by Sarah Morgan
CHAPTER SIX
OVER the next few days she experienced the full might and force of the Ferrara machine. Her grandfather was moved to a private room to convalesce, his near miraculous recovery attributed to Santo’s prompt intervention but also an astonishing will to live. And that will, the staff believed, came from a determination to see his granddaughter marry. And Santo fed that determination by keeping him appraised of the wedding plans—plans in which Fia had little input.
‘If you have any requests then let me know,’ Santo said one morning as they drove back from the hospital. ‘We’ll marry at the Ferrara Spa Resort, our flagship hotel. It’s licensed for weddings and it’s a beautiful venue, right on the beach. I’m planning on keeping it as small as possible.’
Of course he was. This wedding wasn’t something to broadcast, was it?
‘I’d like to invite Ben and Gina.’
He tensed slightly at the mention of Ben’s name and she fully expected him to refuse, but instead he nodded. ‘Yes. They are an important part of Luca’s life. They should be there. I will arrange it.’
He arranged everything, or rather his team did.
It was his insistence that one of his top chefs step in to run the Beach Shack that enabled her to spend as much time with her grandfather as she needed to in those early days. And the occasional phone call to Ben was all it took to reassure her that all was well with the restaurant and that the new chef was following Santo’s orders to run the place exactly as Fia ran it.
She wanted to be angry that he’d taken over, but the truth was that Santo had taken a hideous, stressful situation and made it as smooth for her as he possibly could. Because of him, her grandfather was making a good recovery, her business was safe and her child was happy.
And every time she felt wobbly about her decision, she just had to look at how he was with Luca.
‘My staff have interviewed and appointed three nurses with excellent qualifications who will provide round the clock care for your grandfather when he is discharged home.’ Santo negotiated the thick traffic with the ease of a native Sicilian. ‘They will work on a rota so that your grandfather will never be alone.’
For years her only mode of transport had been her dusty old moped. Now each journey was made in supercharged, superaccelerated, air-conditioned luxury. ‘I can’t afford that level of care.’
‘But I can. And I am the one paying.’
‘I don’t want your money. I can look after him myself. I’ve been running a successful business since I was eighteen.’
‘Even if you were not about to marry me, that would be an unsustainable proposition. You cannot raise a child, run a business and be a full-time carer.’
‘Plenty of people do just that. You may have missed the press release because it was sent to “modern man” and you don’t fall into that category, but it is possible to have it all.’
‘In my experience “having it all” usually includes a nervous breakdown,’ Santo drawled, leaning on his horn as the driver in front stopped to let out a passenger and blocked the road. ‘I want a wife, not a basket case so we’ll buy in the appropriate help, which should leave you with the energy for the important parts.’
‘I presume you consider the “important parts” to take place in your bedroom.’
‘Funnily enough, I didn’t mean that. I was talking about the energy required to care for a young child but yes, sex is going to keep you busy too. I’m a demanding guy, angelo mia. I have needs.’ The engine growled as he accelerated past the car, shifting gears smoothly. ‘And if you’re going to satisfy those needs, you’re going to need your sleep.’
She had a feeling he was winding her up but she didn’t know him well enough to be sure.
He was ferociously bright, that she was sure about, but he also made no apology for being a red-blooded male.
All he’d used were words and yet the desire came in a rush, the force of it shocking her because she’d never felt this way with any other man and she didn’t want to feel it about this one. Beneath all the worry and the questions, she was woman enough to wonder whether everything she remembered from that night was real or whether she’d imagined it all.
Yes, he’d been demanding, but she’d been demanding, too. In fact she couldn’t even remember who had made the first move in the thick sweltering darkness of that hot summer night. He’d slaked his appetite and she’d slaked hers. He’d taken and she’d taken right back.
Because she didn’t want to think about sex, she went back to something he’d said earlier. ‘There is one thing you’ve forgotten in all this. You’ve forgotten to make me sign a prenuptial agreement.’
He laughed. ‘We’re not going to need one of those.’
‘Don’t be so sure. You’re a very rich guy. Aren’t you afraid I’m going to take you for every penny you have?’
‘A prenuptial agreement is only necessary in the event of a divorce. I’m very traditional. I believe that marriage is for ever. Once a Ferrara wife, always a Ferrara wife. We will not be getting a divorce.’
‘Maybe you’ll want one.’ She didn’t understand her need to goad him but she couldn’t help herself. ‘Maybe you won’t find being married to me particularly entertaining.’
‘As long as you focus on one particular type of entertainment, we’ll be fine.’
She decided he was definitely winding her up and threw him a look. ‘If you’re so damn horny how can you be sure marriage is going to suit you? Being trapped with one woman might drive you mad.’
‘Been reading my press coverage?’ He threw her an amused glance and a sexy smile that travelled right through her body. ‘I never said I wasn’t going to keep you busy but you can relax. You have no reason to be jealous. I intend to focus all my attention on you. All of it, tesoro.’ His husky voice teased her nerve-endings. Or maybe it was the words again. The way he managed to inject each phrase with lethal promise. Under that veneer of smooth control she sensed darker emotions that simmered beneath the surface he presented to the world. From the rocky base of her own family, she’d watched him grow from boy to man. She understood the volatility that was so much a part of his nature, but she’d also seen the drive. Unobserved, she’d watched as he’d learned to windsurf and to sail. She’d admired the sheer determination that never allowed him to give up on anything until it was mastered. And then there had been the women. Golden-haired girls who flocked to the beach in the hope of attracting the attention of one of the Ferrara brothers.
