Yes. Not that Cole was bad, per se. It’s just different with Pike. He’s in my head more than anyone’s ever been.
“Well, have fun,” she tells me, sauntering over to the fridge and removing a soda. “Just don’t get knocked up, okay?”
“Why?” I blurt out, but then I realize how that sounded. “I mean, not that I’m planning to. I’m nineteen.” I move over to her. “But you didn’t say that with any of my other boyfriends. Why Pike?”
“Because you’re having fun,” she says, closing the refrigerator and turning toward me. “And that might be all he’s having, too. Just be careful.”
The words kind of stab. Is she right? Is that all we’re doing?
“You get to enjoy a stable male who has a job and an active driver’s license at the same time,” she explains. “And he gets to have a hot, young girl in his bed. Enjoy it while it lasts. Until the cows come home.” She nudges my chin like I’m five. “Just don’t get your hopes up. Stay sharp.”
Don’t get my hopes up.
But I think they already skyrocketed when I wasn’t paying attention.
I smell the grill in the backyard, but I’m not hungry anymore.
Jordan
The following Thursday I have my summer class, and Pike lets me use his truck. He’s been catching a ride with Dutch to and from work all week, so I have a reliable vehicle to get around, and he even mentioned buying another car for himself under the guise that he should have something nicer for ‘going out’, but I know it’s just his excuse to get me in something better than the VW.
I refused. He almost has my car running, so I’ll make do with however much longer that will last and cross that bridge when I come to it again.
I pull up alongside the curb and park the truck out of the way, seeing Dutch and Pike in the driveway, working on my car. Actually, Pike is working on it, and Dutch is camped out in a nearby lawn chair with a beer in his hand.
I grab my backpack and stroll across the street and up our driveway.
“Hey, guys,” I chirp. “How’s it going?”
Pike glances over his shoulder at me, his eyes trailing up and down my body. I bite back my smile and so does he as he quickly turns back to work under the hood.
I woke up to his mouth trailing down my stomach at two o’clock this morning, ending between my legs and remaining there until I came twice.
And then we didn’t get back to sleep until four. The man has more energy than I can take, and I’m so tired today, but in the best way possible. Every inch of my body is being well-used, and it’s hard to concentrate on anything else except the need to be with him when I’m not with him. I don’t want to fall for him.
I mean, I want to, but not until I know exactly what’s happening here. Cam could be right and this is just a fling.
“We’re good, honey,” Dutch replies, his beer can resting on top of his knee. “Just about got you ready to go here.”
I walk past the car and the guys, seeing Pike tightening or untightening something with a wrench.
“Really?” I pinch my eyebrows together. “It’s nearly done?”
Pike shoots his eyes up. “Soon.”
Well, yay. It’ll be nice to not have to bum rides. For a while, at least.
“Thank you,” I tell them and then look to Dutch. “What can I do for you? Sandwich? Beer? Free babysitting?”
He just chuckles. “Aw, that’s okay. I saw how nice the house looks, so Pike must be working you pretty hard already.”
“Oh, you have no idea,” I tease. “I’m working up a sweat way past my bedtime lately.”
The wrench in Pike’s hand falters, and he loses his grip on the bolt, shooting me a look.
I fold my grin between my teeth and turn around, walking up the steps and disappearing into the house.
I carry my bag into the kitchen and set it next to my model on the table, and then I grab a bottle of water out of the refrigerator and head upstairs. Taking a towel out of the hall closet, I walk through Pike’s bedroom and into his master bath. The main bathroom is finished being retiled, but I still haven’t moved my stuff out of this one, and I don’t have any plans to.
Closing the door, I strip down to my bra and panties, start the app on my phone, playing Hurts So Good, and wet my toothbrush before swiping some toothpaste on it.
The door opens, and I jerk upright, momentarily startled until I see it’s Pike.
He closes it behind him. “That wasn’t funny,” he says, looking at me sternly.
