by Riley Moreno
“But you weren’t,” Sonya said patting his thigh.
“All the way to the hospital I kept thinking I was too late, that kid was going to die because I hadn’t reached him in time,” Diesel’s knuckles were white.
Sonya got up and embraced him. Diesel placed his hand on her belly and the baby kicked.
“I kept thinking how I would die if that were my kid,” he murmured in to her shoulder, “How I’d be demented with grief.”
Sonya kissed the top of his head; strangely relieved by how passionate he was about their child. She stroked his head and decided to talk to him about the thing that kept her up most nights.
“D?” she said. “Have you ever thought about finding your father?”
Diesel held her a little tighter then let go. He began to eat slowly, chewing his bites thoughtfully before swallowing. Sonya decided that he wasn’t going to answer and poured herself some juice to hide her disappointment.
“I wasn’t sure he’d like me,” Diesel finally said. “I mean, of course, I’ve thought about finding him. I’ve thought about what my life would have been like if he had been around. But it’s too late for that.”
“Do you think your mom ever wished she’d told him?”
“No,” Diesel chuckled bitterly. “My mom hated my father. She never took his name in all the years I lived with her. She would just allude to him being this dead beat who left her with nothing. She wasn’t an easy person to love with,” he wiped the crumbs off the table, “I was her son but sometimes I got the feeling that she resented me; blamed me for her life. Don’t get me wrong, she fed me and clothed me and made sure I went to school and she did love me in her own way but she still resented me for ruining her life.”
“But what if you got a chance to find out who your father was,” Sonya said breathlessly, “what if your mother finally told you his name; would you go find him?”
Diesel rubbed the back of his neck, wincing when he brushed the scratches. He shrugged.
“I don’t know,” he said splaying his hands in front of her. “Part of me wants to say yes, part of me is terrified of the rejection. I mean the man probably has a life of his own. I wouldn’t want to ruin it all by showing up at his door. I think it’s enough I ruined the life of one parent.”
“Don’t say that,” Sonya admonished gently cupping his cheek. “You’re the best thing that’s happened to me and I won’t hear a word that says otherwise.”
“We won’t be like that to him,” Diesel said placing his hand fondly on her belly, and the baby kicked, always sensing the touch of his father.
“How can you be so sure it’s a boy?” Sonya asked beaming.
“I asked Dr. Fitz when I was at the hospital,” Diesel grinned sheepishly and Sonya swatted at his hand.
“We were supposed to find out together,” she tried to scold him but she was too happy to be angry.
“I figured it could be my early birthday present,” he smiled goofily and Sonya couldn’t help it she leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose.
Chapter Six
Uninvited
Sonya was on tenterhooks. The party was tomorrow and none of her stupid dresses fit her. She had planned a casual event with Diesel’s closest friends in Shifter Grove and Waterville. Sonya had even gotten in contact with some of Diesel’s Navy buddies and they had said they’d be flying in for the special day.
Getting Diesel to the event wasn’t going to be hard. She’d told him the school was hosting a fundraiser for Henry Tyler’s hospital bills to help the family out and the Locke’s had graciously given the rent of their barn.
Now Sonya was standing in the try room of a JC Penny trying to fit in to a bright blue and orange dress that refused to fit. This was the largest size they carried and Sonya seriously considered tearing the thing to pieces.
“Maybe you could try Maternal America,” the sales girl, a petite blonde, the picture of wholesomeness said when Sonya handed her the dress.
Sonya wanted to gouge her eyes out but Claus pulled her out of the store. She had tried Maternal America but they had such bland colored clothes, pastels and greys, that Sonya would rather go naked than wear one of those dresses.
She was decidedly depressed and wanted a big helping of chili cheese fries at the food court but Claus took her to Macy’s instead. Sonya was in the middle of a change when her phone began to ring in earnest. She was so busy trying to work the intricacies of a strappy dress so she didn’t see who was calling but attended the call.
“Hello?” she said.
“Hello, dear,” Andrew said. “I hope I’m not calling at a bad time.”