It was no wonder he was sure of himself, she thought numbly. No one had ever said no to him. No one had ever challenged his supremacy. And suddenly she couldn’t help herself.
‘Maybe you won’t be enough for me,’ she said calmly, deciding to play him at his own game. ‘I have needs too. Needs every bit as powerful as yours. Maybe you won’t be able to satisfy me.’
Dark eyebrows rose, but the faint gleam in his eyes suggested he appreciated the humour. ‘You think not?’
‘No. I don’t see why men always think they have the monopoly on sexual needs. I’m just saying that perhaps I’ll be the one looking elsewhere.’
He stopped the car so suddenly that the seat belt locked.
Oblivious to the cacophony of horns sounding behind them, he turned to face her and her heart raced away in a crazy rhythm under that glittering gaze because the humour was gone.
‘I didn’t mean it,’ she muttered. She realised she’d been stupid to goad him in that way. ‘You were winding me up and I was doing the same. For goodness’ sake, Santo—my father was unfaithful to my mother for the whole of their marriage, do you really think I’d do that?’
He inhaled slowly. ‘Not a good joke.’
‘No, but—’ she hesitated ‘—since this conversation has turned serious—I’m well aware that you’re marrying me
just because of Luca so we’re not exactly glued together by love, are we? I’m not a meek, obedient girl who is going to sit in the corner while you go off with other women. What happens if you do fall in love?’
He stared at her for a long moment and then turned his attention back to the road and eased back into the horrendous traffic. ‘I’d be bored silly in five minutes with meek and obedient. I don’t want you to sit in a corner. As my wife you will inevitably have a high profile. And whatever happened in the past, I respect you as the mother of my child and that is enough to glue us together. And as for your father—’ his voice hardened ‘—his behaviour was dishonourable and beneath contempt. I would never behave in such a way towards the mother of my children. You have no need to worry. And no need to be jealous.’
Humiliated that she’d revealed so much, she turned her head and looked out of the window but she was oblivious to everything except her own emotions. She realised that she didn’t even know where they were. She’d been so wrapped up in her emotions she hadn’t been watching the route. ‘I’m not jealous.’
‘Yes, you are. You’re worried I’m going to cheat on you and I don’t mind that because it proves you’re committed—’ He leaned on his horn and overtook a driver who he obviously considered to be going too slowly. ‘If you’d told me to go ahead and have an affair, I would have been worried. You feel strong emotions and I’m comfortable with strong emotions. I just need to persuade you to express them. From now on “hiding in the boathouse” is banned. And I use that term figuratively as well as literally.’
She hadn’t been back to the boathouse for years. Once, it had been her favourite hiding place, her sanctuary, but she hadn’t been back there since that night.
Santo drove into the courtyard of a beautiful palazzo and Fia glanced around her in surprise.
‘Where are we?’
‘My brother Cristiano’s town house. You’re choosing your wedding dress. Dani is here and also Cristiano’s wife, Laurel. You’ll like her. She is calmer than Dani so hopefully she’ll add some sense to the proceedings.’
‘They separated—’ she frowned, trying to remember ‘—I read something in the paper.’
‘But now they are back together and stronger than ever. They have a daughter, Elena, who is the same age as Dani’s Rosa, and an older daughter, Chiara, who they adopted a year ago.’ He switched off the engine. ‘So you see, Luca’s family is expanding by the minute.’
‘I read that they were getting a divorce.’
‘Not any more.’ He gave a gentle smile and released her seat belt. ‘As I said, angelo mia, once a Ferrara wife, always a Ferrara wife. Remember that.’
* * *
She got through the wedding ceremony by telling herself that she was marrying for love. Not love for Santo, but love for her son. And any doubts she might have had were swept away by the sight of Luca being welcomed into the big, noisy Ferrara family. He thrived on the attention, adored playing with his cousins and wouldn’t let his father out of his sight. And Fia couldn’t help but warm to Santo’s mother, who embraced her tightly as she welcomed her to the family. They never held anything back, she thought. They didn’t ration love. They weren’t afraid that too much was a bad thing.
The media, tired of the endless gloom of economic disaster, greedily devoured a happy story. Thanks to the few choice details fed to them by the Ferrara publicity machine, they’d pieced together a romantic tale that bore no resemblance to reality. According to the press, their relationship had been conducted in secret because of the long-standing feud between their families, but now it was out in the open and the headlines read ‘Love conquers all’.
But perhaps the press were most charmed by the sight of her grandfather and Cristiano Ferrara shaking hands and talking together at length, finally putting an end to hostilities.
‘I’m worried this is all too much for you, Nonno.’ The tension a constant knot in her stomach, Fia sat down on the chair next to her grandfather. ‘You should still be convalescing.’
