He set her in front of the sink to take a look at herself. “Oh!” she exclaimed. “Look at my cheek.” She ran the water, got some soap, and washed the black smudges off her cheek and hand.
She stared at herself in the mirror, her breathing seeming a little labored. “Why is this so hard?”
He grabbed her hairbrush off the counter and started brushing out her long hair. He didn’t need to, it wasn’t tangled, he just wanted to. “I guess because now we know how good it is when we’re really together, sharing the same space, sharing meals, sharing everything. We’ll get there again.”
She blinked rapidly. “I don’t want to cry. I’m an ugly crier, and my cheeks will be blotchy and my eyes all red and puffy at the party.”
He set down the brush, swept her hair to the side, and sank his teeth into the cord of her neck, wanting to short-circuit all the sad thoughts. She jolted. He sucked gently, and she sighed. “Ian.”
He turned her in his arms, feeling way too mushy for what he really needed to do, which was pull them both together and get them on the road. So he gripped her hair and kissed her hard and wet and deep until she moaned and clutched his shirt. He broke the kiss and growled in her ear, “Let’s go before I fuck you so hard you can’t walk straight and then you have to explain that to everyone at the party.”
She laughed, and he forced a smile back. He’d hoped to make her laugh, distract her at the very least, but her smile quickly dropped. She bit her lip, her eyes watery behind her glasses. “You’re so good to me,” she whispered.
His throat was tight, his chest aching. This was going to be hard. This separation. One of them had to keep it together or they’d never get through this party. He turned her toward the door and lightly smacked her ass. “Move it.”
She did.
“And leave your hair down,” he ordered both because he liked it that way and because he knew she relaxed when he went a little alpha. She always had extra hair bands in her purse.
She tossed her hair over her shoulder and sailed out the front door. He stopped, grabbed the purse she forgot off the foyer table, and followed her out.
~ ~ ~
By the time they showed up at their engagement party, Kate thought they were probably the least happy couple in the place. Ian opened the door to the Jorge Chavez Dance Studio; they stepped inside and were greeted by a chorus of “congratulations!” and people blowing party horns.
Kate grabbed Ian’s hand, overwhelmed by the good cheer, especially when she felt so far from celebratory. “Please say something appropriate on behalf of both of us.”
He lifted her hand with his. “Thanks, everyone!”
She looked around at the crowd. Amber and Barry had tracked down some of Ian’s friends from college and from his old work, along with her parents, his mom, some aunts, uncles, and cousins on both sides, a DJ, a caterer, and a ballroom dance instructor in a black suit, no tie, with what must’ve been his partner, an elderly woman wearing a skintight orange dress with sequins. It was too far a trip for Kate’s Chicago friends to attend. Ian’s brother Daniel couldn’t make it either but promised to be at the wedding. Who knew when a wedding would happen?
Amber rushed over to hug Kate. “Do you like the decorations?”
Kate blinked and looked around. She hadn’t noticed. It was beautiful. Three walls were draped with black velvet with tiny white stars. Strings of white lights ran along the perimeter of the room and in gentle arcs across the ceiling. The center of the room featured a shiny hardwood dance floor.
“I love it,” Kate said sincerely.
Amber beamed. “So the plan is, we all get a lesson in the waltz, then food, a champagne toast, and everyone can just dance and have fun after that. Oh! And don’t leave without taking your gifts.” She pointed over to a table with a large glass bowl full of envelopes.
Kate swallowed over the lump in her throat. Everyone was so happy for them, so generous, yet it felt like Ian was slowly being torn away from her. How was she going to get through this party without crying? She looked around for him and found him talking to his mom. Her parents approached Susan and Ian, and Ian gestured for her to join them.
“Thank you so much for all of this,” she told her sister in a strained voice.
“Are you okay, sweetie?” Amber asked.
Kate bit her quivering lower lip. “It’s just pretty emotional,” she whispered.
Amber nodded sagely. “Completely understand. You can cry if you want. I’ll help you fix your makeup after.”
