by Anne Herries
‘Nicolas…is something the matter?’
He did not answer, but a little snore told her that he was fast asleep. She went closer and caught the smell of strong drink. He was drunk!
Lottie was shocked. She had never known Nicolas to drink too much and it made her feel very guilty. She had failed him and he had been driven to drink to get away from her. Or perhaps he had felt trapped because she had shown him too clearly that she was in love with him.
‘I am sorry, dearest,’ she said and went to remove his boots. They came off with a series of sharp tugs. He stirred once and muttered something but she continued to pull them off and then went to cover him with a light blanket. ‘Forgive me…’
‘Damn it, Elizabeth,’ he muttered. ‘You knew I adored you—why didn’t you tell me? I suppose it doesn’t matter if you break hearts…’
Lottie drew back, feeling as if he had thrust a dagger into her heart. Here at last was the key to that bleak look she saw sometimes in his eyes. He was still in love with Elizabeth—and she had obviously hurt him very badly when they parted. Lottie had been told right at the start by both Bertie and Henrietta that Nicolas had once been madly in love, but she had put it out of her mind. Now she felt as if she had been doused in cold water.
It was little wonder that he felt trapped by his marriage. He had wanted to marry Elizabeth, but she had broken his heart and he had sought comfort in the arms of various mistresses. He had married for the sake of an heir, but Elizabeth was the woman he dreamed of and regretted even now. Lottie would be a fool if she hoped that one day he would love her.
She went back into her own room and sat down on the edge of her bed. Her heart felt as if it were breaking, but she refused to cry. Nicolas had never promised to love her. She had mistaken his kindness for something more and that was her fault, not his.
She got into bed and shut her eyes. Tears were trickling down her cheeks. She could no longer control them. It was useless. Her honeymoon had been so very pleasant that she had been lulled into a false security, believing that Nicolas was ready to settle to marriage. Now she understood why he never could.
No wonder he had not cared who he married. He was still suffering from his blighted hopes and did not care who he took to wife.
All he wanted was an heir and Lottie had failed to provide him with that small thing. No wonder he wished to return to Rothsay. He would probably be off to London soon after they arrived.
Lottie was feeling tired when the carriage pulled up outside the house. Nicolas had ridden his horse for most of the time. She had hardly seen him other than the night they had spent at the inn or when they had stopped for refreshment. He was polite and concerned for her well being, but had made no attempt to kiss or touch her. Of course, there was no chance of making an heir while she had her courses. If she had needed confirmation of what she meant to him, this was it.
Lottie had cried herself to sleep for two nights, but now she felt numb. She had decided that the best defence was to keep her distance, be polite, as he was, but reserved. Inside, she was hurting, but she had no intention of letting Nicolas see that he had broken her heart.
She got down from the carriage with a sigh of relief. Now they were home they need not be forever in each other’s company. Indeed, she thought it might be less painful if he took himself off to London. Every time she looked at him she was reminded of the way his lips felt on hers, or the touch of his hand, the feel of him inside her, giving her such pleasure.
‘You will forgive me if I do not come in with you, Lottie,’ Nicolas said. ‘I must speak to the bailiff and I dare say you will enjoy an hour or so to chat with your aunt.’
‘Yes, certainly I shall,’ she said. ‘Please, Nicolas, you must do just as you wish. I am perfectly capable of finding something to do—especially now that we are home. I have it in mind to do something for the children of our tenants.’
‘Freddie said something about a school,’ Nicolas said and smiled for the first time in days. ‘I approve of the idea, but hope you do not intend to teach them yourself?’
‘Certainly not, though I might have enjoyed it had I not had other duties. I shall employ a young man to teach them. I am certain there must be suitable young men of good education in need of such work.’
‘I am certain there must.’ Nicolas laughed suddenly. ‘I think I have been abominably rude to you these past two days, Lottie. Please forgive me, if you can?’
‘There is nothing to forgive. I understand, Nicolas.’
‘Do you?’
