by Ann Atkins
He nodded.
“What did the prophecy mean by ‘two who would be strong enough to bear me’?”
“You know Anna was a witch, right?”
I nodded my head. I was glad that he hadn’t said I used to be a witch. I wasn’t ready to deal with the fact that we were essentially the same person, and I think he knew that.
“Do you remember what I said about power growing stronger over time? With each generation?”
I nodded again.
“Well, Anna’s power—since she was bound to the earthly plain and held captive in that crystal—continued to grow over the centuries. It’s why you’re so powerful and why your parents needed to be as well.”
“It’s part of the price, isn’t it? It’s the reason I’m hunted and the reason that I was trapped in that crystal for centuries.”
“Yes, it is. When the witch said there would be a price to pay, I thought I would be the one to pay it, not you. And I’m so sorry you’re suffering for my mistakes.”
I had seen that look of sorrow on his face before, and suddenly, it all made sense. He was always so apologetic when something bad happened to me; I had believed it came from a place of love and caring, but I now realized, it came from a deep well of guilt.
“Do you think your mother is right? Will there be consequences for the way I found out?” I asked nervously
“I don’t know, but I hope not.”
There was a nervous flutter in my stomach, but I appreciated his honest answer.
“What about the last line of the prophecy? ‘Claiming my powers will slay my enemies’? Didn’t we already know that? I’ve been practicing for almost two months now.”
“I think it means all of your powers, Allie,” he said, waiting for the stubborn look to cross my face. I did not disappoint him.
“You know I don’t like the kitsune power of possession!” It’s the only power that I had consistently refused to practice. “It’s evil and it makes me feel dirty and wrong. I have plenty of other powers to ‘slay my enemies’ with. What is the point in learning that particular one?”
“I honestly don’t know,” he shrugged. “I’m just telling you what it says, but I don’t see how being able to possess your opponent—if you are attacked—is a bad thing. You could stop the fight before it even gets started.”
“Possessing Erin’s slutty self was bad enough! I felt everything she felt. Imagine what possessing the mind of pure evil would feel like; it would be like drowning in toxic, black sludge! I just can’t do it, Mason.”
He sighed in frustration, but he let it go. It was an argument that we’d had before and one that he’d lost before.
“There’s something else I need to know, but it isn’t about the prophecy. It’s about the recurring dream I was having for several months before I met you.”
“You want to know if the Joshua in the warehouse was me?” he asked. I nodded. “Yes,” he said with a deep sigh, “it was.”
“But you looked so much older; I’d say at least thirty.”
“It’s because I hadn’t fed. If I’m deprived of blood for long periods of time, I age pretty rapidly,” he explained.
“But you did it to yourself! Why?” I asked accusingly. “Why did you want to kill yourself?”
“There are many reasons,” he said vaguely, not looking at me.
“Then it’s a good thing I have lots of time.”
He sighed again. “The crystal had begun glowing about four months before that. I broke it like I was supposed to, and then I sought out a witch. I wanted to find you as soon as possible. She cast several spells to locate you, but none of them worked. Finally, she invited her coven and two others to help with the spell, and it worked … or so I thought. The woman I was led to was newly pregnant, but there were complications and she miscarried. I thought I’d lost you all over again, and I didn’t want to live in this world without you,” he said sadly.
“But the spell obviously led you to the wrong person,” I said.
“Yes, I was never meant to find you with magic; it was supposed to happen naturally, and because of my impatience, I almost ruined everything.”
“But that wasn’t the only reason you wanted to die, was it?”
He shook his head.
“Tell me,” I said softly.
“Allison, I was a killer,” he said with his eyes full of pain.
“No! I don’t believe that!”
“It’s true! And I was sick of seeing a monster every time I looked in the mirror. You were the one person I believed could redeem me … and I thought you were gone.”
“Who did you kill?” I asked in a voice that was much calmer than I felt.
“I didn’t know their names, but even if I had … there were too many to remember. There were no blood banks back when I first turned, but that isn’t an excuse, because I kept doing it centuries later. I didn’t have to drink enough to kill; I did it because I wanted to.”
“You slaughtered innocent people?” I asked, my voice betraying a little of the fear I was feeling.
“No. Never!” he assured me. “I didn’t hang around in the nicest of places back then, and the people who inhabited those places weren’t much better. The people I killed were monsters in their own right, and the rest of humanity did not suffer from their loss. I had convinced myself that I was providing a service, that the rest of the world would be a better, safer place because of me,” he said with a humorless laugh.
“It probably was,” I told him when I finally remembered how to speak.
“But don’t you see, what I was doing made me no better than them. I had also convinced myself that I was creating a safer world for you to be reborn into … but when I thought I’d lost you, none of it mattered anymore.”
“It was also because you blamed yourself for Anna’s death, wasn’t it? You wanted to protect others the way you hadn’t been able to protect her.”
He smiled sadly. “Yes, but I was misguided. I think they were all surrogates for Prudence, because I wasn’t able to kill her.”
