by S P Dawes
Then they were alone.
“They’re lovely,” remarked Hayley once she knew they were out of earshot.
Jesse nodded whilst sitting on the floor, leaning on the coffee table; they had been there since Michael had got the dominoes out.
“Yeah, they bring out the best in each other,” replied Jesse; reminiscing over past problems they’d had. “They only ever seem to draw strength from one another.”
“That’s a nice thing to say,” answered Hayley, lost in her own thoughts; how different would life be now if she’d had the same experience?
“It’s true, I just wish my marriage had been like that,” she looked up at him shocked, realisation dawning on her.
“You’re married?” The look of panic on her face made him instantly regret saying it. After everything he now knew about her, explaining he was married after they had kissed the other night had to be the most inappropriate thing he could have done.
“No,” he tried to reassure her. “We’re not together anymore, so technically yes, but the divorce is en route.” She didn’t look as content as she had the rest of the evening; he cursed himself for putting his foot in it again. “I found out she was having an affair,” he confided in her.
Hayley looked back at him sympathetically, and he noticed her relax again. “Sorry, that must have been tough.”
Jesse sat reliving the moment he stepped in on them. Full flow, no error in judgement, all on show. “Yeah, it wasn’t great.” Standing, he walked to the kitchen door. “I’m getting a beer; do you want one?”
She looked at the clock.
“Come on just one, don’t leave me sad drinking, thinking about my disaster of a marriage.” She laughed and nodded.
Handing her the bottle, he sat on the sofa when she asked. “How long were you married?”
“The beer was, so we didn’t continue plaster-ripping.”
Hayley smiled apologetically and drank from the bottle.
“Two years,” he answered after taking a long sip of his beer. “So, what’s your story?”
“My story? Isn’t one, really.” She took another sip and joined him on the sofa; her legs were aching after being sat in the same position on the floor for a while. Concentrating on the television, she felt like she was being watched. When she turned, Jesse was indeed staring at her. “What?”
But he just laughed and shook his head, raising his bottle to his lips again.
“OK, if we’re doing confessionals, I once went out with a guy who decided he enjoyed wearing my clothes more than me.”
Jesse nearly spat out his beer, and Hayley couldn’t stop laughing.
“Are you kidding?” He was still trying to breathe through the beer going up his nose.
Hayley shook her head, laughing at the memory of it and Jesse’s face.
He slipped his beer bottle onto the table and then grabbed her face with his right hand and kissed her on the lips. She could taste the beer. This time she wasn’t ready for it, but it didn’t matter. He took her beer from her hand and placed it on the table, not relinquishing her lips. Then placing his free hand on her neck, he stroked it as he explored her mouth with his. He knew now not to touch her back, but he was struggling to think of where to touch, so he ran his hands down her arms. She cupped his face in her hands and they both enjoyed each other’s bodies being close, touching, forcing them to deepen the kiss.
“I think we should stop,” said Hayley, trying to open her eyes and focus.
Jesse stared into her eyes, worried he had scared her off again.
“You need to know something.”
Jesse shook his head and kissed her again.
“Jesse, stop! I can’t.”
Jesse stopped immediately, looking deeply into her eyes. He could see the war inside her.
“We can’t do this,” she pleaded.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, not understanding. She clearly liked him as much as he liked her. He’d made sure his hands had stayed on neutral ground, so it wasn’t that.
“It’s... just too...” Hayley wasn’t sure how to word what she was feeling, she wasn’t even sure what she was feeling. Her body was screaming for her to just shut the hell up and continue with having her heart ripped out, but her head was telling her to back the hell up.
“Quick?” Jesse finished.
Hayley nodded.
“I wasn’t expecting anything, I’ve just been dying to kiss you all night, and I needed the Dutch courage.” He looked over towards the bottle of beer.
It made her feel a little better that he was just as nervous.
“I’m not going to rush you into anything, I swear.” Jesse leant in closer to her again, with his eyes wide open in case she pulled away.
