by Esme Devlin
Tormented
Esme Devlin
Contents
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Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Also by Esme Devlin
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Indifference is more truly the opposite of love than hate is, for we can both love and hate the same person at the same time, but we cannot both love and be indifferent to the same person at the same time.
Peter Kreeft
Chapter 1
Lacey
I walk along the school hallway with my eyes low on the ground. The surrounding noise is overwhelming, students laughing and chatting, lockers slamming, and shoes squeaking against the polished linoleum. There is nothing worse than a first day at a new school. This would be the fifth time I was doing this.
Today is about surviving and getting through it. In the earlier years, it had been so easy. At age seven, it’s perfectly appropriate to tap someone on the shoulder and ask, “Do you want to be friends with me?”
I’d met some of my best friends that way.
Friends I’d never see again.
Now though, that isn’t the way things work. Now I keep my head down, draw no attention to myself, and I’ve already located the toilets where I plan to have my lunch. I just want to get through this term and finish with school for good.
I glance up at the row of lockers, trying to gauge how much further I have to keep going before I find my own… K57. Shit, I must have walked past it. I pull into the side to get out of the traffic and take a tentative look around.
In the email, the school secretary said there was a strict uniform policy in force. I glance down at my clothes — plaid skirt below the knee, tie high at the neck, blouse fully buttoned and a thick green blazer. None of the kids in the hall are even remotely following the rules, and I have a sinking feeling that in doing so I’ve made myself stick out like a sore thumb. They would never have got away with flouting the rules so brazenly in my last school.
I turn and head back down the hall to find my locker. I fling my books in and pull out my timetable. English. The office gave me a map, and I unfold it slyly inside my locker. I don’t know what part of the building English is in, but I have no desire to be the wanker new kid walking around with my nose in a map.
Okay, walk to the end of the hall, turn left, up two flights of stairs, turn right, and then it should be the third door. Fuck. End of the hall, left…
“Lacey? It is Lacey, right?”
A deep voice startles me and I drop the map in the locker before turning around. Wow. I swallow down the lump in my throat.
“Uh, yeah. It’s Lacey… sorry, do I know you?”
“No, we’ve not been introduced yet. I’m Liam McGuiness, your father has just taken on a position at my father's company?”
“Oh, right! It’s nice to meet you,” I say through a smile, holding out my hand to shake his.
Liam clasps my hand in his and brings it up to his mouth, placing a gentle kiss on it. That was… different. He must have caught the puzzled look on my now flushed face because he quickly explains, “We don’t shake hands here.”
I draw my eyebrows together in a WTF way and he continues, “Well, some folks do, I suppose. But in this town, it means something more than a formal greeting. What class do you have?”
Deciding my WTF face isn’t the most attractive one, I quickly smile. “English.”
“I’ll walk you there.” He holds out his arm. I pick up my textbooks and slip my arm under his while he closes my locker for me.
“Thank you,” I say, glancing up at him before quickly looking away. He is handsome, in a polished, angelic type of way. His skin is smooth, his lips full and he wears his blonde hair swept back off his face. I think his eyes are blue or possibly green. I didn't look at them much. Eye contact is an awkward problem for me.
“So, how are you finding Elginvale High?”
“I’m not sure yet, to be honest. It’s all a bit…” I glance around the common area to where younger kids are playing a bottle flipping game, behind them a group is pushing someone into a janitor’s closet.
“New?” he suggests through a smile.
“Yeah,” I agree, smiling back.
“You’ll get used to it.”
I giggle, because… I don’t know why. He makes me uncomfortable, though not in a bad way. He seems nice, charming, handsome. He has all the makings of a popular guy, and that immediately makes me nervous because popular guys never look twice at me.
“Mrs Hunter? This is Lacey Tyler.”
Mrs Hunter looks up from her desk and smiles.
“Oh, hi Lacey! I was expecting you. I see Liam here has delivered you safely.”
I smile and nod. My cheeks are aching from all the friendly smiles I’ve been doing this morning, but I want to make a good impression.
“Come in, find a seat.” She gestures around the classroom and I drop Liam’s arm before making my way in. “Thanks Liam,” she calls as he turns to leave.
“Not a problem!” He flashes her a smile and then glances to me before he makes off down the hall.
The lesson goes by quickly and I admit I struggled to concentrate. I couldn’t stop thinking about Liam. By the time the bell rings to signal morning break, I’m already wondering if I should try to accidentally seek him out and bump into him. It would beat sitting alone somewhere. Oh god, what if he sees me sitting alone?
No, the weather is nice enough. I’ll just head straight outside and find a quiet place to be inconspicuous.
