by Bella Jewel
Oh god.
Someone take me out.
Take me out now.
Soil.
I said soil.
The man laughs and shakes his head. “Very scary.”
“It will be when you’re sweeping it up for months. Now, tell me where my sister is.”
“Told you,” he growls. “I don’t fuckin’ know.”
“Bullshit. Let me in, I bet she’s in there. This is her apartment.”
“Hasn’t been her apartment for months. Your sister is obviously a good liar.”
Dammit.
Fuck, Magnolia! Fuck.
“Let me in to see for myself,” I say, looking past him.
“No.”
“Let me in!” I protest, going to step past him.
He shoves me.
It’s not a hard shove, but it’s enough to make me lose my footing and topple backward down the stairs.
I land on my bottom, thankfully, but the force I land makes my head scream in pain. A pain I haven’t felt. A pain I honestly thought I’d not see. Rupert isn’t happy, and neither am I right now. I grip the sides of my head and clench my teeth as it feels like a freight train is zig zagging its way through my skull. The door slams to the house; he doesn’t even see if he’s killed me or not.
Dammit.
I wouldn’t have fallen if I didn’t have a risky fucking tumor in my head.
It’s like when you kick your toe and suddenly everyone starts standing on it.
I need to be more careful.
“Briella?”
At the sound of my name I very carefully lift my head and look up to see Cohen standing on the front lawn, staring down at me, his face scrunched with confusion.
Oh, Cohen.
These guys are all part of the club, even when King had it. He brought them all on just before Alarick took over and he passed away. He picked them, and took them through everything, including the major hardships that come with club life, before finally patching them all in. There are still a bunch of older members, the ones that totally respect Alarick but mostly just hang out at the club and try to avoid getting involved in the dangerous side.
They’re like strays, I suppose. Members for life. Always there. Always will be.
I can’t say I don’t miss them. Some of those men became like my father. They protected me and helped me and laughed with me. They were always there for me.
Guilt slams into my chest as I stare at Cohen.
He’s the same age as Alarick, but Cohen is so incredibly beautiful. Alarick is scary, rough, rugged. Cohen is scary too, but he has the face of a biker Ken doll. His chiseled jaw looks like it has been sculpted by hand. His hair is dusty blond and always seems to fall over his forehead. His eyes are so silver, you’d have to see them to believe it. They sparkle in the sun, unique only to him. He’s tall, well-built, and covered in tattoos, just like the rest.
He looks like a biker, he’s a deadly man, he’s just far more approachable than most.
“Cohen?” I croak.
“What’re you doin’ down there on the ground?”
“Long story,” I groan, clutching my head.
“You hurt, here.” He leans down and helps me up and my footing takes a little longer than I’d like. He hangs onto me until I’m able to stand on my own, and only then do I step out and pull my sunglasses down because the sun is really hurting my eyes.
“Did that fucker push you?” he asks, looking over at the door that is now firmly shut.
“You could say that. I’m looking for Magnolia. I’m not having much luck.”
Cohen exhales. “Come with me, I’ll find somewhere for us to talk. That’s a long story. Are you staying in town? Does ...”
He trails off and I look to him, even though he can’t see my eyes, I can see his and I can see the flicker of doubt in them.
“Alarick knows I’m here. Alarick is also not happy about it. Look, I get it, I left, and nobody got to say goodbye. I’m not here to cause trouble, I’m here to help my sister and then I’ll go home.”
Cohen studies me, then says in a gruff voice, “Look it’s not my business, yeah? Where are you staying?”
“That was my next question. Is the Inn still the best place to stay?”
He frowns. “It is, but crime is real bad around town at the moment. Don’t want you stayin’ on your own. You can stay with me.”
“With you?” I say, frowning. “Not sure that’s a good idea. It’s safe to say Alarick isn’t happy about me being in town.”
“You’re family, it’s my choice. Come on, we’ll talk about Magnolia when we get there.”
I exhale, because what other choice do I have? At least I know Cohen. At least I trust him. He’s always been good to me and I’d rather be around someone I know right now then to be alone. My fear of dying in my sleep and nobody finding my body for days is incredibly real and strong. It terrifies me to the point some nights I don’t sleep at all. I am forced to take sleeping tablets to try and get some rest.
Doc reminded me rest is more important than anything.
“You look like you’re in pain?” Cohen asks, as we turn and walk to his truck.
“I am. Just a headache. What were you doing walking past anyway?”
“Was heading to see someone when I saw you sittin’ on the ground. You were the last person I expected to see again.”
“Yeah, well, this ghost has unfinished business.”
He chuckles and opens the truck door for me. “You can tell me all about it.”
I get in the truck and stare out the window as we drive through town, passing by familiar houses and buildings. We pass Alarick’s house, which was once King’s house. We all grew up there, well, for most of my childhood anyway. I close my eyes and lean my head against the headrest, my heart aching as old memories try to flood my brain. Memories I’d do best to keep out for now.
“How have you been, Bri?” Cohen asks.
I keep my head on the headrest and answer him. “I’ve been okay, working and enjoying life. You know, the usual.”