“I wasn’t trying to make you laugh,” I mumble over the toothbrush.
His lips curl with mild amusement as he comes up behind me, turning me around and pressing me back into the sink. “Trying to shock me out of me comfort zone then?”
I smile.
“You do that a lot,” he accuses, but I know he’s not angry.
I shrug and turn around, spitting out the toothpaste and rinsing out my mouth.
“I can’t help it,” I say, drying my mouth with the hand towel on the sink and looking at him through the mirror. “I don’t like your comfort zone. It’s too tight in there for the both of us.”
His hands trail around my stomach, and he hugs me to his bare chest as he kisses my neck. “But I like tight places,” he whispers.
I twist around and hold his eyes as I unfasten his belt. “You need a shower,” I tell him. “Is he still here?”
He grabs my hands, stopping me. “Yes, unfortunately…”
I walk over to the shower, opening the door and turning on the water.
“You know,” I tell him, “if I’m too much trouble, I can get out of your hair. April called me today. Made me an offer.”
He turns and crosses his arms over his chest, leaning back on the sink. “April?” he repeats. “How did she get your number? And what kind of an offer?”
I unhook my bra, letting it fall to the floor, and push my underwear down my legs. His eyes scale down me, resting on my breasts—his favorite part—and I go on.
“Her brother owns a house he hasn’t had any luck renting it out,” I explain. “She thought it would be great for me to move in. The rent is cheap in exchange for cleaning up the place. A whole house all to myself.”
I step into the shower, but when I try to pull the door closed, Pike is holding it open.
“Well, that was nice of her,” he says, not looking at all happy.
He then starts unbuttoning his jeans, suddenly deciding to join me, I guess.
I nod innocently. “Mmm-hmm,” I say. “She’s an angel. So selfless.”
“Right.” He quirks a brow and steps in, closing the door.
We both know damn well I ruined her night when she was here last, so she can be “helpful” all she wants, but what she’s really doing is helping herself by getting me out of her way.
“And what did you say?” he asks, leaning his head back under the spray and wetting his hair.
“I said I’d think about it.”
“But you can save more money staying here for a while,” he points out. “I think that’s best. Don’t you?”
I laugh to myself, soaping up my loofah. His motives aren’t exactly selfless, either.
“She was concerned I might be uncomfortable,” I explain. “Us here alone together…”
He pushes me back against the wall, and I suck in a breath, dropping the loofah. His hand dives between my legs, and he lifts up my knee, opening me for him. He softly and slowly rubs my clit in circles, making me pulse and go weak in the knees.
“You uncomfortable?” he asks, his voice low and husky.
“No.” My breaks shakes. “But maybe you miss having the place to yourself? Maybe she thought I was in your hair.”
His heated eyes bore into mine, and he shakes his head slowly. “If you leave, I won’t have everything I need in this house.”
He increases his speed, hovering his mouth over mine, and then he slips a finger inside me.
I gasp, closing my eyes, and his lips sink
into mine, kissing me soft and slow as he enters my body again and again.
His tongue flicks my top lip, and then he whispers, “How can I not want to come home to this everyday? So fucking sweet.”
He pulls out of me and then slides back in, two fingers this time, slow and gentle, as he pins me to the wall. I let my head fall back, whimpering as he watches my face.
God, he’s good. I reach down between us and stroke his cock.
“She’s right to watch out for you, Jordan,” he says biting my bottom lip. “You’re too young for all the fucking stuff I want to do to you.”
“I’m not that young,” I taunt. “I’m old enough for lots, in fact.”
“Yeah?” He groans, growing big and hard in my hand. “Hold on, baby.”
He pulls his fingers out, grabs the backs of my thighs, and lifts me up, pressing me into the wall. His cock is long, hard, and ready, and I feel it teasing my entrance.
Yes.
“Hey, Pike!” Dutch shouts.
We both lifts our heads up, Pike drops me to the floor, and he turns his head, looking out the frosted glass.
