I did not know I was coming to the U.S. until a few months shy of my departure date. I was excited and sad at the same time. Leaving your dad and family behind to go somewhere you have never been to before is no easy task.
When you were still in Africa, what did you imagine America was like? What did you think of America, and Americans?
From what I saw in the movies, I didn’t believe America was real. To put it into perspective: as an African, I saw America as most Americans see Hogwarts school in the Harry Potter movie/book series. I thought it was amazing, very cool, unreachable, and I dreamed of living there, but I also did not completely believe it was real.
How long does it take to travel to Africa?
It takes about 24 hours. Typically you have two stops and then you’re there. The flights are long, and you watch a lot of movies to get through it, but, if you have friends with you, it’s not too bad. But, prepare for serious jet-lag!
Zoo animals are sometimes stereotypically of African-origin, like zebras, giraffes, lions, etc. What are the zoos in Africa like?
We really don’t have zoos. With the animals, they do not bother you and you do not bother them. People seem to think Africans have their houses built next to where animals like lions, tigers, and all other zoo animals usually live— no, never! That is like intentionally building your house next to a dragon’s lair, or a serial killer. We live in our own area and the animals live in theirs. You will see the usual snakes, lizards, and others, but those are pretty hard to avoid, even in some parts of America.
What are your favorite types of African food?
I can’t decide. I love all African food! It might look gross, and the smell might not be the best, but—gosh!—does it taste amazing! Not only does it taste good, but it’s incredibly good for you. Most African foods are lots of vegetables and fruits and healthy grains; we don’t eat a whole lot of meat. I am sorry that some people don’t enjoy the look of the food, but you are missing out if you have an African friend and you never eat at their house at least one time.
I
SLAND CHAPTERS.
Introduction.
“Why shoot for the moon? There are already footprints there.
Instead, shoot for the sun. You may never make it, but at least
you’ll go farther than any other man has before you.”
Dear Reader,
The following is a short collection of miscellaneous chapters that I could not find a place for in the previous storyline. As such, I consider this, Island Chapters, to be a small book within a book, a diary of asides written between the tedious yet fulfilling labor of love entitled African in America.
Here you will find short stories revolving around the two countries I consider my far-separated loves: Africa and the United States of America. But, these are not only stories. More than that, they are my observations and experiences within these places, they are my thoughts recorded while living within the walls of these two houses, and the things—the cultures, the peoples, the mentalities—which surround them and make them what they are to me: home.
I give fair warning: these chapters are not for the stubbornly opinionated. They are not for those who would choose to defend one country or another to their dying breath. They are not intended to set one house against another, one culture of people against another, one place above another.
Unlike African in America, Island Chapters is not a chronological record of events of my life up until the publication of this work. These chapters are, simply, the descriptions of what my eyes have seen, what my ears have heard, and the recollection of the life that I have experienced being a part of both of these beautiful places.
I invite you, Reader, to journey with me, to taste the flavors of my thoughts and step down the roads that I have travelled. I offer Island Chapters to you as a blessing and a gift, and, with it the fervent hope that it will fill you with warm understanding.
Most Sincerely,
Wen.
Island Chapters: In the U.S.A.
CHAPTER 1:
Inappropriate Sense of Accomplishment.
"We gave you unemployment, affirmative action, and a black president. You can't call me racist."
That's what one of my former classmates said to me. It amazes me how blind some people are. The statement above and phrases like "I have black friends" and (my personal favorite) "I voted for Obama", are some of the more common excuses I hear when a person, in their own mind, believe they aren’t racist.
The mentality in America is such that people go to sleep at night feeling they have accomplished something and then wake up the next morning only to go about their day, fully unaware that some of the things they might do or say could be construed as racist. This is mannerism is most obvious in high school and college students. Students around me, mostly those who have not been exposed often to African-Americans, do things which shock me. I don’t understand how they don’t see a problem with the way they behave.
Racism has become a joke. But the truly funny thing about it is that it does not stop with joking. I have never felt so out of place as I have in my two months of living in Florida. African-Americans down here are left out and sometimes treated as if they're not good enough for society. When I hang out with my white friends I sometimes feel that I'm not good enough or on their level. The things they say and get away with… I know if I did the same, I would be called out or shamed for it.
Now, I’d like to examine the points my former classmate brought up:
Unemployment. Just another program put in place by the government that is typically associated with African-Americans. People have grown to believe that only African-Americans use this service and that they use it because they are a bunch of lazy people who would rather sit around and get free money than go out in the world and work for it. Both of these beliefs that we, as a society, have formed are wrong.
