I take a deep breath. Walk up to him. Tap him on the shoulder. “Weldon, it’s okay. I’m here.”
Still nothing.
Heat trickles down my spine. I spin him around. Suppress the wave of pain that strikes me the moment I realize he’s crying and hold tightly onto his arms. “Weldon, this isn’t you. Wake up. Come back with me.”
He’s not even looking at me, and I realize words aren’t going to work. They never do with him, so I shove him once. Twice. Too many times to count, yelling his name. Screaming out about every wall I ran through just to get to him.
“Doesn’t that mean something to you? You said you had my back! You said we were in this together! Wake up! Wake UP! WAKE UP!”
Anger and heartache spill past my lips. Cram inside my brain until I can’t think straight. Can’t see straight. Can’t see past the need to get my friend back.
Without thinking, I lift his chin, lock eyes with him, and then swing.
My hand never reaches his cheek. My eyes flick open.
“I’d call this spousal abuse, but we aren’t technically married to one another,” he says with a tired, forced grin.
My emotions flicker back to life. “Weldon!” I shout, throwing my arms around his neck.
He pulls me close, burying his face in my neck. “When we get home, we’re going to have to talk about your anger issues. It’s not healthy—”
“Shut up,” I say, laughing through watery eyes. “I thought you were lost to me.”
“Nah. Just taking a mini-vacation,” he says, trying to joke. But I hear the pain in his voice. The embarrassment. He sets me down and takes one look around the room. “I’d say we’re in a bit of a pickle.”
“Think bigger.”
“Eggplant?”
“We’re locked in a room somewhere underground, waiting for Bael and Clara to summon us so I can break the Unholy Seal, and then be used to awaken Mourdyn,” I say quickly, flipping my emotions back off.
Weldon drags in a breath, trying to digest everything. “Then we’re in Australia.”
“Australia?”
“Did you not look at the map, mouse? That’s where the Unholy Seal is,” he says.
“So then we can’t count on the others being here in time.”
“In time for what?”
“For when I shut this shit down,” I say fiercely.
“And how do you plan on doing that?”
“I’m going to destroy the Exanimator. Just like Evangeline said.”
“And I’m going to finally invent that time machine I’ve been working on,” he says sarcastically.
I blink.
His face shifts when he realizes I’m not kidding. “Look, we all know that there’s a fine line between being mental with a death wish and being brave and, most days, I’m all for playing limbo with it… Just not today. Not here, under these circumstances.” He runs his hand through his hair. “And I hate to be the buzzkill, but even if I did want to give it a go, we still don’t know how to destroy it. Seamus never got back to us with those cliff notes.”
I bite my lip and look away, knowing he’s right. “We can’t give up now. We’re already here.”
He huffs, knowing I’m as right as he is. There isn’t an easy way to do this.
“I can shadow walk out of here and bring them back,” he says a moment later.
“No. We don’t have time for that, and I don’t know what’s out there yet.”
“Hell, Faye. That’s what’s out there. We can’t do this alone. I told you that before.”
“And we can’t bring them here to their death! At least if we go alone, we won’t have as many to account for.”
He grabs me by the shoulders, forcing me to look at him. “Mouse, I know you’re scared. I am too. But we need them. We need their backup. I’m going.”
And just like that, he lets go of me, turns, and disappears into a shadow.
I look up at the camera, focusing all my energy on keeping the spell intact. Keeping them seeing me sitting here staring hopelessly at the door.
“Hurry up, Weldon,” I mutter to myself.
A second later, Weldon returns with Jaxen, Jezi, Gavin, and Cassie. “Should I go back for the wolves?” he asks Jaxen.
“No,” Jaxen says as he pulls me up into a hug. He doesn’t waste any time asking, “Are you okay?” His eyes frantically scan my face.
I hurriedly nod, feeling torn into a million pieces. Happy, relieved, scared, sad, worried… they don’t mesh well and it makes me restless.
“They’re going to be pissed if he doesn’t, bro,” Gavin says. “Especially Mom.”
