Constance Sherwood: An Autobiography of the Sixteenth Century
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of the prince's age, and of his height;to the which he did answer, "About your majesty's own height." But herhighness would not be so put off, and willed the ambassador to writefor the precise measurement of the prince's stature.
"She will never marry," quoth Mr. Wells, "but only amuse the French court and her council with further negotiations touching thisnew suitor, as heretofore anent the archduke and Monsieur. But I wouldto God her majesty were well married, and to a Catholic prince; whichwould do us more good than anything else which can be thought of."
"What news did you hear, sir, of Mr. Felton?" Mistress Ward asked.Upon which their countenances fell; and one of them answered that thatgentleman had been racked the day before, but steadily refused, thoughin the extremity of torture, to name his accomplices; and would giveher majesty no title but that of the Pretender; which they said wasgreatly to be regretted, and what no other Catholic had done. But whenhis sentence was read to him, for that he was to die on Friday, hedrew from his finger a ring, which had diamonds in it, and was worthfour hundred pounds, and requested the Earl of Sussex to give it tothe queen, in token that he bore her no ill-will or malice, but ratherthe contrary.
Mr. Wells said he was a gentleman of very great heart and nobledisposition, but for his part he would as lief this ring had beensold, and the money bestowed on the poorer sort of prisoners inNewgate, than see it grace her majesty's finger; who would thus playthe hangman's part, who inherits the spoils of such as he doth put todeath. But the others affirmed it was done in a Christian manner, andso greatly to be commended; and that Mr. Felton, albeit he wassomewhat rash in his actions, and by some titled Don Magnifico, byreason of a certain bravery in his style of dress and fashion ofspeaking, which smacked of Monsieur Traveller, was a right worthygentleman, and his death a blow to his friends, amongst whom therewere some, nevertheless, to be found who did blame him for the actwhich had brought him into trouble. Mistress Ward cried, that such asfell into trouble, be the cause ever so good, did always find thosewho would blame them. Mr. Lacy said, one should not cast himself intodanger wilfully, but when occasion offered take it with patience.Polly replied, that some were so prudent, occasions never came tothem. And then those two fell to disputing, in a merry but withalsharp fashion. As he did pick his words, and used new-fangled terms,and she spoke roundly and to the point, methinks she was the nimblestin this encounter of wit.
Meanwhile Mr. Wells asked Mr. Congleton if he had had news from thenorth, where much blood was spilt since the rising; and he apprehendedthat his kinsmen in Richmondshire should suffer under the last orderssent to Sir George Bowes by my Lord Sussex. But Mr. Congleton didminister to him this comfort, that if they were noted wealthy, and hadfreeholds, it was the queen's special commandment they should not beexecuted, but two hundred of the commoner sort to lose their lives ineach town; which was about one to each five.
"But none of note?" quoth Mr. Wells.
"None which can pay the worth of their heads," Mr. Congleton replied.
"And who, then, doth price them?" asked Kate, in a languishing voice.
"Nay, sister," quoth Polly, "I warrant thee they do price themselves;for he that will not pay well for his head must needs opine he hath aworthless one."
Upon which Mr. Lacy said to Kate, "One hundred angels would not payfor thine, sweet Kate."
"Then she must needs be an archangel, sir," quoth Polly, "if she be ofgreater worth than one hundred angels."
"Ah, me!" cried Kate, very earnestly, "I would I had but half onehundred gold-pieces to buy me a gown with!"
"Hast thou not gowns enough, wench?" asked her father. "Methought thouwert indifferently well provided in that respect."
"Ah, but I would have, sir, such a velvet suit as I did see someweeks back at the Italian house in Cheapside, where the ladies of thecourt do buy their vestures. It had a border the daintiest I everbeheld, all powdered with gold and pearls. Ruffiano said it was therarest suit he had ever made; and he is the Queen of France's tailor,which Sir Nicholas Throgmorton did secretly entice away, by thequeen's desire, from that court to her own."
"And what fair nymph owns this rare suit, sweetest Kate?" Mr. Lacyasked. "I'll warrant none so fair that it should become her, or ratherthat she should become it, more than her who doth covet it."