“Not that I’m advocating murder, but why couldn’t you kill her?”
“I went to her house the night after Anna was hanged, and I would’ve gladly snapped her neck, but I don’t kill the innocent.”
“How was she innocent?” I asked incredulously.
“She wasn’t, but her baby was. She was pregnant, Allie. I could hear the baby’s heartbeat.”
“How could you?” I asked as my eyes filled and overflowed. “How could you sleep with her?”
“It wasn’t mine. I promise you that, but I think it’s the reason she was so anxious to marry me, because the baby’s father had refused to wed her.”
“So she destroyed our lives just so everyone wouldn’t think she was a big whore?”
“Yeah, and then I spent the next three centuries destroying myself. And if Alex hadn’t found me when she did, I would have finished the job, and I wouldn’t be sitting here with you right now.”
I stiffened at the mention of her name as I recalled the beautiful, blond Alexandria Summers from that first dream. He had smiled fondly when he’d said her name, and I wondered just exactly how much she’d meant to him, but I didn’t ask.
“You didn’t rip her head off did you?”
“No, why?” he asked, looking confused.
“You were starving, remember? So why didn’t you attack her?”
“Because she was using her magic to control me.”
“I thought she was human,” I said, confused.
“I thought so too, at the time, but I was so weak I wasn’t able to detect her power, which made it easier for her to control me.”
“If she was so powerful, why was she running through the alley screaming?” I asked, hoping that he could not detect the note of jealousy in my voice.
He laughed. “The screaming was coming from her pursuers. They thought they were being chased by giant spiders and snakes. He laughed again, and I knew. I could read it o
n his face.
“You loved her, didn’t you?”
“More than anything,” he replied. “She gave me the best gift anyone has ever given me.”
“What was that?” I asked as I grinded my teeth.
But he still didn’t notice the pale shade of green I’d turned, jealousy was so not my color! He stared at me intently for a few moments, and then a beautiful smile lit his face.
“You,” he finally answered. “She gave me you.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Aching
“What?” I asked as my heart skipped a beat.
“She was your mother, Allison.”
“You knew my mother?” I asked in shock.
“Yes,” he replied.
“And my father?”
“Yes.”
I felt a sharp pain in my chest as another hairline crack formed in my heart. “Why didn’t you tell me? You know how desperate I’ve been to find out who they were! You could’ve told me this without revealing the rest, so why didn’t you?” I asked accusingly.
“You know that isn’t true. If I’d told you how I met your mother, I would’ve had a lot of explaining to do. It was almost eighteen years ago! How was I gonna explain that I knew her, when I wasn’t even supposed to have been born yet?”
His eyes begged me to understand, but my heart wouldn’t let me. I was so sick of being lied to ‘for my own good’. They were my parents, and I’d ached for the smallest detail about their lives ever since I found out. I wanted to know that once upon a time I had belonged somewhere. Someone had wanted me. Someone had loved me.
“Allie?”
I glanced up to find him staring at me with love and concern. And I didn’t want it! The only thing I wanted from him right now was the truth—the one thing he had consistently denied me.
“You could’ve made something up; you’re really good at that! You didn’t have to tell me that you actually knew them. Couldn’t you have at least given me a name … or a photo? Would that have been too much to ask? You couldn’t have given me one or two threads of truth from your web of lies?”
“The devil is in the details, Allie, and I was afraid I’d slip up and say something I couldn’t explain away, which would only spawn more lies, and I didn’t want to give you any more reasons to hate me.”
I smiled sadly. “You’re right. I do hate being lied to, but I don’t hate you; all of this would be so much easier if I could.”
“But can you forgive me?”
“I don’t know. It’s all just too much. First, I’m not human and I have powers. Then, my father isn’t my father; he kidnapped me and killed my parents. And finally, I find out I’m the reincarnation of a dead witch, and the people that I trusted so completely lied to me about it all.”
A thousand emotions flickered across his face, but he didn’t say anything. He couldn’t go back and undo the hurt he’d caused, and I couldn’t stop blaming him for it.
“Will you tell me about them?” I asked after several moments of silence.
“Yes, anything you want to know,” he smiled sadly.
“What was my father’s name?” I already knew my mom was named Alexandria, but I knew nothing about my dad.
“His name was Brian Summers,” he answered, reaching me a small photo of a laughing couple. The woman had blond hair and brown eyes, like me, and the man had light brown hair and eyes the color of dark chocolate. They didn’t look much older than Mason and I. He stood behind her with his arms around her middle and his hands resting on her slightly rounded stomach. I felt my throat tighten and my eyes sting. It was a family photo—the only one I had; the only one I’d ever have. I was nothing more than a little bump, but we were together, and that’s all I cared about.
“When my mother found you … you said it was almost eighteen years ago. Was she pregnant with me, then?”
“Yes, about four months.”
“And she knew about all of this prophecy stuff?”
