Ledmore Junction

by Ian Todd

  “Aye, that sounds like a good idea, so it dis,” she agreed, jist turning tae heid fur the door when she suddenly stoapped in her tracks and turned back tae him. “Whit’s wrang wae him?” she asked, pointing tae the cat.

  “Who? Mr Hopkins?”

  “Aye. Look, he looks as if he’s jist aboot tae hiv some sort ae a fit or something, so he dis.”

  Johnboy looked at the cat. He wis back sitting oan the ermrest ae her chair, wae whit looked like a stupid, quaking grimace splashed across his face. His teeth and gums wur bared, bit he wisnae growling or hissing. Worse, the wee basturt seemed tae be staring doon between Senga’s ankles. When he followed the cat’s gaze, the crow…Majestic…Skull…Sam Majestik MacLeod, whitever the fuck it wis, wis staring oot fae between her legs at him and the cat.

  “Oh, er…ach, that’s jist him. He always sits there daeing his grimacing Chinese Lion expression, so he dis. Something tae dae wae his sweat glands…he’s overheating wae aw this warm weather,” he started tae ramble, when Senga let oot a piercing scream and landed oan him, the pair ae them falling back oan tae the chair.

  “Oh my God, Johnboy!” she screeched, as he held oan tae her.

  “Ssshhhh, ye’ll scare it,” he hissed, as the crow hopped back under the table.

  “Oh my God, Johnboy Taylor,” she wailed. “Is that that evil crow…in here…in the hoose?”

  “Look, Ah kin explain,” he spluttered, haudin oan tae her as she tried tae staun up.

  “Where’s ma flair brush?” she screeched.

  “Look, Senga, settle doon, fur fuck’s sake. It took me ages tae get it tae come in here.”

  “You!”

  “Look, let’s jist settle doon a wee bit…Ah kin explain.”

  “Ah want that thing oot ae here, right noo. Oh my God, Ah cannae believe this,” she wailed again, glaring at him.

  “Look, wid ye jist settle doon fur a sec? Ah’ll get it oot, bit in a minute. Look, it’s jist shat oan the flair wae aw yer screaming and shouting. It’s jist as well we don’t hiv carpets oan the flairs in here.”

  “Ah want that evil thing oot ae here. Look at aw the trouble it’s caused us,” she hissed, slapping him jist above his breastbone.

  “And Ah’ve said Ah’ll dae it…in a minute,” he replied, shifting her body tae the side, slipping oot fae under her and staunin up. “This, fur your information…is Skull…or maybe even that wee boy who goat himsel burnt tae death here, back in eighteen hunner and something,” he announced, no being the least bit surprised by her reaction tae that wan.

  “Ye whit? Ur you stark raving bonkers, Johnboy Taylor? Oh my God,” she sang, breathlessly. “Ah cannae believe Ah hiv tae come hame tae this efter knocking ma pan in at work aw day. If it’s no you and guns, it’s you and that bloody cat. Whit the hell hiv Ah done tae deserve this?”

  “Ach, Senga, don’t exaggerate,” he scoffed, as she jist aboot choked. “Look, Ah kin explain everything, bit ye’ll need tae keep calm and let me finish whit Ah’m trying tae say tae ye.”

  “Ah telt ye that Ah wanted that thing kept away fae here, so Ah did.”

  “Aye, and Ah heard ye, bit it wisnae as easy as you made oot. Look, it’s heidin oot oan it’s ain, withoot any help fae me,” he said, pointing across tae the living room door, as the crow hopped oot ae sight.

  “Johnboy, whit’s the matter wae you, eh? Why the hell kin ye no settle doon like any normal person wid efter whit you’ve been through?”

  “Because Ah’m no normal like other people, that’s why.”

  “Ye kin bloody well say that again,” she grumbled, heidin fur the lobby. “Don’t furget ma cauld drink.”

  “That’s no whit Ah meant,” he shouted efter her, before heidin fur the kitchen.

  “Aw, look at him,” he said, settling back in the deckchair, nodding at the crow up oan the shed roof. “That’s another wan that’ll end up hating ye, so it will.”

  “Whit ur ye oan aboot?” she asked, taking a sip ae the Irn Bru, scowling at him.

  “The beasts…animals.”

  “There’s the cat, which Ah happen tae like, apart fae when he brings in poor wee mice. Hardly worth phoning the RSPCA tae report ma animal cruelty tae.”

  “Then there’s the sheep…”

  “Sheep?” she yelped, looking aboot, sounding surprised.