Head screaming, she bit her lip watching him move towards her; body ramped up; over charged hormones took over. Touching his neck, she brought him closer to her, and kissed him slowly but passionately on the lips. They were once again swept away with each other.
Jesse made sure he didn’t move his hands anywhere that may panic her or make her stop. Hayley kept her hands on his chest, ready to push away if she needed to. Feeling her hands slacken on his chest gave him the confidence to continue. She tasted so sweet; he didn’t want it to end.
Hayley felt dizzy. She wasn’t sure how long they had locked lips for, but she needed to take a breath. Pulling away, she covered her mouth with her hand. “Wow,” she exclaimed. Glancing at Jesse, she could see the desire in his eyes and then they washed over with a nervous smile.
“That was better than the first time,” she giggled. Alarmed at the noise she had made; she threw both hands in front of her mouth.
Jesse just shook his head. She possessed the innocence of a child, but the body of a woman, and a damn fine one at that.
Chapter 11
The next day Jesse’s alarm rang out, flinging his pillow at it, knocking it over, it ceased.
Groaning, he opened his eyes to the sunlight beaming in through the curtains. Getting dressed in trousers, shirt and tie, he finger-combed gel through his hair, realising it needed shampooing. Opening the door, he ran downstairs.
Marie stood in the kitchen making a pot of tea, four rounds of bread stood proudly in the toaster.
“Your Dad’s in the bathroom, he’ll be out in a minute.” Jesse massaged the back of his neck, stiff from waking up.
Turning to the sound of the toaster popping, Marie flicked toast onto the breadboard, buttering two slices she handed them to Jesse. Taking them, he sat down at the dining table.
Marie gave him a cup of tea as he bit off a corner. The breakfast routine: a well-practiced machine over the years. Helping her husband get ready for work, then her sons. It was something Jesse had missed when he’d moved out. The routine was comforting.
“How’s Hayley?” He looked up at his Mum shrugging. Something flickered in her eyes that made him weary, but her turning round to the fridge halted him from figuring it out.
“I’ve no idea, not seen her this morning,” answered Jesse, taking another bite, hoping he was showing no signs to alert suspicion.
It had taken an age to get to sleep last night. All he could think about were her lips and her body underneath his fingertips as they absorbed her tiny movements. He couldn’t remember wanting anyone this badly before, she set something alight inside him, and she barely had to do anything. He’d had women throw themselves at him before, and never had a reaction like what she brought out in him, just by biting her lip or flashing that giggle his way.
“Yeah, you two went to bed late last night.”
Daydreaming, he realised he was being spoken to and tried to grasp what she’d said. His mum watched, wearing a silly grin with suspicion in her eyes. Adjusting his face, he feigned disinterest.
“I don’t need you turning into Cilla Black,” he warned, as his Dad walked in singing ‘Surprise, Surprise,’
Jesse threw a cork coaster at him from the dining table as he moved around the kitchen repea
ting the well-known T. V dating theme tune. He couldn’t keep a damn thing from them, which just made his smile broader.
Hayley woke, hearing a sound coming from beneath her. Listening, she realised someone was singing. Smiling, she picked her phone up off the floor. Seeing it was eight minutes past seven, she swung her legs out of bed, deciding to go for a shower. Leaning her head outside the bedroom, she listened for voices. She could hear they were all speaking to each other downstairs.
Skipping across the landing in her pyjamas, holding her vanity case close to her chest, having packed it with shampoo, conditioner and toothpaste, she closed the door behind her, before securing the bolt across. Looking around for the towels, she noticed an airing cupboard next to the bath. Grabbing one out, she hung it on the back of the door. Turning the shower on, she was thankful it was very much like hers at the flat so she didn’t have to try too hard to work it out, needing to be in and out as quickly as possible.
Stepping in, she felt the warm water bring her out of her sleepy existence. After washing her hair, she rubbed shower gel into her skin. Feeling rejuvenated, she turned the tap off, stepping out onto the soft, woolly, blue bath mat. Drying herself down, and binding her locks in the towel like a turban, she eased her pyjamas on before sliding the lock on the door across. Opening it, she peered out. Still no one on the landing. Turning to grab her vanity case off the side of the sink, she walked out of the bathroom, spying Jesse walking up the stairs, setting her nerves on edge. Smiling at her, displaying the dimples she’d kissed last night, produced a tinge of red to her cheeks, she couldn’t help but return the smile.