‘I dare say you found a diet of my company tedious. You will wish to be off with your friends again soon. Do not imagine I expect you to dance attendance on me all the time.’
‘Do you not?’ He frowned. ‘I see I have no need to apologise. I shall be late this evening, Lottie. Do not wait up for me.’
Now what had she said to upset him? Lottie was thoughtful as she went into the house. It seemed that there was no pleasing Nicolas in this mood.
Lottie spent a pleasant hour having tea with her aunt. She was told that the countess had gone home soon after they left for Rothsay’s hunting lodge, but she had written to Aunt Beth telling her that she intended to visit London in the very near future and inviting her to stay.
‘We got on very well,’ Aunt Beth said. ‘I am quite content here, Lottie—but should you wish to be private with Rothsay for a while I have a standing invitation from Lady Selby.’
‘You must visit her if you wish,’ Lottie said. ‘I have no intention of being private with Rothsay and you will be of help to me here, but I shall not deny you the pleasure of a visit to town.’
‘Well, I might go for a while later. The Season will be over by then, but I like to visit the theatre and too much racketing about is not for me—though of course there are always some hostesses who never entirely desert the capitol.’
‘Yes, I suppose there must be.’
Aunt Beth hesitated, then, ‘I had a visit from Clarice while you were away, Lottie.’
‘She came here to the house?’
‘She wore a hat with veiling. No one but I would have seen her face, Lottie. She asked me for money. I gave her ten pounds, but I think she hoped for far more.’
‘Yes, I dare say she did. She asked me for money before the wedding. I gave her twenty guineas.’
‘You must not make a habit of it, Lottie.’
‘No, but she is my sister. I cannot forget that we were close once—and, if it were not for her, I should never have met Rothsay.’
‘Well, I suppose there is that, but do not let her take advantage, dearest.’
‘No, I promise I shall not.’
After her aunt went up to rest before dinner, Lottie discovered that she was too restless to do the same and decided to go for a walk.
Clarice might be a problem in the future. She would never be satisfied with small handouts, but what else could Lottie do? The jewels she had been given were not truly hers to sell or give away—at least she would feel badly if she disposed of a wedding gift in order to pacify her sister. How could she look Uncle Freddie in the eye if she sold his necklace? Besides, even if she gave Clarice a thousand pounds, it was unlikely to be her last request.
Oh, bother, she would not let Clarice upset her!
She set out for the lake, enjoying the feel of the breeze in her hair. It was good to be home. She had come to think of Rothsay as her home and was content to spend her life here, though she might take Aunt Beth to visit Bath in the autumn for a few weeks.
Lottie stood staring at the opposite shore of the lake. There was an old summerhouse there, which Nicolas had told her had been shut up for years. Lottie wondered if it might be suitable for the school she was planning. The building looked sturdy enough. It was too far to explore further this evening, because she would be late changing for dinner, but in the morning she would see whether or not it would do. About to turn away, she thought she saw something at the window—a face or a flash of white.
&nbs
p; She was certain Nicolas had told her the building was locked, because he had mentioned the key being in the bailiff’s office, and she had planned to fetch it the next day. Perhaps it was just a trick of the light, and yet she could have sworn she had seen something.
She was thoughtful as she turned and walked back to the house. It was as she reached the rose arbour that someone came up behind her. She turned and saw Lily, her instincts telling her immediately that the seamstress was in some distress.
‘Lily—did you wish to speak to me?’
Lily hesitated, then, ‘Yes, my lady. Forgive me—I was wondering if you would help me? I need some money…’ She glanced over her shoulder, as if frightened of being overheard. ‘It is for Sam…he needs to get away, Miss Lottie. They have put a price on his head. I’ve seen the posters up everywhere. His price is fifty guineas. People will give him away. It is a fortune to most folk.’
‘Yes, of course, it must be,’ Lottie said. ‘He is hiding at the moment?’
