sprung up to cater for rich travellers during the nineteenth century. They are grand, mansion-like buildings which are just perfect if you’re looking to bump someone off in a luxurious setting. One tip I have for potential murderers, try not to plan your crime with Izzy around, you’ll only get caught.
You can pre-order her next adventure, “A Corpse in London” here. After her holiday in the sun, Izzy returns home for the winter but is soon caught up in another investigation when a famous actor drops dead in Piccadilly Circus and his family enlist her help to find the killer. I’m afraid you’ll have to wait until September to read it but there’ll be one more book in time for Christmas so I don’t think I’m too much of a slacker.
Make sure you sign up to my readers’ club where you’ll be able to access the free novellas and stay up to date with new releases.
Acknowledgements
My favourite part of the back bit of the book, here are my sorrys… Sorry to Austrians Germans and especially my real-life friends Lio and Heike – you are not the people pretending to be you. Sorry to Spanish people for attempting to reflect the way you speak English. In my defence, I’ve taught my language in your country for many years and there are certain mistakes I have heard a million times. For anyone feeling insecure about their English, just remember that the vast majority of British people can’t construct a sentence in any other language and you should be proud of your ability – especially if you’ve just read this whole book!
Oh, and sorry to Keanu Reeves; Izzy and I actually really like you. Parenthood, Bill & Ted, Point Break and Speed are, if anything, underrated movies and you were great in them and many others (but perhaps steer clear of any more Shakespeare).
Thank you as always to my wife and daughter for being inspirationally wonderful and accepting of me as I locked myself in the office and wrote this, to my family for reading my books and my crack team of experts – the Hoggs and the Donovans (fiction), Paul Bickley (policing), Karen and Jonathan Baugh (marketing) and Mar Pérez (dead people) for knowing lots of stuff when I don’t. Thanks to all the fellow writers who have helped with this one too, especially Pete and Rose.
I will never stop being grateful to my friend Lucy Middlemass. You’re still with me through everything I write. And if there is any bright side, Lucy, at least you don’t have to keep reading my silly stories.
And finally, thank you so much to all of you who keep reading. In the last six months, I’ve had such a warm response to the books and I’ve really started to believe I can transform this passion that I have worked at for twenty years into a career that can sustain my family. If you loved the story and have the time, please write a review here. Most books get one review per thousand readers so I would be infinitely appreciative if you could help me out.
About Me
Writing has always been my passion. It was my favourite half-an-hour a week at primary school, and I started on my first, truly abysmal book as a teenager. So it wasn’t a difficult decision to study literature at university which led to a masters in Creative Writing.
I’m a Welsh-Irish-Englishman originally from South London but now living with my French/Spanish wife and presumably quite confused infant daughter in Burgos, a beautiful medieval city in the north of Spain. I write overlooking the Castilian countryside, trying not to be distracted by the vultures, hawks and red kites that fly past my window each day.
I previously spent years focussing on kids’ books and wrote everything from fairy tales to environmental dystopian fantasies right through to issue-based teen fiction. My book “The Princess and The Peach” was long-listed for the Chicken House prize in The Times and an American producer even talked about adapting it into a film. I’ll be slowly publishing those books over the next year on Amazon.
“A Corpse on the Beach” is the third Izzy Palmer novel in what I’m confident will be a long series. If you feel like telling me what you think about Izzy, my writing or the world at large, I’d love to hear from you, so feel free to get in touch via...
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List of Spanish References
Having compiled this list, I now realise that most of these things are food.
Food
Ensaïmadas are explained in the text, but let me reiterate how tasty they are. They’re fluffy and sweet and delicious. Possibly the best cake in Spain (as long as we’re counting Torrijas as a desert).
Jamón – Iberian ham is surely Spain’s greatest gift to the world (sorry, flamenco, Paella and Pablo Picasso). It’s worth flying there as soon as you can just to taste.
Pincho (de tortilla) A pincho is generally a bit of bread with something delicious on it that is sold in bars in the north of Spain. A typical night out for people in my town will be going from bar to bar eating and drinking at an incredibly slow pace that normally leaves me both hungry and sober. I don’t know where they get the patience from. A pincho literally refers to the toothpick or skewer that holds it together, it can have anything on it but is particularly good with jamon, tortilla (potato omelette), seafood or even…
Croquetas – I will probably never leave Spain as I have an addiction to these small fried crispy tubes of breadcrumb-coated béchamel. All the best ones I’ve eaten were made by someone’s grandmother but that doesn’t stop me from ordering them in every tapas bar I go to.
Pimientos de padrón – Small, green fried peppers about one in ten of which is surprisingly spicy.
Chorizo – chorizo (come on, Ramesh, that one was obvious.)
Crema Catalana – very similar to crème brulée. Often comes with cinnamon or a Marie biscuit on top.
Verdejo – a variety of delicious white wine common in the Rueda region not far from where I live.
Beicon con huevos – bacon and eggs
Perdona, Señora. Sabes hacer Lemon Meringue Pie? – Excuse me, madam, do you know how to make lemon meringe pie?
Menú del día – menu of the day.
A typically three-course menu available in Spanish restaurants which is affordable and almost invariably delicious.
Other Things
Buenos días, Buenos días, queso… croissant (to the tune of Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart”) – Good morning, good morning, cheese… croissant.
Agente – Officer – The common term for a normal police officer in Spain.
Hay una chica muerte en la playa – There’s a dead girl on the beach.
Perdona, dónde está la catedral? – Excuse me, where’s the cathedral?
Mi gato es blanco – My cat is white.
Policía Nacional – National Police – there are different kinds of police in Spain but as my fictitious hotel is located near a big town, they would deal with it instead of local or Guardia Civil.
Belén Esteban – I don’t feel you have to know who she is as Izzy certainly doesn’t. I included her as a joke for any of my Spanish friends who end up reading the book. She’s a really terrible TV personality on an incredibly trashy reality show called “Save Me” which aims to turn the suffering and mental breakdowns of over-exposed celebrities into entertainment. I’m not a fan.
Fascistas - fascists
El agente del amor – the agent of love (not a typical saying, as far as I know!)
Agente caliente - Agent sexy
Prostituta – I’ll leave you to work that one out.
Escoba – A typical card game played by old people in bars every afternoon across Spain.
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