“Andrew!” Sonya said and Claus squealed outside the try room. “No, of course not. It’s good to hear from you. How are you?”
“Fine, fine,” Andrew said. “I talked to my family,” he said and Sonya had to suppress a smile. Andrew was jumping right to business; just like Diesel he didn’t have the gift of small talk.
“And?” Sonya said pulling her sweatshirt on and exiting the dressing room.
“My boys think I should go for it,” he said and Sonya got the impression he was beaming. “My wife was a little upset; it’s understandable, but she knows it happened long before I ever met her so she isn’t averse to me getting to know Diesel.”
Sonya was crying now. She was getting really sick of the leaky tap in her eyes since her pregnancy, she hadn’t cried tis much in her whole life!
“So you’ll come?”
“I was thinking I could fly in tomorrow,” Andrew said. “Would you mind me bringing one of my sons?”
“Of course not,” Sonya said, “Actually tomorrow would be perfect. It’s his birthday tomorrow. I have a whole party planned…”
“Oh,” Andrew seemed hesitant. “I’m not sure I’d want such a public place to see him. I don’t know how I feel about this; I don’t know how he’ll feel about it.”
“I understand,” Sonya said quickly. “I’ll bring him to the hotel in Waterville after the party. I’ll book you a room right away.”
“That’s sweet of you Sonya,” Andrew said. “Diesel is a lucky man.”
Sonya was jumping for joy, crying and laughing at the same time.
“Excuse her,” Claus told the staring clerk, “She’s just pregnant.”
They were late. Diesel had made them very late. He had joined her in the shower, then insisted on cleaning her up thoroughly. Then he’d nuzzled in to her as she tried to dry herself then did it for her, rolling in the sheets. Sonya had dressed twice because Diesel had had to undress her right there and then.
She didn’t mind it all that much but Diesel had noticed that she was distracted.
“You don’t love me anymore,” he pouted and Sonya swatted his arm.
Diesel pulled up outside the Locke barn where a host of cars were already parked. It had just started snowing again and the roads were slick with the last of the ice of the winter. Sonya bundled up in her coat, her heart beating faster as they approached the closed doors, Diesel by her side suspecting nothing.
She opened the door for him, watching his face intently when the crowd cheered for him wishing him a happy birthday, her heart filling to the brim watching the play of emotions on his face. He kissed her long and deep then they joined their friends to celebrate.
Sonya was sipping on the punch when she noticed her. Melanie Beal, who she hadn’t invited, was wearing the blue orange dress that wouldn’t fit her. The neck line scooping down to reveal the perfect tops of perfect breasts, synching at the waist and flaring at the hips; her long legs exposed for the world to admire; and she was kissing Diesel on the cheek, lingering to close to his face, whispering something inane as her hand rested on his chest as if it belonged there.
“Who is that?” Samantha asked staring as well.
“The new deputy,” Sonya said woodenly.
“I can punch her face in if you want,” Katherine said. She stood six foot tall and Sonya didn’t doubt she could but she didn’t want
to give Melanie any more importance than she deserved.
“Where’s Claus?” Samantha asked.
“He went to pick up Diesel’s dad from the airport,” Sonya whispered. “He’s going to drop them at the Waterville Hotel and then come over.”
Diesel looked very uncomfortable. Melanie was standing next to him, her hand on Diesel’s arm as if they were a couple. Sonya decided she wasn’t going to intervene. If Diesel didn’t want to encourage Melanie he would get himself out of her clutches, not hope that his girlfriend would do it for him.
“Hi Sonya,” Bill said laughing nervously.
“Hey, Bill!” Sonya said kissing him on the cheek in welcome.
“I’m sorry about Mel,” he said blushing. “I thought she liked me,” he gulped. “I brought her as my date, I didn’t know she was going to do that,” he motioned to Diesel and Melanie with his head.
“It’s not your fault, Bill,” Sonya said touching his arm. “That woman’s a bitch all on her own.”
