Steven placed his hands on my sides, and moved his fingers slowly up and down my body, caressing my skin. Our tongues darted quickly in and out of each other’s mouths. I brought my hands up to his muscular pecks and used them to hold myself up. We kissed for a moment and then I pulled away. Our eyes met and for the first time in my life, I realized that I might have actually been in love. The butterflies in my stomach told me so, along with the fact that I couldn’t imagine a life without him.
“What are you thinking about?” Steven asked.
Apparently, the epiphany I had just had was written clearly on my face. I slowly crawled off of him and laid next to him on the bed.
“How did you know that I was thinking about something?” I asked.
Steven chuckled and responded, “I always know when something is on your mind. Just like you always know when something is on mine.”
I laid there in silence for a moment.
“I’ve just never cared about anybody the same way that I care about you,” I said. “And it makes me nervous. I’m scared that I’ll end up getting hurt.”
Steven put his arm around me, holding me close. My ear was against his chest and I could hear his heartbeat and his breathing.
“I’ve never cared for anybody like I care about you either, Kelsey,” he said. “I can’t explain it, but there’s something that you do for me that’s so unique. It makes me feel alive and makes me want to be a better man. You’ve changed me for the better, in just the little bit of time that we’ve spent together.”
I placed my arm around Steven’s stomach and started to feel my eyes getting heavy with sleep. The long day at work, combined with the intense sex, had made me exhausted and nothing sounded better than falling asleep next to my man. But as soon as I closed my eyes, a thought entered my mind that immediately woke me up.
Crap...I still need to tell him about my damn date this weekend...
We were both relaxed after having intense orgasms so I figured that it was probably as good of a time as any to tell him about it.
“So, there’s something that I need to talk to you about,” I said, as I used my fingers to draw circles over his abdominal muscles.
Steven turned his face toward me.
“What is it?” he asked.
I could immediately hear the concern in his voice. I took a deep breath, almost wishing that I hadn’t even brought it up.
“My mom tried to introduce me to someone today,” I said.
As soon as I spoke, I braced myself. I had no idea what his reaction was going to be, so I immediately expected the worst.
“What are you talking about?” Steven asked.
I sat up on the bed, keeping my hand on his body.
“When I was at work today, Mom invited me to go to lunch,” I said, feeling anxiety creep up inside of me. “When I got there, I noticed that she was sitting with some guy that I didn’t recognize. I didn’t think much of it. I figured it was just a friend of hers or something.”
Steven’s usual smile had faded. His eyes were locked with mine and for the first time ever, I could have sworn that I saw a flash of jealousy in them. He didn’t say a word, though, so I continued.
“Anyway, I sat down with them and Mom put me on the spot, saying that I ought to go on a date with this guy who was there with her.”
Steven swallowed and then slowly sat up, leaning his back against the wall. I could feel the tension in the air, despite the fact that he was completely silent. I paused for a moment and then Steven brought his gaze to me.
“Go on,” he said.
I attempted a smile, in an effort to cut the tension, but it didn’t do any good. So I just kept telling the story.
“I didn’t want to agree to it, Steven,” I said. “But Mom made me. She said I had no good reason not to go on at least one date with him.”
Steven suddenly glared at me, shaking his head.
“Really, Kelsey?” he said. “You couldn’t think of one reason?”
I shook my head and shrugged my shoulders defensively.
“What did you want me to tell her, Steven?” I asked, my voice getting louder. “Did you want me to tell her that I couldn’t go out on a date with a man because of the fact that I’m sleeping with her husband’s son? I wasn’t quite sure how that would have gone over during lunch.”
What I had hoped would be an easy conversation was quickly escalating. I felt like I was being cornered in both directions. I had my mom on one side, forcing me to go on the date and Steven on the other, trying to make me feel awful about it.
“Kelsey, why did you agree to do it?” he asked. “Do you want to go out on a date with this guy or something? Is that it? Because if that’s the case, then maybe we should call off this whole arrangement between us.”
A sharp pain entered my gut as he spoke those words. Just the thought of not being close to Steven hurt and there was no way that I was going to let that happen.
“Baby,” I said, as I scooted up next to him, placing a hand on his upper thigh. “Please don’t get mad about this. The only reason I agreed to it was because Mom put me on the spot. She cornered me and I couldn’t think of a quick reason as to why I couldn’t go on a silly date. Trust me, if I could have told her about us then I would have.”
Steven crossed his arms and shook his head. I could tell that he was angry, but most importantly, I could tell that he was jealous. And strangely enough, I found myself almost enjoying the fact that I could make him feel that way. It wasn’t because I liked seeing him hurt, either. It was because it proved to me that he didn’t want to lose me and he was afraid of anything that could possibly take me away.
“Goddammit, Kelsey,” Steven said, as he wrapped one of his arms around me, pulling me next to him. “I wish I didn’t feel this way. But I can’t help it. You’re really starting to grow on me and the thought of you going on a date with some guy is something I just can’t deal with. What if you end up liking him?”
