“Squats,” I said. “And then I’m going to run a mile or two on the treadmill. Once I’m done there, I’ll do the bench presses.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Ace muttered, following me to do just that.
***
“They’re watching you again,” Ace muttered.
“They’re not watching me. Desi’s watching me. Codie’s eyes are all for you,” I amended. “And Desi is only watching me because she can’t help but check out my guns.”
“You’re so full of shit,” Ace grumbled.
“No, but really. She doesn’t even look like she recognizes me,” I admitted.
“What were you wearing yesterday?” he asked.
I thought about that for a long moment, then shrugged.
“Wranglers, a tight black t-shirt, and my cowboy boots and cowboy hat,” I said.
“Glasses?” he pushed.
I nodded once.
“Inside? At the restaurant?” he asked.
I nodded again. “It was too bright.”
I had a problem when things got too bright.
I suffered from migraines like a little bitch. If the sun was too bright, the glasses came out, no matter if I was inside or out. It was just something I had to do or suffer the consequences later.
“She probably doesn’t recognize you then,” he said. “You’re wearing shorts and a tank top. You’re also in running shoes with no hat or glasses.”
That could be it.
“That might also be why she’s staring,” he continued.
“Could be,” I agreed. “You think I should go talk to her?”
“No,” he said. “Because it looks like they’re already on their way over.”
The two women made their way over, but not to us, exactly. To the weight bench beside us.
Codie took a seat while Desi walked around and made a motion with her hands at the bar.
“You think they’re going to put any weight on there?” I questioned.
“No,” Ace murmured right back, this time straining with effort as he got the bar up once again.
He was bench pressing nearly triple Codie’s body weight.
My eyes strayed to the redhead and our gazes clashed.
She didn’t look like she gave one single shit about me. Her eyes, though I saw recognition there, looked as if they were watching a boring movie. As if she’d seen a man like me a hundred times before and she found me lacking.
I barely contained my grin.
I liked that she wasn’t impressed with my muscles. Even more, I liked that she wasn’t one of those chicks that felt it necessary to fuck around at the gym.
The gym was a serious place. It wasn’t a place to take selfies and walk out looking pretty. If you aren’t sweating and about to die as you walk out of the gym, you didn’t try hard enough.
I also liked that, though she was wearing nicer clothes, she wasn’t dressed to impress. She was dressed to work out. Her fiery-red hair was pulled back into a messy bun.
Her eyes looked bright green today. Yesterday they looked almost dull in the diner.
And her freckled face looked flushed and sheeted with a thin layer of sweat—almost like she would look if I was fucking her. Settled between her splayed thighs, pounding into her soft heat…
“Do you want to go to lunch with us?” Desi blurted.
My eyes flicked to Ace, who looked more than agreeable, then back to Desi.
“Sure,” I agreed, zero hesitation in me whatsoever.
And that was how I found myself in a restaurant thirty minutes later, once again sitting next to the woman that was soft and sweet and smelled so fucking good my dick had found a new permanent state of hardness.
***
“How long do you think they’ll keep staring?” I asked conversationally.
Codie, our surly little neighbor who for some reason was trying really hard to act like she didn’t want to be there, was the one who answered the question.
“Until we leave,” Codie answered. “They seem to have a problem with you and her sitting next to each other.”
I wanted to head home. As much as I was enjoying lunch, I was about to fall asleep on my feet—or my ass seeing as I was still sitting down. I’d been up since well before four this morning.
Nightmares had once again woken me up earlier than I would’ve liked to be woken. Nightmares that were a constant ever since we’d moved back home.
Years ago, when we were children, my father had decided that his family deserved to die. He tied each of us up to a kitchen chair. Then, once he had us all in our spots, he’d shot each one of us. Seven kids plus my mother. Then, to make sure we were really fucked, he set the house on fire with us in it, then finished himself off by blowing out his brains.
Two of my brothers, Foss and Eden, had died. They were too young to survive something like that.
Darby, Ace, Banks—my twin—and I would’ve died, too, if it wasn’t for my sister. She’d somehow gotten herself free of the zip ties that’d been holding her to the chair. From there, she’d gotten each of us free and helped us outside before the flames could touch us.
After that day, we’d been shipped off to Houston where a nice foster family had taken us in. My sister, being eighteen, didn’t get to come with us, though she did follow.
Since we’d gotten back to Kilgore and moved onto the property, it’d been overhauled. Cleaned. Made into our neat version of a home… but even though it wasn’t the same house where everything took place, each night, I still woke up with the same nightmares.
Each night, at the time that I’d been dragged from my bed in fact.
“You’re a twin?” Desi asked.
I looked over to see her studying me.
I’d missed quite a bit of the conversation, but I nodded anyway. “Yep. All my life, in fact.”
Her lips quirked.
“They’re not identical, though,” Codie put in. “You’ll see when you meet them. Callum has that brownish reddish hair and is a little bulkier than Banks. He’s also nicer and doesn’t have a constant scowl on his face,” Codie continued.
My eyes met Ace’s.
We shared a silent laugh at her thoughts.
