Suddenly, my cell lights up. I don’t recognize the number, but I know that it’s local.
“Hello?” I answer.
“Tatum? Hey, this is Judy. Leo’s fiancée.”
“Hey Judy. How’s it going?” I ask, slightly nervous for her answer.
“Well, I wanted to let you know that Max has been over here for the past three hours. Leo and him have been talking in the backyard. Max looks, he doesn’t look so good.” She says sadly.
“Do you, do you think or know if he’s been drinking?” I ask, definitely scared of her answer.
“He hasn’t. But since he’s been here for so long, I’ve checked on them a few times, and I know the look he has. He’s stressed or upset, and he’s not handling it well right now, I overheard birthday or something like that, is it your birthday? Anyways, Leo asked me to call their sponsor, that’s how I got your number, when I got Mike’s number from his phone.”
“No it’s not my birthday, but I have a feeling I know what’s going on. Is Mike coming over?”
“Yeah, he’ll be here soon.”
“Judy? What do I do?” This is new territory for me, while I’m aware of how Max feels about me, he still has pent up emotions regarding his ex who passed away. I shouldn’t be jealous, but a part of me is.
“Stay put. Mike will put things into perspective. The good thing is that he’s not drinking and he’s talking to someone.”
“But not me.” I say as a tear falls.
“That doesn’t mean anything. I’ve been where you are. It just means that he needed to talk to someone who understands what he is going through right now. Listen, I’m sorry if I upset you. I’ll let you know when he’s on his way home.” She sounded hopeful.
“Thanks for calling and letting me know.”
We hung up. I scrolled through my phone and pressed the send button over a contact.
“Hey, it’s Tatum. Can you come over?” I cry into the phone.
* * *
Sterling sits next to me on the couch with her arm around my shoulder as I cry hysterically on her shoulder. She’s brushing the hair out of my face and almost cradling me like a baby.
“Why didn’t he come home to me?” I cry.
“Today is the 3rd hardest day he’s had to face since the accident. It’s Betsy’s birthday, she loved birthdays, especially her own. It was his mission to always celebrate her birthday in a big way, the way she liked it. Him being sober right now, makes him realize that he’s not able to do that, and last year he was drunk, so he didn’t really have the mental capacity to deal.” She offers the explanation as blunt as she can.
I continue crying, I’m crying because I’m selfish and hormonal.
“Betsy was my best friend, did Max tell you that?” She continues. I shake my head.
“Max had forgotten that as well after the accident. He forgot that I was in pain and hurting over the loss of my best friend, he doesn’t do that intentionally. He is an amazing guy, regardless of his past choices and sometimes asshole tendencies. This relationship you guys have, will see these sort of bumps in the road, because Max wears his heart on his sleeve and of what he’s gone through. He’s not completely transparent, but he sure tries to be. Give him a chance to come home to you and explain things, because he will, just give him a little bit of time.”
I nod my head and pull away from Sterling’s shoulder just as a text comes through my phone.
Max: I’m sorry, I haven’t let you know before now. I’m at Leo’s. Dealing with some stuff. Be home soon, I promise.
I show the message to Sterling and she smiles.
“See!” She says excitedly.
I feel relieved as I sink into the couch. Sterling stuck around for another hour before she left, I made myself a sandwich and only ate half of it, the other half still sitting on the plate in front of me as my shoulder is being shaken lightly. I had fallen asleep on the couch, and Max’s eyes are coming into focus.
“Let’s get you into bed.” He says as he moves his arm under me.
“No, I’m okay, what time is it?” I ask him.
“It’s late. Time got away from me today.”
I nod. “I know what today is, Sterling filled me in, it’s okay.” I say as I reach out to caress his jaw. His features smooth and he smiles.
“I didn’t want to bring any of it home. I’m sorry. I should have told you what today was, and I should have told you right away that I wasn’t coming home after work. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He’s whispering sweet apologies into my hair as he’s pulled me to a hug.
My hand is running along his back as I shush him.
“Never apologize for loving someone, dead or alive.” I simply say.
28
Max
She’s amazing.
She’s become my complete undoing and my savor all wrapped up in one. I can see the puffiness around her eyes as evidence that she had been crying earlier, and I know it was my actions that made her cry. I continued pouring out the apologies into her hair after I noticed the redness around her eyes and then she had to say something so profound, something so understanding to just blow me out of the park.
She’s amazing.
It’s late, too late to stay up any longer on a work night and have either of us be suitable for the following day. She finishes the last bite of her sandwich and then licks her fingertips. She looks at me and smiles, still finishing her chewing. I lean down and get my arm around her back and her other arm under her butt and pick her up. She grabs onto my shoulders in surprise as I stand and walk down the hallway.
She’s only slept in my bed with me twice since our relationship has kicked off, in fear of getting out of control during a make-out session, but now that our month of taking things slow is officially over, I want her in my bed every night. I turn into my bedroom and set her down gently on the bed. She looks up at me with her big brown eyes and smiles.