  “Aye. Ewan MacKenzie is taking me tae the Lairg summer sale this weekend, so he is. Ye kin come if ye want. Iona said it’ll be a good day oot,” he said wae a wave ae his haun towards the hill behind her heid.

  “Sheep? Since when hiv ye wanted sheep?”

  “Since we goat a hunner and seventy acres ae land wae the hoose. That’s why it’s called a croft. Ye widnae want it jist tae sit there daeing nothing, wid ye?”

  “Bit…”

  “Also, Ewan telt me that we’d qualify fur a grant…us being crofters and aw that. Granted, it’s only pennies, bit it might come in handy wae me gaun oan the straight and narrow.”

  Silence.

  “Whit?”

  “Johnboy, Ah don’t know if Ah want us tae hiv a future thegither…Ah mean, me wae you.”

  “Why?”

  “Why?” she scoffed, laughing derisorily.

  “Whit?”

  “Johnboy, ye jist don’t listen. Everything Ah ask ye tae dae, ye totally ignore. Whitever Ah say, ye nod and then go and dae yer ain thing.”

  “Naw Ah don’t.”

  “Look, Ah’m no sure Ah want tae hiv this conversation jist noo…it’s been a long day, so it his.”

  “Ye cannae jist leave it at that. Whit’s yer problem…wae me like?”

  “Whit’s ma problem…ur you serious?”

  “Look, if ye’re gonnae sit there and be shitty, then ye’re right, there isnae any point in hivving a discussion aboot how ye’re feeling. You’re the wan that’s always telling me tae speak up aboot ma feelings and no bottle it up inside.”

  “Ah asked ye tae get shot ae that crow and whit dae Ah find when Ah walk through the front door? Ye’ve bloody invited it in fur its tea.”

  “Ach, don’t exaggerate.”

  “Ah saw the trail ae wee bits ae breid. It’s obvious ye wur enticing it intae the hoose.”

  “And Ah telt ye ma reason, so Ah did.”

  “Naw, ye didnae…oh, wait, so ye did. Ye telt me that that crow up there, that’s been freaking me oot fur months noo, is none other than Skull Kelly.”

  “Ah said he might be.”

  “Bit if no, ye reckon he might be some other wee boy, who died in a hoose fire here a couple ae hunner years ago who’s noo decided tae come back as a big black crow?”

  “It wisnae a couple ae hunner years ago. It wis a hunner and fifty five years ago, tae be exact. And whit’s wrang wae coming back as a crow? Ah could think ae worse things tae come back as.”

  “Ah cannae believe we’re actually hivving this conversation…in this day and age.”

  “Why? You’re the wan, alang wae yer pals, that paid fur Madam Electricity…”

  “Elektra…”

  “Tae come and get ye connected wae that wee nurse.”

  “That wis different, so it wis.”

  “The very same session that ye telt me that Skull hid come and spoken tae you and Pearl.”

  “Ah telt ye, that wis different.”

  “Aye, Ah wisnae there. That’s the only difference.”

  “So, whit exactly is yer point, Johnboy?”

  “Ma point is that Majestic up there could be Skull…” he replied, nodding.

  “Oh my God, ye’ve even gied the bloody thing a name noo...”

  “Or,” he said, jumping in. “It could be that wee boy Samuel Majestik MacLeod…who knows? So, until we know fur sure, we’re daeing nothing tae upset it.”

  Silence.

  “There’s been nothing bit trouble since that thing followed me hame fae Ledmore Junction that efternoon.”

  “That’s no true.”

  “Eh?”

  “We wur oan a hiding
tae nothing by moving in here in the first place, wae the antics ae that laird wan and his lackeys. Look at the situation noo? The tables hiv turned, so they hiv. The place is oors and they basturts hiv aw been huckled by the polis. They won’t be back tae block up any mair chimneys or cut the water supply aff noo. Problem solved,” he declared, shrugging they shoulders ae his and taking a sip ae his Irn Bru.

  Silence.

  “Talking aw which,” she said, changing the subject. “Whit’s the situation wae that private detective wan that’s been oan the go? The whole ae Assynt is talking aboot the arrests.”

  “Thanks tae me,” he reminded her.

  “You?”

  “Ah telt ye that it wis me that telt PC Long Face that they’d be hauling a load ae illegal black fish ashore the other night there.”

  “So?”

  “Ye said that ye wanted me tae become an upstanding citizen and Ah hiv. If it wisnae fur me, they basturts wid still be skulking aboot here, still planning tae undermine us, so they wid. It’s only since Majestic appeared oan the scene that oor luck his changed. Ye’re no gonnae tell me that’s a fluke.”