Banks may ‘appear’ meaner, but he wasn’t. In actuality, I was the mean one. Or, better yet, we were both mean. He just didn’t bother to hide it while I did.
I liked to surprise people. It wouldn’t do to let them think that they couldn’t approach me.
I was the person that dealt with business at the ranch. The face, you could say. I had to appear approachable. That was how business worked.
“Huh,” she said. “What does Banks look like?”
“Like me, but with a constant scowl and coal-black hair,” I teased.
Desi’s lips twitched.
“Hmmm,” she teased.
“I forgot my cookie!” Codie clapped.
My lips twitched at her exuberance.
The woman beside me sighed. “I hate dieting. Cheeseburgers are so much tastier.”
I silently agreed. My salad with light dressing, paired with my bland as fuck protein, wasn’t my favorite thing in the world to eat. However, a body needed healthy fuel to stay in peak shape.
But today I was going to enjoy my cheat day. I couldn’t wait to bite into the sandwich. It looked and smelled delicious.
“You should just start working out and eat like shit,” Codie said. “It’s what I do, and it works.”
“Yeah,” Desi snorted. “Not all of us are blessed with cute little bodies like you were, though. If I allow myself to have cheeseburgers, I start to resemble them. Even if I did work out. I might be able to have a cheat day here and there once I get back on the wagon, though.”
I doubted that would ever be the case, but I sure the fuck wouldn’t be arguing with her. Food and ass size were two things I tried to stay away from when it came to women.
Chapter 4
&nbs
p; Slowly feeling less stabby.
-Coffee Cup
Desi
It was after lunch was devoured that I threw Codie to the wolves.
Not that I didn’t like having lunch with the two men and Codie, but I needed to have a small break.
One that didn’t have hot men sitting next to me, not allowing me to think.
“But I thought you were going to come over and help me decorate my tree?” Codie asked, sounding like she was desperate not to ride home with them.
“I can,” I agreed. “But I have to go to the store to get some ribbon, which means that I’ll be late. Plus, you’ve spilled water on yourself. No offense, but you need to go home before anything else happens to you. Or you die.”
She rolled her eyes. “It was just one accident.”
It was one ‘accident.’
And I say that lightly seeing as she’d purposefully spilled the water on herself before we’d gone out to eat just because she didn’t want to go.
I loved my best friend, but sometimes she couldn’t see what was right in front of her face—i.e., a man that was totally into her and was gorgeous.
“If you don’t mind, I’ll go to the store with you,” Callum said, startling me. “I need to grab shit for dinner.”
I grinned nervously, my belly starting to revolt at the thought of him coming with me.
But before I could tell him no, words started to pour out of my mouth before I could stop them. “As long as you allow me to eat said dinner.”
Ace gagged. “You don’t want to. It’s all protein powder and salads and smoothies.”
My head tilted sideways slightly, and once again, my mouth wasn’t syncing up with my brain. “I need to eat healthier… maybe I should learn how to make protein shakes… is there one you recommend for beginners? Ones that won’t make hair grow on my chin and cause my voice to deepen?”
Callum’s husky laughter rang out as he placed his hand at the small of my back as he started to lead me out the door.
What the hell was going on with my head today?
First, I’d seen him at the gym and had instantly recognized him as the man from last night.
I’d done nothing but dream of him all night long, and this morning when I’d seen him in the gym, my brain-to-mouth filter had started to malfunction.
There I was helping Codie lift, and the next thing I knew, I was asking him if he wanted to go to lunch with us.
Then I was sitting with him throughout the entire lunch, and despite having my ex-husband and his new ‘soon-to-be wife’ at his side, I’d actually enjoyed myself.
I’d. Enjoyed. Myself.
That kind of stuff didn’t happen to me anymore.
Why? Because I was Desi, the fat ex of one of the hottest men in town.
From day one, people had looked at me like I didn’t belong with Mal.
He was tall, rich, handsome and breathtaking.
I’d never really understood why he’d pursued me.
And now, here I was, allowing the same thing to happen again, only Callum was much, much hotter.
“You okay?” Callum asked, looking down at me with curiosity and worry.
I swallowed hard and nodded my head.
“Yeah,” I croaked. “Is Walmart okay? I’m kind of avoiding Target right now. Oh, and Hobby Lobby. If I go into either one of those places, I’ll be spending way more than I meant to.”
He jerked his head in a nod. “Sure. What else do you need besides tree decorating stuff?”
I thought about that for a moment.
I was going to go get a sports bra while I was there, but there was no way in hell I was doing that with him in attendance.
There was only so much I could handle and buying anything that covered my boobs just wasn’t going to happen.
“Oh, nothing,” I lied.
He looked down at me like he didn’t believe me.
“Come on,” he urged. “Tell me.”
I bit my lip, thinking about the other thing that I needed.
There was no way in hell I was telling him that I needed tampons.
No way, no how.
And with how my ex-husband reacted when periods were mentioned—i.e., as if he were still a boy-child and couldn’t handle the thought of blood, let alone the sight of it—I wasn’t really comfortable with telling him anything about it.