“It doesn’t matter because we’re not staying here,” Jaxen says flatly.
“What do you mean?” I ask, pulling back from him. “We can’t leave now. We have to finish it. We’re already here.”
“Faye, there are things you don’t understand. Things you haven’t been told, that I don’t have time to explain right now,” he says impatiently.
His words are a shovel, digging holes in my stomach. “What do you mean?”
His face is so pale. I don’t know why I didn’t notice it a moment ago. Didn’t see the dark circles hanging under his sad, green eyes.
“What happened?” I ask, surprised I got the words out.
The words won’t seem to form for him, no matter how much he moves his mouth.
“Seamus returned. He got the information we needed,” Cassie offers up.
“It’s the Exanimator, Faye. The only way you can destroy it is if the Everlasting merges with it. Your power is too great for the machine to absorb. It would implode,” Jezi says for Jaxen. “It was created by a Divine gene, and it has to end by one. You.”
He isn’t looking at me. His eyes are on my shoulder. His mind is light-years away from me.
I don’t know what to say. Don’t know what to think. But I know what I feel.
“If that’s how it’s supposed to end, then that’s how it’s supposed to end,” I push out.
Jaxen locks eyes with me. “No.”
This is a fight he won’t bend for.
“The Darkyns have to be stopped,” I say dutifully. “I can end this. I know I can.”
“I don’t care,” he says, anger rippling through his features. He isn’t happy with me. Not with the decisions I’ve made, and not with the decision I’m about to make.
But this is war and, just like Weldon said, there’s no place for love in it.
“Jaxen—” I start to say, but then we both turn when we hear footsteps outside the door. “They’re coming.”
“What do we do?” Cassie asks, hands held out mechanically.
“Weldon, shadow walk us out. Now!” Jaxen orders, grabbing my hand.
But there’s no time for it. The door swings open.
ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE.
Bael enters the room with Clara and Edgar behind him, and the moment it registers just who’s with me, magic starts flying like meteors falling from the sky. I absorb the energy from the magic flowing all around and use it to blast them all backward, giving us enough leeway to make it out the door.
“Weldon, do you think you can find the doorway to the Underground from here?” I ask as we all jet down the hall, trying to put as much distance between Bael and us as possible. Jaxen hands me a bag stuffed with weapons, knowing there’s no time to beg me to go back. Not now.
“Yeah. Follow me,” Weldon says, taking the lead.
We take lefts and rights and run into a handful of demons who are taken out with fluxes. Bael’s angered yells of frustration echo down the halls, following us, and I almost imagine them forming into actual beings that will hunt us down.
“We’re close,” Weldon says as we come up to the end of another long, white hallway. He stops in front of a door and turns. “There are a dozen demons on the other side. They guard the door that leads to the Underground.”
“We can take them,” Gavin says, unblinking.
“But through that door, s
hadow hounds protect the small doorway left open by Mourdyn and Bael’s deal. It’s an invitation-only thing… just like our plane,” Weldon says.
“Can we get in?” Gavin asks, searching Weldon’s gaze.
“It won’t be easy, but yeah… I think we can.”
“Then let’s go,” I say, ready for whatever lies ahead. I drop my bag, pack on as many weapons as I can fit on my body, and then stand, ready.
Jaxen’s hand stops mine. “We can’t do this.”
I look up at him. I don’t have to say anything. He knows that we can’t go back. Knows that trying to keep me safe is impossible. This is what I was meant to do. This is who I am, and I watch as understanding drops like a thousand-pound weight on his heart.
He lets go of me, the emotions in his face drying up like an ocean. He’s shutting down. Building up his walls and shutting his emotions off. I wish I could stop him. Wish I had the determination I did once before to keep him from destroying himself, but I can’t focus on anything but this mission.
I can’t let anything come in between it this time. Not if I want to succeed.
Weldon pushes the door open and we rush in, fluxes raised, aiming for the sparkling stigmas hidden amongst layers and layers of tattooed skin. Demons evaporate into ash, one after the other, as we make our way through the room easily.
