by Dana Archer
The last part of Ethan’s recommendation registers, but the hearing examiner’s grunt drops a rock in my gut with a wave of premonition I can’t deny. Vince is going to walk, scot free.
“Considering Mr. Yuran’s actions are a direct result of his older brother’s manipulation, I can’t in good conscience condone any more jail time, even if Vince spends his years in confinement among family and friends.”
“Wait…you can’t—”
“But…” The older human raises the gavel. “I am aware of the emotional strain this situation has caused Ms. Conway, and I want her to rest assured Mr. Yuran means no danger to her, so we’ll delay a final ruling for three weeks, during which time Mr. Yuran will be required to remain within a fifty-mile radius of this facility and check in daily via phone with me personally. Be aware any retaliation from Vince or his pride that are directed at Ms. Conway and results in her death will result in Vince’s forced confinement in a shifter-run prison for a period of one hundred years, the longest sentence for which a human’s death can confine a shifter. And, of course, if Ms. Conway has any issues or concerns in the meantime, I do fully expect her to report them to me or the general Shifter Affairs office in this state.”
The smack of the gavel echoes in the room with a finality that leaves me shaking and my blood boiling.
“A fair outcome, as expected.” Vince snaps the handcuffs, drops them on the table, then approaches me with a cautious, slow gait probably expecting me to retreat or run from him. His smirk turns into a full grin by the time he stops in front of where I’m holding my ground. He brushes the back of his hand under the edges of one pigtail. “Silver dipped in purple is an odd choice for your hair color, but it’s fitting. Matches those black lips and deathly shadowed eyes. Scratch what I so crudely said earlier. You look exotic yet bold, exactly as I remember you. A true fighter, even with Hell in your soul. Maybe once you make amends for the past, we can revisit the possibility of our future.”
Ethan steps between us, using his lean frame to knock Vince back a step. “Since the hearing examiner ruled against my recommendation, you’re a free man. Let me get you a ride out of here.”
“No need.” Vince glances at me. “My human parents dropped off a car earlier today and arranged for Shifter Affairs to reinstate my driver’s license so I’d be free to go home as soon as I went through this little formality. My dear mother even promised to have a cherry pie waiting for me.”
“Human parents?” I hadn’t known that detail before tonight. Of course, I didn’t know Vince was a shifter either until I got the call about this parole hearing.
“My birth parents were unfortunately killed shortly after my birth, and my uncle had no desire to raise me, so he gave me up.” Vince shrugs. “It was for the best, especially since it allowed me to have the pleasure of not only knowing you but becoming your lover.”
“Once.” I bite out the word. “We had sex once.”
“And I still think about that night. How it felt to drive my dick into—”
“Enough.” Power ripples outward from Ethan with the single word, and I can’t help but glance at the ground in the face of an alpha’s anger. “It’s time for you to leave, Vince of the Yuran pride…not cause a scene that will reflect poorly on your pride or the exalted role in it you now hold.”
Vince clears his throat, a sign that I’m not the only one affected by Ethan’s display of raw power. “Then I will. Until another time, Zoe.”
With that, Vince walks out the door. The hearing examiner and the prison guard follow him out, and Ethan turns to me with a business card held between his fingers. I take the heavy matte card with Jager Law Office written in elaborate script along with an address not far from here and a phone number.
“My personal cell and home address are written on the back.”
I flip the card over, noting the scribbled information.
“Call me anytime. While I don’t exactly consider myself a good friend of your owner, I respect the Royal feline. The Alexander pride’s been fair to the people in this area, including the members of my pack, even though we’re only single shifters.”
I raise my gaze from the cell number to the man who’s reminded me of the little detail that’s kept me on the run for the better part of a year. “Kade isn’t my owner. He’s my kitty.”
The smile on Ethan’s face brings a lighthearted glint to his eyes. “I like you, Zoe Conway.”
“People usually do until they get to know me.” I slip the business card into the front pocket of my oversized hoodie. “Then they back away slowly from the crazy woman.”