“I’m in the shower!” he barks, shielding my body from view.
“Yeah, duh,” his friend jokes. “Your phone rang a couple times. Looks like Lindsay. I’m gonna set it on the counter here.”
Pike presses his body into me, so Dutch only sees one body in here if he looks at the glass. “Yeah, thanks,” he says curtly.
I bite my bottom lip, feeling naughty. I lean into him, kissing his jaw and stroking him.
“Jordan…” he growls through his teeth.
I laugh quietly.
“Shhh…” I hear him chide me.
“I’m gonna turn on the game,” Dutch calls out. “I’ll wait for you downstairs.”
“Ok.”
There’s a pause and then Dutch speaks up again. “So, uh…where did Jordan go? I didn’t see her down there.”
“How am I supposed to know?” Pike fires back, losing patience. “Would you get out of here?”
“Ok, fine,” he says. But then he adds, “Just tell her not to forget to pick up all her clothes off the floor when she gets out of the shower with you, okay?”
My eyes go wide, my falls open, and I bury my face in Pike’s body just in time to stifle my laughter. Oh, shit.
The bathroom door closes, Pike’s head drops to my shoulder, and the heat of the moment has left the building as embarrassment warms my cheeks.
Thanks, Dutch.
I wake up late, being jostled out of my sleep and feeling like I’m about to fall. I open my eyes, seeing that I’m in Pike’s arms. He raises me up, one arm under my back and one under my knees.
“What are you doing?” I ask, closing my eyes again and curling into him.
“Sleep with me?” he says.
Sleep with him? Does he even need to ask? A few nights I’ve fallen asleep with him, but for the most part, I’ve tried to spend my nights in my own bed in case Cole comes home and starts looking for me. Or worse, comes into his dad’s room and finds me there. I want Cole to know—I don’t want to hide this from anyone—but we both agreed that he doesn’t need to find out like that.
He lays me down in his bed, and I pull the sheet up over my underwear and tank top.
“You want me naked?” I tease.
“No, please don’t.” He locks his door and then walks around the end of the bed and climbs in the other side. “I actually do need some sleep, and it’s going to be tough enough not getting hard right now without you naked, too.”
He lifts up his arm, signaling me to come in, and I curl up next to him, resting my head on his shoulder.
A wave of peace settles over me. This feels so good.
I run my fingers down his chest and stomach and then circle my arm around him, looking up at him in the dark.
He and I are at two completely different places in our lives. He asked me once what I see in him. I could ask him the same thing.
“What are you staring at?” he asks.
I tip my head back down, rubbing my lips over his skin and thinking. “I envy you.”
“Why?”
I shrug. “You just have yourself figured out, and I don’t,” I tell him. “I worry about everything. Will I make it through school? Will I be who I want to be? Will I have friends and contribute to the world or just wind up doing work I hate like my sister and my father and everyone else I know?” I glance back up at him. “Everyone except you, that is. You give the impression that you’re right where you want to be with yourself, and you don’t regret anything. I regret everything.”
I breathe out a little laugh. “Well, not everything,” I correct myself. “I feel stupid a lot, though. About words I speak as soon as they come out of my mouth. Things I do. Decisions I make. I’m always second-guessing myself. Like maybe I’d just be happier if I stayed quiet and kept my damn mouth shut and my head down.”
His arm tightens around me. “Happier or safer?”
Aren’t they the same?
But no, I know what he’s saying. A ship at harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are for.
“I think you’re scared, because people have worked hard to make you think you’re not worthy of their attention, Jordan,” he says. “Your parents, that ex of yours from high school…even Cole. You gave people a chance, and they abused it. That’s their fault, not yours.” He tips my chin up so my eyes meet his. “Don’t think it has anything to do with who you are. And don’t let anyone make you afraid of yourself. You’re incredible.”
My smile peeks out, and even though a thousand doubts about where he and I are headed run through my head, I’m taking tonight for tonight. I needed to hear that. The only other person who talks me up like this is my sister.