‘Yes…’ Lily glanced back towards the lake and Lottie understood what she had seen earlier. Sam must be hiding out at the old summerhouse. He was in a very dangerous situation, because he could be discovered at any moment. ‘There’s someone who would help him get away to the coast. If he could find a ship and go to France he might be safe there.’
‘What about you?’
‘I shall stay here until he finds work and can send for me. I’ll work for you for nothing until I have paid back anything you give me.’
‘That would not be necessary…’ Lottie thought quickly. If she gave Lily money knowing that it was intended for a fugitive, she would be breaking the law—but Sam Blake had been unfortunate. She did not think he deserved a price on his head for what he had done. ‘Come to the house with me now, Lily. How much do you need?’
‘Would twenty guineas be too much?’ Lily looked doubtful. ‘I know it is a lot to ask…’
‘No, I can give you that quite easily,’ Lottie said. ‘You need not worry about paying me back, Lily. I had intended to make you a present for making my wedding gown so beautifully—and that will do very well. You may continue to work for me if you wish, but I had thought of helping you to set up a small establishment in Northampton, if you should like it?’
‘You are so generous. If things had been otherwise it is just what I should have liked—but Sam will send for me soon. I shall take the children and follow him to France just as soon as he is settled there.’
‘Then I can only wish you good luck. I am glad we returned in time to help you.’
Lily looked over her shoulder once more. ‘I know I shouldn’t have asked, but Sam is desperate. He says if they catch him he will hang for sure this time.’
‘Yes, I know. I am so sorry, Lily. It isn’t fair that he should be treated so harshly. I do not think his crime so very terrible.’
‘You are a good woman, my lady. There’s not many as care about folk like us. His lordship…’ She shook her head. ‘No, I shouldn’t say, but Sam says he’s a fool to trust that Larkin…’
‘What makes you say that, Lily?’
‘He’s the one been selling game to the inn, my lady. My Sam only did it the once when he were desperate. He needed medicine for me when I had the last babe—but mostly it was just a rabbit for the pot.’
‘Larkin is cheating my husband? Are you sure, Lily? And Sam can prove this?’
‘It’s only his word, miss. No one would listen to a convicted fugitive, would they?’
‘No, they wouldn’t. I am so sorry, Lily.’ Lottie felt pity for the woman and her husband, but there was little she could do other than to give her some money. ‘Come up to my room now and I shall give you the twenty guineas…’
Chapter Ten
Aunt Beth had gone to bed and Lottie was sitting in her favourite parlour reading when she heard the ring of hurried feet and then the door was flung open and Nicolas strode into the room. Raising her head to look at him, she saw that he was angry. She rose to her feet apprehensively.
‘Is something wrong?’
‘Do you know anything about this?’ He threw down a purse of something that clinked. It landed on the floor at her feet with a little thud. ‘Blake claims that you gave him the money—is it true?’
Lottie swallowed hard. ‘Has he been caught? Why couldn’t you have just let him go, Nicolas? He doesn’t deserve to be hung for stealing a few rabbits.’
‘It wasn’t just my rabbits. Bertie has lost deer and the game birds have been disappearing too fast to be the work of just one man. There is a gang of the rascals at work in the area.’
‘Sam Blake wasn’t one of them. He sold game only once when Lily was ill.’
‘I suppose she told you that?’ Nicolas glared at her. ‘And you believed her—and you gave her twenty guineas for Sam?’
‘Yes, I did.’ Lottie raised her head defiantly, meeting his furious gaze. ‘She told me something else, too—but I dare say you would not listen if I told you who was behind this outbreak of poaching?’
‘I would not believe anything Blake said—and you are a fool to believe his wife.’
‘I gave Lily the money as a present, but I knew she intended it for her husband. He was going to France and she was to join him once he had found work there.’
‘Very likely. The man was a lazy good-for-nothing and would never have done an honest day’s work.’
‘Was…’ Lottie shivered. She felt sick as she looked at her husband’s face. ‘Are you saying…what happened to him? You didn’t…?’