Ethan cocks a nearly white eyebrow. “If you’re hoping Kade will do the same, you’re going to be disappointed.”
Laughing, I turn my back on Ethan and walk out the same door my living nightmare escaped through, then turn for the bathroom near the employee stairs. “Doesn’t matter what he wants. If he gets clingy, I’ll leave.”
“Now that you’ve walked right back into his territory, he’ll never let you leave. Why do you think he sent one of his pride mates along to keep an eye on you? He won’t give you the chance. You’re essentially his prisoner now.”
My steps falter, but then I focus on the clunk of my boots on the aged linoleum floor until I reach the bathroom. “Then he’ll have his hands full. I don’t take well to possession.”
The door closes behind me, cutting off whatever Ethan might’ve said. With hurried motions, I kick off my boots and drag my lacy black leggings down, revealing the white scars left on my thighs from my encounter with Mira’s jaguar last summer. From the pocket of my sweatshirt, I pull out the bottle of fox piss and a plastic bag containing another pair of freshly washed leggings—solid black and fur-lined, a heavy thermal shirt, and my spare key to the Barracuda, then I yank the black sweatshirt over my head.
Normally, I’d simply rub a few drops of hunting cover-up over my legs where Kade healed my cuts and added his scent to my body. Since Kade got his hands on me yesterday, I smell him with every breath I take. He had to have nicked my tongue, my neck, my jaw, probably everywhere he had his mouth on me, purposely adding his scent to me. I hadn’t minded then. His kisses felt good yesterday. Today, his extra possessiveness simply means I have to take additional precautions.
The droplets of cover scent in my hands reek of, well…animal piss. I rub my palms together and coat my skin, from my face to my wrists and over my thighs.
I’ll be damned if Kade thinks he can control me. Nobody can. The only man who remotely came close to having any say over my life is rotting in his grave. Better that Kade learn this now.
Leaving everything except for my boots, the spare key, my phone, and Ethan’s card, I leave the bathroom in my socks, send Zach a text letting him know I’m ready, then take the employee stairs.
A warning on the exit door says it’ll lock automatically upon closing. With my hip, I push the metal bar and walk out.
The briskness of the night air hits me. There’s no sign of Zach. No sign of anyone. The darkened lot is quiet and empty.
A crazed laugh escapes me. When Kade finds out I ditched his brother, he’s going to have a coronary…if immortal shifters could actually have a heart attack. Either way, he’s going to be angry. And…I can’t deny the little part of me that enjoys knowing I’ve riled that man. Kade needs a little excitement in his life. If chasing after a woman he’ll never win gives it to him, great. Everyone should enjoy their time on this earth.
I hurry across the parking area to where the black Plymouth Barracuda I’ve used as a temporary home and getaway vehicle is parked. So many times, I’ve been tempted to hock Kade’s prized ’Cuda, but I haven’t been able to do it. The car smells like him.
Tiny hairs stand up on the back of my neck, an internal warning system I’ve learned to heed. I scan the lot. Zach storms from the front of the building.
I shove the key into the lock. It pops. I tug on the handle, and jump into the driver’s seat, tossing my boots on the floor
and slamming the door behind me. Then I turn the car over and peel out of the lot before Zach can reach me. His glare promises retribution, though.
With the gas pedal to the floor, I leave him behind and focus on putting distance between me and everyone. I don’t need or want any witnesses tonight. Crying is ugly and only makes other people uncomfortable.
It also makes me feel like some weak pathetic loser who can’t let go of the past. I lost my baby and my fiancé years ago. I should’ve moved on by now. I should’ve made peace with everything. I haven’t, though. As soon as the nightmares get too much, I run like a coward, too afraid of my own crazy mind or the desire for the blood of my enemies on my hands.
I’m done. Bad dreams can’t hurt me. Neither can memories or the sick little wishes for revenge. I don’t have to give in to any of it. The experience I went through is over. I’ve got to let it go!
It’s time to stop acting like a baby and grow up.