  Silence.

  “Hiv ye no noticed anything different lately?” he asked her.

  “Different?”

  “Aye, different.”

  “Like whit?”

  “Look aboot ye,” he invited, as she looked aboot the deserted hills.

  “Whit? Aw Ah kin hear ur the birds.”

  “Exactly.”

  “Exactly? Exactly whit?”

  “The birds ur back. When wis the last time ye heard the chattering ae birds aboot this place?”

  “Bit…”

  “If you look at the sheds and aw the wee nooks and crannies we hiv here, why his there no been birds oan the go? Ye said so yersel, no long efter we moved in. That new pal ae mine, Grizzly Chops? He telt me that efter that wee boy went up in flames, there wis never any birds oan the go up here oan Little Vestey’s Croft. Look aboot ye. There’s stacks ae them noo.”

  “Dae ye no mean flocks,” she murmured, looking aboot.

  “Since that crow arrived at your back that day, birds hiv started tae come back, so they hiv. Even Craggy Chops, Ewan and Findlay MacLeod cannae believe it. They said so themsels when they wur roond here this morning hivving a wee swatch. Findlay actually made the sign ae the cross and he hisnae been in a church since he wis married, back in nineteen-canteen. Look, some ae them ur clearly pairs, so they ur,” he pointed oot, as she continued tae look aboot the sheds and the crofthoose. “Ye’re no gonnae sit there and tell me that that’s jist a flukey occurrence, ur ye? If we hidnae been offered the opportunity tae buy this place fae that Green Lady who inherited Vestey’s Croft fae her auld maw, then Ah widnae hiv hid tae phone Donna The Prima Donna.”

  “You don’t seriously believe that the crow made that happen, dae ye?” she asked, clearly no convinced.

  “Whit Ah’m saying is that wan ae ma best pals died in a fire when he wis ten, eleven years ago. Ye’ve said so yersel, that ye believe Skull put in an appearance at that session wae that Madam Elektra wan. Ye also telt me that he’d telt Pearl no tae worry aboot a job, as there wis wan jist aroond the corner. No long efter that, oot ae the blue, Pearl goat her start wae The Glesga Echo…the same Glesga Echo that awready telt her they widnae employ somewan like her, especially seeing as she’d been caught oot lying tae them aboot hivving a qualification in journalism. Dis that no strike ye as being a bit odd? Christ, Pearl said hersel that it hid been a miracle and put it doon tae Skull, so she did.”

  Silence.

  “Since that so-called fluke, we’ve moved intae a hoose up in the Highlands here, where a wee ten-year-auld, jist like Skull, wis burnt tae death some time in the past. Flintlock telt me that this place, aboot here, is full ae ghost stories…including the wan aboot the auld duke’s factor, Harry MacKenzie, who wis responsible fur the fire up oan this croft, ended up getting his eyes torn oot by some big crow. That’s why aw the locals did away wae aw the crows up here fur miles aroond. They’re still aw superstitious aboot crows…the same as you,” he reminded her, smiling. “Skull and the wee boy who died up here wur the same age and baith baptised Samuel. Coincidence? Maybe. Ye’re no telling me that the hassle we wur getting widnae hiv continued, the same as it always hid fur that auld dear who died here last year? Whit Ah dae know is that aw the shite that’s been gaun oan aboot here fur years, looks tae be resolved. None ae that kicked in until that crow appeared oan the scene.”

  “Ah’m sorry, bit Ah’m no too sure that Ah’m following whit ye’re saying here?”

  “The Laird and aw his gofers? The basturts hiv bit the dust, bit The Laird hisnae…at least, no until this weekend.”

  “This weekend?”

  “Donna The Prima Donna his been beavering away back in the toon. She’s the wan tae take the basturt doon. The Laird works as some senior civvy accountant fur the polis back doon the road, so he dis. Seemingly, the basturt’s been skimming money aff ae them right, left and centre fur years. They’ve been checking oot his bank account. The thieving tosser his been embezzling the polis funds tae pay fur aw his businesses, including buying fishing boats up here. The wan that goat nabbed the other night there? That’s wan ae his.”

  “Donna? So, ye’ve spoken tae her…since the last time?” she asked, stiffening in her seat.

  “Too bloody true, Ah hiv. That fishing bust doon oan Vestey’s Bay the other night there, wis aw part ae the plan. Donna asked me tae set up a wee diversion that wid entice The Laird…Hamilton, oot ae the toon while she set the basturt up.”

  Silence.

