“Faster, Lorcan. Please.”
His fingers increased their speed in response to her plea.
“More.” Tanzi gasped as his touch became rougher, his cock moving in time with his fingers.
Tanzi clenched her muscles hard around him, her body succumbing to the spasms of electricity that surged through it. She gasped, then cried out, her orgasm hitting as his thrusts and fingers coaxed more from her. At the same time, Lorcan shuddered. Tanzi clasped him tight inside her and they plunged together over the edge of ecstasy.
When they drew apart, Lorcan nuzzled the back of her neck and shoulders gently. Tanzi turned to face him so that he could draw her into his arms.
“Why did you leave the Spae?” The words hung in the darkened air between them.
He held her close so that she could tuck her head into the curve of his neck. “I’ve never been able to talk about it. Even to Cal, and he already knows most of it. Somehow, telling you about it now feels right. Not easy...just right.” His chest hitched with an indrawn breath. “I grew up in a small fishing port on the west coast of Ireland. Home was a cottage a lot like this one. We were poor, but my childhood was a happy one.”
“Were you an only child?”
“Yes. My mother, as I’ve already told you, chose a mortal life with my father. The Spae women usually inherit the powers. It is rare for them to pass to a male child, but, when they do, they are more concentrated. I inherited my mother’s ability. She used to say I was special, even for a Spae. Very early, she recognized that I could become a great sorcerer, so I was sent to the monks in a nearby priory to learn to read and write. It was through them that I came to Cal’s attention. I was twelve when I left Ireland and went to Camelot to study with him. I suppose I was his sorcerer’s apprentice. My father was mortal, and he aged at a normal rate. He died when I was fifteen. I remember him, even after all this time, as a good man.”
“Like you.” Tanzi held him close, feeling the rigidity in his frame as the story unfolded.
“Perhaps. Along with my abilities, I inherited immortality from my mother, of course. Once I reached adulthood, the aging process slowed so that it was infinitesimal. My mother was the wise woman of our village, the healer, the one people consulted when there was a problem. That was back when magic was accepted, even welcomed, by mortals. But things changed. Over the centuries, fear of witchcraft became rife. Suspicion set in. My mother had to leave our home village and keep moving. I went back to Ireland to see her regularly, and each time she told me a new story of persecution. There was a refusal to accept that foresight and second sight were not indicators of witchcraft. Ironically, had the church elders only acknowledged her as a force for good, my mother would have been the very person to assist them in preventing the harm done by witches. In the same way that she managed, for a long time, to control the mischief done by that bloody pair of imps she adopted and tried so hard to rehabilitate.” He gave a shaky laugh. “Anyway, I was getting concerned about the danger she was in, so I asked Cal to come with me on one of my visits. It seemed as though they were targeting my mother, and I wanted his opinion. While we were there, the witch finder arrived in the area—”
He broke off, and Tanzi wrapped her arms more tightly around him. “It’s okay. You don’t have to go on if it’s too painful.”
“No, I do. Now I’ve started, I have to tell it all. My mother was imprisoned. She was subjected to the usual flawed tests. Cut with a blunt knife and the fact that she didn’t bleed was said to be proof that she was a witch. Thrown into the river and when she swam to shore, it was said that the devil had come to her aid. She was sentenced to death. Nothing I said could sway the witch finder. Then I hit on the idea of asking some of the other Spae-wives to come and give evidence. If they could just persuade him that my mother only ever used her powers for good, not evil, I reasoned, surely the witch finder must see she wasn’t a witch.”
“Did the Spae come?”
Lorcan shook his head. “Although the Spae originated in the mortal realm, they, too, had faced terrible persecution there. By that time, they had settled here on their own island in Otherworld. They refused to get involved. On the day of the trial, I was still hopeful, but no one turned up. My mother was found guilty and sentenced to be burned at the stake the following day.”
Tanzi reached up to touch his cheek. “I’m so sorry.”
