by Holly Ice
I stepped into his personal space, close enough to feel his breath on my cheeks, and searched his dark eyes.
‘This involves me. I need to ken what this is.’
Shane stepped back and crossed his arms. ‘No.’
‘Please, Shane.’
His cat’s lips drew back in a loud hiss, her face a gargoyle of its usual expression. Shane wasn’t giving an inch.
I looked at a night and stars that were suddenly filled with much less promise. These people were no different to the world outside. Everyone had an agenda.
‘Don’t think I won’t find out what this is. This was your chance to come clean. Next time, I will report you.’ And hell if I was calling him, however weird things got here.
* * *
I dumped my jacket on the bed and threw myself after it, my feet dangling off the edge. How could I ever have thought I’d sleep with Shane? Hiding stuff like this wasn’t okay. But I still wanted him.
I groaned and hid my head under my pillow. How could he be nice and an arse at the same time?
Bianca?
What, Lyall? I’m not in the mood for half answers and sarcasm.
It’s not that.
I pulled my head out. Then what – oh. Oh.
Lyall wasn’t perched on the side or on the floor or flying through the room. He was standing on the floor, and nearly six feet tall with a straight nose, heavy brow, strong jawline, and a fit body. His very human figure couldn’t be much older than thirty. And I was somehow sure this was my very feathered raven familiar.
This is my true form.
It couldn’t be. The headmaster said the initiation spell showed your true form.
There’s a reason I took so long to appear.
…Say that’s right, why are you only showing yourself now?
This is the first time you’ve been alone. I didn’t know how you’d react. I didn’t want to announce this in the middle of a lesson without proof. He gestured to his new form.
I thought back and, outside the bathroom – which was beyond inappropriate – he was right. So you’re an ancestor, not an animal guide?
Correct.
Why hide? From what I can tell, Cognata are better respected. More powerful, usually.
That, I can’t tell you.
And suddenly much of his evasion and sarcasm made sense. Familiars weren’t supposed to reveal their lives before they came to be our guide, which was much harder for a human ancestor’s spirit than an animal guide.
Is this all linked to what’s going on with Shane?
Could that scrutiny be why he hid? Did he ken it was coming, what it was about?
I don’t think so. I’m not sure what he wants.
I frowned at Lyall’s human form, but he didn’t look like anyone on Maw’s side of the family. At least no one I knew of.
Are you from Dad’s side of the tree or Maw’s?
That’s not for me to say.
This rule is stupid. Who came up with it?
Aether, I suppose. There are some things we must leave behind when we die.
Still stupid.
He laughed. There’s much I’d change. But then, I’ve passed. It’s no longer my place to change things here. Not for my sake.
I shook my head. Whatever he said about his identity not necessarily being important, I had to find out who he was. I needed to know how my family fit into this magical world. How I fit.
Chapter 9
Class was over and, in what was becoming a habit, I hurried through the back of the school to the library. The grandness was still stunning.
The double-height ground floor allowed for huge curtained windows, overlooking the lake. Bookcases covered every wall and stood in a maze-like pattern through the main floor, tall enough to need the frequent ladders. The top shelf must be at least ten feet tall. But I couldn’t stare at it all day. I wasn’t here for the scenery.
I nodded at the resident librarian and his bawdy female familiar. Both tried and failed to keep a straight face. I rolled my eyes. A few days ago, I’d asked for directions to the ancestry section, and they’d doubled over in hysterics. Apparently, searching through those books was something witches from old families did to check a potential boyfriend wasn’t related to them. And the joke never seemed to get old.
My reading table was under a small window on the front side of the school, away from the lake and hidden from immediate view behind a few turns of the bookcases.
I settled into the wingback armchair, pushed off my shoes, and pulled a fluffy blanket out of my bag to get comfortable.
A stack of witch family tomes sat in front of me. Only three more large families to flick through. Then I got into the lesser known offshoots, most of which fizzled out. I thought it more likely Lyall and I belonged there, unless I was some mishap in a tree somewhere. Either way, scanning through all the names, portraits, and old photographs felt like searching for a needle in a haystack. But how else could I search for my familiar and my family? Lyall had to be in there somewhere, hopefully in a photograph with a clear shot of his face.
Must you look through these?
I don’t see why you can’t be more supportive.
I was doing this to find him. The way he’d spoken about his life, I could do something to remember him, to make him feel better about the way he left. Maybe I could pass on messages to his descendants, other than myself. I mean, I could have siblings out there. Aunts, uncles, cousins. I could have a huge family, just out of reach. People that could offer me more than a roof over my head. That blood connection. If Lyall was a human familiar, I had much closer connections than I thought to this world. Close enough to be remembered, to have living relatives.
This isn’t your path.
How can you be so sure?
You could look through all these books and still not find what you’re looking for.
Are you saying you’re not in here?
I don’t know. I might be. What I’m saying is that this isn’t what you need right now.
Always so evasive.
It’s–
What aether demands. I ken. It’s still irritating.
He landed on top of the book stack and squawked at me. Your studies are falling behind for this. That should be your focus. Or making friends. Have you spoken to anyone other than Shane, your teachers, and your roommate?
