by Kaylee, Katy
She laid her head on his chest, listening to the deep drumming of his heartbeat. “I wish we didn’t have to go to separate rooms. I just want to fall asleep in your arms, wrapped up in blankets. I want to wake up in the middle of the night with you taking my clothes off and making love to me out of nowhere. I want to feel secure in my choices, and not have to hide from everyone.”
Logan kissed the top of her head. “I know. And that may happen, but we both know that right now they would lose their minds. Not to mention your parents would be hard pressed to let you spend the night in my room under their roof.”
She scoffed. “They are old fashioned as hell. They would probably move me to the basement and put a lock with a key on the door. I’d be chained up in the dungeon until it was time to leave for college.”
With those words, they both fell silent. Amber couldn’t help but feel a dip in her chest anytime she thought about moving and leaving him behind. Logan, sensing the tension, leaned back and kissed her again. “Come on, I’ll walk you to your door. We should both get some sleep. There’s a party tomorrow.”
Amber had completely forgotten. “I’ll send you sexy stares from across the party.”
Logan chuckled. “I look forward to it.”
Logan
The sound of enchanting strings played lightly in the background of the Stark home. Logan perused the appetizer table, picking up a shrimp and a mini quiche. He stood to the side and ate them, looking around at all of Matt and Lisa’s friends. He had never really liked those kinds of parties, but after almost a decade living with the Stark family, he had gotten pretty used to them. Once he went off to college, he was spared them most of the time, but on occasion he would find himself in an expensive suit and flashy tie, wandering around the back corner of the house.
“Oh, is that you, Logan?” an older lady said, approaching him with her hand out.
“Mrs. Langston. It’s so good to see you. How are you?” he responded, thankful he remembered her.
She sighed. “I’m okay. My husband passed away last year, and I’ve had some problems walking, but other than that my spirits are high.”
Logan patted her gently on the back. “I’m so sorry to hear that. You look as young and spry as ever, just the way I remember you from ten years ago when we first met.”
She giggled. “Oh, aren’t you the charmer. Congratulations on your graduation, Matt says you are planning on opening your own business.”
Logan chuckled. “I am, eventually. Nothing concrete yet.”
She shook her head. “I don’t blame you for not going into the movies. The business used to be so glamorous but now with all the technology I can barely keep up with a story line. It could be because I’m old, too.”
They both laughed. She patted Logan on the arm. “You enjoy the party, young man. I’m going to go get some punch and find a seat to people watch.”
Logan leaned down, kissing her on the cheek. “You let me know if I can get you anything.”
She smiled and shuffled off toward the bar. Logan smiled to himself, thinking about how funny and full of spark she used to be. He could remember her standing up to Matt on almost everything, but he loved her like a mother, so she was at every event. Logan glanced up across the room, catching Amber’s eye. She giggled and went back to talking quietly to Taylor, who was eyeing him up and down.
Logan wondered if Amber had told Taylor about him and her. She definitely needed someone to talk to, that was for sure, but he really didn’t know Taylor that well. He had spoken to her on and off through the years, but paid little attention besides their sideways glances and giggles from the corner. She looked away from Logan and turned Amber’s back to him. He smiled and shook his head, hoping that if she knew, she wouldn’t give them away in any way to Matt and Jordan. That would be one sure fire way to crash a party.
Knowing that Taylor possibly knew only made Logan wish he could talk to Jordan about it. Jordan had been his best friend since they were kids. Their parents were best friends and had brought them together from the time they were in diapers. He had told him everything about his life, from love to loss, and had shared some of the hardest times with him. Not telling him about his feelings for Amber felt almost wrong in some ways, but he knew that he couldn’t. If it had been any other girl, even her best friend, Taylor, Jordan would have been all about it. But the one thing that was stronger than their friendship was Jordan’s love for his little sister. He was incredibly protective of her and wanted only the best for her. He wouldn’t see Logan in a relationship with her being in her best interest.
It wasn’t that Jordan thought Logan was a bad guy, but he would if he found out he had taken her virginity. He would find it strange and uncomfortable and that wasn’t something you could change someone’s mind about. It would have to stay a secret at least until they figured out if they had any chance at a future together.
Logan was finding it more and more difficult to be around Amber, though, which made it harder to keep from Jordan and the others. He had to physically restrain himself from standing next to her at all times, brushing his hand down her arm, and just taking her into him and kissing her passionately. He had never been around a girl before that made him that wild. He had always been able to be his own man and not have the need for displays of affection or extreme closeness with someone. With Amber, though, it was a completely different story. He was drawn to her like a moth to a flame. He thought it would get easier with time, but the truth was, it was actually getting harder as time went on and his feelings grew stronger for her. He couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to watch her talk to another guy not be able to tell him that she was with him.
After a few minutes of friendly greetings and standing awkwardly alone, Logan couldn’t stay away any longer and made his way across the room to Amber and Taylor. They both turned toward him, Amber clutching her hands in front of her. She looked beautiful, her hair pulled half back, and wearing a short flowy sun dress with a matching cardigan. She didn’t look like herself, but they all had to get dolled up for one of their parents’ parties.
