“Princess,” he said after a lengthy silence.
“Yes, Thomas,” Annali said without even trying to hide the irritation in her voice. “It’s the Princess, now step inside before you let all the warm air out.”
“My apologies.” Thomas bowed before me, then stepped aside so Finn could come in.
Finn didn’t bow, and he didn’t say anything. His expression remained blank, and his eyes were too dark to read. He folded his arms across his chest, and he wouldn’t take his eyes off me, so I looked away. The air seemed too thick to breathe, and I did not want to be here.
“To what do we owe the pleasure?” Thomas asked when nobody said anything. He’d gone over to Annali, looping his arm around his wife’s shoulders. She rolled her eyes when he did it, but she didn’t push his arm away.
“Getting fresh air,” I mumbled. My mouth felt numb, and I had to force myself to speak.
“Shouldn’t you be getting back?” Annali suggested.
“Yes.” I nodded quickly, grateful for an escape from this.
“I’ll walk you,” Finn said, speaking for the first time.
“Finn, I don’t think that’s necessary,” Annali said.
“I have to be sure she gets home,” Finn said. He opened the door, letting in the frosty air that seemed like a wonderful reprieve from the suddenly stifling kitchen. “Are you ready, Princess?”
“Yes.” I nodded and stepped toward the door. I waved vaguely at Annali and Thomas, unwilling to actually look at them. “It was lovely meeting you. Tell Ember I said good-bye.”
“You’re welcome here anytime, Princess,” Thomas said, and I could actually hear Annali hitting him in the arm as I walked out of the cottage.
I took a deep breath and walked up the gravel road. The stones dug into my bare feet, but I liked it better that way. It distracted me from the awkward tension hanging between Finn and me.
“You don’t have to walk with me,” I said quietly as we reached the top of the gravel road. From there, the road turned into smooth tar leading back to the palace.
“Yes, I do,” Finn replied coolly. “It’s my duty.”
“Not anymore.”
“It’s still my duty to carry out the Queen’s wishes, and keeping the Princess safe is her highest wish,” he said in a way that was almost taunting.
“I’m perfectly safe without you.” I walked faster.
“Does anybody even know that you left the palace?” Finn asked, giving me a sidelong glance as he matched my pace, and I shook my head. “How did you even know where I lived?” I didn’t answer because I didn’t want Duncan to get in trouble, but Finn figured it out on his own. “Duncan? Excellent.”
“Duncan’s doing a perfectly adequate job!” I snapped. “And you must think so, otherwise you wouldn’t have left me in his care.”
“I have no control over whose care you’re left under,” Finn said. “You know that. I don’t know why you’re angry with me for that.”
“I’m not!” I walked even faster, so I was almost jogging. That didn’t bode well for me, because I stepped on a sharp rock. “Dammit!”
“Are you okay?” Finn asked, stopping to see what was the matter.
“Yeah, I just stepped on a rock.” I rubbed my foot. It didn’t appear to be bleeding, and I attempted to walk on it. It stung a little, but I’d survive. “Why couldn’t we take your car?”
“I don’t have a car.” Finn shoved his hands in his pockets and slowed down.
I hobbled a little, and he didn’t offer to help me. Not that I would’ve accepted his offer, but that was beside the point.
“What do you call that Cadillac you always drive?” I asked.
“Elora’s,” he said. “She lends me the car for work, the same way she lends all the trackers cars. But we don’t own them. I don’t actually own anything.”
“What about your clothes?” I asked, mostly just to irritate him. I assumed he actually owned them, but I wanted to argue with him about something.
“Did you see that house back there, Wendy?” Finn stopped and pointed to his house. We’d gone too far to see it anymore, but I looked at the trees blocking my view. “That’s the house I grew up in, the house I live in, the house I will probably die in. That’s what I have. That is all I have.”
“I don’t have anything that’s really mine either,” I said, and he laughed darkly.
