by Tessa Dare
Page 46
“I should hope not. ” Ashworth threw a glance in Lily and Faraday’s direction. “Er … not that there’s anything wrong with that. ”
Julian laughed. The awkwardness was so thick between them, there was just nothing else for it. “For God’s sake, leave off, the both of you. Go play midwife. Thanks for nothing. ”
“That’s more like it. ”
“And send us word of the babe,” he called after them.
After they’d gone, Lily pulled back from Faraday’s embrace. The man offered her a handkerchief from his breast pocket, and she used it to dab at her eyes. “Will you both ride back with me in the carriage?” she asked, looking from Faraday to Julian. “We have just enough daylight remaining to talk along the way. ”
They agreed and made their way to the Warren’s gatehouse. On the other side of the gate, Lily’s driver and coach waited patiently. On their way out of town, they stopped at the inn to make arrangements for Julian and Faraday’s mounts.
Back in the coach, Julian pushed back the drapes from the window glass to let in as much light as possible. He and Lily situated themselves at opposite ends of the front-facing seat, and Faraday sat across from them. In this manner, they formed a triangle, so as best to facilitate conversation.
“So if you rode out here on horseback,” Julian began, “you must not have been so gravely injured. ”
Faraday replied, “I was gravely injured indeed. No deceit there. But I worked hard to recover from my wounds. I was determined to regain my strength. ”
“But you led us to believe you were still an invalid. ”
“I was planning to return to London anyway. When your friend Ashworth showed up in Cornwall, I reckoned I might as well ride with him. ”
“And stay at Morland’s house?”
Faraday shrugged. “There’s been some curiosity about the duke amongst my superiors. He wasn’t raised on English soil, you know, and he’s always been a recluse. I couldn’t pass up the chance to stay in his house. If I’d uncovered something shocking, it surely would have meant a promotion. ” He sighed. “As it turns out, Morland is the furthest thing from shocking. He’s rather a bore, and quaintly devoted to his wife. Now his ward, on the other hand … she is interesting. ”
“Can we please go back,” Lily said, “and begin at the beginning? I want to understand what happened. ”
“The beginning. ” Faraday rested his head against the tufted seatback and sighed. “Yes. The beginning was lovely. ”
“How did you meet?” she asked.
“The club, of course. Back during the war, I was given interesting assignments. Lately, it’s all stuff and nonsense. What’s this ‘Stud Club’ about, my superiors wanted to know. An elite membership, open to anyone with luck? It sounded suspicious to them. They thought there must be something more behind it. So I won a token, gained entrée to the club. And I learned there was nothing behind it, except the best, most kindhearted man I’ve ever known. Divinely handsome, to boot. ”
Julian glanced at his wife, amazed by how she was taking this all in stride. His own thoughts were still cycling through a sequence that went much like this: Leo, a molly? No. Surely not. But it must be. Lily says it’s so. Truly, though. Leo?
So shocking, this new intimation of his friend’s private life. He didn’t want to let it change his high opinion of Leo, but Julian couldn’t help but wonder if he’d ever truly known the man.
“Did you know?” he asked Lily. “Of Leo’s …?” God, he couldn’t even finish the sentence.
“That he preferred men to women, romantically? Yes, I’ve known since we were youths. We never really discussed it, but he was my twin brother. How could I fail to notice something like that? I wish I’d been brave enough to talk to him. I … I just had no idea what to say. ”
“He struggled with it, too,” Faraday said. “Living outside the rules comes easily to a man like me. But it didn’t come as easily to Leo. He was a very honest, loyal sort. ”
“I worried about him so,” Lily said. “Always surrounded by friends, but isolated at the same time. ” She looked to Julian. “For the longest time, I thought you must know. You didn’t even suspect?”
“No,” Julian answered numbly. No, he hadn’t. He’d been too busy guarding his own secrets to wonder about Leo’s. But he understood well the strain of presenting one face to the world while living a different life entirely. Under that burden, Julian had grown bitter and vengeful. But Leo was a better man than he. Perhaps this explained his friend’s endless quest to make everyone around him feel accepted and at ease.
His hands clenched in useless fists. He wanted to go drag the river for Stone and Macleod’s corpses, revive them, then kill them all over again.
“Let me guess,” Lily said to Faraday. “It started more than two summers ago. That’s where Leo was that July. With you, not his Eton classmates. ”
Faraday nodded in confirmation. “He hated lying to you, but it seemed the only prudent course. We went to—”
“Cornwall,” Julian finished, finally piecing it together. “That house. You said you’d spent a pleasant holiday there once. With a … with a blond. ” And he’d never said that blond was a woman. Faraday had just let them assume.
“Very sharp, Mr. Bellamy. High marks to you. After Leo’s death, I returned there to convalesce. And to grieve. My bones healed faster than my heart, as it happened. ” His eyes slid to the window. “That particular organ is still not all of a piece. ”
“But the letters,” Lily said. “They made it sound as though you’d ended it. ”
“Leo ended it. Last spring. ”
“Did you have a falling-out?”