He caught her hand to his lips and kissed her palm. “I was half-mad with grief and rage. I sought an audience with the witch finder. I pleaded—I actually went down on my knees and begged—for my mother’s life. The witch finder offered me a deal.”
Tanzi lifted her head, even though she could not see him in the darkness. “What sort of a deal?” She knew she wasn’t going to like the answer.
“One I couldn’t take. The witch finder would release my mother if I would provide him with information that Cal was guilty of practicing witchcraft. The deal was a straight swap. Cal would be executed in my mother’s place.”
Tanzi was outraged. “My God! Who was this man? Weren’t the witch finders government officials? How was it possible for him to offer you a deal like that?”
“I don’t know. The thing was, he shouldn’t have known Cal was there...or even that Cal was still alive. You know the story of how Niniane, the sorceress known as the Lady of the Lake, imprisoned Cal in a cave at Darnantes and that the mortal realm believed—still believe to this day—that he died there?” Tanzi nodded. Her father had enjoyed recounting the story of his half brother’s downfall. “Only, of course, he didn’t die. He was freed by the Dominion, the angels of the fourth choir, on condition that he went to work for them and kept his identity secret. Well, my mother’s trial took place centuries after Cal’s release from Darnantes. He was no longer known as Merlin Caledonius. He wasn’t with me in Ireland openly, he was in disguise. So the witch finder should not have known who he was. Since then, I’ve been over and over it in my mind. But at the time, I wasn’t exactly thinking straight. I told the witch finder in no uncertain terms what he could do with his deal.”
Tanzi had to ask the question in her mind, even though it might cause Lorcan pain. “Could it all have been a ruse to get to Cal?”
“That’s one of the things I’ve wondered ever since. I’ll never know for sure, of course. In my desperation to free my mother, I even went to the Dominion and told them about the witch finder’s offer. I explained that my mother was being used as a pawn to get to Cal and pleaded with them to intercede. They refused.” Tension quivered through him. “I couldn’t save her. I couldn’t do the only thing the witch finder would agree to. Even though she was my mother, how could I deprive the world of Merlin, its finest sorcerer, one of the greatest sources of good the mortal realm would ever know? On the day of the execution, I stormed into the town square and tried to drag my mother from the stake. The witch finder’s guards seized me and I was tied up next to her. They were starting to light the fire beneath me when Cal came to my rescue. It was too late for my mother.”
Tanzi held him in her arms for a long time until the trembling in his limbs ceased. “You never told Cal about the deal you were offered.” It was a statement, not a question.
“How could I? It was over and he’d have felt guilt about something over which he had no control. No, I turned my back on my past life, and renounced the Spae. I vowed never to have anything to do with the Dominion—Cal often wonders why I hate the angels—and took to wandering. That’s why I’m a renegade. The only constant in my life since then has been Cal.”
“You renounced the Spae, yet Ailie greeted you like one of her family.”
“If I don’t come here now and then, my immunity to illness and my ability to heal start to wear off. Being here is still one of the best and yet one of the hardest things I ever do. Ailie knows my story and she’s a good friend, but I avoid this place if I can.”
T
anzi frowned. “But you appear to be so happy here.”
“This time I have been.” He didn’t elaborate further, simply sighing like a man who had just put down a heavy burden he had carried for many miles. “I’m glad I told you, Searc.”
“I’m glad there are no more secrets between us.”
She wondered if he was about to say something more. Were there more confidences to come? Instead, Lorcan pulled her closer into his arms and pressed his lips to her forehead. “Let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow we need to get Igraine ready for the journey.”
* * *
When the time came to depart, the whole village accompanied Lorcan and Tanzi to the beach. Ailie had packed up enough provisions to feed them for a week, despite Tanzi’s laughing protest. The older woman hugged her close before holding her at arm’s length, her kindly eyes scanning Tanzi’s face. “This thing you feel compelled to do...if you change your mind, or it proves too difficult, come back to me and I will do all I can to help you.”