“You still don’t get it, Wendy.” He rested his eyes on me, and his mouth twitched into a bitter smile. “I’m just a tracker. You have to stop this. You have to go be a Princess, do what’s best for you, and let me go do my job.”
“I really didn’t mean to bother you, and you don’t need to walk me home.” I turned and walked again, more quickly than my foot would’ve liked.
“I’m making sure you get there safely,” Finn said, following a step behind.
“If you’re just doing your job, then go do it!” I stopped and whirled on him. “But I’m not your job anymore, right?”
“No, you’re not!” Finn shouted and stepped closer to me. “Why did you come to my house today? What did you think that would accomplish?”
“I don’t know!” I yelled. “But you didn’t even say good-bye!”
“How does saying good-bye help anything?” He shook his head. “It doesn’t.”
“Yes, it does!” I insisted. “You can’t just leave me!”
“I have to!” His dark eyes blazed, making my stomach flip. “You have to be the Princess, and I can’t ruin that. I won’t.”
“I understand, but . . .” Tears welled in my eyes, and I swallowed hard. “You can’t keep going like you do. You have to at least say good-bye.”
Finn stepped closer to me. His eyes smoldered in a way that only he could manage, and the chill in the air seemed to disappear entirely. I leaned in to him, even though I was afraid he’d be able to feel the way my heart hammered in my chest.
I stared up at him, praying he would touch me, but he didn’t. He didn’t move at all.
“Good-bye, Wendy,” Finn said, so quietly I could barely hear him.
“Princess!” Duncan shouted.
I pulled my gaze away from Finn to see Duncan standing a little ways down the road, waving his arms like a maniac. The palace was right around the corner, and I hadn’t realized how close we were. When I looked at Finn, he’d already taken several steps away from me, toward his house.
“He can take you the rest of the way home.” Finn gestured to Duncan and took another step back. I didn’t say anything, so he stopped. “Aren’t you going to say good-bye?”
“No.” I shook my head.
“Princess!” Duncan shouted again, and I heard him racing toward us. “Princess, Matt noticed you were missing, and he wanted to alert the guards. I have to bring you back before he does.”
“I’m coming.” I turned toward Duncan, putting my back to Finn.
I walked with Duncan to the palace, not even looking back at Finn once. I was quite proud of myself. I hadn’t yelled at him for not telling me about my father, but I did say some of the things I wanted to say.
“I’m lucky that Matt was the one who saw you were gone, and not Elora,” Duncan said as we rounded the bend to the palace. The asphalt road gave way to a cobblestone driveway that felt much better on my feet.
“Duncan, is that how you live?” I asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Like Finn’s house.” I pointed toward it with my thumb. “Do you live in a cottage like that? I mean, when you’re not busy tracking.”
“Yeah, pretty much.” Duncan nodded. “I think mine’s a little bit nicer, but I live with my uncle, and he was a really good tracker before he retired. Now he’s a teacher at the mänks school, and that’s still not so bad.”
“Do you live around here?” I asked.
“Yeah.” He pointed up the hill, north of the palace. “It’s pretty well hidden in the bluff, but it’s right up that way.” He looked at me. “Why? Did you wanna go visit?
”
“Not right now. Thanks for the invitation, though,” I said. “I was just curious. Is that how all the trackers live?”
“Like me and Finn?” Duncan was thoughtful for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, pretty much. All the trackers that stay around, anyway.”
Duncan walked ahead and opened the front doors, but I stopped and stared up at the palace, where intertwined vines grew over a massive white exterior. When the sunlight hit it, it glittered beautifully, but it was almost blindingly white.
“Princess?” Duncan waited at the open doors for me. “Is everything all right?”
“Would you die to save me?” I asked him bluntly.
“What?”
“If I was in danger, would you be willing to die to protect me?” I asked. “Have other trackers done that before?”
“Yes, of course.” Duncan nodded. “Many other trackers have given their lives in the name of the kingdom, and I’d be honored to do the same.”
“Don’t.” I walked up to him. “If it ever comes down to a situation between me and you, save yourself. I’m not worth dying for.”