“You know I’m an ugly crier.”
“And yet Ian would love you even with a bag over your head,” Amber said. She lifted a lock of Kate’s hair. “Love your hair down. I didn’t realize how long it is. So gorgeous, you!”
Kate couldn’t smile. “Thank you.” Ian communicated with a hard stare that he wanted Kate to join him. It was almost telepathic—hurry up, I’m dealing with your parents here. She could read him a lot better now that they’d lived together for a month. “See you,” she told Amber.
She hurried as fast as she could over to her parents in her heels. The shoes were only an inch high, but she hadn’t worn heels in a very long time. “Hi,” she said. “Thank you for coming.”
“Of course we would come,” her mom said. “I was an integral participant in planning the party logistics.”
“Yes, well, thank you for that too,” Kate said. Ian’s arm slipped around her shoulders.
“Congratulations,” her dad said. “When’s the wedding?”
“We don’t know yet,” Kate said. “I’ll be away for a year and…it’s kinda hard to…” She sucked in air; the room suddenly felt hot and entirely too crowded.
“Most likely when Kate gets back,” Ian finished for her. “Just have to work out the logistics of jobs, living space, all that good stuff; then we’ll be set.”
“Yes, quite right,” her dad said.
“You changed your earrings!” her mom exclaimed. “Shanna told us to wait four weeks. It’s only been two weeks.”
Kate pushed her hair back to better show off her new pearl earrings. “I don’t follow the rules. I’m a badass rebel.”
Ian threw back his head and laughed. She couldn’t help laughing along with him. The whole badass rebel thing was new for her.
Her mom’s brows drew together. “I hope you’re still focused on your work. You’re destined for great things. I read your last publication—”
“I don’t want to talk about work right now,” Kate said. “I just want to enjoy my party.” Not really. But her mom could go on and on about the importance of discipline and focus in the sciences, and Kate was just not in the mood.
Barry came over then, congratulating them both and handing Violet over to Kate’s mom. “Grandmom time,” Barry announced.
Violet hugged her grandmom and then poked her star earrings. Grandmom even cracked a smile.
“Amber needs my help with something,” Barry said. He winked at Kate and took off.
She wondered what Barry was up to, but then Ian grabbed her hand. “Come on, badass rebel, let’s go make the rounds.”
After they said hi and accepted congratulations from a lot of people, the DJ got on the mike and announced the bride and groom should report to the dance floor. Although technically they weren’t yet bride and groom, Kate took that as her cue. Of course, it was hard not to with Ian already pulling her along. They stopped in the center where the instructor and his partner were waiting.
“Hello, I’m Jorge, your instructor for the evening, and this beautiful woman is my wife and forever dance partner, Maggie.”
Ian shook Jorge’s hand. “Ian, the groom. And this is Kate.”
Jorge took Kate’s hand. “So nice to meet you,” he said, and then kissed the back of her hand. Whoa. He was very handsome for a middle-aged man. His black hair was slicked back, his golden tanned skin glowed, and he had a fit dancer’s body.
“You too,” Kate said. She giggled, and Ian’s head swiveled to her.
She shrugged.
Maggie curtsied. She looked older than her husband, but spry, her white hair stuck up in little spikes, her blue eyes were bright and sharp. “Congratulations, you two!”
“Thank you,” Kate and Ian said practically in unison.
Maggie eyed Ian. “You a showboat like your brother? We’ve seen him bust a move on many occasions.”
Ian smiled and shook his head. “Nope. Barry’s the performer. I only know the eighth-grade shuffle.”
“Ah, well. You are in for a treat!” Maggie exclaimed. “Tell him, foxy!” she said to her foxy husband.
Jorge inclined his head. “It’s a box step. I’ll demonstrate with Maggie, and then you’ll try. Once you feel comfortable, we’ll do it with music.”
Kate and Ian watched as Jorge took Maggie’s hand and rested his other hand on her back just below her shoulder blade. “And one, two, three,” he said, moving them in a box step. Kate was pleased to see it really was a box. Forward, side, side, backward, side, side, a perfect geometric square. This would be easy.