I shift into a higher gear and let the rumble of the engine surround me as my thoughts settle over me, except nothing I tell myself lends me any confidence tonight will be different.
How am I supposed to let the past go when I only remember bits and pieces of it, and I’m not even sure those snippets I recall are correct?
With the gas pedal to the floor, I speed into the curve until the car’s speedometer pushes eighty and the tires slide, warning me I’ll lose control if I don’t ease up. For a moment, I consider downshifting and sending the car into a spin. As fast as I’m going, I’d likely be ejected from the car. The old-time lap seat belt buckled over my upper thighs doesn’t even tighten enough to stop me from sliding forward whenever I slam on the brakes.
“Go ahead. Die, Zoe Jane. Die, but know I’ll live on. Forever.”
Working my jaw until it cracks, I ease up on the gas, pulling out of the turn, and focus on the road ahead as my own twisted thoughts linger, shadowing me and reminding me of the truth. Death won’t free me from the past. My soul will remember and carry this pain into my next life.
I’ll never be free.
Six
Kade
Everyone outside the pride assumes the prophesized ones will call me alpha. It’s not a crazy assumption considering everyone outside the pride assumes Mira is still tied to me in the way of a pride mate.
Of course, they’re all wrong.
The sound of fizzing soda draws my focus to Mira’s alpha leader, her beloved human, her soul-bonded mate, and her husband. Josh pours the carbonated liquid into a tilted ice-filled mug. I’ve seen him pour beer the same way many times. With a pregnant mate and two young children at home, the only beer he has in the fridge is the root beer variety. Fine by me; I can’t afford to get drunk.
“Word among the alphas is that the Purists will be coming after your babies.”
Josh slightly lifts the two-liter bottle, stopping the flow of soda, and cuts me a look over his shoulder. “Rumor? Or a definite?”
“Somewhere in between, but I’m planning on it.”
“Do you think we need to call Shifter Affairs and take them up on their offer to help us disappear?”
The last-ditch option isn’t one I want to consider. How am I supposed to protect Mira and her family if they’re moved to parts unknown? And who will lure Zoe back to me if she leaves? Love for her brother brought her this time. It had nothing to do with me. I shake my head. “Not yet. Everyone is on alert and keeping an eye out for any new shifters entering our area.”
“You know that won’t stop an extremist on a mission, right?”
“Your babies can’t change the world if they’re hidden away from it.”
“They can’t change the world if they’re dead either.”
I take the mug Josh hands me. The cool glass under my fingertips holds my anger at bay. Such a simple thing, but I’m grateful for it. I sip the sweetened liquid, giving myself a moment to choose my words carefully. “Never before has the Alexander pride been so integrated into human society. We have human mates, friends, coworkers, and supporters. Our army surrounds us, waiting for the call to fight for us.”
“True.” Josh pours a glass of soda for himself, then returns the half-full bottle to the fridge. “But these are my kids. I want to protect them.”
“As do I.” I set the mug on the cartoon superhero coaster and follow the path of the condensation droplets from the rim to the corkboard circle as I consider broaching the one subject I haven’t mentioned since Josh bonded with not just Mira but the Alexander pride’s goddess, an unheard of union that not only granted Zoe’s human brother immortality, but gifted him with a trio of felines he can’t actually shift into, at least not in this realm.
Finally, I lift the mug, place a paper napkin over the hulking superhero, and set the soda on top. “What does our Golden Goddess have to say? Is she worried?”
“No, not worried. Excited. Her plan is working out exactly as she anticipated. Jealousy over her bond to me has spurred a rebellion in the heavens. Now other members of the heavens are vowing to take the path she has.”
I jerk my gaze to the human alpha leader. “Create a race of half-breeds?”
A single dip of Josh’s head confirms my guess.
“Why?” Dozens of explanations tease my mind. From reproduction advantages to dominance to preparation for the great war our goddesses have been predicting for centuries. Guessing is dangerous, however. It’s also unnecessary. With Josh’s tie to the goddess who birthed the first Alexander, the truth is a reply away.