“No. Not exactly. ” He tossed his hat aside and pushed a hand through his hair. “He’d learned the truth of my … profession, as it were. Leo was always scrupulous about discretion. He wanted to protect you from scandal, Lily, and he was doubly concerned about exposing you to danger. Too ironic, in the end. ”
“So the attack in Whitechapel was related to your profession?” Julian asked. “Enemies of yours?”
Faraday shook his head. “No. Nothing so logical as that. Stone and Macleod were just a pair of bloodthirsty brutes, riled up on liquor and violence after the boxing match. They weren’t out to get me specifically, nor Leo, nor you. They were just bullies looking for amusement, and they found it. It’s a time-honored pastime, roughing up the mollies. ”
“Oh, God,” Lily said. “That’s so horrible. ”
Horrible, Julian silently agreed. Also despicable, cowardly, and nauseating. But all too believable. He’d grown up on the streets. He’d seen such beatings before.
Faraday tapped the flat side of his fist against the carriage wall. “Such a stupid reason for a good man to die. That’s the hardest part to move past, the senselessness of it all. ”
He’d taken the words from Julian’s mouth. Others had insisted all along that Leo’s death was the result of random violence. Julian just hadn’t been able to accept it. Not only because of his own secrets and fears, but because he hadn’t wanted to believe Leo was taken from this earth for no earthly justification, save some brigands’ drunken sport. He wanted a reason.
But there wasn’t one. There never would be. Damn it all to hell.
Faraday sighed. “I can only imagine you must blame me. I blame myself. When Leo ended it, I didn’t take it well. First I lost my token to Morland, out of spite. I heard the two of you making plans for the boxing match. I don’t even know why I came that night. I just couldn’t stay away. When I found Leo with a woman … I went a little mad. We argued in the alley. I stupidly accused him of lying and cheating and a slew of other unfair things. When I finally gave him a chance to explain, he told me he’d decided to finally marry. Do his duty to the title and produce an heir. He’d picked up the whore with hopes of warming to the idea, but so far he wasn’t warming in the least. ”
Far
aday looked away for a moment. “He couldn’t stop thinking of me, he said. Didn’t think he could marry anyone while he was still in love with another. So we ceased arguing and began … reconciling. And then those two brutes came out of nowhere. ” He punched the cushion in earnest. “Damn it all, if only I hadn’t been caught so off-guard. Ordinarily, I can hold my own in a brawl. ”
Julian didn’t doubt it. He’d watched Faraday dispatch those two convicts with cold, ruthless ease. And now that the man had stopped feigning injury, he moved with unquestionable strength.
“Leo was knocked senseless almost instantly. That left me outnumbered. You saw them. They were big. By the time Miss Dunn rounded the corner and screamed, I’d given up fighting back. My only goal was protecting Leo’s body with my own. We were down and defeated, and still the bastards kept kicking. ” Faraday wiped his eyes. “I hated leaving Leo there, but there was nothing I could do to save him. Vengeance was my only thought. I needed to follow his killers. Learn anything I could, even if only which direction they’d run. You can both understand, I hope, why there could never be a trial. ”
They nodded in response. If Stone and Macleod had been brought to answer their charges in court, they would have exposed the truth of Leo and Faraday’s relationship. All England would have learned of their affaire.
“Leo valued his privacy. I couldn’t do that to him. No, I needed to mete out justice myself. And I did. Though not in quite the way I’d hoped. ” Faraday sighed heavily. “It will have to be enough. ”
Lily began to cry. Julian pulled her into his arms. He drew her to his chest and held her as she wept, stroking her back and pressing a kiss to her crown. Her hair smelled like home.
“It’s so tragic,” she said after several minutes. “And so horribly, horribly wrong. You’re right, the senselessness is the hardest thing to accept. But it’s some comfort to have answers at last. ”
Yes, Julian silently agreed. Yes, that was some comfort.
She sat up straight and said to Faraday, “Those men were vermin. Villains. The Devil’s own spawn. You mustn’t blame yourself for what they did. I don’t blame you, and neither does Julian. ”
Faraday looked to Julian, eyebrows rising in unspoken question. Don’t you?
He shook his head. “See here, I’ve only just stopped blaming myself. ”
“Yes. About that …” Faraday leaned close. “You do understand, it was my assignment to investigate all the club members thoroughly. ”
Julian narrowed his eyes at him. “How much do you know?”
“Everything. ”
“Who else knows?”
“No one. ” Faraday’s voice was firm. “I didn’t include it in my report. But no one’s out for you. If someone were, I would know it. What’s more, I would take care of it. You were a good friend to Leo. ” His gaze slid to Lily. “And you, my dear. Even though we’ve only just met, I can’t help but think of you as a sister. ”
Lily gave him a tearful smile. “I’ve missed having a brother. ”
“Well, now. That’s an unexpectedly lovely end to this day. ” Clearing the emotion from his throat, Faraday shot a glance out the window. “We’re coming up on Charing Cross. I’ll get out there. After today’s events, I’ll need to see to some paperwork. ”
He signaled to the driver with a rap on the carriage roof. As the coach slowed to a halt, he rose from his seat. “Oh, yes,” he added, pausing in the open door. “Do send my regards to Lady Claudia, and kindly send me word of how it goes. I’ve grown quite fond of that girl. ”