by Parker, Ali
“Did they leave?” he asked, answering the phone.
“Yep, a couple of minutes ago.”
“Are you crying in your beer?” he teased.
“No, I’m eating pie.”
He laughed. “Nice breakfast.”
“It’s got apples in it,” I retorted.
“Are you ready?” he asked, getting right to the thing he wanted to talk about.
I sighed, knowing the chances of me actually securing the funding were pretty slim. “I’m going to go over the presentation again, but I’m about as ready as I can be.”
“You’re going to wear the suit, right?”
I laughed. “The suit.”
“You only have one. It’s the suit.”
“True. Yes, I will wear the suit and brush my hair. I’ll leave my boots at home.”
“Good boy.”
I took another bite of the pie. “Cadence is going with me,” I said, dropping the tidbit of information.
“What?” he shrieked. “Seriously? She’s going to pretend to be your wife?”
“No. Nothing like that. She has a few days off and the girls are out of school. I asked her to come with me so we could have a couple of days to ourselves. I’m hoping to take her out to a nice dinner, see some sights, and have a good time.”
His snorting laughter had me rolling my eyes. He could be so immature at times. I waited for him to collect himself. “By good time, you mean sex. Didn’t you get enough sex the last couple of days with her there?”
“First of all, there is no such thing as enough sex, especially with her, and secondly, it isn’t like we stayed in bed for two days. The kids. Her mom. Not exactly conducive to a lot of sex.”
“But you found a way,” he said easily.
I couldn’t help but smile. “It was a very merry Christmas,” I replied.
He chuckled. “I’m sure it was. So, are you going to try and pass her off as your wife?”
“No. She’s going with me as a friend. Well, I hope more than a friend, but I don’t think I want to scare her off by asking her to be my wife after seeing each other exactly three times.”
“When you introduce her to the board members, what are you going to call her?”
I smirked. “Cadence. That is her name.”
“You know what I mean. Is she your girlfriend? Your friend? Your lover? I warn you, the last one might not go over so well with what is obviously a very conservative group. Fiancée?”
“No!” I blurted out. “Take a step back.”
He laughed. “Testy, testy. What are you going to call her?”
“Why do I have to give her a title?”
“Because what are you going to say? ‘This is Cadence’ sounds very cold, and if the board guys don’t kick your ass, she will.”
I grimaced. He was right. “I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it. I’ll figure something out.”
“You’ve got two days. Don’t wait until you’re in the moment.”
I sighed. “Got it. How was your Christmas?”
“Good. My brother drove up and I got to meet my newest niece. Today, everyone is hanging out at the beach.”
I laughed. “It’s very strange to hear that.”
“Did it snow?”
“Nope, but it’s cold as hell. I better get going. I need to get started on some of these decorations. It’s going to take me a week to get them all down.”
“Make sure they’re down before I get there,” he said.
“Thanks. I think I’ll leave them up now.”
“My mom is calling,” he said with a small laugh. “Gotta go.”
I shook my head, put my phone down, and finished my pie. I mulled over his advice. I wasn’t sure how I would introduce Cadence. I didn’t think I could call her my girlfriend without having a conversation with her first. I would stick with friend. I did consider her a friend and hoped she felt the same.
I stuck my dirty plate in the dishwasher and headed outside to take advantage of the nice weather. I didn’t want to be digging through snow to find the candy-cane lights. I spent the next several hours taking down the outside decorations, carefully returning them to their boxes, and storing them in the shed to use for next year. I was already planning on how to make it bigger and better for the kids.
I was getting way ahead of myself. There was no guarantee Cadence and I would even be talking next year. I realized right then that I wanted her in my life for a long time to come. I wanted to make plans for next Christmas. I wanted to make plans for the Christmas after that. I wanted her in my life.
I walked into the cabin where Laura had stayed. There was an envelope on the bed that had already been stripped. I picked it up and saw my name neatly written on it.
I quickly opened it. “Dearest Gabriel,” I read aloud. “Thank you for a wonderful time. I am happy Cadence met you. She deserves a good man and after watching you these past couple of days, I’m confident you will treat her and my granddaughters the way they should be treated. Don’t be a stranger. I look forward to having you over to my house for dinner one day soon. Take care, Laura.”
I was smiling as I tucked the letter back into the envelope. I was going to assume I had her mother’s approval to date her daughter. I couldn’t explain why, but that made me happy. I liked knowing her mother approved. I respected Laura and would have worked my ass off to gain her approval if it had not been freely given.
I folded the envelope and stuck it in the side pocket of my pants before getting busy on the cleanup process. I moved on to the cabin I had stayed in and quickly stripped the bed. While sweeping the floor, I found one of the bells that had been attached to Cadence’s panties. I grinned, sticking it in my pocket as well.
I left the pile of dirty linens sitting outside my cabin and stripped the bed in my own room. I spent the rest of the day going about my mundane tasks, all while thinking about her. I enjoyed the peacefulness of the day, but it felt too quiet.