For a moment, Tanzi couldn’t speak, such was the force of emotion that swept over her. Sharp tears stung the back of her eyelids and burned her throat. If only she could take Ailie up on that offer. The thought lasted only seconds before she resolutely pushed it aside. These people had chosen a way of life apart from Otherworld with all its fighting, wars and politics. If Moncoya discovered her here, he would rip the peace of Spae apart, bringing chaos and bloodshed in his wake. And once this beautiful land had been conquered, what would happen to the Spae folk and their culture? No, Tanzi could not be responsible for bringing this idyll to an end.
“I wish it could be different.”
“Wishes are all very well. Sometimes we have to fight to make them come true.” Tanzi followed Ailie’s gaze across to where Lorcan was saying his farewells to the men. Even if the dual threats of Moncoya and Satan were removed tomorrow, she had no way of knowing what her future held. Ever since Lorcan had told her the story of how he became a renegade, he had seemed lighter of heart and yet more distant. It was as if one barrier around his heart had been broken down only to find another raised in its place. Perhaps he was simply preparing himself for the moment when they must say goodbye. Maybe she should do the same.
“Ready, Searc?”
The compulsion to throw herself into his arms—to beg him to stay here with her, to fight her father at her side—was almost overwhelming. Instead, she nodded brightly and placed her hand in his. With one final wave over her shoulder, she walked with Lorcan down the beach to the dinghy.
As soon as they were on board Igraine, Lorcan started the engines and soon the faithful boat was skimming across perfect blue seas toward the mysterious horizon Ailie had deliberated about.
“I told you about my mother. Tell me about yours.”
Lorcan’s words surprised her and Tanzi, who had been standing at the deck rail, looking out across the water, came to sit close by him on the bench. “I can’t. I don’t know anything about her.”
“You know she was a Valkyrie.”
“I learned from Vashti when I last saw her that our mother wasn’t born a Valkyrie. She was a faerie who joined the Valkyrie ranks...just as I intend to do.”
“I thought all Valkyrie were descendants of Odin.”
Tanzi shook her head. “It is true that the original Valkyrie were Odin’s daughters, but, over time, their ranks have been widened to include warriors from other races who prove themselves worthy.”
“So Odin could still turn you away if he thinks you aren’t worthy?” His eyes were fixed on her face, his expression impenetrable.
Tanzi’s exclamation was one of outraged pride. “Why would he think that?”
Lorcan shrugged. “Just thinking out loud. Back to your mother. So you never knew her?”
“No, she left my father when Vashti and I were babies. We assume that she returned to the Valkyrie, but we don’t know that for sure.”
“Moncoya must have done something pretty outrageous to make her up and leave her own children.”
“You’ve met my father.” The thought hung between them.
“True. So, when we get to Valhalla, what happens? You just walk up to Odin—or Zeus, Jupiter, Manannán or whatever the hell other name you give him depending on which part of the world you live in—and ask to undergo a test to become a Valkyrie?”
Tanzi laughed. “Because of my mother, I have always called him by the old Norse name of Odin, even though my father is descended from the Celtic sidhes, who call him Manannán. But you and I are not important enough to enter Valhalla. Only the Valkyrie, Odin himself and his chosen heroes may enter the great hall. No, when we arrive at our destination, I will go to the great palace of Gladsheim and seek an audience with Brynhild, the Valkyrie leader. I will ask her if I may undertake the required initiation tasks.”
“Will you also inquire about your mother?”
Tanzi looked out across the endless blue expanse once more. “I don’t know. How would I feel if I finally got to meet her? After all, no matter how compelling her reasons, she left us to be raised by a monster.”
* * *
It was early morning and Lorcan emerged sleepily from the cabin when Tanzi, who had been on the deck for some time, called his name for the third time. They had dropped anchor overnight in the shallow bay of a small island that was not marked on any of their maps or charts. Tanzi was practically hopping with impatience as she pointed out to sea. “Look.”