I smiled and then kissed Steven on the cheek. As I pulled away, I said, “Are you kidding me, Steven? He’s just some guy. He’s got nothing on you.”
Steven glanced over at me. For the first time I saw weakness and vulnerability in his character. In that moment, he seemed more human than ever before.
“I can’t imagine what it would feel like to lose you,” he said. “I know that we haven’t been this close for very long, but I feel differently about you than any other girl I’ve ever been with. I’ve never met someone who I was truly afraid to lose before. It’s an unfamiliar feeling to me and I don’t even know what to do about it.”
The pain in his eyes was clear. This man needed me in the same way that I needed him. We needed each other. And the more time that went by, the clearer it became that this secret of ours would eventually ruin us.
I brought my hand to his hair, running my fingers through it affectionately. I started to imagine how I would feel if Steven came home one day and told me that he was going on a date with some girl. Just the thought of it caused my stomach to turn. I didn’t think that I’d be able to handle it as well as Steven had, not even close. And as I sat there, looking at the only man in the world that I really needed, I started to realize that I couldn’t go on the date with Allen, even if it meant disappointing my mom. There was no way that I could do that to Steven.
“You know what?” I said.
Steven looked toward me as I continued.
“I’m not going to go on that date,” I said, matter-of-factly. “I don’t want to do it.”
Almost immediately, I saw some relief in Steven’s eyes. You could practically see the weight as it lifted off of his shoulders.
“What about your mom?” he asked.
I shrugged and said, “I’ll put my foot down for once and tell her that I just plain don’t want to do it.”
Steven leaned away from the wall and then brought his legs over the edge of the bed, placing his feet onto the floor.
“Are you backing out of this jus
t because you don’t want to upset me, or do you really not want to go on the date?” he asked.
Both of those things were true, but I knew that wasn’t what he needed to hear.
“I don’t want to go on the date, Steven,” I said. “I really don’t. My mom was just doing what she usually does. You know, driving me crazy.”
Steven’s smile slowly came back on his face and he looked over at me.
“She does seem to enjoy making you crazy, doesn’t she?”
I nodded my head in agreement.
“You know it,” I said.
The tension in the air had all but disappeared and the anxiety inside of me had left with it. Sometimes your heart tells you what you need to do and in this case, it was clear that I needed to respect Steven’s feelings over my mother’s need to fix me up with a stranger. I know that my Mom had good intentions. It was just that she didn’t know the whole story. She didn’t know that I was already plenty satisfied with my life. I had everything that I needed.
“Come here, baby,” Steven said, as he held his arms open.
I placed my hands on his shoulders and then straddled over him, wrapping my legs around his waist as he sat on the edge of the bed. Our faces were just inches apart, our eyes locked. I could have lost myself in those beautiful blue irises, which glowed like the summer sky. I could have just looked into them all day long, trying to see if somewhere in the deep blue color were hidden all of the answers that I needed from life.
“This is so hard on both of us,” I said. “But I can’t imagine not being with you, Steven. I can’t picture a life without you now.”
Steven kept his eyes locked on mine, listening intently as I spoke.
“The only thing that I wish was different, would be if I had met you in different circumstances. You know, if are parents weren’t married and all. Things would be so much easier.”
Steven wrapped his arms around me, holding me by my waist.
“I’m starting to think that maybe things don’t work like that,” Steven said. “We met under these circumstances, because that was the way that we were supposed to meet. If it wasn’t for this crazy situation, we may have never met at all. I may have seen you sitting in a park, or at a coffee shop, but you would have just been a cute stranger. We would have looked at each other, maybe even smiled. But I doubt that we would have ended up talking, let alone falling for each other the way that we have. It would have just been a fleeting moment, if that, and then we would have both forgotten about it by the end of the day.”
Steven paused for a moment. I could see his philosophical wheels turning behind his eyes.
“So in some twisted way,” Steven said. “I feel like we have to be grateful for the uniqueness of our situation. Because maybe, without it, we wouldn’t have had each other at all.”
Oh, my God. He’s right. The things that I hate most about Steven and I’s situation are the same things that brought us together in the first place. If it hadn’t been for my mother meeting William and eventually marrying him, then I wouldn’t be face to face with the most incredible man in the world right now.
“You’re right,” I said. “You’re completely right.”
I pulled him in close, laying my head on his shoulder and hugging him deeply. Our naked bodies were pressed against each other’s.
“But how long can we live this lie?” I asked, as I gently pulled back, looking him in the eyes once again.
Steven was silent for a moment.
“I don’t know,” he finally responded. “As much as I want to say that we can just keep doing this in the shadows, I also know that it’s not really good for either of us. Clearly, this isn’t working out as easily that we had hoped.”
Steven paused for a moment and took a long sigh. The change of expression on his face caused me to assume the worst and I felt my heart sink. I thought that he was about to tell me the most painful thing that I could have ever imagined. I thought for sure that he was about to break the entire thing off with me.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked. “Something is on your mind, Steven. I can tell.”