Logan cleared his throat nervously, glancing at Taylor then back at Amber. “You look very pretty.”
Amber blushed. “Thank you.”
Taylor lifted both her eyebrows and smirked. “Well, this looks like my cue. I’m just going to leave the two of you alone.”
Logan nodded, now knowing for sure that Taylor was aware of what was going on between the two of them. He waited until she was out of ear range and lifted an eyebrow. “You told Taylor?”
Amber let out a deep breath and pulled him away from the others. “I had to talk to someone about all of this. It’s brand new to me. All these feelings and emotions were bottling up, and I had to get them out. Taylor was the only one that I knew could keep the secret and wouldn’t judge me on my decision. She was nothing but excited and supportive from the very first second. In fact, she called it before it even happened, but I didn’t believe her at the time.”
Logan was a bit shocked. “She called it? How did she know?”
Amber shrugged. “She says she saw the way you looked at me and she knew I had a long-standing crush on you from when I was a kid. I guess she put two and two together and used her psychic abilities.”
Logan chuckled. “So, you had a crush on me since you were a kid, huh?”
Amber gave him a dignified look. “I don’t have to explain myself. I was young, you were older and handsome. It was bound to happen, it would have happened to any girl.”
Logan laughed, reaching up to touch her but pulling his hand away. “It’s okay. And she was right, I’ve looked at you that way for a little while now. Probably before I even wanted to admit it to myself. And I understand you telling her, you needed to talk to someone. I’m actually kind of jealous that you have someone. I could really use a friend to get it out on the table with, but my only real friend is Jordan and he’s the last person I want to nonchalantly bring the subject up to.”
Amber grimaced. “Uh, yeah, that might be a bit of a disaster. I can see his eyeballs popping out into the punch bowl. I’m sorry you don’t have anyone to talk to. I don’t want you to feel like you are all alone in the world on this.”
Logan looked her in the eyes. “I’m not alone. I have you. Yes, it would be nice to have my own version of Taylor to talk to, but it is what it is. I will survive. If I desperately need to I can always talk to Mrs. Langston. She can’t really hear me anyway.”
Amber leaned her head back and laughed loudly. Logan just stared at her, thinking about how beautiful she looked with the sun cascading in through the windows. His eyes floated down to the short hem of her skirt and he took in a deep breath, clearing his throat and diverting his eyes around the room. He could feel her staring at him, but he didn’t want to get caught.
Amber tapped him on the shoulder. “Excuse me but what was the long sigh and dramatic shift for?”
Logan leaned toward her slightly. “Just looking at you in that dress makes me want to take you to the other room and bend you over. I could flip that skirt up, move your panties to the side and give you an orgasm in ten seconds.”
Amber bit her lip and looked around the room. “Yeah, that would definitely be ideal at this moment.”
Logan laughed. “See you did it too, diverted your attention.”
“It was everything I could do not to grab your wrist and drag you off to the bathroom in the hallway. I instantly pictured myself naked on the bathroom sink, getting plowed. My knees started to shake.”
Logan had to focus his attention on something, anything that would control the growing erection in his pants. “To be honest I would just settle with being able to walk up and kiss your lips. Put my arm around your waist and talk to people. Is it mad that I just want to be touching you all the time?”
Amber’s cheeks grew red. “Not mad at all. I feel the same way. I saw you standing across the room in that suit being sweet to an old lady, and my first thought was how I could get you upstairs to my bed without anyone noticing. Oh, the things I would do…”
“Hey, guys,” Jordan said popping up from the side.
Logan and Amber moved slowly apart and smiled at Jordan. Amber clutched her hands in front of her. “I like that tie, is it new?”
Jordan looked down at the polka dot tie. “Nah, I stole it from dad’s closet. I saw you guys over here and figured I would join the young hide out while I could. Dad is on this crazy warpath, trying to introduce me to everyone that he can and tell them how I will be eventually taking over the country. You would think he was handed a death sentence.”
Logan laughed. “Be proud of that man. That means he’s coming to terms with the fact that one day you will be running the company. He is starting to trust you.”
Jordan sipped his whiskey. “I don’t know if it’s trust so much as the understanding that he really has no other choice. You don’t want to, and Amber is on a whole other level. He is doing the best he can with what he has.”
Amber shook her head. “You need to be more positive, Jordan. Dad loves you. He knows you have it in you, otherwise he would have left the company to his CEO and just have been done with it. He wants you to succeed.”
Jordan teetered back and forth on his feet, one hand in his pocket. “I suppose. So, what were you two geniuses talking about over here.”
Amber choked on her punch and wiped her mouth. “Sorry. It went down the wrong pipe. We were just talking about the old people in the room.”
Amber glanced over at Logan, who gave her a wink. If he couldn’t be with her in public, he would at least let her know she was constantly on his mind.