Lorcan came to stand behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his chin on the top of her head. “What am I meant to be looking at exactly?”
“Wait a minute.” He slid his hands inside her shirt, claiming her breasts as his lips moved lower to graze her neck. “Concentrate or you’ll miss it.”
“I am concentrating,” he grumbled, raising his head again. “And on something far more interesting than miles of ocean.”
“There!” Tanzi’s voice was triumphant as she kept her finger trained on the horizon. “Can you see it?”
“Bloody hell.” In the distance, an island shimmered into sight as though hovering just above the water. As Lorcan stared at the phenomenon, its outline became clearer. “When did you first see it?”
“About half an hour ago. At first, I thought I was imagining things, because it stays in view for a few minutes and then disappears.” Tanzi turned in his embrace. “Can it be what I think it is?”
He frowned, unwilling to accept the evidence of his own eyes. And yet, there it was. Where there had been nothing just minutes ago, there was now a large, mountainous island, wreathed in mist and stretching across the expanse of horizon. And, as Tanzi’s words implied, there was only one place it could be. “You mean, is it Avalon? I don’t know. I’ve only heard of it, never seen it.”
“I wasn’t sure if Avalon existed at all or if it was a mortal myth.”
“Oh, it exists all right. But the only person I know who’s been there is Cal, and then only once. All he’s ever said of it was that it was somewhere between a dream and a nightmare.” Lorcan looked back at the island. “The outline fits the description he gave of it. Three pointed peaks like cathedral spires, with the tallest in the center.” As they watched in fascination, the island began to fade once more from view.
“This reminds me of something Ailie said. She said that no matter how far beyond their own horizon the Spae strayed, they had never seen the Isles of the Aesir. What if that is because, like Avalon, the isles cannot always be seen?”
Lorcan frowned. “You’ve lost me, Searc.”
“What is the legend that mortals tell about Avalon?”
“Ah, don’t we need Cal here for the exact wording? He’s good at this sort of thing. Let me see, it goes something like this... On Avalon will be found the last bright hope, a memory of what once was before the darkness snuffed the flame. An
d there’s another bit about in the bleakest hour, the mists of will lift for those whose sight is clear. It was always thought to mean that King Arthur, the one true king, will rise again when the mortal realm needs him most.” A thought—outrageous and fleeting—crossed his mind. It was gone before he could fully grasp it, and Tanzi was claiming his attention once more.
“That legend suggests that Avalon cannot always be seen. Perhaps Avalon is one of the Isles of the Aesir. If all the isles have the same qualities—” she waved a hand toward the now empty horizon “—that would explain why the Spae have never seen them.”
Lorcan furrowed his brow. “It’s a theory...but a pretty flawed one. Why can we see Avalon and the Spae can’t?”
“Because we are meant to and they aren’t?” Tanzi hazarded.
“Why?” Lorcan persisted.
“I don’t know. Work with me.”
“I’m going to need a lot of coffee and some serious persuasion before you get me to listen to any more of this theory.”
“What sort of persuasion?” She was already laughing at the mock lecherous expression on his face.
“Why don’t you come a little closer and find out?”
As the day wore on Tanzi’s theory was beginning to look less far-fetched. They sailed onward, passing more islands that first appeared and then gradually faded from sight. These varied in size from tree-covered rocks to vast mountainous landscapes that shimmered in and out of view for several hours. Captivated, Lorcan watched in silence as the raw, natural beauty of hundreds of islets, coves and reefs unfolded and retreated before their eyes.
“How will we know which is the one we seek?” Tanzi’s whisper was awestruck as she nestled close against his side.
“I’m guessing that the gateway to Valhalla will be unmistakable.”
“I thought we would be prevented from entering these waters.”
Harlequin Nocturne May 2016 Box Set Page 47