  “So, you’re saying that the motive fur telling PC MacKenzie aboot the illegal fish being landed wis aw part ae a wider plan and nothing tae dae wae you gaun straight?”

  “Something like that.”

  “Why did ye no mention any ae this tae me before noo?” she accused him, clearly back tae being annoyed.

  Silence.

  “So, whit’s gonnae happen tae The Laird and that family ae his?”

  “Well, Ah don’t know aboot the family, bit Ah’d wager that he’ll be supping porridge behind bars fur a good wee while. We’re talking aboot hunners ae thousands ae pounds here, so we ur.”

  “He employs a lot ae people aboot here.”

  “No efter this coming weekend, he disnae.”

  “Whit’s that supposed tae mean?”

  “It means that the polis will want tae recover their dosh, so they’ll take back whit they’re owed…probably by selling aw his assets aff tae the highest bidder.”

  “So, everywan will be oot ae a job. Is that whit ye’re saying?”

  “Senga, let me ask ye something. Dae you think maist people aboot here ur honest and upstanding?”

  “Of course.”

  “Then, knowing there’s been a serious crime committed by a pillar ae the community…wan ae their ain, then they’d probably want justice tae be seen tae be done. Whit wis it the famous, failed advert said? Crime disnae pay?”

  “At the expense ae their jobs?”

  “Naw, at the expense ae believing in a conman like Robert Hamilton, the so-called Laird Ae Lochinver. Christ, Flintlock telt me that there’s been mair than a fair few who’ve been bowing and scraping at his feet since he arrived up here wae that wife and daughters ae his in tow ten years ago.”

  “If aw this is true…aboot him being an embezzler, then they’re clearly victims as well,” she reminded him.

  “Aye, well, they obviously hivnae heard ae that wee proverb that says, if some things appear too good tae be true, then they probably ur. Serves the crawling basturts right.”

  “Don’t say that. That’s horrible, so it is.”

  “And another thing, Senga. As an honest and respectable member ae this community, Ah hope you’re gonnae be proud ae ma involvement in bringing doon a master criminal like him, somewan who’s conned everywan that’s hid any dealings wae him. Despite whit you believe, Ah hivnae committed a crime sinc
e back in 1972 and even then, it wis only fur resetting some furniture oot ae some ae the furniture shoaps in the toon. Hardly the crime ae the century, despite being falsely accused ae shooting a couple ae bizzies and being sent doon fur 14 years. Ah’m a lot mair honest than you gie me credit fur…ma track record speaks fur itsel. If ye don’t believe me, ask The High Court judges who let me oot oan appeal last October,” he reminded her.

  “Aye, Ah suppose so. Ah’ve never really thought aboot it like that.”

  “Aye, well, they’ll be calling me Honest John next,” he said, switching oan his favourite Saint look, extracting the first smile oot ae her in a while. “Christ, the locals will probably write a wee song or two aboot me, aboot how Ah saved them fae that basturt…wance they find new jobs, that is.”

  “That’s horrible and no in the least bit funny, Johnboy. This is gonnae hit a lot ae poor people hard when they find oot, so it is. This place aboot here will collapse, so it will.”

  “Naw, it won’t. This place his been here long before somewan like Hamilton arrived oan the scene and took up residence, claiming tae be the best thing since sliced breid, so it his.”

  “So, whit’s yer new best pals saying then?”

  “Flintlock, Ewan and Findlay? They never bought intae aw his shit in the first place. They wur the real victims, alang wae Angelina MacLeod’s poor auld maw. They’re the wans that tried tae tell the locals, bit nowan wid bloody listen. A good few greedy people doon there in Lochinver chose tae staun against their ain kind, preferring tae lick the arse ae a conman in the hope that they’d pick up some ae the crumbs that fell aff the tap table, the stupid basturts. As far as Flintlock, Ewan and Findlay ur concerned, they cannae wait tae see the back ae the basturt,” he said, as she stood up and wandered across tae the shed.

  Johnboy and the cat sat and watched her. He hidnae finished talking, bit didnae think it wid go doon too well if he continued tae rub her nose in it. She wis the wan that wanted him tae be an honest ex-con and noo he wis being wan.