“You know you’ve always been the worst fuckin’ liar?”
I chuckle. “Yeah.”
“You’ve gotten no better at it.”
“Oh, believe me, I know. It’s like as I got older, the flaws in me get stronger and not weaker. I just threatened that guy back there with his own pot plant. I threatened to tip it over. Tip. It. Over.”
Cohen laughs, deep and throaty. “Fuck me. You really haven’t changed.”
“Nope.”
“Well, I’m glad to see you, darlin’. It’s been too long. Know the other guys will be glad to see you, too.”
“Sissy wasn’t glad to see me,” I point out.
Cohen grunts. “Sissy is a fuckin’ bitch. Don’t let her bother you.”
I smile.
Just for a moment.
Because right now, here in the car with Cohen, it feels like nothing in the world could bother me.
Like nothing has changed.
Like I’m right back where I was five years ago.
With my family together.
Now I’ve got Rupert.
And he’s one determined little tumor.
Time is running out.
“YOU STILL LIVE HERE, huh?” I say to Cohen as he opens the door to the one story, incredibly large house that he grew up in.
“Yeah, Mom passed, and she left it to me.”
“Oh,” I say softly as we walk up the front steps, Cohen holding my bag in his hand. “I’m sorry, Cohen. I loved your mom.”
“Yeah, I know. It was fucked but I’m here and we’re doin’ okay.”
“Have you still got ...?”
I can’t finish my sentence when a massive German shepherd comes skidding around the corner and bounding toward me, tongue hanging out, happy tail wagging. “Germy!” I cry, dropping down to my knees as the huge dog launches itself at me, and we both fall to the ground, my fingers tangling in his fur.
I lo
ve this dog.
Cohen’s family got him when I first met them and he was just a little puppy. They couldn’t figure out a name for him, and I kept calling him Germy which in my mind was short for German Shephard and it stuck. He’s been Germy ever since and I love him as much as I did the day I first met him.
“I swear you’re the only person he loves like that,” Cohen murmurs, staring down at me.
I laugh and standing, Germy pawing at my leg to get back on the ground with him. “Soon, buddy. Soon.”
I look to Cohen. “I can’t believe you still have him.”
“He’s not going anywhere, you should know that.”
I smile. “I’m glad. Which room should I put my stuff in?”
He points down the hall and I follow him as we walk to a room and he opens the door. It’s pretty plain, with just a double bed and a dresser but it’ll do. I’m not after anything fancy. After all, I’m not staying long.
“Thank you for this,” I say, turning to him.
He nods and puts my bag down. “Freshen up and then come out and talk to me, we’ve got a lot to cover.”
I exhale.
That doesn’t sound good.
Magnolia is in trouble, I just know it.
It’s not what I need to be dealing with right now, and yet I have to sort it out before my surgery.
One thing at a time.
Just one.
4
THEN – BRIELLA
I stare at the huge clubhouse and my eyes widen as I timidly follow King inside the big gates. We walk past a big group of bikes, and I’m in awe over their beautiful colors. Then we go inside the house, which is big and round, with lots and lots of windows. Mom told me it is three stories high. Three. I can’t believe it. I want to go all the way to the top so I can stare out the window.
We step inside, and I immediately stop as I see a big group of men playing a game of pool. I duck behind King, terrified. I didn’t know there would be so many men here. I don’t really know what the club is, if I’m being honest, but I thought maybe it was just a place they all hang out.
A big hairy man with a long beard and lots of tattoos walks over and says, “Prez. See you got the little one with you?”
“Just showin’ her the club.”
The big man leans down and peers around behind King’s legs where I’m hiding, hoping no one will see me. “How you doin’ there, little darlin’? I’m Dog, but you can call me Doggie, if you like.”
Dog.
That’s his name?
What a terrible name.
“Is that really your name?” I ask him, staring around just a little more to see him.
“No, honey, my name is Harley. That’s just what everyone calls me in here.”
I purse my lips. “I think I’ll call you Harley.”
He chuckles. “I like her.”
“Yeah,” King chuckles, too. “Me, too.”
We walk in farther, and King introduces me to so many people I just know I’ll never remember all their names. Then we go to a big area with lots of tables and a counter where a lady is serving drinks. King sits me on a stool and tells her to give me a lemonade and him a beer before sitting on the chair next to me.
“What is a club?” I ask him, staring around the big room.
“It’s just a group of men who stick by each other, who take care of each other. We’re like brothers. Does that make sense?”
I nod. “Yeah, I guess. But you have your own house and your own name and everything ...”
“That’s because we ride together and work together, darlin’.”
“What work do you do?”
His eyes flash, just a little, like he’s got a secret he can’t share with me. “Just keeping the town safe.”
“Like a police officer?” I ask, with wide eyes.
“Somethin’ like that, darlin’. Somethin’ like that.”
“Dad.”
I look over to see Alarick walking in, followed by a pretty young girl. She’s the same age as him, at least she looks like she is, and she’s got dark red hair and green eyes. She’s so beautiful. I wish I were that beautiful.
“What’re you doin’ here, boy? Thought I sent you to do some work.”