I rummaged through the leftovers in the refrigerator before taking a plate back to my cabin to settle in for the evening. I was tempted to call her but reminded myself she had promised to call after she got the girls settled.
“Damn,” I whispered into the silence of my own cabin.
I missed them. Each of them. I missed the chaos. I even missed the squabbling.
Chapter 32
Cadence
The girls had fallen asleep almost immediately after getting into the car. I looked in the mirror, smiling at their sleeping faces. Their time in the fresh air and all the running around had worn them out. I was happy they had such a good time. I didn’t think a trip to Disneyland could have beat the enjoyment they had at the retreat.
“You look happy,” my mother commented.
I turned to look at her, my smile still in place. “I am.”
“You two are very good together. He’s very laid back. He calms you. He rounds you out, softening all those sharp edges you have.”
“Hey,” I protested.
“I only meant that your past experiences have left you jaded. Understandably so, but still jaded. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but you are different around him. You remind me of a dainty butterfly when he’s around. You get to slip into that softer side. You trust him to take care of you.”
I thought about what she said and nodded. “I do feel different around him. I feel more relaxed. I don’t feel like I always have to be on guard, waiting for whatever. With him, I feel like I have a partner. He’s there to carry responsibility, even if it isn’t his to carry.”
She had a serene smile on her face. “I’m so happy for you. What now?”
“What do you mean, what now?”
“Will you see him again?”
I figured it was the perfect opportunity to ask her to babysit for a couple of days. “Actually—”
“Yes,” she said.
I laughed. “I didn’t say anything.”
“You want me to watch the girls so you two can be toge
ther. When?”
I grimaced. “Two days from now.”
“That’s fine.”
“Are you just saying that because you’re trying to get us together?”
She laughed. “Cadence, you are together. I don’t have to try to do anything.”
“I don’t know what we are, but I think together is a bit presumptuous. We’re just seeing each other. I think. I don’t really know. We’ve never talked about what we are.”
“I think when two people click, they don’t have to have that conversation. It just kind of happens. They fall into a pattern, and then one day, you find yourself married with kids.”
I laughed. “I hope it isn’t quite that easy and lacking any excitement.”
“Will you be going back to the retreat?” she asked.
“Ever?”
“No, in a couple of days.”
I realized I hadn’t filled her in on our plans. “We’re going to New York. Well, he’s going, and I’m going with him.”
“What’s in New York?”
“He is giving a presentation to a foundation that is considering his retreat for a large donation. He has a lot of plans for the place. I’m going along for moral support.”
She nodded. “I hope he gets it. I think he can do some great things. I’m glad you’re going with him.”
“Me too.”
She was quiet for several minutes. “The girls love him. I mean absolutely love him. I can’t believe how much Hazel opened up around him. She’s usually so reserved.”
“I know,” I agreed. “He has a way with her. He gets down to her level and he gives her just enough space.”
“He’ll make a great father,” she said.
I laughed. “Slow down. No one is interviewing him for a role as a father.”
“I was. The girls were. And don’t tell me you weren’t. He is kind and gentle and patient. I would have advised you to try and find a man with at least two of those qualities, but you found one with all three. That’s a rarity.”
“He’s not a prized cow,” I said dryly.
She giggled. “Brand that boy!”
I groaned. “You’re terrible.”
“I wish your father was here,” she said in a quiet voice. “He would be so happy to see you pulling yourself out of that nightmare that was Trent. He worried about you so much. All we wanted for you is for you to be happy. That’s all we ever wanted. I hate that he didn’t get to meet Gabriel.”
“Me too,” I whispered. “Me too.”
“I’d like to think dad is up there watching. Maybe he sent Gabriel to you.”
I smiled, fighting back the tears. “I’d like to think that too.”
“It makes sense,” she said with a strange look on her face.
“What makes sense?” I asked.
She waved a hand at me. “Gabriel coming into your life. You’ve fallen for him. The girls are absolutely enamored with him. I really like him.”
“You think dad sent him my way?”
She shrugged. “Why not?”
“I don’t know if I believe all that,” I said hesitantly. “I’m not sure about all of it. I don’t want the girls to get too close to him and have him leave them high and dry.”
“Gabriel doesn’t strike me as the kind of man that would ever walk out on anyone. Worst-case scenario, if the two of you decided not to be together, I am willing to bet my house he would still want to be in the girls’ lives. He cares about them. You can’t deny that.”
I smiled. “No, I won’t deny that, but what happens if I meet someone else? How weird would that be?”
“You are getting way ahead of yourself. You’re letting those insecurities Trent gave you rule your life. Trent was a bad apple. Real men work to support their families. Real men love their families and do whatever it takes to make them happy. Trent was not a man at all. He was a user and a loser.”
I laughed. “Gee, Mom, tell me how you really feel.”
“Oh, don’t get me started. I’m keeping it G-rated because the girls are in the backseat. Trust me, if I said how I really feel, you’d want to wash my mouth out with soap.”