‘Larkin shot him. He was searched, questioned and told he was being taken to prison—he knocked a man down and ran off,’ Nicolas grated. A pulse flicked in his throat. ‘I am sorry, Lottie. I know you like his wife and you had sympathy for the man—but he would have hanged had we caught him. He was seen leaving the area of the lake and some of the keepers went after him. He was warned several times, but he continued to run and he was shot. I am afraid he was killed outright.’
‘No! How could you allow that?’ Lottie stared at him in horror. ‘I thought you had some compassion in you—how could you let your keeper murder a man just like that?’
‘I was not present or I would have stopped it. However, Larkin acted within the law. Blake had a price on his head, which meant he could be shot on sight. Larkin says he intended to wing him, but…the shot killed him instantly. He couldn’t have suffered.’
‘Lily and their children will suffer terribly,’ Lottie said. Her eyes stung with tears. ‘Larkin is the man who is taking your game, Nicolas. Sam Blake knew the truth. Larkin killed him to cover his crimes.’
‘That is ridiculous,’ Nicolas said, his mouth set in a harsh line. ‘You do not expect me to believe my own keeper is stealing from my neighbours and me?’
‘No, Rothsay, I do not expect you to believe it,’ Lottie said and raised her head proudly. ‘Yet I believe it—and in time you may, too. I just hope that nothing happens that makes you wish you had listened.’ She glanced down at the purse on the floor. ‘That money belongs to Lily Blake. She will need it if her children are not to starve.’
Leaving it lying on the floor, she walked past him and from the room, going upstairs to her room. Once alone, she sat on the bed, trying not to give way to her emotions.
How could Nicolas have allowed his keeper to kill a man just for the crime of stealing a few rabbits? If he thought that justice, then he was not the man she had thought she loved.
‘Damn you, Lottie.’ Nicolas caught her as she reached her bedroom door, following her inside. ‘I will not leave this there—nor shall I be made to feel in the wrong over this business with Blake. The man was a fool to fall in with hardened rogues—and Larkin was within the law to shoot him.’
‘Be damned to the law,’ Lottie said, rounding on him furiously. All caution was gone as her feelings reached boiling point. ‘Have you no compassion at all? I believed you a man of honour, but now I begin to think I was mistaken. You are not the man I thought I
was marrying.’
‘Indeed?’ Nicolas looked at her, his expression frosty. ‘I hardly think you are in a position to preach to me of morals, Lottie. You were ready to deceive me—to allow me to think you your sister. You are as much a schemer as she—perhaps worse, for at least she refused to be part of the deal.’
‘You forced me to keep the bargain.’ Lottie’s cheeks flamed with heat. She felt as if he had slapped her. ‘I confessed and begged you to let me go.’
‘You had chances enough to break it off. You need not have signed the contract. You knew I would have let you go then. Do not pretend otherwise.’
‘I thought I liked you,’ Lottie said. ‘I knew it would never be a love match—but at least I thought you would deal fairly with me. Now I am not sure that I like you at all.’
‘So, now we have the truth at last.’ His expression was dangerous, his eyes glittering with anger. ‘You married me because you had a fancy to be the marchioness, I suppose. I thought you very different from your sister, but it seems the difference is slight after all.’
‘Damn you!’ Lottie lashed out, striking him across the face with the palm of her hand. ‘Why don’t you go back to your mistress—or your precious Elizabeth? It is she you love, is it not?’
‘Who told you about Elizabeth?’ Nicolas’s face was white apart from the red mark where she had struck him. He reached for her, catching her wrist as she would have turned away, his fingers clasping her like a ring of iron. ‘Answer me, Lottie! Who has been feeding you these tales?’
She lifted her head proudly, refusing to let the tears fall. ‘I know that you could never love me,’ she said. ‘Let me go, Nicolas. You can seek a separation or a divorce if you prefer—but let’s stop this pretence now. You despise me and I—wish I had never met you.’
‘You are my wife whether you wish it or not—and I have no intention of seeking a divorce. You made a bargain and you will stick to it.’