Sonya could see Melanie from the corner of her eye laughing at something Diesel had said to Joe, the owner of the Pig Out Spot. The front door opened discreetly and Claus came in, his face a picture of worry. Right behind him were two men, one was tall and broad with silver hair, an exact depiction of what Diesel would look like twenty years down the line, and behind him a young man in his early twenties who gave a heart aching reminder of what Diesel looked like when he was younger.
Sonya rushed forward, her heart in her throat.
“Sonya?” Andrew Wake asked and she nodded. “I’m sorry for walking in like this but I kept thinking he’s only thirty minutes away and I couldn’t not come.”
“I’m glad you did,” Sonya said beaming, tears pricking her eyes.
“This is Keith,” Andrew said motioning to the young man behind him. “He’s my youngest.”
“Nice to finally meet you,” Keith said shaking Sonya’s hand. “Now where’s this brother of mine?”
Sonya turned to the crowd; everyone was enjoying themselves, a few couples were dancing and food was being brought in from the roaring barbeque pits outside. Diesel was standing in a group of friends Melanie by his side. Diesel caught her eye and smiled ruefully, rolling his eyes at Melanie who was saying something to him. Diesel noticed the intensity of Sonya’s gaze and glanced behind her. He stiffened, stunned at what he saw and Sonya wanted to scream; the anxiety was killing her.
Diesel left Melanie standing midsentence. Sonya could see that Melanie had not liked that at all. Her pretty face flushed and she looked positively vapid. Sonya dismissed her as unimportant. This was an important moment in Diesel’s life and Melanie Beal had no place in it.
Sonya took Diesel’s arm and found his hands cold but clammy.
“Diesel, this Andrew Wake,” Sonya said introducing the father and son. “And that’s Keith Wake.”
Andrew stared at Diesel, both unable to move, completely floored by their feelings.
“I’m your half-brother,” Keith said stepping forward and taking Diesel’s hand. “One of them actually; Brandon’s in Poughkeepsie looking after the store.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Diesel cleared his throat looking nervously from Andrew to Keith.
“There’s a private room in the back,” Sonya said reading the reaction, “Diesel why don’t you talk Andrew there?”
Diesel nodded and turned stiffly leading the way as if he were back in the Navy.
“He’s in shock,” Sonya said to Andrew who nodded.
“So am I,” he said. “He looks just like me,” he smiled the n followed Diesel.
“Right,” said Keith rubbing his hands together, “Where’s the food at?”
Sonya guided him to the refreshment table excited for Diesel but also to get to know his half-brother.
Chapter Seven
Knowing Me, Knowing You
There was a cheese platter on the coffee table, a cooler full of beer and chips and dip. Diesel had to admit that Sonya had thought of everything. He was still reeling. He hadn’t expected this, to be honest he hadn’t expected anything. His birthdays had always been quiet affairs, his mother giving him a quarter to splurge on candy. There had never been a party, hardly a cake; one time Diesel had blown a candle off a doughnut.
And now he was at a birthday party in his honor meeting his father; two things his mother hadn’t deemed necessary for his life.
Diesel waited for Andrew to take a seat before he sat down himself and got up immediately after reaching for two beers. But did Andrew drink? Diesel held up a beer and Andrew nodded. Diesel handed him the cold bottle, his hands brushing Andrews briefly.
“Hoe’s your mother?” Andrew finally asked after they had sat in silence nursing their beers for about ten minutes.
“She didn’t keep in touch,” Diesel shrugged. “I wasn’t welcome after…” he trailed off.
“The Shift,” Andrew nodded. “I wasn’t either.”
They lapsed in to another silence, questions teeming in their heads that they couldn’t begin to articulate.
“I didn’t know about you,” Andrew said suddenly. “You need to understand that. If I had known about you heaven and earth couldn’t have kept me away.”
Diesel felt his throat constrict with emotion. All his life he had wondered whether he had really been abandoned by his father like Martha had said or if he had been driven away and doubt had always won; why would his father love him when his mother had such a difficult time doing it?