“Princess, I—”
“None of us are,” I said, looking at him seriously. “Not the Queen or any of the Markis or Marksinna. That’s a direct order from the Princess, and you have to follow it. Save yourself.”
“I don’t understand.” Duncan’s whole face scrunched in confusion. “But . . . if it’s as you wish, Princess.”
“It is. Thank you.” I smiled at him and walked into the palace.
THIRTEEN
captive
The debris had been cleared from the ballroom, much to Tove’s chagrin, but the skylights were still covered with tarps. Tove had liked having all the junk around because it gave me something to practice on, but he decided that the tarps would be easier anyway.
Duncan had stayed away today. I think his brain was getting frazzled from me playing around with it. Since he sometimes got hit with stray brain waves when I tried too hard, we all thought it’d be best if he hung around somewhere else fora while.
I’d been trying for hours to get one of the tarps to move, and all I’d managed was a ripple across it. Even that was questionable. Tove said it was probably me, but I suspected it was a strong gust of wind blowing across it.
My head was actually starting to hurt, and I felt like a jackass, holding my arms up in the air, pushing at nothing.
“Nothing’s happening.” I sighed and dropped my arms.
“Try harder,” Tove replied. He lay on the floor near me, his arms folded neatly beneath his head.
“I can’t try any harder.” I sat down on the floor with an unladylike thud, but I knew Tove wouldn’t care. I had a feeling he barely even noticed I was a girl. “I’m not trying to whine here, but are you sure I can even do this?”
“Pretty sure.”
“Well, what if I give myself an aneurysm trying to do something I can’t even do?” I asked.
“You won’t,” he said simply. He lifted an arm up, and holding his palm out, he made the tarp above him lift up and strain against the bungee cords holding it down. It settled down, and he looked over at me. “Do that.”
“Can I take a break?” I asked, almost pleading with him. My brow had started to sweat, and stray curls were sticking to my temples.
“If you must.” He lowered his arm and folded it behind his head again. “If you’re really having a hard time with this, maybe you need to work up to it more. Tomorrow you can practice on Duncan again.”
“No, I don’t wanna practice on him.” I pulled my knee up to my chest and rested my cheek against it. “I don’t want to break him.”
“What about that Rhys?” Tove asked. “Can you practice on him?”
“No. He’s completely out of the question.” I picked at a spot on the marble floor and thought for a minute. “I don’t want to practice on people.”
“It’s the only way you’ll get good at it,” Tove said.
“I know, but . . .” I sighed. “Maybe I don’t want to be good at it. I mean, controlling it, yes, I want to be good at that. But I don’t want to be able to use mind control on anyone. Even bad people. It doesn’t feel right to me.”
“I understand that.” He sat up, crossing his legs underneath him as he turned to face me. “But learning to harness your power isn’t a bad thing.”
“I’m stronger than Duncan, right?”
“Yes, of course.” Tove nodded.
“Then why is Duncan guarding me?” I asked. “If I’m more powerful.”
“Because he’s more expendable,” Tove replied simply. I must’ve looked appalled, because Tove hurried to explain. “That’s the way the Queen sees it. The way Trylle society sees it. And . . . if I’m being really honest, I agree with them.”
“You can’t really believe that my life has more value simply because I’m a Princess?” I asked. “The trackers are living in squalor, and we expect them to die for us.”
“They’re not living in squalor, but you’re right. The system is totally messed up,” Tove said. “Trackers are born into a lifetime of debt simply because they’re born here, and not left somewhere out in the world collecting an inheritance. They are indentured servants, which is just a polite name for slaves. And that is not right at all.”
It wasn’t until Tove said it that I realized that’s exactly what it was. The trackers were little more than slaves. I felt sick.
“But you do need guards,” Tove went on. “Every leader in the free world has bodyguards of some kind. Even pop stars have them. It’s not a horrible thing.”
“Yes, but in the free world, the bodyguards are hired. They choose it,” I said. “They’re not forced.”