After they danced for a short time, Jorge stopped and turned to her and Ian. “Now, you.”
She stood in front of Ian. He took her hand and pressed his other hand to her back. Jorge moved her hand from Ian’s arm to his shoulder. “Good,” Jorge said. “Now, Ian, you lead, your hand on her back guides her, the hand holding hers is the lightest touch.”
“Sometimes the hips take the lead too!” Maggie chortled.
“This is true,” Jorge said with a hot look for his wife. He turned back to them. “Give it a try.”
Kate had never had a dance lesson, never done a sport, so it was understandable that she stepped on Ian’s feet a lot and tripped once. After the fourth toe crunch, Ian pulled away, wincing. Kate’s cheeks burned, and she glanced over to Jorge for his reaction. Maggie had already left to talk to the caterer, the red-headed chef Shane O’Hare. Everyone knew Shane from his ice cream shop in town. She kinda wished she could join them.
Jorge rushed over, a patient smile on his face. “This is no problem. May I suggest you remove your heels? They seem to be affecting your footwork.”
“Yes,” Kate said with some relief. Her heels were killing her after an hour of being on her feet. She crossed the dance floor and set them out of the way. When she returned, Jorge was in deep conversation with Ian. They got quiet once she got to them. “Everything okay?”
“It’s all good,” Ian said, pulling her flush against him, his hand on her back. They were pelvis to pelvis, and she flushed with heat. He took her other hand for the waltz position. “We’re going to try once more,” Ian said, “and then we’ll do it to music while Jorge invites everyone to join us.”
“Oh, that would be good,” she whispered. “I feel like everyone’s watching us.”
He glanced around. “Some are, some aren’t. Ready?”
“Sure.”
“And one, two, three,” Jorge counted for them.
And this time they really waltzed. Or Ian did, anyway. There was no way for her to mess up because his entire body pressed along hers and he practically lifted her with him. He took her all around the dance floor, making them look graceful and gloriously romantic. Her prince.
When they finished, everyone applauded.
Ian grinned at her. “Smooth moves, Kate.”
“That was all you and you know it,” she whispered.
He dipped her suddenly over his arm and slowly pulled her back up.
“Ian,” she breathed, her gaze locked on his. The air sizzled between them.
Maggie clapped, breaking the spell. “Everyone join the happy couple.”
The music started, and everyone danced with them in their own version of waltz. Barry danced her sister around beautifully like they’d done this many times before. Susan claimed Violet for a dance, and Kate witnessed her parents dancing for the first time ever. Her parents talked the entire time, probably about work, but they seemed happy. Maggie and Jorge managed to get everyone on the dance floor and then joined in.
She gazed into Ian’s warm loving brown eyes and tried to memorize every detail about the moment. His strong arms, his large hand splayed on her back possessively, his scent woodsy with a hint of citrus, the small crooked smile that said he loved her and would do dirty things to her later.
It was the best time.
A mushy heart-squeezing celebration.
The last best memory to get her through the dark times ahead.
Chapter Seventeen
Ian was damn tired of saying goodbye to Kate. When he’d first suggested they try a long-distance relationship, he hadn’t counted on how close they would get during their brief times together, making each goodbye that much more painful. He’d dropped her off at the airport the Monday after their engagement party and Kate had cried. Not like a few tears leaking out either. Big sobbing tears like he’d never seen from her. It killed him. Nothing he said soothed her. No amount of promising to stay in touch or reminders that he’d see her at the end of August made a difference.
She drifted further away from him once she got back to Chicago. Over the next three months, Kate threw herself into her work, needing to do as much as possible in preparation for her time in Geneva. She didn’t want to do phone sex and had informed him she went off the pill, not because she planned on sleeping with other people, because she planned on being celibate for the next year. A true scholar focused only on work.
It was like she’d already said goodbye to him.