  Senga’s heid wis spinning. She couldnae take everything in that he’d jist telt her. It wisnae that she didnae understaun where he wis coming fae, bit it wis the way in which he went aboot opening up tae her. She thought she’d goat used tae the way he jumped aboot aw o’er the place, bit she clearly hidnae. She looked up. The crow wis staunin, balancing oan the ridge, silently looking doon at her. She tried tae stare it oot…tae see intae its soul, bit she couldnae. She turned and looked back at Johnboy and the cat. Like the crow above her, they wur baith silently watching her. She’d wanted tae ask him a lot mair questions, challenge him, bit hidnae. She knew that wid come later. If she’d continued tae sit there and press him further, she knew fine well that he’d hiv jist hit her wae mair bamboozlement, confusing her and overloading her brain wae mair information. She didnae think he did it maliciously…or tae annoy her. The Mankys always operated like that. They either clammed up or left ye bamboozled. Looking back, nothing appeared tae hiv changed in how Johnboy operated when challenged. She’d never wanted tae become his jailor. He’d never accused her ae that, bit there hid been times, like in the previous hauf an hour, where he’d pull the drawbridge up and start hitting her verbally fae aw sides wae logic that wis hard tae disagree wae. There hidnae been a day gone by since they’d first moved up tae Little Vestey’s Croft, that he hidnae telt her that he loved her. He’d only done that maybe wance or twice a week back in the flat oan Otago Street, bit up in the Highlands, he wis pretty open about expressing his affection towards her baith verbally and physically. Of course, she’d welcomed the change. He’d become a lot mair relaxed and attentive tae her physical needs, bit wur her emotional needs being fulfilled? That hid been the question that she’d kept regurgitating in her thoughts. Despite her ma saying that he wis wan ae they boys that believed he hid an answer fur everything, he still struggled tae talk aboot the relationship he hid wae his ma, Helen. Also, anything tae dae wae his experiences in the jail or The Mankys hid always been a no-go area, except fur when he brought it up as a funny anecdote when they wur hivving a laugh. He didnae come across as being mentally repressed, bit she wis sure he displayed some ae the classic signs, as in whit she’d jist witnessed and been at the end ae, a few minutes earlier. He only seemed tae go alang wae other people’s agendas when it didnae infringe or intrude oan his ain. Surely that wisnae healthy? She knew he couldnae help himsel, even if he tried…in relation tae opening up aboot his inner thoughts…or demons. Wis that whit she wis really efter fae him…some sort ae confession? Whit if, at the end ae the day, she couldnae cope wae whit he came oot wae anyway? Maybe she wis the problem. Maybe it wis her that wis looking fur an excuse tae justify walking away fae him. He wis funny, smart and complex. If she wis honest wae hersel, it wis the hidden complex side ae him that scared her. They wurnae back in the toon. There wisnae anywan tae embarrass him, so why did he persist and hing oan tae a part ae his life that he claimed tae hiv given up oan? She’d wanted tae hurt him so bad when he’d first telt her aboot phoning Donna The Prima Donna aboot buying the hoose. She loved the crofthoose and the spot where they lived. She couldnae hiv imagined in her wildest dreams that she wid wan day live in such a paradise. The surroundings took her breath away every time she stepped oot ae her front door. Efter brooding aboot it, despite her initial joy, it hid been the fact that he’d gone aheid, withoot first discussing it wae her, that hid upset her deeply. Why wid anywan dae something like that when they wur supposed tae be in a loving, sharing relationship? Who else wid put up wae something as serious as that? Why did he believe that he could take control ae something as important as buying a hoose and expect her tae jist sit back and no say anything? Wis her annoyance, naw anger, the catalyst that allowed her the opportunity tae challenge his assumptions aboot her? She knew who she wis, but did he? Did it ever cross his mind that the reason she wis so bloody angry wae him wis that he’d broken an important, fundamental agreement, that contact wae any ae that crowd fae back in the toon wisnae acceptable unless agreed between them before haun? Okay, Donna wisnae in that Manky inner circle, bit still? And then fur him tae sit there and casually admit that he’d been back in contact wae her again jist took the frigging biscuit. And when wis he gonnae tell her aboot getting some sheep? Where the hell hid that come fae? Fair enough. She knew Ewan and Iona kept sheep, so it wis probably a natural progression. She knew he spent a bit ae time wae Ewan, Findlay and Flintlock McBean. She could live wae that. Bit whit aboot the crow? If she hidnae been at the séance wae the lassies a few months earlier, she wid’ve laughed at Johnboy’s take on where he thought the scary looking thing hid come fae. Skull hid appeared that night and did say through Tricia Mearns, Madam Elektra, stuff that Tricia widnae hiv known aboot them. Poor Peter and Jean did hiv a wee boy, Pearl did get the job at The Glesga Echo efter being found oot tae hiv lied in her application and her auld flatmate, Lizzie Mathieson, did eventually find the brooch that belonged tae her granny, that she’d lost no long efter her and Lizzie moved intae their flat oan Barrington Avenue.