I perch myself on a wall at the end of the building and rustle around in my bag, finding the granola bar I packed this morning a little crushed. It still tastes fine. I wish I’d had the good sense to pick up a bottle of water from the vending machine before I came out, but I’m not about to go back in. I’ll pick one up on the way to my next class. Where is my next class? I’m trying to find my timetable when a girl pops herself down on the wall next to me.
“I’m Stevie,” she announces.
I turn my head to face her. She is pretty. Chocolate hair, and with way more makeup on than my last school would have allowed. Are those false eyelashes?
“I’m Lacey,” I reply, remembering not to hold out my hand, but still unsure why.
“I know who you are. The whole school knows who you are now.” Her tone isn’t overly friendly but not standoffish either. I can’t work out if we are making friends, or if she is here just for something to do.
I look at her questioningly.
“Liam walked you to class. News travels fast around here,” she explains.
“Why would that be news?”
She shrugs. “Everything Liam does is news.”
I feel as if I’m missing something.
“I think our dad’s work together. I’m sure he was just being friendly,” I tell her.
“Your dad works for Kalvin Gas? For Liam’s father?”
“Yes… well, I think so. He’s the new MD. So I suppose they’re like partners.”
Stevie looks at me sideways, something akin to a frown marring her face. “Interesti
ng.”
It really isn’t. My dad has done this for as long as I can remember. Moving from company to company, never staying for longer than a few years. I sometimes wondered if he was just shit at the job, but if he was then why would these companies keep taking him on? I don’t know what he does, but I guess it’s some kind of business transformation or turnaround type thing. He always follows the money, which means I have to follow it too, and I’ve been uprooted more times than I care to remember. I lost the urge to even try finding meaningful friendships. What was the point?
I didn’t expect this place to be any different. But then again, maybe it could be? This is my final year. After this is over, I won’t have to follow my dad anymore. I can move out, make a life for myself. Maybe I should give this friendship thing a go? What do you even say to a potential friend?
“So… what is there to do around here except school?”
“Depends on who you are, I guess.” Her frown now gone, she licks her lips and presses them to her bottle of water. I watch her drink, remembering how thirsty I am. The granola hasn’t helped with that at all.
“What do you mean by that?” I ask.
She puts the lid back on her bottle and jumps off the wall. “It’s complicated. More to explain than we have time for now, the bell’s about to go.”
I jump off too and grab my bag, following behind her. Thinking this might be my best chance at a friend, I call, “Can I meet you for lunch?”
Stevie stops in her tracks and then turns around to face me. “Sure, why not? I’ll meet you back here.”
I nod and blurt out a thank you that sounds ridiculously needy, but she’s already walking back into the school.
Pulling out my timetable, I groan as I realize I have maths next. Not my best subject. But at least I’d kinda sort of made a friend or two.
❖
The bell rings to signal lunch, and I head to the canteen to grab a sandwich before meeting Stevie. Still trying to find my bearings, I stop momentarily in the common area and look around trying to pick out someone I can follow. Everyone is going in different directions.
I catch sight of Liam in the crowd and he grins as we lock eyes.
“I wondered if I’d bump into you,” he says as he approaches. “Will you join me for lunch?”
Lunch? I feel the heat spread across my cheeks and pray that it’s not obvious I’m blushing. “Oh, I’m actually meeting someone. Sorry!”
“Damn it!” he says jokingly, over-exaggerating his disappointment. “I knew I should have asked you this morning. How about a lift home from school?”
“Yeah, that would be great, thank you. I’m going car shopping this weekend… made no sense getting the old one imported.”
Why do I feel the need to justify me not having a car to this guy?
“Is that all you have on at the weekend? There’s a party on Friday night… nothing too crazy. I hope. Anyway, I wondered if you’d be up for it?”
Like a date? Or like a pity invite because I’m the new kid and our fathers work together? I hope it’s the former, but I’m not about to ask him.
“Sounds good, I have no plans… obviously.” I roll my eyes, making him chuckle.
“Great, well, I’ll meet you out the front after school, okay?”
I nod and hear my name being called from down the hall. Stevie is waving her arms at me to come over.
“That’s your lunch date?” Liam asks, nodding his head in her direction.
“Yeah, she seems nice,” I reply.
“I won’t keep you then. Enjoy,” Liam says, giving a half smile and turning back down the hall.
I gather my books which have slipped down in my clammy grip and go to meet Stevie.
“What did he want?” She motions her head to the place Liam had just stood. She falls into step beside me and we walk to what I assume will be the canteen.
“Well, lunch — which I obviously refused. And then he offered me a ride home after school, and then he invited me to a party on Friday night.”
“Kelly Glover’s party?” She looks at me and raises a perfectly powdered eyebrow.