But here he was, in the flesh, saying things Diesel had given up hope of ever hearing.
“She’d told me you’d left,” Diesel said clearing his throat. “That you didn’t want to be part of our family. She never told me your name so I never made the effort to find you.”
“I can understand that,” Andrew nodded. “Martha was; she was a difficult woman. She saw the world differently from how we did.”
“I find it hard to forgive her,” Diesel said honestly.
“You don’t have to,” Andrew said, “but you owe her the curtesy of understanding who she was. She was born in to a devout Catholic family, all fire and brimstone. Her father wasn’t averse to taking his belt to his children if he felt they were disobedient. She didn’t know what a parents love could be like to give it to you.”
Diesel nodded.
“So you live in Poughkeepsie?”
“Yup,” Andrew said settling in to the sofa. “I have a general store there. My wife Sarah runs a Meal on Wheels for the elderly in our area. My son Brandon is a teacher and helps look after the store after school; he had a daughter six months ago, Hailey. Keith just graduated from college and he’s looking for his vocation, whatever that means.”
Diesel laughed. He had always heard stories like this of other families: sibling rivalries and so many personalities you grew up with, like a branch on a tree sprouting a host of leaves. It felt anything but lonely. And now Diesel had that too, a family, siblings he could mention fondly in conversation.
“What about you,” Andrew said, “Sonya told me you Sheriff around here.”
“Yes,” Diesel said. “Before this I was in the Navy for fifteen years.”
“I was in the army,” Andrew grinned, “Served in Vietnam.”
“Afghanistan and Iraq,” Diesel said with a taught smile. “Did they know you were…”
“A Shifter? Hell, yes,” Andrew said. “They made me use it too. It was still new to them back then, Shifters and their abilities and they distrusted us but they didn’t mind using us in battle.”
“I was part of Black Ops,” Diesel nodded. “We were a team of Shifters.”
“It get stuck in your throat, doesn’t it?” Andrew murmured, “Like a bone,”
“You can’t swallow it, you can’t vomit it out either,” Diesel finished.
Andrew beamed at him.
“I never thought I’d get to discuss this with my sons; the harrowing experience. Heck I wished I’d never have to,” Andrew hesitated then put a
hand on Diesel’s. “But I’m glad I have you, I’m glad Martha decided to have you and keep you, I’m glad you survived the war and I’m glad your girlfriend found me.”
“She’s very special,” Diesel grinned. “And she’s having your grandson.”
Andrew nearly skipped at that news.
“Oh, I know its unseemly for an old man like me to be so happy but I am,” Andrew laughed. “A son and grandson in the same day; that kind of happy news comes once in a blue moon. You’ll come and visit us often won’t you?”
Diesel nodded.
“You’ll be welcome all year round,” Andrew said. “I know I want to know everything about you but you remind me of me and I was mighty stubborn about revealing too much about myself too soon. Sonya complains about you not talking much?” he asked suddenly.
“Yes,” Diesel laughed.
“My Sarah does the same,” Andrew shook his head ruefully. “So I’m counting on getting to know you little by little and Diesel,” he squeezed Diesel’s hand and looked him in the eye, “I do want to know you, completely, like I know my other sons. I want to know you.”
Diesel nodded, not trusting himself to speak. In that moment he was the most happy and he had Sonya to thank for it. Sweet, thoughtful Sonya; the mother of his child, who’d united him with his father and brothers.
They joined the rest of the party; Keith waving Andrew over to a table he was eating at with Claus and Katherine. Diesel searched for Sonya and found her standing with Samantha and Larry, talking to the Tyler’s.
“Where’d you disappear to?” Melanie placed both her hands on his shoulders, leaning in provocatively; Diesel could see her nipples through the dress.
“Excuse me,” Diesel said politely removing Melanie’s hands. He walked over to Sonya, taking her on to his arms from behind, kissing the nape of her neck. “Hey.”
“Hi,” Sonya turned her head and smiled up at him, her eyes twinkling.
“Thank you,” he whispered in her ear.
She turned and hugged him.