“Morning,” he whispered.
“Hi.” Feeling unbelievably self-conscious seeing him this morning after what they’d done the night before. Albeit kissing, but it had changed the dynamics between them, and she was unsure how to behave. Walking over to her bedroom, she walked in, closing the door behind her.
Leaning on it until she could hear him brushing his teeth in the bathroom opposite, she decided to get dressed; attempting to act normal was the order of the day. Throwing her jeans on with a cream T-shirt, she ran downstairs into the kitchen.
“Morning sweetheart, sleep well?” Marie handed her a mug of tea.
Hayley smiled, nodding.
Michael sat at the dining table reading the paper, with a half-empty mug in front of him and a plate of toast to the side. Jesse was in the living room; she could hear him shuffling around.
“Would you like some breakfast?”
“No thanks, I’m all right.” She didn’t want to bother Marie for anymore, she’d grab something later. Sitting down at the table next to Michael, he looked up smiling.
“I wasn’t sure where to put the towel?”
Wiping the side down, Marie turned and smiled. “Just dump it on the bathroom floor, I’ll collect everything and chuck it in the machine.”
“Well, I can do it now?” Hayley said, standing up eager to help.
Marie watched her running off, smirking. She wasn’t used to having a fellow female around the house. Usually, the closest she got to help, was the men telling her the laundry basket was full.
But it was Hayley’s skittishness that was amusing. She may be biased, but Jesse was a good-looking man and Hayley was lovely. Something had changed in the air and she wasn’t disappointed.
“There’s a basket in the cupboard, in the hallway. Just bring anything down from the bathroom, and I’ll put it on before work.” Hayley nodded and retrieved it from the under stairs cupboard that also held the vacuum, mop and other general maintenance for the house.
Running upstairs, she went in her own room first, depositing the towel and then walking across the landing to the bathroom. She scooped up all the other towels and clothes from under the sink, stashed there.
Suddenly the door closed behind her. Twisting, she saw Jesse with a smile on his face, and a glint in his eye. “I’m going in a minute; do you need a lift anywhere?”
“The bus stop, if you don’t mind?” He nodded, taking the laundry from her, placing it on the toilet before turning back to her. Cradling her head in his hands, he gently kissed her lips.
Holding onto his shoulders, she opened her eyes and saw he was smiling directly into hers. Picking up the basket again, he handed it to her. “Here you go washer woman, I’ll meet you downstairs in five, just got to grab some bits.” He gingerly pulled the door, peering out to see if anyone was on the landing before walking into his bedroom.
Hayley took a breath and tried to school her features, ridding herself of the silly childish grin that had set up camp on her face.
Entering the kitchen, she bent down to the washing machine before putting everything in. Marie passed her a liquid tablet. Throwing it in, she closed the door.
“OK, I’m off. You want that lift, Hayley?” Asked Jesse, not looking at her as he entered the kitchen. Pushing his wallet into his pocket and wrapping his arms into the blazer he’d left on the chair the night before.
“Yep, I’ll just grab my phone and keys.” Running back upstairs, she pushed her keys into her jeans pockets along with her cash. Slipping her feet into her trainers, she ran downstairs. Jesse was holding the door open for her when she reached the kitchen.
“What time will you be home?” Marie inquired.
“I’m only on a short day today, so be about two,” answered Jesse.
“Not you, Hayley!”
Hayley popped her head back round the door, surprised to hear her name.
Jesse glanced at her, smirking.
Hayley restrained the urge to elbow him. “I don’t know, probably be about five-thirty,” she answered, but unsure why she was being asked.
“OK, I’ll get something nice sorted for tea,” smiled Marie.
“No, you’ve done enough, I’ll sort myself out,” Marie looked at her unconvinced, “honestly.”