Alarick nods. “You did. Got somethin’ to chat to you about. Got a minute?”
King stands and looks down at me. “Sit here, don’t go anywhere.”
Alarick and King disappear, and the pretty girl walks over and sits on the stool beside me. “Hi there,” she says, “I’m Karen. What’s your name?”
“Briella.”
“That’s a super pretty name. Are you Alarick’s sister?”
“Step-sister,” I tell her. “Are you his girlfriend?”
She giggles. “Oh, no, nothing like that. He is pretty cute though, right?”
I purse my lips and say, “I guess.”
I listen to Karen ramble on for the next ten minutes, and when Alarick returns, King’s face is hard as he says to me, “You need to go with Alarick. I have something to do.”
Oh.
I frown and look over to Alarick, who is watching his father, his face really still. Not a single thing on it is moving, not even a blink. I wonder what they just talked about in there? Was it really bad? Is someone in trouble?
“Is my mom okay?” I ask softly.
King’s face immediately softens, and he walks over, grabbing my shoulder and saying, “She’s perfectly fine. Go on home, honey. I’ll see you there.”
Alarick nods at me when I glance back at him, and I turn hesitantly and follow him and Karen out the door and toward their ride. I don’t know the guy whose truck we get into, but Alarick does, because he chats to him as he drives us home.
I stare out the window, watching the trees go by.
It’s in that moment I realize I have so much to learn about this club, and the life they lead.
So much.
MY HANDS HIT THE SIDEWALK and I cry out as the rough gravel skins my knees. My backpack falls over my head, landing on the ground in front of me, and the sound of girls giggling can be heard behind me. Tears burn under my eyelids as I hang my head, wishing, with everything I am, that we could just go home. That I didn’t have to live here, with Sissy constantly tormenting me.
“Fuck’s sake, Sissy.”
Alarick’s angry voice rumbles loudly and a moment later his hand is wrapping around my arm and he’s lifting me up so I’m standing. Then he leans down and takes my backpack, handing it to me before his eyes drop to my bleeding knees. I’m trying not to cry, but I can’t stop the tears that break through and roll down my cheeks. I’m so embarrassed. I hate Sissy. I hate her so much.
“Leave her the fuck alone, Sissy, or I’ll make sure you don’t get anywhere with Corben.”
Sissy’s face falls and she crosses her arms. Her two friends stop laughing and their mouths drop open.
“What do you know about Corben?”
“I know you like him. Know you want to go out with him. I also know he’s scared of me. One word to him, and I promise you he won’t come anywhere near you. What’s it goin’ to be? The boy of your dreams or her?”
Sissy’s face twists as she stares at her brother, then she glares at me and growls, “She’s not fun anymore anyway. Whiny little brat. Come on, girls, let’s go find someone else to play with.”
She storms off, stomping her perfect pink shoes on the pavement as she goes past us. When she has disappeared, Alarick turns to me, and I immediately put my head down, tears rolling down my cheeks as I try to stop my sobbing. He steps forward and takes my chin in his hand, tipping my head back so I’m looking at him. “You can’t let Sissy push you around like that, or anyone for that matter.”
“I can’t stop her,” I sob. “I don’t know how.”
“I’ll show you how. You shouldn’t ever have to deal with a bully, do you understand?”
I nod and, with his thumb, he swipes away a tear. My heart does a funny little flip flop as I look up at
him. “Defend yourself, always, Briella. The world out there is ugly. You have to know how to take yourself through it unscathed.”
“I’m just a cry baby,” I whisper. “That’s what Sissy said. I cry over everything. I don’t know how to stop.”
“Just stop. Hold your head up high and don’t take any crap from anybody. I’ll teach you how to defend yourself, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Now go on to school and stay away from my sister.”
I nod again and he lets me go, stepping back. I turn and walk toward the bus stop and look back at him, calling out his name.
He has his back to me walking away, but he pauses and looks over his shoulder at the sound of his name.
“Thanks,” I say, softly.
He nods. “Anytime.”
Somehow, I know he means it.
Anytime.
He’ll be there for me.
Anytime.
I just know it.
5
NOW - BRIELLA
“You haven’t seen her for a few weeks?” I ask Cohen, sitting on his sofa drinking a cup of tea.
I’d love a beer, but my doc said no alcohol. Nothing that can trigger anything.
So tea it is.
Boring much?
“No,” Cohen says, leaning back in the chair and taking a sip of his very nice, very cold beer. “Last time I saw her was at the bar in town. I was tryin’ to talk to her, but she was all over the place. Spacey. Avoidant. Know she was livin’ with a few people in that apartment you were at, but I don’t know if she’s still there. She was hangin’ around with some shady people. People who have been somewhat of a problem for us.”
I exhale. “I wish I knew all of this.”
“To be fair,” he points out, “nobody even knew where you were except Magnolia. Not like we could warn you.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m not blaming you, or anyone else. I just want to sort her out so I can ...”
“Can what? Go back home and leave without contact like before?”
I look to him, and I know my eyes soften when I carefully say his name.
“Don’t, you don’t have to explain yourself to me. Don’t know what went down between you and Flick, but I know it left him fucked.”