First and foremost, black Americans do not use the unemployment service more than white Americans do. The numbers between groups are almost even. Knowing this, how could a person say that African-Americans are lazy because they rely on welfare? If that were true then white Americans would be equally lazy, maybe even lazier, because they live in a society where they seem to have the upper hand.
Affirmative Action. This was something passed to help kill racism and push the integration of African-Americans into the work force. Despite all good intentions, not only is it ineffective at doing what it was designed to do, but it is also being put on trial by a young woman who feels African-Americans are given the upper-hand because of it!
The fact is that Affirmative Action is not as effective as people (or governments) think it is. The educational system still doesn't favor any ethnicity, whether white, black, or otherwise. The work environment has not changed much since the implication of this bill. African-Americans are still not getting jobs they deserve because of their skin color; they are being put on the back burner of society's expectations, like my mother was when she was passed over for the promotion in favor of a less experienced white woman. If a black person and a white person go to a job interview with the same resume, it is my experience that the black applicant is less likely to get the job, even if the Caucasian were less qualified. This glitch is apparent to me in so many ways, both in experience and in observation, and it makes me wonder if the institutions of Affirmative Action truly work or if something else needs to be put in place so that people can be treated more equally.
One result of the misconceptions about the Affirmative Action and Unemployment programs is an uneducated, resentful, and angry society. Another is that people have an inappropriate sense of accomplishment: those who under-accomplish or who cannot accomplish their goals due to societal restrictions and mentalities are accused of not wanting to accomplish anything, while those who do accomplish their goals may not have even earned it in the first place.
We have a long way to go as a society. When we finally learn that we must work together to better ourselves and
our community as a whole, we will truly begin to feel accomplished.
CHAPTER 2:
Never Alone.
Loneliness is underrated.
In our modern age, with cell phones, text messaging, Facebook, Twitter, and other social feeds, we are never alone. Ever. The younger generation is more dependent on their “connected” devices than seems healthy and older generations’ dependency is slowly catching up. Individuals seem to need constant contact and, when they don’t have it, feel left out or like something isn’t right with the world. Even then, during those quiet moments, it’s so easy to distract oneself by turning on the television or listening to music, whether through a phone, computer, radio, iPod, or other listening device. Modern day teens are left at the hands of social networks or music to get them through rough patches.
Between music and constant communication with one another, people (especially young people) are left spending very little time by themselves, in their own head. This means problems get ignored, and that means they are left to grow, uncontrolled, like weeds in a neglected garden. Those problems may eventually grow to a point of such disaster that the person is thrown into a panic, perhaps leading to break downs of relationships that were already fragile because they hung by the thin web of wireless Wi-Fi connections. As those relationships crumble, a person who has depended on those modern “social” devices suddenly find themselves feeling lost; they become repressed, withdrawn, posting sad “woe to me” statuses on their social networking pages. This lasts for however long is necessary for that person’s problems to either (1) disappear, (2) be properly dealt with as they should have been in the first place, or (3) take over their lives.
It’s typical for people, while wading in their problems and left alone, to resort to listening to music to help them move through and past any current emotions. They don’t talk to friends (and I mean really talk, not text—texting is not having a conversation!), they don’t consult with family (because face-to-face conversations have become almost passé); young people don’t communicate. Instead, they listen to songs that relate to their feelings. They’ll look for music lyrics to tell them what to do: how to break up a relationship, how to react to a bad situation, how they should feel about this or that thing happening to them. Young generations have outsourced their emotional resources to musicians they don’t know—musicians who don’t know them—so when they're sad they listen to sad songs until they find a way to move beyond the feelings.
The human body once was able to create for itself the perfect emotions to aid its survival. Where once our bodies were manufacturing adrenaline to encourage us to get moving, now we have to blast loud, pumped up music to get us excited. Now that music substitutes for our “emotional muscle”, those muscles have atrophied, leaving us almost completely unable to accurately deal with emotional issues without assistance.
We, as a society, are emotionally handicapped. As we move forward, this disability will only grow to an even bigger problem. Kids who do not know how to handle their problems without a crutch like social media or musical medication… well, one can imagine how there will be some serious emotionally-based issues bubbling up and, for those unaware of the current crisis, the problem will seem to bubble up out of nowhere.
In college I see students demonstrating this behavior 24/7: when doing homework, working out, or simply walking alone. If I were to see just one young adult doing any of these tasks without texting on a phone or listening to music at the same time it would be an anomaly. The need to be surrounded by friends or music is lifeblood to young adults, and to some older ones. The danger for losing the emotional muscle is even greater in younger children.
It’s frightening to think, if social networks and “instant music gratification” were taken away, and if people were forced to listen to their own thoughts and socialize face-to-face, how society would get along at all.