Amber
Pink buds from the surrounding trees fluttered wildly back and forth. There was a haze in the air, and Amber stood in the center of the street. She held a notebook in her hand with Yale written across the front of it. In front of her Logan stood, holding her hand tightly and staring at her with his brilliant green eyes. Slowly, the scene began to shift and, like a time warp, he started to recede backward. She gripped tightly to his hand, dropping her folder to the ground, but his fingers slipped from hers. With an outstretched arm, he faded further and further back into the fog until she could no longer see him.
Amber woke up with a gasp, sitting straight up in the bed. She put her hand to her chest, feeling a sharp pain in her heart. It had been a dream, one that she knew was speaking to her. She didn’t think there was any way she could leave Logan and move to the other side of the country. She had just grown too attached to him, and there was something telling her she needed to stay by his side.
She caught her breath and pulled the covers back, turning and putting her feet on the cool wood floors. She shook her head and groaned, finding that her decision was crazy, but heartfelt. She got out of bed and changed her clothes, carefully pulling her hair back into a ponytail. She made her way downstairs where everyone was gathering toast and bagels and enjoying their morning coffee.
Amber walked over to the coffee maker where her mother was standing and kissed her on the cheek. “Morning, Mom.”
She turned and smiled at first, but her smile quickly faded. “Amber, you look peaked. Are you feeling alright?”
Amber nodded. “Just a lot on my mind.”
Her mother looked at her with concern. “Anything I can do to help?”
Amber thought about it for a second, and then turned to her. “Actually, yes. I wanted to ask you something. Something I’ve been thinking about for a little while now.”
Her mother put down her mug. “Of course, honey. What is it?”
Amber swallowed hard. “Well, I wanted to know, and this isn’t a firm decision yet, but how you would feel if I withdrew from Yale and decided to go to school closer to here? It’s something that has been weighing heavy on my mind, and I had a dream about it last night. We are getting closer and closer to testing deadlines, and I think it’s something that I should be making a choice on soon. Of course, I wanted your opinion on the matter.”
Her mother looked confused. “But I thought this was what you always wanted.”
Amber shrugged, seeing Logan’s head shoot up from behind her mom. She diverted her eyes, though, not wanting anyone to make the connection or draw attention to the two of them. “I thought it was, but now that I’m out of school things started to change, I guess.”
Amber’s father walked over and kissed his wife on the cheek. “What’s this?”
Lisa, slightly thrown off looked at her husband as he poured her coffee. “Amber is thinking about withdrawing from Yale and going to school closer to here. She wanted to know how I felt about it.”
Amber watched her father’s face straighten. He slammed the coffee pot down and turned to her. “I don’t understand. This has been a longstanding dream for you. You worked your ass off to get into there, and it is a one-way ticket to a successful future. If you do this, you are going to throw your whole life away. It’s one thing to want to study history, I can swallow that, but I can’t swallow the idea of you just tossing your future into the trash and walking away like it is no big deal. You are young, too young to make a decision on a whim like this. You can’t change like the wind in life, and I won’t allow you to start doing it now.”
Amber looked at her mother as her father stomped over to the plate of food on the counter for him. She gave Amber a comforting look and squeezed her arm. “I think it should be discussed more but, in the end, if that is what you decide, I will support you.”
Matt slammed a piece of toast down and walked out of the kitchen. Amber’s mother grimaced and turned from them, walking after him. Jordan got up from the table and put his dishes in the sink. “Wow, sis. You have the world at your fingertips and you want to throw it away without any explanation. I mean, I’m always on your side, but I can’t say I’m happy with you doing something that will ruin your chances at a bright future.”
Amber opened her mouth, but then closed it again, realizing she really
didn’t have anything constructive to say back. She watched as he grabbed a banana and strode from the room, not saying another word. Amber turned and fixed her coffee, the scene not yet settling into her head. All she could hear was her father’s words over and over again in her head. It was damaging to her psyche, to say the least, and she hated being treated like a child. She had made every right decision growing up. She never got in trouble, she always worked hard, and rarely ever needed guidance. Yet when it came down to her own life, her family couldn’t stand behind her and understand that she wouldn’t make that choice lightly. At least, she didn’t think she was.
She put her coffee down on the counter and wrung her shaking hands together. Tears were beginning to well up in her eyes. She hadn’t expected the reaction she had gotten from any of them, especially her father. She had never been chastised like that by them, and it wasn’t even something that had run through her mind when she went down for breakfast. They had always discussed things calmly, but her father had flown off the handle the same way that he did when Jordan did something stupid. The last thing she wanted was to upset her father like that, but she knew she had to stand up for what she wanted.
Amber sniffled and looked up as Logan walked over and handed her a tissue. She turned and sighed, blotting at her eyes. Logan gave her a minute to compose herself, but just having him near her made her feel so much better.
She dried the tears and tossed the tissue in the trash. Logan rubbed her arm and looked at her with caring. “Are you seriously thinking about not going to Yale? About going to one of the colleges out here?”
Amber swallowed hard and nodded her head. “It’s been on my mind for a while. I’ve teetered back and forth with it and I always come back to the same conclusion.”