He looked away for a moment and then slowly brought his gaze back to my face.
“There is definitely something on my mind and I’ve been thinking about it since the first night that we had sex,” he said. “It has kept me awake every night, tossing and turning. I don’t know how much longer I can live with it either.”
I felt like I was about to throw up.
Is he about to break up with me?
Suddenly, though, to my relief, a confident smirk crossed Steven’s face. The tone of his voice began to change and his eyes lit up, as though he had just come up with a solution to our problems.
“I think we need to come clean, Kelsey,” he said, matter-of-factly. “I think we need to tell our parents about our feelings toward each other. Because let’s face it, I’m never going to leave you and I don’t want our love for each other to be hampered by the fact that our parents are married. That’s ridiculous and I’m done living like this. We need to tell them, Kelsey. It’s the only way that we can stay together.”
My jaw dropped and a strange combination of emotions came over me. I was shocked by the fact that he actually wanted to tell our parents about our affair, but I was also so extremely happy that he wasn’t breaking up with me.
“You’re serious?” I asked.
Steven nodded, keeping his eyes locked with mine.
“I don’t see any other way, Kelsey,” he responded. “If we don’t, then we’ll just spend the rest of our lives in hiding, sneaking around and living a lie. Neither of us want to do that and you know it.”
I didn’t really know what to say. The thought of coming clean to our parents made my stomach turn. I pictured my mom turning pale and nearly passing out at the news and I imagined William’s reaction to be pretty similar.
“I don’t know, Steven,” I said, squeezing his shoulders affectionately. “What if they freak out about it?”
Steven shrugged his shoulders and responded instantly, “So what? Who cares? They may feel weird or angry about it for a while, but it’s not like they are going to disown us. If they love us, which they do, then they’ll eventually get over it.”
I sighed as I looked at him. I knew that he was right. We had to come clean or eventually the secret we were hiding would end up tearing us apart. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that in the long run, we didn’t really have a choice. But still, I wasn’t quite ready to pull the trigger just yet.
“Can I at least think about this for a while?” I asked. “There’s no real hurry, right?”
Steven nodded his head and a warm smile crossed his face.
“Of course, baby,” he said. “There’s no real rush. We just can’t live in hiding forever.”
As soon as he finished speaking, I leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. Then I pulled away, looking into his baby blue eyes, which always had me hypnotized.
“We’ll tell them,” I said. “I promise we will. Just let me think about the best way to go about it.”
Steven moved his hands up my bare thighs, resting them on my hips. Then he sat up straight, bringing his lips to the outside of my neck and kissing me affectionately. After a moment, he pulled away.
“It’s all going to work out, Kelsey,” he said. “One way or the other. And I promise that nothing will come between us, regardless of how our parents react when we do decide to tell them.”
I brought my hand up to the back of Steven’s head and ran my fingers through his thick hair, pulling him against me.
“I love you, Steven,” I said.
Steven immediately brought his gaze up to my face, locking eyes with mine. A smile crossed his face and his eyes lit up in a way that I had never seen them light up before. He was silent for a moment, as if his entire world had come crashing to a halt in that moment. Then, after a few seconds, he parted his lips.
“I love you too, baby,�
� he responded.
His words sent a tingle through me and an unintentional smile crossed my face. I couldn’t help it. I had been waiting my whole life to hear a man say that to me in a genuine way and Steven just had.
“I’m glad I have you,” I said, as I continued to run my fingers through his hair. “You mean the world to me.”
Steven smiled and kept his eyes on me. He looked so unbelievably happy in that moment and the emotion was contagious.
“That’s probably the best thing anybody has ever said to me,” he responded. “And you know that I feel the same way about you. You mean the world to me, too.”
As he spoke, I leaned forward, relaxing my head on his shoulder once again, holding him close. For the first time in my life, I felt complete. Everything was in order and working out perfectly. Yes, we still needed to come clean to our parents, but that could wait. In the mean time, I was straddled over the man of my dreams, holding him close and not planning on letting go any time soon.
Chapter 13
“Kelsey, did you get that report written up? I need to have that by tomorrow, so I hope that you’re working on it.”
My boss, Annie, was standing in front of my desk at work, her hands on her hips and her head cocked to the side. She had a particularly condescending demeanor that day. She curled her lips up as she talked, exposing her tall gums and too-big-for-her-mouth teeth. If that job hadn’t been so necessary, I probably would have just gotten up and walked out. But instead, I sat there with a smile on my face, nodding in agreement.
“Sorry, Annie,” I said. “I promise that I’ll have the report done by tomorrow. I’ve been working on it. I’ve just had a lot on my mind and I’ve felt distracted.”
Annie sighed and then placed her hands on my desk, leaning in close to me.
“Hey, I understand how that feels, Kelsey,” she said. “Normally, I wouldn’t be on your case about it, since I know that you always come through. But this report is extremely important, so I need to make sure that it gets done.”
I kept the smile on my face and nodded my head once again.
Steven: A Billionaire Stepbrother Romance Novel Page 9