Josh wets his lips, then turns to wipe down the counter the same way he does at the bar to clean up spilled beer. In actuality, the marble countertops in Josh’s remodeled kitchen gleam just as the floors do. Mira’s nesting instincts have kicked in. I didn’t spot a speck of dust anywhere in their home.
“The goddesses are forbidden from walking among the humans, yet for eons, they’ve been fascinated with the inhabitants of this world.”
“So much so, they brought the greatest warrior shamans into the heavens to entertain them.”
“And pleasure them.”
“True.” If the goddesses hadn’t taken human lovers, the Royals wouldn’t exist today. “The goddesses’ preference for humankind is long known.”
“And through her possession of me, your pride’s goddess can interact in this world.” Josh leans a hip against the counter. “She’s here with me right now, and she wants you to know she’s proud of you. That she’s sacrificed greatly to give you what you need to thrive. You just have to claim her, and you’ll have everything you could possibly ask for.”
Claim her.
My beloved human’s image flashes before me. “Our goddess means Zoe.”
“Yes.” Josh crosses his arms. “But despite what the Golden Goddess thinks, claiming Zoe won’t be easy.”
“She’s scarred from what’s happened to her.”
“Zoe’s not just scarred.” Josh drops his arms. “She’s screwed-up—mentally, physically, emotionally. I don’t know how else to put it. My baby sister is damaged goods, and a whole lot crazy because of it.”
“I know.” And I want to fix her. That’s the difference between before Zoe ran from me and now. I don’t just want to keep her contained. I want to unleash her. The woman who was able to avoid every tracker I sent after her—for the better part of a year—proves she’s a hunter in her own right.
“She doesn’t want another boyfriend, let alone a mate, and she’ll view loving you as a betrayal to BJ. According to Zoe, he was her once-in-a-lifetime love.”
“Then I’ll be her eternal partner.”
Josh studies me for a minute. “She won’t ever love you the same way. Seriously, she might never say those words to you. Are you okay with that?”
“Words aren’t necessary, and I wouldn’t want her to love me the same way.” Anything she thought she felt for the human would pale in comparison to what she’ll feel for me. Someday, anyway.
“I know what you’re thinking, but you don�
��t know Zoe. Stubborn is her middle name. She promised never to replace BJ. She won’t break that promise. Ever. Even death won’t sway her.”
“Let her keep her promise.” I drain the soda, the cold drink numbing my throat. “She’ll make a different one to me. A stronger one. A vow that’ll commit her to walking through eternity with me.”
“Zoe believes in reincarnation.”
Shrugging, I rinse the glass out in the sink before placing it upside in the dishwasher. “Then she believes the same thing I do, the same thing every shifter does, because it’s true. Every mortal soul is reborn until it’s completed its journey. That’s a fact.”
“And she’s convinced she’ll reconnect with BJ’s soul in another life. She can’t do that as your mate.”
I still with my hand on the edge of the dishwasher’s door for a moment, then force myself to lift it until the door locks in place. “I’ll deal with it.”
“How?” Josh pushes against my shoulder, turning me to face him and proving he’s not afraid of me. Had another male laid a finger on me, I’d be obligated to exert my dominance. As my equal and my friend, Josh gets a bye.
“I don’t know yet.” Admitting the truth is a sign of weakness and one of trust. Josh will understand this. He’s been a part of our world long enough.
“She runs. Every time she gets close to a guy and he brings up exclusiveness or their future, she runs. Every time her emotions overwhelm her, she runs. Every time regret threatens to drown her, she runs. She’ll run from you too. You leave her unsettled and confused. Actually, she already has run.”
“And she came back.”
“For me.” Josh motions to the kitchen doorway. “For the babies Mira’s carrying. Not for you. Not for Mira. Not even for my parents. Zoe hasn’t even been out to see them. She called them. That’s it. She hates when our mom cries, and our mom breaks down every time Zoe walks out the door, knowing she might never see her again.”
“Zoe’s not going to run. I’ve had someone watching her since I left her this morning. Zach’s with her now.”