“I want to spend the rest of the night worshipping your body, but we have plenty of other nights to do that. Tonight, we sleep.” I smile at her slowly undressing. She licks her lips with her eyes watching the movements on my hands.
“But what if I don’t want to sleep?” She asks, playing innocent.
“You’re growing my baby, you need sleep to keep him growing.” I say pulling my pants down and adjusting myself in my boxers.
She lets out a sigh with my adjusting. “I don’t like this decision of yours, don’t I have a say too?” She crosses her arms over her chest, lifting her breasts up, purposely.
“Honey, I have refrained from getting caveman on you for 30 nights. One more cannot hurt either of us.” I say pulling the covers back and sliding in beside her. I then tug on her boxer shorts. “But I want these off.”
She rolls her eyes, pouts, then wiggles out of the boxer shorts and tosses them on the floor beside the bed. I pull her into my arms, her back against my front, and breathe her pineapple and strawberry scent in through my nose and close my eyes.
“This is the perfect end to a… an emotional day.” I whisper as I kiss her temple as my hand moves to splay across her growing belly.
“So the baby is a he?” She whispers.
“Today he is.” I smile with my eyes closed and drift off to sleep.
* * *
I’m not going to lie, I woke up in the middle of the night and rolled Tatum over and started feeling her up, I placed kisses along the skin not covered by a blanket and I eventually took it a step further. The month long wait to get more physical was well worth it, even if it was middle of the night sex and in the dark, with no extreme foreplay. Shit, I feel like this past month has been foreplay.
This morning, I had an extra pep in my step during my morning run, I even hummed in the shower while getting ready. Tatum lounged silently in bed and watched me with her eyes as I moved through my closet and dressed.
“Are you going to get ready for work?” I ask as I sit at the edge of the bed and put my socks on.
�
��I will, but I’m enjoying this scene.” She smiles.
“This scene?” I look at her over my shoulder.
“You know, the one where I stay in bed, and watch you get ready for your day, and while doing so I get excited and as soon as you leave the room, I take care of myself.” She smiles.
Drool may have escaped my mouth, my mouth which is currently lax from her admission.
“I…” I stammer.
“I’m fucking with you.” She swats at me. “I just enjoy watching you get dressed, I’ve never done that before. You seem to have a checklist as you get dressed.”
“Towel off, boxers, undershirt, shirt, tie, pants, socks and shoes.” I list sounding slightly compulsive in my routine.
“I have a shower routine, if I don’t follow the routine, I have to start over again otherwise, I freak out the rest of the day on whether or not I washed my face or put on deodorant.” She admits.
I stand and move over to her side of the bed and I lean down. “I learn something new about you every day. Hurry up and get ready, I can make breakfast or something before you have to leave?”
“I’ll grab myself a bagel on the way to work. You go, do important things, like build shit. I’ll see you later this evening.” She says reaching up and lightly kissing me.
I return her kiss, straighten up, and return to the closet to grab my suit jacket. I smile at her as I leave the room and head on into the kitchen.
29
Tatum
Max texted me during the day and mentioned that his parents want to meet the elusive Tatum and right now my nerves are getting the best of me. I’m not sure if they will accept me, or how I’m supposed to act. Do I show affection towards Max, will he show affection to me? Will I be compared to his dead ex? Will they talk about his dead ex? Oh my God, what if they like her better than me?
I’m in the bedroom, sitting on the bed cross legged staring off into space in my tank top and underwear, when Max enters the bedroom. He starts to loosen his tie and remove his dress shirt.
“Are you okay?” He asks.
I snap out of my daze. “What? Oh, yeah sure.” I nod.
“Uh huh. Nervous?”
“Me? Nah, I’ve got this in the bag.” I lie.
“Uh huh. Listen, my parents are easy going, they’re excited. They have been asking to meet you since I told them about you.” He shrugs off his pants.
“So they obviously know we have sex.” I confirm.
“Well, I’m not a teenager and we live together, so yes. I’m sure they are aware. Also, you’re pregnant!” He jokes.
“Let’s hope that they don’t think I’m slutty.” I frown.
“Babe, that won’t be a possibility. They’ll love you.” He smiles, brushing my hair away from my shoulder and placing a kiss.
“Did they love Betsy?” I shouldn’t have asked that. There’s no real change in Max’s demeanor, but he does seem cautious about answering as he sits at the edge of the bed.
“Yes, they loved Betsy. But that’s not to say they won’t love you. And before you even say it, don’t measure any bit of the amount of love they may had or still have for Betsy’s memories. They are well aware of who you are to me, and how much you mean to me.” He says sternly.
“I’m just nervous. When I get nervous, I get insecure.” I try to explain.
“No, I get it. Listen, I don’t talk about Betsy much. And it’s not because I’m harboring some love for her. I’m not pretending she’s a secret or anything. My parents and anyone else who knew her – they may bring her up. But I don’t need to. You have all of me. Well, so does the peanut, but you get the majority. How much someone else cared about Betsy will not affect you and me.”