You’ve only known me a few days. How can you ken what’s good for me?
Why is shutting yourself away a better path? These dusty tomes have nothing to do with you.
I snapped shut the latest book. Is this because I haven’t done my homework yet? Or are you bored?
No. It’ s because you haven’t gone to anything since the party. Shane upset you, but that is no reason to hide in the library.
I wished I could send him an internal hmmf because that’s all the response that statement deserved.
Don’t be so mopey. There are better subjects to research than me, anyway. You can’t find out what Shane’s up to in these musty old books.
No. And I also couldn’t convince myself to overrule logic and sleep with him if I avoided him. I thought you wanted me to stay away from Shane.
Better him than this nonsense.
My phone buzzed. It was Kaylee. She messaged me every night, inviting me to a variety of events. She wasn’t in our room much, and face-planted the bed around midnight. Later, sometimes.
I opened the message.
‘Hey, B. I’m going out with the girls tonight. Some people are coming from dance club, too. You should come. Message me if you want to join! xx’
‘Which girls?’
‘Amélie, and a few others from my familiar support group.’
Right. She’d been spending more and more time with others in her house, especially that group. But I always got the impression they didn’t want me around.
To hell with it. Going out would shut Lyall up for the night.
‘Okay. I’ll meet you for drinks when I’m done studying. Na
me the place.’
‘Pils Virtuve. It’s just off the high street. I’ll message when we leave. See you soon! xx.’
I locked my phone and reopened the book on the McKee family. I had a lot to cover if I was going to take the night off.
Though I should have tackled this book first. The longer I left it since my argument with Shane, the more I wondered if he had good reasons to not trust me yet. He had only just met me. I gritted my teeth. No. Explaining away his actions was my sex drive talking. I needed to find another hot guy and do away with that wee problem. Then I could stop tying myself into knots over a guy who didn’t give a shit.
A few hours later, and the McKee book was done. I’d found out Shane was the head’s nephew, but nothing else seemed significant. And I’d finished the introduction to the next family book when boots clipped the floor, coming this way.
Kaylee peered around the corner, throwing me a wave.
I couldn’t believe it. How had she even found me over here? Had she asked the librarians? ‘Kaylee. I thought you were texting.’
She pawed through the books on my table. ‘I thought you were studying. This is more like a family tree obsession. What’s going on?’
Lyall fluffed his feathers. You should have been more careful. Only one book out at a time.
I ken. I ken. Too late now.
There wasn’t a good explanation for researching the family trees of all the main witch houses. She was in most of my classes and knew it couldn’t be a history project. But she knew that I grew up in foster care. That might work.
Try it, because you are not telling her about me.
As much as Lyall drove me mad, he hadn’t hidden his form for the hell of it. He had to have a reason. And he’d only revealed himself to me. I’d protect his secret.
I rubbed my neck. ‘I feel kind of stupid admitting it. You’re right. I’ve not been studying.’
Kaylee crossed her arms. ‘Then what have you been doing?’
‘I’ve been searching for my witch family. It was just me and Maw growing up, and then I was in foster care. I didn’t have a close family. I was hoping I might, I don’t know, see someone I recognised.’
Kaylee’s eyes softened. ‘I wish you’d said something. I’d have helped, halved the work. You could come to one of our meetings!’
She cannot tell her friends we’re researching your past.
Agreed.
I shook my head. ‘It’s personal for me.’
The very last thing I wanted was for the prejudiced gossips at her familiar support group to look into my family history.
‘I don’t understand, but okay, if that’s what you want.’ She flicked through a book, slower this time. ‘Did you find anything useful? Anyone who looked like you?’ She frowned. ‘You know they might not, if the connection is too far back? You might look like your human side. It’s not like you have a human familiar you can look for in the photos.’
My throat tightened. Lying sucked. ‘Aye, it felt like a needle in a haystack, but I had to try.’
‘Well, this explains why you caught the “studying” bug. But I thought you’d be far more into Shane McKee.’ She smacked her lips in a pretend kiss.
I groaned. ‘Let’s not talk about him.’
‘What happened? You’ve barely talked since you ditched the party.’
I shrugged.
She huffed. ‘Fine. But this is all the more reason for you to get your sorry arse into some nice clothes and out the door.’ She grabbed my hand, tugged me out of my seat, and stuffed my blanket into my bag. ‘Because this?’ She pinched the blanket. ‘This is sad.’
‘Rude.’
She shoved my pack into my arms and winked.
I shouldered the straps. ‘Please tell me it’s more than the familiar support group going? Because those guys don’t like me.’
‘They don’t know you.’
‘Come on. I have ears. I hear what they say about Animalis students.’ That girl refusing to help me before introduction to magic hadn’t been the only incident I’d had with Cognata witches.
‘Give them a chance. You could learn something.’
‘For my research? Maybe. But I’m not telling them anything. I’m there as your friend. Nothing else.’
‘Fine, but listen to the success stories. It can’t be the best method, thumbing your way through these old books.’
She has that much right.
Thanks. So helpful.
‘Okay.’