Shaking her head, “OK, if you’re sure?”
Hayley nodded, thanking her for the offer.
Jesse finally closed the door and walked round the corner towards his car. “Did you hear that?”
Hayley furrowed her brow.
“They’ve already got you moved in as family.”
Hayley laughed and climbed into his car.
“Which bus stop?”
Suddenly Hayley felt a stab to her gut. She’d never had this before. It almost felt like she belonged, and that made her nervous. When they found out, she’d have to walk away.
Realising she was being spoken to, she quickly snapped out, “The one near the white swan.” Hayley belted up, unable to shake off a feeling of dread.
When Hayley arrived at work, Sam was already halfway through making the crème caramels for lunchtime. Raising her head to see Hayley enter, she smiled. “It’s Ash’s day off today, so I’m in charge.”
“OK, where do you want me?” Hayley asked, tying her apron around her waist. She liked the days Sam took charge. The kitchen always felt more relaxed.
“Can you check we’ve got enough for lunch time? If there’s nothing need doing, start on the lemon drizzle and juices?”
Hayley nodded, walking towards the fridge, counting portions.
Making her way downstairs, she retrieved a box of oranges for the juice machine. Taking six lemons out of their crate and placing them on top of the other citrus fruits, she picked them up carefully, shifting their weight into her arms.
Walking past the lockers, something caught her eye. Turning back, she saw what had grabbed her attention. Stepping closer, she peered at the offending object.
Instantly recognising ‘The Vine Cross’, she froze.
The cross resembled the usual Christian Cross except for the split at the bottom, that raised itself at the sides, representing a Vine with a spade on each end, holding a bunch of grapes between the Vine and the Cross by the arms.
It hung from her locker in a twisted gold chain.
Hayley put the produce down on the floor, lifting the chain off. Holding it in th
e palm of her shaking hands, she quickly pulled her keys out of her pocket. Opening her locker, she stuffed the necklace within it, locking the door, as if to stop its power radiating through. Looking around sharply, checking no one had witnessed her odd behaviour, she took a lungful of air.
Her heart sped up and her head pounded from the vibrations of it.
They had found her.
Hayley went to bed exhausted, unable to get the pendant off her mind, but she equally couldn’t stop thinking of Jesse and that kiss. She’d never been kissed like that before, and his honesty was refreshing. She could smell an ulterior motive from a mile away, but she hadn’t got that sense with Jesse. He just seemed genuinely interested in her. It was nice. The feeling warmed and comforted her, especially that someone like him could find her attractive. He seemed so well put together, even though he joked about living with his mum and dad. He had left, married, split-up and seemed like he’d been through the mill, but he was still autonomous. She envied him the peace he seemed to have found and hoped some of it would rub off on her.
She still jumped at loud noises or when someone appeared out of nowhere. Having her back to the chefs when she prepared starters was a feat. She constantly listened out for changes in tone or behaviour, and it was exhausting. But with Jesse, he somehow made her feel comfortable. She couldn’t put a finger on how he managed it so effortlessly.
The niggle remained in the back of her head. What if her past came back? Or he discovered it? What would Jesse think of her then? Would they think she’d left?
The thought of telling him terrified her. She couldn’t witness his opinion of her change.
If he found out, he’d be angry with her. Biting her lip, she suddenly tasted metal and let go. She couldn’t decide anything now, anyway. Maybe this would fizzle out, then there would be no reason to explain. She’d just let things roll on until it was right. Closing her eyes, smiling, remembering that kiss and the look in his eyes, she fell to sleep.
The next evening Hayley stood in the kitchen with the music blasting out from the radio. As a thank you, she had told Marie that she would cook tonight. She wanted to show her appreciation for their hospitality by doing something they might enjoy, whilst saving her from doing a job. They had taken her in without knowing her and provided her with a warm and comfortable home. Not only had they allowed her to share their house, but they had treated her with respect and she felt as though they had welcomed her into their family, if only temporarily. The feeling of acceptance was a recent one, and she wasn’t sure how else to show how much that meant. So, making a meal seemed like a good idea.