"I know not if she be fair or foul," quoth Kate, "but she is the LadyMary Howard, one of the maids of honor of her majesty, and so may wearwhat pleaseth her."
"By that token of the gold and pearls," cried Mr. Wells, "I doubt notbut 'tis the very suit anent which the court have been wagging theirtongues for the last week; and if it be so, indeed, Mistress Kate, youhave no need to envy the poor lady that doth own it."
Kate protested she had not envied her, and taxed Mr. Wells withunkindness that he did charge her with it; and for all he could saywould not be pacified, but kept casting up her eyes, and the tearsstreaming down her lovely cheeks. Upon which Mr. Lacy cried:
"Sweet one, thou hast indeed no cause to envy her or any one else,howsoever rare or dainty their suits may be; for thy teeth are morebeauteous than pearls, and thine hair more bright than the purestgold, and thine eyes more black and soft than the finest velvet, whichnature so made that we might bear their wonderful shining, which elsehad dazzled us:" and so went on till her weeping was stayed, and thenMr. Wells said:
"The lady who owned that rich suit, which I did falsely andfeloniously advance Mistress Kate did envy, had not great or longcomfort in its possession; for it is very well known at court, andhence bruited in the city, what passed at Richmond last weekconcerning this rare vesture. It pleased not the queen, who thought itdid exceed her own. And one day her majesty did send privately for it,and put it on herself, and came forth into the chamber among theladies. The kirtle and border was far too short for her majesty'sheight, and she asked every one how they liked her new fancied suit.At length she asked the owner herself if it was not made too short andill-becoming; which the poor lady did presently consent to. Upon whichher highness cried: 'Why, then, if it become me not as being tooshort, I am minded it shall never become thee as being too fine, so itfitteth neither well.' This sharp rebuke so abashed the poor lady thatshe never adorned her herewith any more."
"Ah," cried Mr. Congleton, laughing, "her majesty's bishops do come byreproofs as well as her maids. Have you heard how one Sunday, lastApril, my Lord of London preached to the queen's majesty, and seemedto touch on the vanity of decking the body too finely. Her grace toldthe ladies after the sermon, that if the bishop held more discourse onsuch matters she would fit him for heaven, but he should walk thitherwithout a staff and leave his mantle behind him."
"Nay," quoth Mr. Wells, "but if she makes such as be Catholics tasteof the sharpness of the rack, and the edge of the axe, she doth thentreat those of her own way of thinking with the edge of her wit andthe sharpness of her tongue. 'Tis reported, Mr. Congleton, I know notwith what truth, that a near neighbor of yours has been served with aletter, by which a new sheep is let into his pastures."
"What," cried Polly, "is Pecora Campi to roam amidst the roses, and goin and out at his pleasure through the bishop's gate? The 'sweet lids'have then danced away a large slice of the Church's acres. But what, Ipray you, sir, did her majesty write?"
"Even this," quoth her father, "I had it from Sir RobertArundell: 'Proud Prelate! you know what you were before I made you,and what you are now. If you do not immediately comply with myrequest, I will unfrock you, by God!--ELIZABETH R.'"
"Our good neighbor," saith Polly, "must show a like patience with Job,and cry out touching his bishopric, 'The queen did give it; the queendoth take it away; the will of the queen be done.'"
"He is like to be encroached upon yet further by yon cunning SirChristopher," Mr. Wells said; "I'll warrant Ely Place will soon beHatton Garden."
"Well, for a neighbor," answered Polly, "I'd as soon have the queen'slids as her hedge-bishop, and her sheep as her shepherd. 'Tis not allfor love of her sweet dancer her majesty doth despoil him. She never,'tis sai
d, hath forgiven him that he did remonstrate with her forkeeping a crucifix and lighted tapers in her own chapel, and that herfool, set on by such as were of the same mind with him, did one dayput them out."
In suchlike talk the time was spent; and when the gentlemen had takenleave, we retired to rest; and being greatly tired, I slept heavily,and had many quaint dreams, in which past scenes and present objectswere curiously blended with the tales I had read on the journey, andthe discourse I had heard that evening. When I awoke in the morning,my thoughts first flew to my father, of whom I had a very