But Pike is better, because I can kiss him, too.
“And I became who I am, because I had no choice,” he points out. “If things had been different, I would’ve liked to go to college. Travel. Maybe wear a suit to work.” His body goes rigid. “I envy you. You’re still growing, and you can still be anyone you want. You have all the choices in the world ahead of you.”
I hadn’t thought about that. How different his life would be if Cole had never come along.
“The memory of you in that suit,” I muse. “You should take me on a date in it. You’ve never seen me in a dress.”
He’s silent, his thumb rubbing up and down my arm, and I know what he’s not saying. He can’t take me out unless we go somewhere out of town.
I take a deep breath, pushing the concern to the back of my mind.
“When I first saw you, I felt like I’d been punched,” he whispers. “You have a body that makes me feel like I’m on a rollercoaster when I touch it.”
I smile and slide off my panties before swinging a leg over him, straddling him and sitting up.
He exhales, gripping my hips. “But really, it wasn’t until the build-up of every little thing you do—bringing me lunch, serving me my own ass in that supply room at the bar both times, and even telling me to get that backsplash and making me laugh with your innuendo about how I’m like a cave.” He laughs. “You make my heart pound so hard it hurts, Jordan. You, your mouth, and who you are, it all makes me want to touch you. It makes me not want to stop this.”
He meets my eyes and tucks my hair behind my left ear. “Do you regret me?” he asks.
I shake my head.
“It’s okay,” he prompts. “You can be honest, even if it’s just a small part of you. I’ll understand.”
I lean down, planting a hand next to his head. “I regret the way I couldn’t stop staring at you the day I moved in when you carried some of my boxes into the house,” I tell him. “How I love the way you don’t say much and how you like to watch movies with me. I regret the way my stomach flips when I hear you moving around in your room in the morning, and I know I’m going to see you soon.” I rub my hand up his chest and over his neck. “And I regret that I look for you when I come in
to a room and how, after you leave for work in the morning, I have to get myself off in the shower again, because I can’t stop fantasizing about you and it gets me too turned on to wait for you to come home.”
His abs flex as he arches up a little, pressing his cock against me.
“And I regret that I would do nothing different,” I go on. “I couldn’t not feel this.”
I swing my leg back over, turn around, and climb on top of him again, this time reverse cowgirl. I lift my T-shirt over my head, letting my hair fall down my naked back, and cast my gaze over my shoulder, flirting with him.
His cock swells underneath me, and I start rolling my hips, grinding.
“You’re trying to kill me,” he groans.
I run my fingers through my hair, feeling his hands run all over my body and reach up to cup my breasts.
“How many women have you slept with?” I ask him.
“How many men have you slept with?” he shoots back. “No, never mind, don’t answer that.”
I grin, answering him anyway. “Before you? Two.”
“More than two,” he retorts with his answer.
“Is there anything I’m not doing that you want to do?” I keep rolling on him, his eyes frozen on my ass as it moves.
“Why are you asking that?”
“I just wonder how I measure up to a man with a lot more experience,” I explain.
He meets my eyes. “First of all, it’s not a lot more experience. And second of all, there are lots of things we haven’t done yet, which I have every intention of doing with you once we can calm down and stop ripping off each other’s clothes the second I step into the damn house after work every day,” he growls jokingly.
I lay back on him, my head next to his and one of his hands reaching down between my thighs.
“Stop feeling so good, and I’ll control myself,” I say.
He kisses me and then holds my eyes, something serious in his. “Don’t think about the other women,” he tells me. “I don’t.”
My chest caves as I stare at him, and I’m filled with things I can’t say. I…
I open my mouth. I…
I kiss him, feeling the stubble around his mouth, his smell feeling like home. I can’t love you. I don’t love you, do I? It’s an impulse. That’s what he’ll say. He’ll say I’m a kid. He’ll say it’s not real.
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