“I know, I know. I feel the same way, but I can’t say anything disparaging about their father—regardless of the truth.”
“Stop trying to find a problem with him. Accept it for what it is. I would like to think there are more good people like Gabriel in the world than people like Trent.”
I wanted to fall head over heels and accept everything at face value. I couldn’t. My time with Trent had made me question everything. I questioned my worth, my value, my beauty. He’d made me feel like I was undeserving of him. He’d made me think I owed him for being with me because he was some big prize.
“I don’t want to be manipulated,” I confessed.
“Trent was a manipulator. Gabriel is not. Listen to your old, wise mother. I have been around the block a few times and feel I’m very good at reading people. Gabriel isn’t a bad guy.”
I blew out a breath. “I’m not saying he’s a bad guy, but I’m not sure I’m—you know—better.”
“Better?” she asked. “Better at what?”
“Not at anything. Trent is my baseline. Anything Gabriel does is going to be better than Trent, but does that mean it’s safe to go all in? I guess I don’t trust myself. I fell hard and fast for Trent. I had blinders on. I couldn’t see him for who he really was.”
She reached across the center console and touched my forearm. “Trust yourself. Trust me. He isn’t him.”
I licked my lips, tamping down the old fears that always reared their ugly heads at the exact wrong time. I hated Trent for what he had done to me. He’d messed me up. Two years on and I was still struggling to be my true self.
“I’ll try,” I answered. “I’ll try. One step at a time.”
“Good. That’s all I can ask.”
After dropping my mother off at her house, it was back home to take care of putting away all the new toys. The girls were hopping with excitement.
“When are we going back?” Hazel asked.
I laughed. “We just got home.”
“I want to go back,” Autumn said. “Can we live there?”
I raised my eyebrows. “It’s kind of far to carpool.”
“You can take us to school,” Hazel reasoned.
I scoffed. “That’s an hour each way!”
“Can Gabriel live with us?” Hazel suggested.
I rolled my eyes. “You guys are getting way ahead of yourself. Put away your new stuff. I’m going to see what we have for dinner. We might need to make a run to the grocery store.”
They both groaned.
“But we just got home,” Autumn whined.
“You were just saying you wanted to go back to the retreat,” I reminded her.
“That’s different. That’s fun. The grocery store is boring.”
“I agree, but it’s necessary. Go. I’ll call if we’re going.”
They both rushed down the hall to their rooms. I sighed and went into the kitchen, rummaging around the pantry and fridge. I had sent the leftovers with my mom. I was regretting my decision. Now, I was actually going to have to cook.
I couldn’t help but wonder what Gabriel was doing right now. Was he sitting in front of the fire drinking hot chocolate? I smiled thinking of his long legs stretched out in front of him with a cup in his hand. He always had a tranquil look on his face, like he was completely content with his life. I envied that. He’d been through some hard times in his life, but it didn’t take him down.
He was inspirational. The best part was he didn’t even know he was inspirational. He was so humble, which lent to that gentle nature of his. I couldn’t imagine him ever having any enemies. There was something so inherently genuine about him, there was no way someone could dislike him.
I focused on the hunt for dinner and found a couple of boxes of mac and cheese. That would be good enough. With that problem out of the way, I could focus on packing for m
y next trip. I didn’t exactly have a wardrobe that included dresses appropriate for a New York City soiree.
I opened the closet doors and stared at my boring wardrobe. I pushed things around. I realized then I was a very boring dresser. My clothes were in dark colors, no pizzazz. No life. No excitement. Boring slacks and blazers that were perfectly appropriate for the office. I cringed, pulling out the only little black dress I had. I had bought it before Autumn was born.
I never got the chance to wear it, and after the second pregnancy, my hips were not ever going in the dress. I didn’t know why I had held on to it. I should have donated it a long time ago. Just for shits and giggles, I tried to put it on.
I burst into laughter when the zipper got stuck halfway over my ass. Hazel came into my room and looked at me. She looked horrified. “What are you doing?” she asked.
“I was trying on a dress.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m going out to dinner with Gabriel in a couple of days and I want to wear a nice dress.”
She looked me up and down. “That one is too small.”
I laughed at her very blunt statement. “Yeah, it doesn’t fit.”
“What will you wear?”
I turned to look at her. “I guess we’re going to have to go shopping tomorrow.”
“I’ll help you pick out a dress,” she offered.
I smiled. “Thank you. I would appreciate your help.”
She left the room and I very carefully wiggled myself out of the dress. I would add it to the pile of stuff that was headed to the secondhand store. I dressed in my lazy-day attire and got busy doing the laundry and simultaneously packing a second bag for my trip.
I was looking forward to a change in scenery for both of us. I was especially looking forward to a nice dinner that would hopefully include candlelight and a nice bottle of wine, followed by a chilly walk along a city street still decorated for Christmas. I was learning something about myself—I was a romantic.
I had never realized I liked the cheesy stuff, but I did.
At least, I liked it with Gabriel.
Chapter 33