Kaylee grinned. ‘One of the dance guys begged to meet you the other day. Maybe they’ll come out.’
I frowned. ‘Who?’ I hadn’t done much to stick out since I got here.
‘Find out!’ Kaylee poked around on her phone, probably texting the poor guy.
I followed her, rolling my eyes at her enthusiasm. She and Finn could never meet, or they’d orchestrate the next five years of my life.
* * *
The walk was baltic, but the pub was swelteringly hot in comparison with a roaring fire in the main room and half- to one-litre helpings of amber lager to make sure that warmth got all the way inside. I was more of a spirit drinker, but I’d gone with the bartender’s recommendation, and it was a good one.
‘Kaylee! You made it!’ An older girl with dark hair waved from a corner.
The girls crowded around the table whispered as I followed Kaylee over. Jeez, they were even wearing their school jackets beneath their coats. Weird how familiars were the dividing line over income.
They huddled together to give Kaylee room.
I sat beside her. The girls glanced at me, but none of them said anything. Then I caught movement by the bar. A few guys were coming over with drinks. Two had a human familiar, but one had an animal familiar, a swan.
He sat beside me. ‘Ciao. I’m Gio. I started the term before you.’
And Gio was pretty. Braw in an effeminate way. His features were delicate, his skin smooth, and he moved with an almost weightless grace.
This must be the guy Kaylee was talking about. Not what I’d usually go for, though he was lovely to look at.
‘Bianca. Nice to meet you.’ I clasped his hand and shivered at the tingly warmth that sparked along my chilled fingers.
‘What brings you out?’ he asked.
‘Kaylee.’ I laughed. ‘That and I was going stir crazy in the library.’
‘Work getting to you already? We’re only a week into term.’
‘I’m not a big book person.’
‘So you spend all your time in the library?’
‘Thought I’d get it over with.’
He snorted. ‘I felt decades behind my first term. But you can catch up. The school is designed so we do.’
I smiled. He was a throwback, too. ‘I just hate that they’re going slow for me.’ Truth was, the schoolwork and the magic wasn’t so bad. But he didn’t need to know that wasn’t why I was in the library. ‘I’ll get there.’
‘Sì, naturalmente!’ He raised his glass.
I clinked it and tuned in to the other conversations. The girls were going through various dead ends in their familiar research, and the guys were offering suggestions they quickly discounted.
Kaylee kept glancing at me and Gio. I couldn’t tell if she wanted me to join their conversation or if she hoped I’d hit it off with Gio.
‘So what brings you out with people from the other house?’ I asked. ‘People don’t seem to mix much.’
Gio shrugged. ‘The guys are in dance. And when Kaylee said you might join us, I had to come.’ He looked to the ceiling and sighed. ‘Your dance at the initiation party was bellissima.’
I hid my cheeks. ‘You saw that?’
‘I couldn’t look away. You use air so wonderfully. It doesn’t come so easily to me. Please say you’ll come to practices.’
‘I… okay.’ If I wasn’t going to spend as much time in the library, I could go. And it’d be nice to practice magic with a fellow air user. Especially one so easy on the eyes. ‘I’ll
come. When’s the next session?’
He grinned. ‘Tomorrow night. An hour after dinner.’
‘Roped me into that one, huh?’
‘You bet!’ He slung his arm around my shoulders and pulled me into a quick, sideways hug.
I tried to relish in the warmth of his lithe body, but the feral eyes of a lynx kept coming back to me, and I almost groaned.
Gio pulled back. ‘Everything okay?’
‘Yes, sorry.’ But I didn’t think sleeping with Gio would fix my Shane obsession. I needed to go straight to the source.
Chapter 10
Gio, Kaylee, and some Cognata girls joined me for dinner the next day. The girls didn’t involve me in their conversation, but I didn’t mind, because I couldn’t take my eyes off Shane. A mixed group from each house sat with him, unusual outside friendships groomed through school groups and clubs. And as far as I knew, he hadn’t joined any.
‘You’ve heard the rumours, too, huh?’ Gio asked, following my eyeline.
‘What rumours?’
Gio laid his cutlery on his plate. ‘Cognata are obsessed with him. His father took him out of prep school five or six years ago and moved hours away from the witch community.’
‘That’s news?’
Gio shrugged. ‘Maybe that would have blown over. But ever since Shane got sorted into Animalis, he and his uncle aren’t speaking.’
‘The head, McKee?’ That’d go a long way to explaining Shane’s prickliness in class. But I didn’t think the head could be that black and white. He’d welcomed Animalis students with as much enthusiasm as Cognata.
‘One and the same.’
A Cognata witch joined Shane’s table. She spoke for a few minutes with some hushed asides to Shane, laying her hand on his arm in the cloying, bitchy way women gave pretend sympathy. He stiffened, his nose flaring. Cameron whispered in her ear, and she left, shoulders thrown back in a huff.
Shane glowered into his drink, rubbing the arm she’d touched. What the hell had she said? And was this sideshow why so many people gathered around his table? He should tell them all to do one.
‘Everything okay, Bee? You’re zoning out something terrible.’ Kaylee looked between me and Gio.