Almost too easily.
When the room is cleared, we turn and look at each other. Doubt and confusion is written in everyone’s gaze.
“Something feels off,” Jaxen says, turning to everyone.
“Keep moving,” I say, heading for the metal door across from me. I grab my last two fluxes and reach for the door just as clapping sounds behind us.
I don’t move at first. Just close my eyes, feeling every inch of my body fill with leaded hate. But it’s the silence after the realization that Bael is behind me that scares me the most. No one is moving. No one is acting.
Something isn’t right.
I slowly turn and feel the world shift off its axis the moment I do, because standing in front of me, arms tied behind their backs, are my mom and dad. My eyes rush over them, searching every minute detail. Her watery, bluish-gray eyes… they aren’t as bright as they once were. They’re hollow, outlined in deep purple circles. Her cinnamon hair that once glowed like honey when the sun hit the silken strands just right, are now ratted and matted to the sides of her sunken-in, ashen cheeks. This person is not the mother I knew. She’s a warrior, shown the horrors of battle.
His once sandy-blond hair is now a mixture of browns and reds. Blood, coating and matting it down. One of his eyes is swollen shut, covered in plum bruises that I fear have stained his skin permanently. His square jaw doesn’t hold the strength it once did before, and it’s taking every ounce of courage that I have to keep from turning away. To keep from curling up into a ball and crying.
“If any one of you so much as thinks about trying something, they both die, got it?” Bael says, his smirk eating up his entire face.
“Faye!” my mom says as she tries to reach out for me.
“Can it!” Clara says as she strikes my mother hard across the face.
Hate blurs my vision.
I take a step forward, but Bael’s finger is up in the air as he moves to stand directly behind my dad. “Ah. Ah. Ahhh,” he clicks through his teeth. “Don’t push me.”
He won’t kill them. He can’t. They’re all he has over me. He won’t. I won’t let him.
“I’ve tried being diplomatic with you, Everlasting,” he says, sounding almost like a parent scolding a child. “But it seems you want to do things the hard way.”
Clara looks almost cheerful, almost like she’s floating on a cloud that can’t be punctured. She doesn’t have to say anything. It’s in her eyes. Her smile.
She won.
Both of my parents are staring at me with strength in their eyes. Layers of blood, fresh and old, stain their skin. They’re remarkably thinner. Painfully pale. But they’re here, in the flesh, and I can’t look away from them. I don’t want to. Ever again.
“Again, I’m surprised by your logic,” Bael continues, his gaze searing my face. “I can’t fathom how you could possibly think you could get around my turf without consequence.”
“Blind determination,” Clara answers for him. Smugly.
Bael quirks his head to the side. “You know, I feel as if you don’t take me seriously, and I don’t think I like how that feels.”
“You have feelings?” Weldon asks.
Bael’s eyes snap in Weldon’s direction, but his words are aimed at me. “Enough games.”
With a snap of his fingers, we’re surrounded, once again, by demons. Rings of demon fire circle around our bodies like cages. With a shove, we’re pushed forward, following Bael’s hard, hurried steps. I keep my eyes pinned on my parents’ backs, not wanting them to leave my sight.
“Faye, they’re going to make you break the Unholy Seal,” Jaxen says to my mind.
“I know.”
“You have no choice.”
“I know.”
“No one will blame you,” Jezi cuts in.
“Even if they did, I don’t care. I can’t lose them. Not again.”
“When you have the Dagger of Retribution, use it, Faye,” Weldon adds. “Just like last time, there will be commotion when the machine breaks. We can use that to our advantage. Go for Bael.”
“Okay,” I say, etching his words into my brain.
“I’ll make sure your parents are safe,” Jaxen says assuredly, reclaiming the demons that have haunted him from his past mistakes.
“In here,” Bael says as he pushes a door open.
Sure enough, there’s the Unholy Seal stationed across the room, along with the seven leaders of the Darkyn Coven. Thomas is standing in front, hands crossed in front of him. He’s the only Witch with his hood pushed back.