“He didn’t say. Do you know her?”
“I know her,” she says with a shrug. She’s weaving in and out of the crowds expertly and I struggle to keep.
“Are you going to the party?” I ask.
“I wasn’t planning to.”
“Why not? Do you have something else on?”
We’re in the line queueing for sandwiches when she turns around to face me.
“I told you earlier, different people do different things. I don’t really associate with Liam’s crowd,” she shrugs again while she fumbles in her school bag and retrieves her purse.
“Why not?” I feel like I’m being annoying asking twenty-one different questions, but it doesn’t feel like she’s answering any of them properly.
“I try not to associate with any of the crowds. Ham and cheese, please.” She hands a five pound note to the lady who is serving behind the counter and then slips the change into her back pocket before murmuring “As your only friend here, I’d advise you not to either.”
What does she mean by that?
“The same, please,” I say to the lady.
I wait until we’re outside and sitting on the wall before I ask her anything else.
“What did you mean back there?”
Stevie sighs and takes a bite of her sandwich. “You will think I’m crazy and probably run a mile away from me. Or worse, you won’t believe me,” she says when she’d finished chewing.
“I’m not going to run,” I laugh. “As you said, you’re pretty much my only friend.”
She smiles and looks down at the food in her hands. “This school isn’t like other schools.”
“You don’t say?” I reply sarcastically. The general lack of discipline set it apart from any school I’d ever been to before. Though in fairness, we usually went private. This is the first time I’ve gone to a public school.
“No, I mean it. The way I see it, there are groups. Secrets. Shit you don’t want to get involved in. There’s something about Liam. Half the kids in the school worship him, and the other half despise him.”
“What half are you?”
“I’m part of the other half, the ones who keep their heads down and stay away from it all,” she says, glancing over at me through her long lashes.
Three halves? Makes absolutely no sense to me.
“Why do so many people despise him?” I wonder.
“Family stuff, I think. Liam’s family aren’t well liked by some of the locals here. His father moved in and set up business, gave the locals competition. The locals are powerful in more ways than I care to know about. Some of their kids go to this school.”
“It all sounds really petty to me.”
“Well, I try to stay away from it. I’d just be careful, that’s all I’m saying. Your dad’s job already involves your family with Liam’s, nothing you can do about that now… but if I was you I wouldn’t go around cementing those ties for the world to see.”
I nod, thinking it’s best I probably don’t debate with her about it. So what if half the school despises Liam for something his father did years ago? It’s not like I got to be fussy with friends. Or potential boyfriends, to be more exact. I flush at the thought of him ever being that.
“Any-who… what’s your story? How did you end up here?” Stevie goes back to eating her sandwich, and I wash down my own with a bottle of water.
“My dad travels loads for work. We just moved here. I was at an English-speaking boarding school in Asia.”
“And now you’ve ended up here,” Stevie giggles. “That’s quite the leap down.”
I laugh. “It doesn’t seem that bad. I was told it rained all the time, and I’d be bored shitless with nothing to do… but we’re eating lunch outside and invited to a party so I guess the rumors weren’t all true.”
“Ha! Welcome to our one and only day of summer this year…�
�� she chuckles sarcastically.
“Will you come on Friday?” I ask her.
“Why are you so desperate to go? Don’t tell me you fancy Liam!” She gives me a shove and I smile at her.
“No! I mean he’s nice, but no. I’ve just never really been to a party before. I mean not since I was a kid.”
“Jesus. Fine,” she concedes.
“You’ll come with me?”
“Sure. You can come over to mine and get ready if you like?” she offers.
“That would be good… for starters — I have no idea what to wear,” I tell her, shaking my head.
“I’ve got plenty that’ll fit ya. Just promise me you won’t go getting all involved with Liam. At least not until you know how this place works.”
I fiddle with my silver necklace and agree to her condition. I don’t know why she is so uptight about it. Maybe they have a history together, and this is her way of telling me? I wonder if I can slip that into conversation with Liam on the way home. I exchange numbers with Stevie and we head back into the school ready for afternoon class.
❖
After class, I stand at the front of the school waiting on Liam, twisting my necklace around in my fingers and shifting my weight from foot to foot. I’m not good with things like this.
I can feel eyes on me as kids pour out from the double doors and make their way across the car park. I try to look at nothing in particular, the bike racks, the bins, the potted plants. In the corner of my eye I notice a group of boys — perhaps five or six of them — and they seem to stare straight at me. I glance in their direction and confirm my suspicions.
I can’t meet their gaze for long. Something about them troubles me. They’re dressed all in black, some of them well over six foot tall. Why are they looking at me? Have they never seen a “new girl” before?