He couldn’t visit her in Chicago due to a lack of vacation time, but he damn sure was going to see her at his brother’s house before she flew out to Geneva. The day finally arrived. A Saturday, the last weekend in August, and her flight was early Sunday morning. He pulled into the driveway of Barry and Amber’s house, grabbed the bouquet of red roses from the passenger seat, and headed to the door.
He knocked, and Barry answered. “Those for me?” his brother asked. “How sweet!”
“Ha-ha,” Ian said, pushing past him. “Where’s Kate? Kate!” he called.
She appeared from the kitchen with Violet on her hip. His heart lodged in his throat. For a weird hallucinatory moment, he felt like he’d come home to his wife with his daughter on her hip.
“Hi,” Kate said softly.
“Fwowerth!” Violet exclaimed, bouncing a little and pointing at the bouquet.
He closed the distance between them. “I missed you so much.”
Kate blinked rapidly. “I missed you too. Are those for me?”
“Yes.”
She set Violet down, and he wrapped Kate in his arms, at long last. She rested her head on his chest and let out a sigh.
One day. That was all they had before another goodbye.
He pulled back and handed her the roses. She buried her nose in them. “Thank you. I guess I’ll have to leave them here tomorrow, but—”
“You can enjoy them today,” Amber said, coming downstairs. “Hi, Ian.”
“Hey,” he said.
Amber went to his side and hugged him. “I’ll put these in a vase for you,” she said, taking the bouquet.
“Congratulations,” Ian said, belatedly remembering Amber was newly pregnant.
Amber beamed. “Thank you.”
“She’s due in March,” Kate said. “The new baby might even share a birthday with Violet.”
Violet clung to her mom’s leg, looking worried. “And congratulations to you too,” he told Violet. “You’re going to be a big sister, which is awesome. I’m sure you’ll get a big sister present from the baby.” He’d send one anyway.
Violet’s brown eyes widened. “The baby get present? Yay!”
“We’ll see,” Barry said.
Ian made a small gesture to his brother to let him know he’d be sending one.
“Definitely,” Amber said. “How exciting to be a big sister! I am too, to Aunt Kate.”
“Best big sister there is,” Kate said.
Violet looked from Kate to
her mom and beamed. She let go of Amber’s leg and went to play with her dollhouse.
They spent the day playing with Violet, hanging out with Barry and Amber, and talking about Kate’s setup in Geneva. She had a studio apartment in a building where a lot of single scientists roomed. He guessed that Nate would also be rooming in the building, but didn’t bring it up. He didn’t want to think about it. Kate hadn’t said boo about the fact that he worked with his ex, Morgan, even more now that funding had increased on her project. And so he would do the same. Even if he hated it. Anyway, she didn’t have to worry about Morgan, who was apparently sleeping with Shawn, the engineer that shared a workspace with her project. Ian could care less as long as they both got their work done.
Kate told them more about the particle accelerator where she’d be running her experiments, which was larger than he’d realized, a twenty-seven-mile ring of superconducting magnets underground between Switzerland and France. The particles moved at the speed of light. No wonder Kate wanted to run experiments there. Nothing like it was available stateside.
They had a quiet dinner at home, and then finally he and Kate went to bed a little early to spend time together before her early flight.
He pulled her close in the dark of the bedroom, both of them naked under the covers, and just held her. He’d so missed her curvy little body. And not just for sex. He’d gotten used to her curling up against his side during their month of living together. He’d had to buy a body pillow and put it in her place to get any sleep after she went back to Chicago.
“It’s different now, isn’t it?” she whispered. “I mean, between us.”
“Because we got in deep.”
“Maybe too deep,” she said softly. “It hurts to see you.”
Unfortunately, he knew what she meant. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see her, but it did hurt because then she’d be ripped away from him again, taking another piece of his heart with her. Too many more goodbyes and he’d be walking around with a hollow chest.
He slid his hand into her hair, cupping her soft cheek, and kissed her. He pulled back when he felt a tear touch his cheek. “Don’t cry,” he said, brushing the tears from her cheeks. “Please. Let’s just forget about tomorrow and enjoy right now.”
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