“Yeah, she did, and when she told me about you … there’s no way to describe the joy I felt, but it couldn’t last.”
“Why?”
“Your mother and father didn’t have a home. They moved around all the time. It was the only way to keep you safe. We weren’t the only ones who knew about the prophecy. There were a group of humans who called themselves the FDPSO (Federal Department of Paranormal Studies and Observations). They were a small, secret branch of the government charged with the capture and study of supernatural creatures. They were trying to develop ways of transferring powers to humans, in order to create a race of super-soldiers to send into battle, but most of their test subjects died— including the humans—so the project was axed. But there were still a few zealots who refused to give it up, and their primary target was you.”
“But I wasn’t even born yet!”
“They were trying to capture your mother and keep her until you were born.”
I felt like I was gonna puke, because that’s exactly what must have happened. David had taken her and waited until I was born, then he’d killed her.”
“Did they hate me?” I asked with tears streaming down my cheeks once again.
“Oh, Allie, no, sweetheart,” he said as he gathered me in his arms. “Why would you ask such a thing?”
“Because it was my fault. I was the reason they lived in fear,” I sobbed. “I’m the reason they were killed.
“No, it is absolutely not your fault! You were just an innocent little baby. And they only feared for you, not themselves. Keeping you safe was the only thing that mattered to them. I’ve never seen two people more in love with their unborn child. That’s why your mother cast that cloaking spell on you. And your father obtained so many powers that even he didn’t know how many he had.”
“What do you mean he ‘obtained’ powers?”
“It’s the reason you have so many other powers that aren’t tied to your bloodlines. Your father could absorb the powers of other creatures by drinking from them,” he explained.
“You mean he stole them?” I asked, deciding not to focus on the fact that he’d told me he didn’t know where my other powers came from.
“No, the donors kept their powers, but your father acquired them too.”
“Donors?” I asked in confusion.
“Yeah, there were lots of supernatural beings willing to join the fight, but they didn’t just do it for you. Some of them had friends and family that had been captured and killed by the FDPSO. They wanted to help your father amass enough powers to protect you, but they wanted justice for their loved ones as well.
“How did they manage to finally capture her?” I asked. I really didn’t want to hear the details that had led to my parent’s murders, but I needed to know.
“There was a traitor among those we believed to be friends.”
“You said my father drank from others to get their powers, so he was a vampire, right?” He nodded. “And my mom was half kitsune and half fey?” He nodded again. “Well, if my mother had visions or premonitions or whatever, why couldn’t she tell the difference between an enemy and a friend?” I asked. “And why are you always telling me that my powers will make me unstoppable once I master all of them? My parents had all the same powers, and it couldn’t save them, so how can it save me?”
“Because you are the very best of both of them, and as far as the visions go, they’re not always clear; it isn’t an exact science, which you should know better than anyone.”
“But I still don’t understand how she was taken. Why didn’t she just cast a protection spell on herself? Wouldn’t that have protected me too?”
“Yes, but only until you were born. She wanted a spell that would keep you safe long after. She knew you’re life wouldn’t be easy, and she wanted to protect you until you were old enough to fight back.”
“Then why not cast two separate spells?” None of this made sense to me!
“Because a spell of that magnitude had to be carefully maintained. You have to
understand that this spell was meant to last until your eighteenth birthday. That spell should have been cast by an entire coven of witches, but there were only two. We moved around too much, and we didn’t know any other witches. Alex refused to bring in outsiders to help with the magical burden. She said that she would not place her baby’s life in the hands of strangers, so there was only Sarah and Alex. The spell was too big for one—or even two people, but she said the exhaustion was a small price to pay for your life. If she had cast a protection spell on herself, it would have weakened the one she cast on you; she didn’t have enough magic to do both.”
“If she was the one holding the spell together, why didn’t it break when she died?”
“Because it was bound by blood—hers. And if she died, the spell would be sealed, and you would be safe. Her life, for yours.”
Tears were streaming down my cheeks. It was like a dam had burst inside me. She knew. She must have known what would happen to her, but still, her only concern had been for me. What must it be like to love someone that much, especially someone you’ve never even met? I was nothing but a fluttering inside her womb. She had never held me or kissed me or rocked me, yet she had been willing to die for me. I had always wondered if my mother would’ve loved me, and now I knew.
I curled myself into a ball and cried for everything I’d had and everything I’d lost. Every once in a while I would feel Mason stroke my hair or rub my back, but he never spoke a word; he just let me cry. He knew there was nothing he could do but be here for me, because the one thing I wanted above all others, he couldn’t give me. No one could. People say you can’t miss what you’ve never had; they don’t know how wrong they are, because if they’re right, why do I feel like I’m dying?
After a while my tears dried on my cheeks, and my eyes felt dry and scratchy, but the pain never left me. It simply held me in its suffocating embrace, and I dealt with it the only way I knew how. I was bruised and battered emotionally and physically, and I fell deeply asleep on a pillow soaked with my tears.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
A Deal With The Devil