“You think Duncan was forced? Or Finn?” Tove asked. “They both volunteered for this. Everyone did. Protecting you is a great honor. Besides that, living in the palace is a sweet deal.”
“I don’t want anyone getting hurt over me,” I said and looked directly at him.
“Good.” His mouth curled up into a smirk. “Then learn to defend yourself. Move the tarp.”
I stood up, preparing to conquer the tarp once and for all, but a blaring siren interrupted everything.
“You hear that, right?” Tove asked, cocking his head at me.
“Yeah, of course!” I shouted to be heard over it.
“Making sure it wasn’t just me,” Tove said.
That made me wonder what it sounded like inside his head. I knew he heard things everybody else didn’t hear, but if that included things like blaring sirens, I understood why he always seemed so distracted.
“What is that?” I asked.
“Fire alarm, maybe?” Tove shrugged and stood up. “Let’s go check it out.”
I put my hands over my ears and followed him out of the ballroom. We’d barely made it out into the hallway when the alarm stopped blaring, but my ears kept ringing. We were in the south wing, where business was conducted, and a few of the Queen’s associates were out in the hall, looking around.
“Why is that blasted thing going off?” Elora shouted from the front hall. Her words echoed from inside my head too, and I hated how she did that mind-speak thing when she was angry.
I couldn’t hear the answer to her question, but there was definitely a commotion going on. Grunting, yelling, slamming, fighting. Something was going down in the rotunda. Tove kept walking without hesitation, so I picked up my pace.
“Where did you find him?” Elora asked, but this time I couldn’t hear her inside my head. But we were close enough to the front hall that she sounded quite loud.
“He was hanging around the perimeter,” Duncan said, and I hurried at the sound of his voice. I wasn’t sure what he’d gotten himself into, but it couldn’t be good. “He’d knocked out one of the guards when I saw him.”
When I reached the front hall, Elora was standing halfway down the curved staircase. She had on a long dressing gown, so I assumed she’d been lying down with another one of
her migraines when the alarm went off. Rubbing her temple, she surveyed the room with her usual disdain.
The front doors were still wide open, letting an early snowfall blow in. A group of guards were in a struggle in the center of the rotunda, and the wind gusted in, shaking the chandelier above them. Duncan stood off to the side, much to my relief, because the fight did not seem to be going well.
At least five or six guards were trying to tackle someone in the middle. A couple of the guards were really huge muscular dudes too, and they couldn’t seem to get a handle on this guy. I couldn’t get a good look at him because he kept slipping between them.
“Enough!” Elora shouted, and a pain pierced my skull.
Tove put both his hands to his head, pressing against it hard, and continued to do so even after the pain in my head stopped.
The guards backed off as Elora commanded, leaving ample room for the guy in the center, and I finally saw what all the fuss was about. His back was to me, but he was the only troll I’d seen with hair that light.
“Loki?” I said, more surprised than anything, and he turned to me.
“Princess.” He gave me a lopsided smirk, and his eyes sparkled.
“You know him?” Elora asked, her words dripping with venom.
“Yeah. I mean, no,” I said.
“Come, now, Princess, we’re old friends.” Loki winked at me. He turned to Elora, attempting to give her his most winning smile, and spread his arms wide. “We’re all friends here, aren’t we, Your Highness?”
Elora narrowed her eyes at him, and Loki suddenly collapsed to his knees. He made a horrible guttural sound and clenched his stomach.
“Stop!” I yelled and ran toward him. At the same time, the front door slammed shut and the chandelier above shook.
Elora took her eyes off him to glare at me, but fortunately, she didn’t cause me to writhe in pain. I stopped before I reached Loki. He’d doubled over, his forehead resting against the marble floor. I could hear him gasping for breath, and he turned his head away from me so I couldn’t see how much pain he was in.
“Why on earth would I stop?” Elora asked. She had one hand on the banister, and her knuckles grew white as her grip tightened. “This troll was trying to break in. Isn’t that right, Duncan?”
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