“Umm,” I said, biting my lip and knowing I was going to have to tell him something. “I need a new bra.”
His brows lifted. “And Walmart is a place where you can get those?”
My lips formed into a small smile. “Yes, at least sports bras. I wouldn’t be shopping for normal bras there. I have to go to the actual stores that fit you for bras, and all that fun jazz.”
I was a big girl—at least in the chest department. Depending on the time of the month, I fluctuated between a D and DD.
Luckily, Walmart had sports bras that could handle my boobs.
Because I didn’t have time to drive all the way to the next town over to visit their Victoria’s Secret.
Nor did I have time to do it tomorrow.
I had two cakes to bake tomorrow, I had a few things I needed to file tonight with the county tax assessor for my end-of-year taxes, and I also had to go help Codie with her tree.
Not that I minded that last part.
But it was still yet another thing I had to add to my list of things to do.
Knowing I had all these things I needed to do didn’t send me into a tailspin, though.
Having the large, silent man at my side who had dragged himself along with me made me feel almost… quiet.
And my brain was never quiet.
I had thoughts and ideas always swirling. Not to mention mental notes, things I needed to do, and preparations for any possibility that could happen.
Though saying that…
“I think we should do a rainbow color for our tree,” Callum said, startling me out of my head.
“Umm,” I hesitated. “Why?”
“Because I like this ornament, and this one.” He pointed to two different color ornaments. “But I like that sparkly ribbon right there. And Ace’s favorite color is bright green. Whereas Banks’ favorite color is orange.”
“What’s yours?” I found myself asking.
I shouldn’t care… but I did.
“Honestly, I like gray. Have you seen those new refrigerators that they came out with?” he asked. “It’s kind of a gunmetal gray?”
I nodded my head.
“That’s my favorite color right now,” he answered. “Kind of like that ornament right there.” He pointed to one that was sitting on top of the shelf.
“That’s a tree topper, not an ornament,” I explained. “But I like that color, too. I had a bride tell me she wanted her wedding cake decorated in that. In fact, I’ll be making that this weekend.”
His lips pulled down into a frown. “How do you do business-wise? Is the wedding cake industry a popular one?”
I thought about that for a second.
“Honestly, I liked it way better when I was doing cakes for fun,” I admitted. “I moved to a full-time business when my ex-husband and I bought our house. His income alone didn’t quite cover the cost of our monthly payment, so I bit the bullet and started doing the cake thing full-time.” I bit my lip. “I’m not saying that I hate it or anything, but it’s definitely a whole lot more work than I ever wanted it to be. I just wanted to be a simple baker. Make cakes and cookies. Sometimes throw in a little dinner here or there for parties. But now it’s something that I’m barely able to manage on my own.”
“Have you ever thought of hiring somebody?” he asked as he pulled down the tree topper and placed it carefully in the cart.
I nodded my head. “Yeah, but I can’t afford to pay them. Paying them also includes me paying for their health insurance and 401k… which I’m not sure I can handle doing for an employee right now.
”
“Have you considered just selling your house?” he asked.
I sighed and pulled down some wire to help attach the ribbon to the tree.
“Yes,” I sighed. “But nobody wants a shit ton of acreage with a house the size of mine. Ask me how I know.”
His eyes focused on mine. “I’m assuming you tried to sell it?”
I gritted my teeth. “Yep. Quite a few times, actually. I’ve put it on the market, and then taken it off, then put it back on about five times now. I put it on, then my father-in-law convinces me to take it off.”
“Why?” he wondered.
“He’s paying the mortgage for me,” I admitted. “I can’t afford to pay it on my own now.”
“Do you get along with your father-in-law?” he asked.
I nodded my head. “Actually, Malloy and I get along famously. It’s his son and me who don’t.”
He winced. “Malloy is a really cool guy. And you’re right, his son was the douche, not him.”
I scrunched up my nose in derision.
“I’m not sure where I went wrong, to be honest,” I admitted. “It’s just… at first he was a really, really great guy. But over time? He turned. Changed into somebody I’d never met before. I thought I was getting a younger version of Malloy, and it turns out I was getting a knock-off version. One that gives you the shits and makes you fat at the same time.”
There was a low, thunderous roar that had my eyes slicing away from the Christmas ornaments and ribbon to the man beside me.
My mouth fell open when he openly guffawed. “Ahhh, fuck.”
I tried to fight the smile but couldn’t quite manage it.
“It’s the truth, though,” I admitted. “He really fucked me up. When he used to yell at me for being fat, I only ate more. I’m a stress eater.”
“I think everyone is a stress eater,” he admitted. “When my mom and brothers died…” He hesitated as if he couldn’t believe he’d just said what he’d said, then continued a little more warily. “I was a stick skinny kid, always had been. But when we were taken in by our foster parents, I started eating. A lot. I gained like fifty pounds in about six months. Was known as ‘that fat, new kid’ until I turned eighteen and went into the military. Luckily, I grew into my new weight. There was one point where Banks and I didn’t even look like we were twins, I was that fat.”
Crazy Heifer Page 3