‘Don’t fuss. Ferrara has half the hospital standing guard,’ her grandfather grumbled. ‘What can happen?’
But she could tell he was impressed by the care and attention Santo had paid to him and if her insides hadn’t been churning so alarmingly at the thought of what was coming, she would have been grateful, too. As it was, she stole a glance at the handsome man who was now her husband and felt a flicker of trepidation. It was all very well for him to say that marriage was for ever but, apart from the moment they’d exchanged vows, he hadn’t looked at her. Not once. It was as if he were trying to postpone the moment he had to confront reality. What would happen when the guests finally left and they were alone? Would there be stilted conversation? Would he suggest an early night?
Her grandfather gave a rare smile. ‘Look at Luca. Now that’s how a boy should play.’
Fia looked and saw her son shrieking with laughter as his father held him upside down by his ankles. She felt a lurch of anxiety.
‘I hope he doesn’t drop him on the terrace.’
Her grandfather gave her an impatient look. ‘You fuss him to death.’
Did she fuss him to death? She’d tried so hard to make sure Luca knew he was loved. Had she overdone that?
‘I just want him to be happy.’
‘And what about you? Are you happy?’ It was the first time her grandfather had ever asked her that question and she didn’t know how to answer.
She should have been happy that Luca now had his father in his life and that the long-running feud between their two families had finally been put to rest.
But how happy could a marriage be when the only love involved was for a child?
Her father had made no secret of his resentment towards his children. He’d married because of pressure from his father—her grandfather—and four lives had been damaged as a result of his innate selfishness.
But Santo was nothing like her father, she reasoned. It was obvious that he felt nothing but unconditional love for his son and already Luca was being enveloped in the warm, protective blanket of the Ferrara family.
‘I’m giving him the land as a wedding gift.’ Her grandfather scowled at her. ‘Satisfied?’
She gave a weak smile. ‘Yes. Thank you.’
He hesitated and then squeezed her hand in an almost unprecedented show of affection. ‘You did the right thing. Eventually.’
The right thing for Luca, yes. But for her?
She was less convinced.
Eventually the guests started to drift away. Her grandfather, tired but less grumpy than she’d seen him in a long time, was ushered away by concerned health staff and only a few close family remained.
Feeling alone in the crowd of Ferraras, Fia paced restlessly to the far side of the terrace where they had gathered to ‘celebrate’.
‘Here—’ Dani thrust a glass of champagne into her hand ‘—you look as though you need it. Welcome to the family. You look stunning. That dress is perfect, if I say so myself.’ She clinked her glass against Fia’s. ‘To your future, which is going to be good, despite what you’re thinking right now this minute.’
Fia wondered how she knew. She wasn’t used to confiding in people. On the other hand, she was grateful to Dani for at least making an effort to be friendly. ‘Am I that easy to read?’
‘Yes.’ Dani stretched out a hand and brushed a strand of hair from Fia’s shoulder. ‘I know that you and Santo have your problems; I’m not fooled by this story he’s spinning for the world. But it’s going to be fine now you’re married. You’ll work it out. There’s something strong between you. I sensed it that morning I arrived to help with Luca. You could barely keep your hands off each other.’
That was just sexual chemistry and Fia knew you couldn’t build a marriage on that. ‘He’s angry wi
th me.’
‘He’s Santo,’ Dani said simply. ‘He feels deeply. About everything, but most of all family. Cristiano is the same. But now you are family.’
‘But he didn’t really want to marry me.’ The words came out in a rush. ‘I’m irrelevant.’
‘Irrelevant?’ Dani looked at her for a long time and then smiled. ‘Let me tell you something about my brother. Whatever you may have heard, he is very, very picky when it comes to women and he believes that marriage is for ever. He would not have married you if he didn’t think the two of you could make a go of it.’
‘I don’t think he’s thought about us at all. This is about Luca.’
‘But you made Luca together,’ Dani said gently, ‘so there must have been something. And you’re certainly not irrelevant. He’s spent the whole evening trying not to look at you.’
‘You noticed that?’ Her humiliation deepened but Dani smiled.
‘It’s a good sign. I have a suspicion my very confident brother is feeling confused for the first time in his life. That has to be a good thing.’
‘I took it as a sign that he’s indifferent.’
‘I don’t know what he feels but it’s not indifference.’
Fia had no chance to question her further because Dani was immediately dragged away to speak to a bunch of cousins and Fia was left alone again. She was now married to one of the wealthiest men in Italy, but she longed to be back at the Beach Shack, clearing up after evening service, with the prospect of an early-morning dip in the sea with her son.
It had been agreed that Luca would stay with Dani and her family for the night and the thought of being without him brought a lump to her throat. Suddenly she wanted to scoop up her son and run straight back into her old life where her emotions and feelings had been a steady, predictable thing. Instead she had to hug him goodbye and watch as he left with his new family. Was it selfish to wish he were just a little anxious about leaving her? Was it wrong of her to wish he’d clung just a little longer instead of smiling with excitement at the prospect of spending more time with his cousins? Was it cowardly to wish she had him here, because he formed the only effective barrier between herself and Santo?