CHAPTER 3:
Discrimination and Learned Helplessness.
The society we are living in today has unconsciously created a place where learned helplessness is rampant in the streets. Have you ever wondered why people resort to drug dealing and other illegal crimes, all while knowing that they are risking their freedom? It is because we have created Learned Helplessness in the poorer neighborhoods. If you haven't a clue as to what Learned Helplessness is, let me explain.
Learned Helplessness is when a person feels that, no matter what they do, they will always fail. This can be seen when a child stops trying to succeed in school after receiving a few failed grades. That student has put their mind into a state of Learned Helplessness; they will no longer try to succeed because they believe they are destined to always fail.
Now, in society at large, the process works the same way. If you have ever gone to a very ghetto public school you will realize how little some students try, while others succeed. I fell into the trap of Learned Helplessness when I was a freshman in high school. After constantly hearing my mom telling me about how she was being discriminated against and mistreated at her job I began to wonder, why bother working hard when I will only end up being tossed aside? My mother didn’t get the promotion she applied for because she was black, even though she had worked there for five years and was a top performer. The next day a Caucasian woman who had worked there for two months, who was less qualified and who was trained by my mom, got the job over her. This event was enough to create a state of helplessness in my mind. I started believing that, if I wanted to go anywhere in life, I would have to find my own way and not waste my time down a path (specifically, the school path) that is not meant for “my kind”.
I believe it is because of Learned Helplessness that many African-Americans do not succeed in the current educational system. They hear stories of their parents being oppressed in their place of work (or they experience it themselves) and that creates a mentality of Learned Helplessness, which further pushes the person away from the educational system. That's also why sports and music are so popular in the African-American community; that is how many have escaped the ‘hood; sports and music act as proven tracks to success and fame, a path where African-Americans aren’t discriminated against in. It is why crime and other illegal activities are used among some blacks as the alternative to academic success. The drug industry, while a less socially acceptable field, is another indiscriminating area of financial freedom.
Following my mother’s rejection, she not only started her own business and became her own success, but her determined ambition saved me from my own Learned Helplessness. For me, her determination and achievement gave me the hope I needed to break away. I realized that, on the educational path, there was more than one way an African-American could prosper, but zero education was not the answer. My mom shone as a living example of how I could use my educational background, knowledge, and hard work to achieve greatness. She was able to walk away from her negative experience and create an even better future for herself. Because of her diligence, I overcame Learned Helplessness. But, sadly, I was lucky. Really lucky. Most kids aren’t able to pull out of Learned Helplessness. Stories like ours—my mother’s and mine—are rare in the ghettos of society, and that’s the reason why America doesn’t see its ghettos shrinking fast enough.
For crime to decrease and for society to be able to work together and succeed as a whole, discrimination most go. America can kill two birds with one stone! We can be an example of a Utopia, where all people are treated equally. If such a mentality were adopted across the board, it could slowly but surely kill crime. The absence of discrimination would create a place where education is valued even more than it is today; we would have a truly unique and well-educated population, capable of unlimited advancements in science, technology, medicine and any other field imaginable; minds would be free to press against the limits of academia. Laws like Affirmative Action would go dead because we would be all equal, and programs like Unemployment would fade away.
Now, I realize everything I am saying here is very unlikely t
o happen. There is a preconceived notion floating about that we, as human beings, are destined to be at odds with one another. But, just for a moment, imagine how great America could be if we worked together! I encourage you to think about that the next time you see someone being discriminated against.
We can be the first steps to a real life Utopia.
CHAPTER 4:
No More Self-Control.
Talking points:
Sex at a young age is becoming more common.
Diets are less successful due to lack of control.
Excuses for everything are always made for why something is or isn’t done (i.e. failing a class, cheating in life, and much more).
No more dedication to commitments (i.e. marital, professional, financial).
Overall social downfall.
We seem to be turning into a world of weak commitments and zero self-control. It’s common to see or hear of people looking for ways to lose weight without actually doing the work, like reducing caloric intake and taking time away from the television to exercise. They want to eat what they want and do what they want, all while getting the results they want. Essentially, having their cake and eating it, too! While excuses are nothing new, people today try the easy way out of situations and make more excuses than generations prior have.
College students are the prime example of what the problem is with our generation. The amount of sexual activity that happens without commitment is unreal. More people are becoming “friends with benefits” than ever before and, where once the stereotype was that only men cheated, girls are now more commonly cheating on their boyfriends. It seems every year girls are getting "sluttier" and boys are getting hornier. What does that mean for relationships? Well, that answer can be seen by the rise in the divorce rate and the number of non-married couples living together. Conventional marriage seems to be going downhill, fast.
African in America Page 12