“Okay.” I say in defeat, he makes sense. “Maybe we should talk about Betsy more. After all, you guys were together for a bit.” I suggest meekly.
“What would you like to know?” He asks.
“Anything, I only know the circumstances of her death, and what happened to you after. I know that she and Sterling were best friends, but other than that, I know nothing. I don’t even know if I should know anything, usually exes are taboo subjects.”
“Well, let’s see, where do I start… she worked as a paralegal downtown and most of the time she couldn’t talk about work because they were open cases with some huge companies going corrupt. So we pretended she was a superhero and during the daytime she lead another life.” He smiles fondly, it’s a different smile that I’ve seen on him since we’ve been together, almost a sad smile.
“She and I met in college, we were friends, because I was, well a little bit like I was when we first met, but not extreme. We started dating about 3 years or so out of college, she had a crush on Dane first though.”
“Does Dane know?” I gasp.
“Yeah, Sterling told him when they first started dating.” Max shrugs.
“Wait, Dane and Sterling aren’t childhood sweethearts?” All this is news to me. I sit up and Max gets off the bed and goes to his dresser and pulls out jeans and a shirt. As he changes he starts to talk.
“No, they’ve known each other since they were pre-teens. They had crushes on another in high school and college, but they didn’t get together until a few years ago. Sterling was dating a douche bag and when they broke up, Betsy started a game of truth or dare one night and I dared them to kiss. We both kind of played against the two of them. Then a few weeks later, we both came to find out that they were secretly dating after that game. Betsy instigated their relationship, but it was always something in the cooker.”
“Wow. So how come it took you two so long after college to get together?” I ask.
“In college, I was focused on having fun and school. I didn’t have girlfriends, and I didn’t apologize for it. After college, Dane and I were starting up the company and since we were so fresh and new in the business, we worked a lot. I had always thought Betsy was cute, but never really thought about her that way until she asked me to go to a holiday party with her at work. She was new in the law business so she didn’t have time for dating either as she was busy trying to impress the DA. So I got the invite, and then yeah, the rest is history.”
“What was she like?” Now that he’s opening up about her, I can’t help but to continue asking questions.
“She was adorable, out-going, invasive and sometimes quick to judge. She grew on a person, I guess. She had a prickly outside and a mushy inside.”
“Did you guys live together?”
“No. I asked her to move in but she liked her space and I didn’t mind that she danced around the subject. She had a bunch of stuff at the house, and she did stay over a lot, but it was never our home, it was just my house. She was always a guest, and she acted like it when she was here sometimes. That’s not to say that I didn’t want her to still move in after she said she wasn’t going to. But I just didn’t press it.”
I smiled. This was Our House, even though it’s legally Max’s. We have made it a home.
As if he could read my mind, he continues; “The house now, is no longer my house, it’s ours. And that’s special to me. I’ve never lived with any females other than my mother. You never treated yourself as a guest here, and I’m happy about that. Your stuff mixes well with mine. Maybe one day, we’ll want a bigger house but for now this is our families house.”
My insides have now melted. This conversation was a little too intense but it was needed.
“Now, get off your hiney and get dressed. I won’t complain if you wear that to my parents, but I have a feeling you won’t be comfortable.”
* * *
Max and I walked into his childhood home hand in hand. I wore flats so I wouldn’t trip and fall, but my legs were Jello. In between Max practically pouring his heart out before we left to the nerves of meeting the parents, I’m praying that I don’t land on my face.
“Mom! Dad! We’re here!” Max shouts as soon as he closes the front door.
“In here.” A deep masculine voice boom
s from somewhere in the house.
Their house is a two story ranch house, with an open plan. We’ve entered the living space and are continuing to the kitchen, which is around the corner.
An older couple moves gracefully around each other as they go back and forth between a counter, an island, the sink and the stove. It’s choreographed so beautifully, I feel slightly bad for eavesdropping on their moment. Max’s mom looks up and her eyes go wide. She hastily wipes her hands on her white frilly apron and is making her way around the corner to Max and I.
“You must be Tatum. Oh my goodness, it’s so wonderful to finally meet you!” She gushes as she surrounds me with her arms.
Max is snickering beside me, but his mom breaks her hug with me to hug him as well.
“Mother.” He greets hugging her back.
“I’m so angry with you young man!” She sneers at him pulling back.
“What did I do this time?” He’s reminding me like he’s a young boy in trouble, afraid of his mom when she’s angry. I know that fear, my mom was scary when she got angry.
“You’ve been harboring Tatum all to yourself, you never were very secretive with your previous girlfriends.” She says and looks surprised as she looks at me. “Sorry.” She says to me
“It’s okay, I’m well aware of Max’s previous dalliances.” I admit perfectly fine with her bringing up his past. That conversation we had really helped, I’m sure I would have had an insecure moment just then.
“Well, we’ve been busy. Tatum works, I work then when we’re not working…” He smiles with a flirtatious look towards me.
“I don’t need to know those parts of your lives.” His mom swats at his chest and turns back to the kitchen waving us further in.
No More Heartache: The MORE Duet Page 16