“We meet again,” he says with a snarl.
“Call the Dagger of Retribution to you,” Bael says quickly.
I close my eyes and summon the Dagger to manifest in my hands. The weight of it seems so light compared to the destruction it’s about to cause to life as we know it.
The others are moved in behind me, watching me. I hear my parents struggling. Hear Jaxen’s quiet resolve that I’m sure is forewarning the others of what’s to come.
“Well, get on with it!” Clara says from behind me. Thirst crowds her words.
The Darkyn Leaders part just enough to let me through to the machine, but not enough to give me space to breathe. Their magic is overpowering, pulsing against my ears like a soundless electromagnetic wave I want to tap into. But how can I, when they have everyone I love in this room held up? I could try to level the place, but what if something goes wrong and someone pays for my mistake?
I can’t be rash in my decisions.
I count the steps to the machine, focusing on breathing to keep from draining everyone I hate in this room. The machine is exactly like the Holy Seal. I swallow thickly, wishing I could shuck off my jacket, and then slide the blade through the allotted hole and twist. After pulling the levers, the machine stutters to a stop. I count the seconds in between the silence, waiting for the commotion to begin so I can make my move.
But it never comes.
“That’s it?” Bael says.
“We’ve spelled the area to keep its structure. After the catastrophe at the church, we knew what we’d be up against,” Thomas says with a gloating smile.
I meet eyes with Jaxen. Feel my blood leaving my body. His eyes are two spheres of panic that lodge themselves in my throat.
“Oh well. If the show won’t come to us, then we must bring the show,” Bael says. “Everlasting, please come forward.”
My feet are two cinder blocks that won’t budge.
“Please, do hurry. I have other matters to attend to, and I’d like to get this over with as quickly as possible.”
“Get what over with?” I ask hesitantly.
�
��My word is my bond and, when I make a deal, I intend for the other to keep it,” he says as if I should have already known that. “You didn’t respect that, therefore, a price must be paid.”
“I haven’t broken your deal,” I say carefully, blankly.
“On the contrary, you have. My way. In return for their safety, you were to do things my way, and my way wasn’t spelling the camera and crashing our deal with a handful of your friends. Something has to be done about it. You’re on my territory now and, down here, when someone breaks their word, a price is paid.”
My heart hammers in my ears. My pulse beats in my fingertips. “I’ll go with you. I won’t try anything again.”
He closes his eyes. Shakes his head. “It doesn’t work that way.”
“What do you want?” I ask, scared.
“For you to choose.”
“Choose?”
A smile starts at the corner of his mouth, small at first, and then widens as he looks down at my parents. “Yes. Choose who lives and who dies.”
I THOUGHT I KNEW HORROR on a personal level.
I was wrong.
Clara grabs my mom by the arms and drags her up to her feet. Edgar does the same with my dad.
I’m gagging on fear. Choking on resentment. A million scenarios play out in my head, and not a single one offers a solution. Offers a comfort to help us out of this mess.
“Look at it this way,” Bael says as my parents struggle against being held. “I’m bargaining with you because I like you. I could kill them both.”
I feel Jaxen tense. Anticipate his next move before maybe even he does, and I hold my hand up, stopping him. Stopping any of them.
“I said I’ll go with you,” I say desperately. “I’ve realized how right you are. Just please… don’t make me do this.”
I’m looking at my mom. The same woman who slept on the floor next to me every single time I was sick. Who kissed away my aches and pains, and I know that I can’t lose her. Not again. And at my dad, who never… not even once, believed that I would be less than I am. Who slayed the imaginary monsters in my closet night after night.
And I feel the world crumbling, chunk by chunk, breaking off into irredeemable pieces.
“I… can’t. I won’t,” I choke out, seeing the world through a blurry haze. I can’t blink fast enough to clear the ever-present tears that won’t seem to go away. That keeps me from really seeing my parents.
Everlost (The Night Watchmen Series Book 3) Page 34